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Ask Karkat (Played by Karkat Vantas)

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message 1: by kuseyo (new)

kuseyo HEY FUCKSTICK.

DON'T EVEN BOTHER LEAVING ANY INANE COMMENTS FOR ME ON THIS WEBSITE. CHANCES ARE I AM NOT GOING TO GIVE A FUCK.

----

Your name is KARKAT VANTAS. As was previously mentioned, it is your WRIGGLING DAY, which is barely even worth mentioning. It is an anniversary, if anything, to lament the faults of your existence, of which there are assuredly plenty.

Equally plenty, and somewhat related to that topic, are your INTERESTS. You have a passion for RIDICULOUSLY TERRIBLE ROMANTIC MOVIES AND ROMCOMS. You should really be EMBARRASSED for liking this DREADFUL CINEMA, but for some reason you are not. You like to program computers, but you are NOTORIOUSLY PRETTY AWFUL AT IT. Your programs invariably damage the machines on which they are executed, which is just as well, since you like to believe you specialize in COMPUTER VIRUSES. When you mature, you aspire to join the ranks of the most lethal members of your society, the THRESHECUTIONERS. You like to practice with your REALLY COOL SICKLE, but just wind up looking like KIND OF A DOOFUS BY YOURSELF IN YOUR ROOM.

You like to chat with some of your other troll pals, most of which drive you BATSHIT UP THE FUCKING BELFRY. You have been trying out a new chat client beta called TROLLIAN, and you are NOT REALLY SURE WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT IT YET. Your trolltag is carcinoGeneticist and you speak in a manner that is ALMOST EXCLUSIVELY ORNERY, ALL THE TIME.


message 2: by GinAndCats (new)

GinAndCats | 971 comments Hey Karkat! Why so serious?


{♥️BunnySkullBoy♥️} (LollibombLee) Hey! Karkat! Are you angry all the time because you're self concious about your shrimpy, stubby, little horns?


message 4: by kuseyo (new)

kuseyo @Feels: BECAUSE I AM.

@Cube: YES I HAVE, IN FACT (AND PAINFULLY SO) SMILED.

@Lime: WHAT IN EVERLOVING HELL? NO WAY. NOW STOP MAKING FUN OF MY HORNS.


{♥️BunnySkullBoy♥️} (LollibombLee) Ok, next qiestion :D

What would you do if Dave Mother Fucking Strider, gave you a lapdance?


message 6: by kuseyo (new)

kuseyo WAIT WHAT? THAT WILL NEVER HAPPEN. I WOULD OF COURSE, AVOID HIM AT ALL TIMES. WHAT'S UP WITH YOUR FROTHEY LOONEYBLOCK NONSENSE?


{♥️BunnySkullBoy♥️} (LollibombLee) Ok, I'll ask you something less silly...


message 8: by Sam (new)

Sam | 192 comments Oh Lime~. What are you doing to Karkat? I already was a complete jerk to Eridan


{♥️BunnySkullBoy♥️} (LollibombLee) Asking awesome shit ^^.

now, the less silly question:


{♥️BunnySkullBoy♥️} (LollibombLee) What would happen if Gamzee, gave you a lapdance? :3


message 11: by kuseyo (new)

kuseyo WHAT KINDA FUCKERY? I REFUSE ANSWERING THAT QUESTION. LEAVE.


{♥️BunnySkullBoy♥️} (LollibombLee) I'ma take that as; you'd enjoy it ^^


message 13: by kuseyo (new)

kuseyo @Lime: AND I'M TAKING IT AS, GET THE FUCK OUT.


{♥️BunnySkullBoy♥️} (LollibombLee) Leaving, I'm leaving~


message 15: by GinAndCats (new)

GinAndCats | 971 comments Karkat, which nickname/abbreviation do you prefer?

1) Karkitty
2) KK
3) Kar
4) Kat
5) Pissypants


message 16: by kuseyo (new)

kuseyo @Feels: NONE OF THE ABOVE


{♥️BunnySkullBoy♥️} (LollibombLee) What about Kitkat?


message 18: by kuseyo (new)

kuseyo HELL NO.


{♥️BunnySkullBoy♥️} (LollibombLee) Katkins?


message 20: by kuseyo (new)

kuseyo OKAY. I CAN OBVIOUSLY TELL YOU'RE PULLING RANDOM SHIT OUT OF YOURE ASS AND THROWING IT AT ME. DIDN'T I TELL YOU TO BOOK IT?

ALL THIS CRYPTOBAFFLING MIND FUDDLERY IS FUCKING UP MY THINKPAN


{♥️BunnySkullBoy♥️} (LollibombLee) Karkles?
Karly?

Ohh, what about princess?


message 22: by kuseyo (new)

kuseyo @Lime: TEREZI ALREADY CALLS ME KARKLES AND I DON'T NEED ANOTHER IDIOT SAYING IT.

WHY ARE YOU STILL HERE?

@Cube: NO I DON'T THINK SO.


