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Archives (Through 29/10/14) > Depression Venting

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message 1: by [deleted user] (new)

Post here when your feeling depressed and lonely. (Possibly even suicidal. If you are suicidal when you post here, PLZ DONT DO IT! WE CARE ABOUT YOU!!!)


message 2: by Lucy (last edited Oct 04, 2012 01:57AM) (new)

Lucy (VintageQueen) I was struggling through depression 'cause I was bullied quite badly. Let's just say, I was starting to question living life. Really the only thing that kept from considering suicide was that 'Why should I have to die because of them?' I wanted to live. In the end, I just said 'What else have I got to lose?'. I didn't like being depressed and wouldn't wish it on anyone.

To those who are still struggling with depression, just be yourself, be true to yourself, stay strong. Crying doesn't mean you're weak, it simple means that you are human, and sometimes we need a good cry to help us. Let it all out, don't keep it lock away, because it continues to build up and soon you won't be able to handle the emotions and you don't want to know what happens when you can't control the overload of emotions.
Cry if you need too and let it all out. It helps. Speaking from personal experience, it is better to let it out then keep it locked away inside yourself. I cried for a full day, it is okay to cry, and it is NOT showing weakness.

Don't let other people define you. You are who you are, so embrace it, and live life to its fullest because you only get once chance at it. One time to make things right. Why live life when it is only half-lived or sad? What is the point of it then?

For those being bullied at school, think about life being (stretch your arms out wide) this big okay? School is only a centimetre of that. You see? You've got your whole life ahead of you. School is only a small portion of that. You will find your friends for life not in school but during this time. School kids are bullies and rude and simply, you don't really want them as your friends. Be strong! Don't ever EVER think anything less of yourself or believe how or what others define you as.

If you can't cry or talk to someone to let your emotions out then write a diary. Seriously, it works. Day by day, write down what happens, how you feel, people's names if they be mean to you. Instead of crying you are putting your emotions on paper. Letting them escape. I feel I have more true friends online than I do in reality. I've been down that bad and bumpy road. But seriously, start writing a diary. I currently writing a book about my life of being bullied. I will get it published and I can't wait to see their faces when they see that they're in it!

I was invisible, still am really, but you have to just not care what others think, and slowly, yes, I admit and am telling the truth, it goes slowly, but soon people will start to see YOU for who YOU are, and those are the true friends, who will be there for you for life.

It is NEVER too late to turns things around in your life. YOU are the master of YOU. Don't let people make you a puppet, pulling your strings. If you believe in yourself then you will be able to walk without those strings.

I hope this gives some insight on things, and helps. I've experienced a lot of bad things through bullying in my life, so if you need to ask anything, please, feel free to ask me, and I'll be honoured to help in every way I can.

To everyone out there, whether or not you are being bullied. Just because you may be sad, doesn't mean everyone else has to be. Smile and wave at someone. It makes their day, trust me. Doing a simple thing like saying 'hi' to someone really does go a long way. It means more to the person than you think it does. It helps them have hope. Because without hope, there is nothing to live for.

P.S. So sorry this comment was so long!


message 3: by Keira (new)

Keira Rush (ArtsyKR) | 8 comments I don't know if this will help but I am a mom and one of five siblings. I know what to is like to get bullied at school and then come home and get worse treatment. I may be able to give you some advice from both experiencing what you are going through and being a parent.
First, parents forget how hard adolescence is with working and have financial responsibilities. I would NEVER want to be between the ages 13-16 again. It stinks. You have no control and very little understanding from the people around you. Then to add insult to injury your hormones are out of whack and your frontal lobe isn't fully developed. So, maybe reminding them would help. Mind you, approach this tactfully, because it can come off as defensive and accusing otherwise.
Kindness if your greatest weapon. Kill them with kindness. There isn't much your mom or Dad can do if you are just being nice to them. Example: In the morning you say she just glares at you and says nothing. So why don't you say good morning, ask how she slept and see if she wants any help making breakfast? She may get defensive in the beginning but if you are consistent her attitude may change. Remember this behavior is not going to change over night. It was thirteen years in the making just be diligent.
This one is the hard one: your sister is you greatest ally if you let her be. I truly understand not getting along with siblings. I have three other sisters and one brother. My sister Sandy (oldest) used to get the others to gang up on my when I would come home from school. But you know what? They got older and realized how awful Sandy can be. Your sister in turn will get older and have conflict with you parents. If you start working on your relationship now you will have a great friend and someone to have your back.
My question to you is this: Do you want this to change? Because you may not know it but you have the power to change it. It will take a while and will not be perfect but things can change. Also, when you become comfortable try talking to them about this. Or write them a letter if you have trouble speaking to them directly. You may be surprised with what they say. I really hope this helps and that things get better for you.


