City of Bones
discussion
Best Quotes In The Mortal Instruments/Infernal Devices Series
message 1:
by
xXForever_LoveXx
(new)
-
rated it 5 stars
Sep 14, 2012 07:43PM
What do you think are the best quotes in the Mortal Instruments/Infernal Devices series. They can be from anyone. Just thought this might be a laugh
reply
|
flag
*
“Demon pox, oh demon poxJust how is it acquired?
One must go down to the bad part of town
Until one is very tired.
Demon pox, oh demon pox, I had it all along—
Not the pox, you foolish blocks,
I mean this very song—
For I was right, and you were wrong!"
"Will!" Charlotte shouted over the noise, "Have you LOST YOUR MIND? CEASE THAT INFERNAL RACKET! Jem—"
Jem, rising to his feet, clapped his hands over Will's mouth. "Do you promise to be quiet?" he hissed into his friend's ear.
Will nodded, blue eyes blazing. Tessa was staring at him in amazement; they all were. She had seen Will many things—amused, bitter, condescending, angry, pitying—but never giddy before.
Jem let him go. "All right, then."
Will slid to the floor, his back against the armchair, and threw up his arms. "A demon pox on all your houses!" he announced, and yawned.
"Oh, God, weeks of pox jokes," said Jem. "We're in for it now.”
and...
“Astriola. That IS demon pox. You had evidence that demon pox existed and you didnt mention it to me! Et tu, Brute!' He rolled up the paper and hit Jem over the head with it.”
“Mom. I have something to tell you. I’m undead. Now, I know you may have some preconceived notions about the undead. I know you may not be comfortable with the idea of me being undead. But I’m here to tell you that undead are just like you and me … well, okay. Possibly more like me than you.”
“Have you fallen in love with the wrong person yet?'Jace said, "Unfortunately, Lady of the Haven, my one true love remains myself."
..."At least," she said, "you don't have to worry about rejection, Jace Wayland."
"Not necessarily. I turn myself down occasionally, just to keep it interesting.”
I love jace. God he SO is funny !!
OMG these are really good ones.This is my favourite:
Malachi scowled. "I don't remember the Clave inviting you into the Glass City, Magnus Bane."
"They didn't," Magnus said. "Your wards are down."
"Really?" the Consul's voice dripped sarcasm. "I hadn't noticed."
Magnus looked concerned. "That's terrible. Someone should have told you." He glanced at Luke. "Tell him the wards are down.”
Haha priceless. I fell off my chair from laughing so hard
“If you were half as funny as you think you are, you'd be twice as funny as you are now.” "I am a man and men do not consume pink beverages. Get thee gone woman and bring me something brown."
“You could have had anything else in the world, and you asked for me."She smiled up at him. Filthy as he was, covered in blood and dirt, he was the most beautiful thing she'd ever seen.
"But I don't want anything else in the world.”
Gabby wrote: "“Demon pox, oh demon poxJust how is it acquired?
One must go down to the bad part of town
Until one is very tired.
Demon pox, oh demon pox, I had it all along—
Not the pox, you foolish blocks,
I m..."
That was a really good quote made me laugh
Shweta wrote: "Gabby wrote: "“Demon pox, oh demon poxJust how is it acquired?
One must go down to the bad part of town
Until one is very tired.
Demon pox, oh demon pox, I had it all along—
Not the pox, you fooli..."
I know, i fell off my bed :)
Miss_holly wrote: "OMG these are really good ones.This is my favourite:
Malachi scowled. "I don't remember the Clave inviting you into the Glass City, Magnus Bane."
"They didn't," Magnus said. "Your wards are down...."
I love this one! : )
My favorite is...... NEVER TRUST A DUCK! : )Did you just kiss me? Magnus made a slip second decision. No he said
.....
She looked at him ducks? I always hated ducks don't know why I just always have.
Let me give you a piece of advice the handsome young fellow trying to save you from a horrible fate is never wrong not even if he says the sky is purple and made of hedgehogs.
I love you Jace said with absolute clarity. I will love you until I die and if there is a life after that I'll love you then.