{♥️BunnySkullBoy♥️} (LollibombLee) Well, EXCUUUUUUUSE me princess~

See! it works so well!


message 24: by Sam (new)

Sam | 192 comments Karklekarkar? What if we just repete the first sylble of your name over and over again? Karkarkarkarkarkarkarkarkarkar


{♥️BunnySkullBoy♥️} (LollibombLee) Gemini ≧ω≦ wrote: "Karklekarkar? What if we just repete the first sylble of your name over and over again? Karkarkarkarkarkarkarkarkarkar"

Until it comes out as karkarkarkarnt


message 26: by kuseyo (new)

kuseyo @Lime: AND YOU DON'T.

@Gemini: SHUT THE HELL UP, SOLLUX IMPOSTER.

@Cube: NO SHIT, SHERLOCK. EVERYONE IS PRANCING IN MY BUSINESS LIKE THE CROTCHCHANCELLOR IN THE LAND OF DICKS AND PRINCES


message 27: by Sam (new)

Sam | 192 comments *sudden flip of a table* YOU AND ERIDAN SAY THE SAME THING! HE'S MERLY MY PATRON TROLL >o<


message 28: by kuseyo (new)

kuseyo @Cube: NO. I AM ANYTHING BUT CUTE.


message 29: by {♥️BunnySkullBoy♥️} (last edited Nov 11, 2012 11:02AM) (new)

{♥️BunnySkullBoy♥️} (LollibombLee) Karkat Vantas wrote: "@Lime: AND YOU DON'T.

@Gemini: SHUT THE HELL UP, SOLLUX IMPOSTER.

@Cube: NO SHIT, SHERLOCK. EVERYONE IS PRANCING IN MY BUSINESS LIKE THE CROTCHCHANCELLOR IN THE LAND OF DICKS AND PRINCES"


Karkles, do you need a hug? :3


message 30: by kuseyo (new)

kuseyo @Lime: DO YOU NEED A LIFE? AND NO, DON'T TOUCH ME.


message 31: by {♥️BunnySkullBoy♥️} (last edited Nov 11, 2012 11:04AM) (new)

{♥️BunnySkullBoy♥️} (LollibombLee) Karkat Vantas wrote: "@Lime: DO YOU NEED A LIFE? AND NO, DON'T TOUCH ME."

Why yes I do, now calm down or I'll take yours ^^


message 32: by kuseyo (new)

kuseyo @Cube: NO I DON'T. I'M NOT ADORABLE EITHER.

@Lime: YOU CAN'T BECAUSE MY SHIT EXCUSE FOR A LUSUS WON'T LET YOU.


{♥️BunnySkullBoy♥️} (LollibombLee) Aw karkles, I'd never lay a hand on you anyway :3 who'd hurt dose chubbeh lil cheeks :3 [squidges Karkat's face]


message 34: by kuseyo (new)

kuseyo @Lime: *smacks hand away* I SAID DON'T TOUCH ME.


{♥️BunnySkullBoy♥️} (LollibombLee) ... [reaches up to poke horn.]


message 36: by kuseyo (new)

kuseyo @Lime: *glares and moves away* I SAID DON'T TOUCH ME DAMMIT!!


message 37: by Sam (new)

Sam | 192 comments Lime! Da fuq is you doin? More carmex?


message 38: by {♥️BunnySkullBoy♥️} (last edited Nov 11, 2012 11:16AM) (new)

{♥️BunnySkullBoy♥️} (LollibombLee) Karkat Vantas wrote: "@Lime: *glares and moves away* I SAID DON'T TOUCH ME DAMMIT!!"

...Karly, do you need counceling?


{♥️BunnySkullBoy♥️} (LollibombLee) Gemini ≧ω≦ wrote: "Lime! Da fuq is you doin? More carmex?"

YoU kNoW iT bLaD~~~ U7U


message 40: by kuseyo (new)

kuseyo @Lime: I WILL GRACIOUSLY IGNORE YOUR COMMENT


{♥️BunnySkullBoy♥️} (LollibombLee) Karkat Vantas wrote: "@Lime: I WILL GRACIOUSLY IGNORE YOUR COMMENT"

Nooo! I'm serious! You have anger issues, possibly relating to in built feelings of self conscious inadequacy (Being short, having stubby horns ect ect).


message 42: by Sam (new)

Sam | 192 comments (view spoiler)
Karkat! The solution to your troubles!


{♥️BunnySkullBoy♥️} (LollibombLee) Just did. [cuddles Karkat in the way only big sisters can, death prison of embaressment from wich none can escape.]


{♥️BunnySkullBoy♥️} (LollibombLee) Gemini ≧ω≦ wrote: "


Karkat! The solution to your troubles!"


Ok, I found that way to funny... XD [still hugging Karklekins]


message 46: by GinAndCats (new)

GinAndCats | 971 comments Karkat, do you have a favorite human or do you hate everything that talks?


message 47: by [deleted user] (new)

Oy Karkat, are you mad because your horns are small, or because you're a pointless being who acts like he's more complex than everything else?


message 48: by kuseyo (new)

kuseyo @Gemini:
@Lime:
@Feels:

EVERYONE CAN GO POINT THEIR PROBING BUSYBODY SNIFFNODES UP THEIR OWN IMPERTINENT SEED FLAPS


{♥️BunnySkullBoy♥️} (LollibombLee) [only hugs Karkat tighter] :3


message 50: by GinAndCats (new)

GinAndCats | 971 comments THIS IS WHY PEOPLE DONT SPEND TIME WIH YOU!


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