SEMI PRECIOUS JADE (WingsofFreedom) | 31 comments Oh my gosh... I'm reading through all this and my eyes are watering!! I wanna give you all a hug! *hugs everyone*. It says listen or let it all out.... I suppose I'm listening then... Okay sorry for that random cut in I'll just....


message 5: by Cait Sith (new)

Cait Sith Fairy (WillowKeeper) | 633 comments ((Sarah, children of the corn, pwease?))


message 6: by Lucy (new)

Lucy (VintageQueen) ((okay))


message 7: by Lucy (new)

Lucy (VintageQueen) ((where?))


message 9: by Geneva (new)

Geneva (FireDragon1) | 47 comments here's a happy picture for you all:
http://images2.fanpop.com/image/photo...


message 10: by Keira (new)

Keira Rush (ArtsyKR) | 8 comments That's really cute :)


message 11: by Geneva (new)

Geneva (FireDragon1) | 47 comments thanks. :) hope you have a happy day, all of you!


☯ ƒ ι η η у  ☯ Okay,so ever since i found out that my bestfriend was talking about me behind my back,ive felt horrible about myself.She said horrible things to me,and i felt worse when she told me that what i heard was true.She called me a fucking lesbian faggot(im bisexual) and she said that i was annoying,clingy,a whore,and that trying to hard.I know that i shouldnt listen to her,but its been picking at me for a long time now.I hate myself more than i ever did,and everytime i look at myself in the mirror all i see is someone who i dont want to be.My ex-boyfriend is constantly trying to make my life horrible by getting his friends to say stuff to me or saying them to me to my face.I honestly feel like i have no purpose in this world,like everyone who i held close and dear to me has stabbed me in the heart mulitple times.and i feel like what they say is true,because they all say the same things.


ϮAʛʛⅇℛʊℵʛ {Supernatural Freak} (Taggerung) | 33 comments It is NOT true! You are a wonderful person worthy of love, you have a purpose and worth, and don't let anyone tell you differently! I haven't even met you and I care about you! No one should ever be made to feel the way you feel and be treated like that! That's wrong! *gives hug* things will get better, just take each day reminding yourself that what other people think doesnt matter unless it's making you happy. :)


message 14: by Geneva (new)

Geneva (FireDragon1) | 47 comments what!? how can people treat each other like that? I haven't experienced something quite like that cuz none of my friends have betrayed me (and they never will, hopefully :D)but I have been hurt badly before like that. The worse thing it does is tear away your defenses so you're left to wonder: "I am really like that?". When that happened to me, I was helped by friends who would tell me about my redeeming qualities. Do you have any other friends?


☯ ƒ ι η η у  ☯ Geneva wrote: "what!? how can people treat each other like that? I haven't experienced something quite like that cuz none of my friends have betrayed me (and they never will, hopefully :D)but I have been hurt bad..."