I'll have to befriend. Jessamine. Jessamine cant stand you. Henry then. Henry will set you on fire.
Oh my goodness my noes is huge why didn't anyone tell me?
Hey! I know you you bit me. What kind of monster could possibly hate chocolate?
“So when the moon's only partly full, you only feel a little wolfy?""You could say that."
"Well, you can go ahead and hang your head out the car window if you feel like it."
"I'm a werewolf, not a golden retriever.”
AND
“You see, cuckoos are parasites. They lay their eggs in other birds' nests. When the egg hatches, the baby cuckoo pushes the other baby birds out of the nest. The poor parent birds work themselves to death trying to find enough food to feed the enormous cuckoo child who has murdered their babies and taken their places."
"Enormous?" said Jace. "Did you just call me fat?"
"It was an analogy."
"I am not fat.”
LOVE THESE!!!
CITY OF HEAVENLY FIRE QUOTE!!!!!“Alec looked down at the shattered pieces in disbelief. “You BROKE my PHONE.”
Jace shrugged. “Guys don’t let other guys keep calling other guys. Okay, that came out wrong. Friends don’t let friends keep calling their exes and hanging up. Seriously. You have to stop.”
Alec looked furious. “So you broke my brand new phone? Thanks a lot.”
Jace smiled serenely and lay back on the grass. “You’re welcome.”
"Have you tried talking to her?""No," Jace said, "we've been punching her repeatedly in the face instead. Why, do you think that won't work?"
City of Glass
Everything that comes out of Magnus's mouth
Gabby wrote: "CITY OF HEAVENLY FIRE QUOTE!!!!!“Alec looked down at the shattered pieces in disbelief. “You BROKE my PHONE.”
Jace shrugged. “Guys don’t let other guys keep calling other guys. Okay, that came ou..."
Jace is back!!!!! : )
"Well, I'm not kissing the mundane,' said Jace. 'I'd rather stay down here and rot.''Forever? Said Simon. 'Forever's and awfully longtime.'
Jace raised his eyebrows. 'I knew it,' he said. 'You want to kiss me, don't you?'
"'Look, Simon, Luke thinks you should tell your mom. You can't hide it from her forever."
"I can damn well try."
Think about Luke," she said desprately. "You can still live a normal life."
"And what about us? Do you want a vampire boyfriend?" He laught betterly.
Because I foresee many romantic picnics in our furture. You, drinking a virgin pina colada. Me, dinking the blood of a virgin'"
and
Mimi wrote: "Everything that comes out of Magnus's mouth"I second that :)
Simon:That's why when major badasses greet each other in movies, they don't say anything, they just nod. The nod means, 'I' am a badass, and I recognize that you, too, are a badass,' but they don't say anything because they're Wolverine and Magneto and it would mess up their vibe to explain
"...in fact, don't touch any of my weapons without my permission.'"Well, there goes my plan for selling them all on ebay," Clary muttered.
"Selling them on what?"
Clary smiled blandly at him, "A mythical place of great magical power."
keep finding more
Jace: Do you remember back at the hotel when you promised that if we lived, you'd get dressed up in a nurse's outfit and give me a sponge bath?Clary: It was Simon who promised you the sponge bath.
Simon: As soon as I'm back on my feet, handsome.
Jace: I knew we should have left you a rat.
More City of Heavenly Fire Quotes!! (No spoilers)“We shouldn’t,” protested Isabelle. “The Clave has a plan.”
“The Clave has the collective intelligence of a pineapple,” said Jace.
Alec blinked up at them. “Jace is right.”
Isabelle turned on her brother. “What do you know? You weren’t even paying attention.”
“I was,” Alec said, injured. “I said Jace was right.”
“Yeah, but there’s like a 90% chance of me being right most of the time, so that’s not proof you were listening,” said Jace. “That’s just a good guess.”
_________________
“Magnus rolled onto his back and put his feet up on the arm of the sofa. “What do you care if Alec’s miserable?”