Yes I do,but the ones I felt that were close are slowly drifting away.and my closest friend doesn't quite understand.she says things that she feels like will help me but they don't since it reminds me that all those compliments arent any help.im still what I am and it doesn't change how I feel about myself.


message 16: by Geneva (new)

Geneva (FireDragon1) | 47 comments ooh. a bit worse then. Well, I'll say this: There will always be people who pretend to be your friend but are really there to tear you apart. Same as there will always be people being mean to each other. Even though this is happening, don't let yourself become a causality on the battleground. You are the only you. No one can replace you and when they try, it's because they don't like the light that inside of you.


☯ ƒ ι η η у  ☯ It's just so hard you know.i never wanted any of this to happen,and i feel like all this time I've been trampled on until I can no longer function without feeling pain.without feeling like this.everyone thinks that I'm just some normal girl that's happy,someone who hasnt experienced something painful,but I feel that no one has really ever known what hides behind that persona.i feel like no one will fully understand how I feel,and I feel like everyone hates me.for whatever reason,I feel like they do.and it's so difficult for me to sum up everything I feel because everything is so difficult for me to comprehend too.


message 18: by kuseyo (new)

kuseyo I'm depressed, yes. Though my friends don't know, neither my parents, or SOME people on GR. It's because I act all happy and what not. I wasn't so depressed a couple of days ago, but I started sinking into it again. My astrology sign is a Cancer so I'm kinda moody, (more like always. Sometimes I waked up and feel angry or sad) and often shift in and out between my emotions. I space out in school, since some of the subjects don't interest me anymore, I cry for no reason sometimes. I don't even know when I even started becoming depressed. I know stress is one. It's some other things, but I don't know what they are.


message 19: by Geneva (new)

Geneva (FireDragon1) | 47 comments interesting. my sign is Virgo. organized, thinking things out clearly...that's supposed to be me.


message 20: by [deleted user] (new)

u r. u organized our games before i even got there and there is no way i could have made them work on my own.


message 21: by kuseyo (new)

kuseyo Just came back from a high school fair and there is no particular school that I'm proud/fond of or that is super close to my place. WHAT IF I END UP WITH NO SCHOOL!

THEN I HAVE TO MOVE AND STUFF

AND.

AND. D:

GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH


message 22: by [deleted user] (new)

Okai I'm a little I guess depressed. Duh, that's why I'm commenting on this topic :P I'm silly. Okai anyway! I guess I have a Skype and everyone else is having these conversations and then there's me who is left out and when I finally get a call I hear "Oh shit! Get Katie out!," So yea I guess I'm a little sad. But oh well someone will eventually talk to me :) Another thing is I guess my dad. He's not the nicest of people. He loves my brother who does everything to his bidding. Then there's me. The one with her computer and violin. Doing nothing except reading and talking to her dear friends who she loves very much and couldn't live without. He called me fat, whore, lazy, stupid. I didn't think I could feel so hurt. But it gets worse. Physical. But I'm alone and don't know what to do about any of it. :/


message 23: by ✽Laurenj426✽ (new)

✽Laurenj426✽ (Purplepandy) Rose Lalonde wrote: "Okai I'm a little I guess depressed. Duh, that's why I'm commenting on this topic :P I'm silly. Okai anyway! I guess I have a Skype and everyone else is having these conversations and then there's ..."

what? I'm so sorry, I can't relate really, but it sounds awful.


message 24: by Stardust Kitty (new)

Stardust Kitty (StardustKitty) | 5 comments hi Rose, you are not alone, we are listening to you, we care, I care, I have been through the little brother being the apple of daddies eyes, I have been there crying myself to sleep over things dad said to me, you will find strength in your self, you are bigger than him, you are a better person than him, always remember he may be your dad, but you are your own person, he may have brought you into this world, but your life is your own, .. its taken me 32 yrs to understand this, if things getting bad and you need to talk, there are helplines, but I hope I can lend a ear for you here :) take care Rose x


message 25: by [deleted user] (new)

Oh my god you guys are so nice :) It's not as bad as it sounds or probably as I make it sounds really, but it still hurts a lot. I don't like computers. I can't hug people through them XD Sharon, you're probably right and I think if I have a little more confidence that those things can't bother me much :) I'm sure there will be ups and downs for all of us. Thank you so much :)


message 26: by Stardust Kitty (last edited Oct 13, 2012 02:52PM) (new)

Stardust Kitty (StardustKitty) | 5 comments Rose, I won't repeat the names he called you, these words are not acceptable, do not think they are acceptable, .. keep positive - things will get better :) thanks for your hugs :) made me smile ((hugs Rose back))


Sariah the Authoress (authoress96pulchritudinous) | 25 comments AllI know is that you can't leave us. You can't.


Sariah the Authoress (authoress96pulchritudinous) | 25 comments You probably haven't heard of Jessica Ridgeway. She was a sweet ten-year-old girl who went missing in Westminster. A few days later they found her body. The entire nation, beyond the nation (there was a headline in London), is devestated. I've cried hard. Don't be Jessica on purpose.


message 29: by JazzyCat (new)

JazzyCat (dayandnightgirl) Depression is one of those things that you think has finally left and then it hits you and you can't breathe and you realize it's not over. It sits in the back of your head, always there, no matter what. I've been depressed for almost a year now. It's gotten a lot better, but it still hurts so much.


message 30: by Cait Sith (new)

Cait Sith Fairy (WillowKeeper) | 633 comments marisa yelled at me. i don't even know what i did.


message 31: by Geneva (new)

Geneva (FireDragon1) | 47 comments what was it about?


message 32: by Cait Sith (new)

Cait Sith Fairy (WillowKeeper) | 633 comments I don't know, all she said was that I ruined her and she will never forgive me.


message 33: by JazzyCat (new)

JazzyCat (dayandnightgirl) I have a project due, and we're not done, and I have an F in the class.... if I don't do good my parents will see my final grade, and I'll be so full of shame... ;_;


GlitchObsession-Eridan's Matesprit (DontlaughIknowwhereyoulive) Oh I totallty know. I'm being homeschooled because of my resistence to do my work. I doubt it will get that far 4 U cuz I had three years to decide my fate.


message 35: by [deleted user] (new)

Jasny the CatWolf :P wrote: "I have a project due, and we're not done, and I have an F in the class.... if I don't do good my parents will see my final grade, and I'll be so full of shame... ;_;"

*hug* its ok. work hard, get the project done. if u have to, talk to ur teacher. explain ur doing ur best and tht u rlly need this grade. ask 4 extra credit. work hard. ull make it. ik u will.


message 36: by Cait Sith (new)

Cait Sith Fairy (WillowKeeper) | 633 comments she says im the incarnation of the devil


message 37: by [deleted user] (last edited Apr 27, 2014 09:16PM) (new)

Johnny ~Isaac~ wrote: "she says im the incarnation of the devil"

*hug* u rnt. u r one of the nicest guys ik.


message 38: by Cait Sith (new)

Cait Sith Fairy (WillowKeeper) | 633 comments :) thanks


message 39: by Cait Sith (new)

Cait Sith Fairy (WillowKeeper) | 633 comments here is the full message that she sent me,

"You ruined me!!! You took Jada and turned her against me! You turned everyone against me!!! Can't you just grow up and 19!!!! You are 19 right? You aren't just a delusional six year old? Because that's how you act! I don't care if you think you're the son if a god, you are the INCARNATION OF THE DEVIL!!!!! It's because of you that I want to die!!! I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU AND I DON'T CARE OF YOU EVER FORGIVE ME!!!!! JUST DON'T MENTION ME!!!!! YOU ARE SPREADING LIES ABOUT ME!!!!!!!!!! LEAVE ME OUT OF YOUR DELUSIONS!!!!!!!!!!!"


message 40: by [deleted user] (last edited Apr 27, 2014 09:16PM) (new)

Johnny ~Isaac~ wrote: "here is the full message that she sent me,

"You ruined me!!! You took Jada and turned her against me! You turned everyone against me!!! Can't you just grow up and 19!!!! You are 19 right? You aren..."