“What do I care?” Jace said, so loudly that Chairman Meow rolled off the couch and landed on the floor. “Of course I care about Alec; he’s my best friend, my parabatai. And he’s unhappy. And so are you, by the look of things. Takeout containers everywhere, you haven’t done anything to fix up the place, your cat looks dead —“
“He’s not dead.”
She heard a squeak, and the rat's pink nose poked out from beneath the bar. With an exclamation of relief, Clary seized the rat in her hands. "Simon! You understood me!"The rat, huddled in the hollow of her palms, squeaked glumly. Delighted, she hugged him to her chest. "Oh, poor baby," she crooned, almost as if he really were a pet. "Poor Simon, it'll be fine, I promise-"
"I wouldn't feel too sorry for him," Jace said. "That's probably the closest he's ever gotten to second base."
These are so good.I like some stuff that Jace says.(not the stuff when he keeps saying that he should die or that he is a monster, it's annoying but I love him)
Everything Magnus says.
Everything Simon says.(I LOVE LOVE LOVE SIMON)
Jasmine wrote: "Simon:That's why when major badasses greet each other in movies, they don't say anything, they just nod. The nod means, 'I' am a badass, and I recognize that you, too, are a badass,' but they don'..."
Thank God someone mentioned this, I was worried for a minute I was the only one who found that funny :)
INFERNAL DEVICES - "Is this a game? We just blurt out whatever word comes next to mind? In that case mine's "genuphobia". It means an unreasonable fear of knees."
"What's the perfectly reasonable fear of annoying idiots?"
lol when I read this I was just like "Oh! You just got OWNED, Will!
Will looked horrified. "What kind of monster could possibly hate chocolate?"
Amen, Will. I feel your pain.
MORTAL INSTRUMENTS -
Out of the corner of her eye she thought she saw Jace shoot her a look of white rage - but when she glanced at him, he looked as he always did: easy, confident, slightly bored.
"In future, Clarissa," he said, "it might be wise to mention that you already have a man in your bed, to avoid such tedious situations.
"You invited him to bed? Simon demanded, looking shaken.
"Ridiculous, isn't it?" said Jace. "We would never have all fit."
"I didn't invite him to bed," Clary snapped, "we were just kissing."
"Just kissing?" Jace's tone mocked her with it's false hurt. "How swiftly you dismiss our love."
I think I wanted to hit Jace, then and there, for that >:(
Any more?
I'm pure at heart... it repels the dirt.
THERE ARE SO MANY AMAZING QUOTES BUT THESE ARE JUST A COUPLE OF MY FAVORITES!
Don't order any of the faerie food," said Jace, looking at her over the top of his menu. "It tends to make humans a little crazy. One minute you're munching a faerie plum, the next minute you're running naked down Madison Avenue with antlers on your head. Not," he added hastily, "that this has ever happened to me.”
“Declarations of love amuse me. Especially when unrequited.”
“Don't stop there. I suppose there are also, what, vampires and werewolves and zombies?"
"Of course there are. Although you mostly find zombies farther south, where the voudun priests are."
"What about mummies? Do they only hang around Egypt?"
"Don't be ridiculous. No one believes in mummies.”
“What are all these?" Clary asked.
"Vials of holy water, blessed knives, steel and silver blades," Jace said, piling the weapons on the floor beside him, "electrum wire - not much use at the moment but it's always good to have spares - silver bullets, charms of protetion, crucifixes, stars of David-"
"Jesus," said Clary
"I doubt he'd fit."
"Jace." Clary was appalled.”
Where there is love, there is often also hate. They can exist side by side.
“Jesus!" Luke exclaimed.
"Actually, it's just me," said Simon. "Although I've been told the resemblance is startling.”
Don't order any of the faerie food," said Jace, looking at her over the top of his menu. "It tends to make humans a little crazy. One minute you're munching a faerie plum, the next minute you're running naked down Madison Avenue with antlers on your head. Not," he added hastily, "that this has ever happened to me.”
“Declarations of love amuse me. Especially when unrequited.”
“Don't stop there. I suppose there are also, what, vampires and werewolves and zombies?"
"Of course there are. Although you mostly find zombies farther south, where the voudun priests are."
"What about mummies? Do they only hang around Egypt?"
"Don't be ridiculous. No one believes in mummies.”
“What are all these?" Clary asked.
"Vials of holy water, blessed knives, steel and silver blades," Jace said, piling the weapons on the floor beside him, "electrum wire - not much use at the moment but it's always good to have spares - silver bullets, charms of protetion, crucifixes, stars of David-"
"Jesus," said Clary
"I doubt he'd fit."
"Jace." Clary was appalled.”
Where there is love, there is often also hate. They can exist side by side.
“Jesus!" Luke exclaimed.
"Actually, it's just me," said Simon. "Although I've been told the resemblance is startling.”
“I don't want to be a man," said Jace. "I want to be an angst-ridden teenager who can't confront his own inner demons and takes it out verbally on other people instead.""Well," said Luke, "you're doing a fantastic job.”
My favorite is "There's no pretending," said Jace. "I love you, i'll love you until I die and if there is life after that I'll love you even then."
From City of glass.
“Is this the part where you start tearing off strips of your shirt to bind my wounds?"
"If you wanted me to rip my clothes off, you should have just asked.”
"If you wanted me to rip my clothes off, you should have just asked.”
“Malachi scowled. "I don't remember the Clave inviting you into the Glass City, Magnus Bane."
"They didn't," Magnus said. "Your wards are down."
"Really?" the Consul's voice dripped sarcasm. "I hadn't noticed."
Magnus looked concerned. "That's terrible. Someone should have told you." He glanced at Luke. "Tell him the wards are down.”
"They didn't," Magnus said. "Your wards are down."
"Really?" the Consul's voice dripped sarcasm. "I hadn't noticed."
Magnus looked concerned. "That's terrible. Someone should have told you." He glanced at Luke. "Tell him the wards are down.”
"Actually, I like to think that I'm a liar in a way that's uniquely my own"- Jace ;)
There are sooooo many that I love. These two series have some of the funniest quotes and lines in my opinion. Here are a few of my favorites:Well, I’m not kissing the mundane," said Jace. "I’d rather stay down here and rot."
"Forever?" said Simon. "Forever’s an awfully long time."
Jace raised his eyebrows. "I knew it," he said. "You want to kiss me, don’t you?”
It means 'Shadowhunters: Looking Better in Black Than the Widows of our Enemies Since 1234'.
“Is this the part where you say if I hurt her, you'll kill me?"
"No" Simon said, "If you hurt Clary she's quite capable of killing you herself. Possibly with a variety of weapons.”
“Investigation?" Isabelle laughed. "Now we're detectives? Maybe we should all have code names."
"Good idea," said Jace. "I shall be Baron Hotschaft Von Hugenstein.”
You guessed? You must have been pretty sure, considering you could have killed me."
"I was ninety percent sure."
"I see," Clary said. There must have been something in her voice, because he turned to look at her. Her hand cracked across his face, a slap that rocked him back on his heels. He put his hands on his cheek, more in surprise than pain.
"What the hell was that for?"
"The other ten percent.”
“Remember when you tried to convince me to feed a poultry pie to the mallards in the park to see if you could breed a race of cannibal ducks?"
"They ate it too," Will reminisced. "Bloodthirsty little beasts. Never trust a duck.”
“I thought I'd lie on the floor and writhe in pain for a while," he grunted, "It relaxes me."
"It does? Oh - you're being sarcastic. That's a good sign probably.”
“They’re not hideous,” said Tessa.
Will blinked at her. “What?”
“Gideon and Gabriel,” said Tessa. “They’re really quite good-looking, not hideous at all.”
“I spoke,” said Will, in sepulchral tones, “of the pitch-black inner depths of their souls.”
Tessa snorted. “And what color do you suppose the inner depths of your soul are, Will Herondale?”
“Mauve,” said Will.”
If you're texting Magnus to say 'I think u r kewl,' I'm going to kill you."
"Who's Magnus?" Max inquired.