o johnny. im so sry. wow. shes wrong. give her time. shell realize her mistake. im guessing she was a close friend? im so sorry johnny. u rlly dont deserve this.


message 41: by [deleted user] (new)

Johnny ~Isaac~ wrote: ":) thanks"

np. :) i gtg soon, idk when tho


message 42: by Cait Sith (new)

Cait Sith Fairy (WillowKeeper) | 633 comments Cici *its impossible to prove a lie* wrote: "Johnny ~Isaac~ wrote: "here is the full message that she sent me,

"You ruined me!!! You took Jada and turned her against me! You turned everyone against me!!! Can't you just grow up and 19!!!! You..."


:)


message 43: by Cait Sith (new)

Cait Sith Fairy (WillowKeeper) | 633 comments i g2g


message 44: by [deleted user] (new)

Johnny ~Isaac~ wrote: "i g2g"

bye


message 45: by [deleted user] (new)

Johnny ~Isaac~ wrote: "Cici *its impossible to prove a lie* wrote: "Johnny ~Isaac~ wrote: "here is the full message that she sent me,

"You ruined me!!! You took Jada and turned her against me! You turned everyone agains..."


*hug* as one of my friends says "forgive but nvr forget". :) ill always be here 4 u


message 46: by Cait Sith (new)

Cait Sith Fairy (WillowKeeper) | 633 comments Thank you


message 47: by [deleted user] (new)

np johnny ol' pal


message 48: by JazzyCat (new)

JazzyCat (dayandnightgirl) Cici *its impossible to prove a lie* wrote: "Jasny the CatWolf :P wrote: "I have a project due, and we're not done, and I have an F in the class.... if I don't do good my parents will see my final grade, and I'll be so full of shame... ;_;"

..."


*hug back* Thank you. :) I talked to my dad last night, and he's gonna help me.


message 49: by Savannah (new)

Savannah (Savannah98) | 85 comments Johnny ~Isaac~ wrote: "There are three little letters that may help you

C
P
S"

yeah they do help! A lot!


message 50: by Cinderglacier the Universal (last edited Oct 29, 2012 02:09PM) (new)

Cinderglacier the Universal (432hz528hzFelShadowraven) | 9 comments The night i wrote this, i Felt alone, Unique in a bad way, As if no one had the knowledge i did. I feel as if my only purpose is to do good, Not good for myself, but to help others, even at the cost of my life. Despite being treated like a God here in my home with the kindness given to me, I see myself as some kind of.. Aura mimicker? I don't know.. Am i going Berserk? Insane?

I can't exactly put what i feel into detailed Descriptions.. But.. I live off of the good of others, The Bad events happening to others are my bane, my poison, my weakness. I feed off of the good of others constantly like a famished Vampire to make myself happy, to try and live Happily. It's as if i am the embodiment of evil trying to escape it's Darker side.

The chaos happening in the world.. The Constant Murder and suicide without a second thought.. The Deaths of my family's three cats.. i don't think i could bear to witness a fourth.

Many have committed suicide because of many things, sometimes this kind of mental chaos, I fear i may join them in the other reality if i do not find my purpose, i want to do something major.. But my "Age" Is Law to the human race, And that, i find stupid.

The more kindness im given, the more i want to live off of.. the more i want to feed off of.. it slowly ascends with time. I only feel good when others feel good, it is rare if the situation is otherwise.

I don't know if im Rampant, Over-empathic, Self-conflicting, Suicidal, Stayed at home for too long, Or a combination of the five.

But if a great miracle or chance to fight a universal threat doesn't come to pass soon..

I may eventually succumb.

(If you wish to talk to me about this, Here are ways you can get to me while im still here on the physical reality with you all: "Ascendingink14" is my Xbox 360 Gamertag, "Vaul"/Darrien" are my star trek online characters, i'd prefer not to talk about it on goodreads unless you really want to.)

-What's currently happening to me right now, and has pestered me in the past days, maybe even a month, this is also visible in my profile.


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