"He's a warlock," said Alec.
"A sexy, sexy warlock," Isabelle told Max, ignoring Alec's look of total fury.
"But warlocks are bad," protested Max, looking baffled.
"Exactly," said Isabelle.”
Okay maybe that was more than a few, but honestly how can I choose from soo many? I love pretty much everything Will, Jace and Clary, and Magnus says.
Gabby wrote: "CITY OF HEAVENLY FIRE QUOTE!!!!!“Alec looked down at the shattered pieces in disbelief. “You BROKE my PHONE.”
Jace shrugged. “Guys don’t let other guys keep calling other guys. Okay, that came ou..."
where did you find that?
Sarah wrote: "Gabby wrote: "CITY OF HEAVENLY FIRE QUOTE!!!!!“Alec looked down at the shattered pieces in disbelief. “You BROKE my PHONE.”
Jace shrugged. “Guys don’t let other guys keep calling other guys. Okay..."
In the goodreads quotes and then type in City of Heavenly Fire, there's a heap of them!! (Cassie released them as teasers)
just kissing? how quickly you dismiss our love :PP
"Basia Coquum," Simon said. "Or whatever their motto is." "It's 'DescensusAver no facilis Est.' "The descent into hell is easy," said Alec. " You just said "Kiss the cook." "Dammit," said Simon. "I knew Jace was screwing with me."
-City of Lost Souls
Amy wrote: "Jasmine wrote: "Simon:That's why when major badasses greet each other in movies, they don't say anything, they just nod. The nod means, 'I' am a badass, and I recognize that you, too, are a badass..."
That is one of my many favourite simon quotes I think he's so funny.
deleted user wrote: "THERE ARE SO MANY AMAZING QUOTES BUT THESE ARE JUST A COUPLE OF MY FAVORITES!Don't order any of the faerie food," said Jace, looking at her over the top of his menu. "It tends to make humans a li..."
I love those quotes too.
I thought that I would translate one of Jace's quotes into Latin on Google translate just for fun.It means 'Shadowhunters: Looking Better in Black Than the Widows of our Enemies Since 1234'.
Shadowhunters: Vultus melius in Niger quam viduis MCCXXXIV Cum inimici nostri.
I Love Google Translate.
Terryann wrote: "My favorite is "There's no pretending," said Jace. "I love you, i'll love you until I die and if there is life after that I'll love you even then."
From City of glass."
Oh my god. my heart just broke. in a sick good way haha
"You could dress it up with a sequined headband," Magnus suggested, offering his boyfriend something blue and sparkly. "Just a thought.""Resist the urge, Alec."..."you'll look like Olivia newton John in Xanadu." (Simon)
"There are worse things." Magnus observed.
Mimi ❤ wrote: "Everything that comes out of Magnus's mouth"Yesss
Gabby wrote: "“Demon pox, oh demon poxJust how is it acquired?
One must go down to the bad part of town
Until one is very tired.
Demon pox, oh demon pox, I had it all along—
Not the pox, you foolish blocks,
I m..."
i do believe this one is the best quote
Hannah wrote: "Mimi ❤ wrote: "Everything that comes out of Magnus's mouth"Yesss"
true<3
There are so many!!!"I really wish you hadn't worn that sweater."
Jace to Clary ...
"It's good practise for you. Tomorrow, Fishnets."
Clary answering Jace, City of Lost Souls
"I'm from New Jersey. I was born in toxic sludge."
Maia to Clary, City of Ashes
"I doubt you've ever given anything to anyone. Except maybe nightmares."
Clary to Valentine, City of Ashes
Infernal devices
"Goodness. If you keep seeing six-fingered Nigel like this, he'll expect you to declare your intentions."
Clockwork Angel--Tessa to Will
+Anything that Isabelle says or Magnus says. And Valentine can sound rather amusing too. I picked the ones that made me fall off my bed onto my face laughing...not exaggerating.
Mimi ❤ wrote: "Everything that comes out of Magnus's mouth"YES!!!!!
all discussions on this book |
post a new topic
