Paxnirvana's Reviews > Red Mars

Red Mars by Kim Stanley Robinson
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's review
Oct 17, 2007

did not like it
bookshelves: why-oh-why-did-i-read-it

Instead of re-hashing my own old review (did one at Amazon already yanno), let me offer up this BRILLIANT routine about Jaws 4: The Revenge by the late (and lamentedly so!) Mr. Richard Jeni:

"Have you ever seen a movie where they don't even try to have it make sense, they just slap you in the face with how shitty it is? You're sitting there, and you're going, "Maybe this movie isn't so bad and maybe I'm not wasting my life," and the movie slaps you in the face and goes:

Yes you are.

and you say "Are you sure?" and the movie continuously slaps you and says:

Yeah. Absolutely.

"Well how do you know?"

Well, look at you *slap* sitting there at 4 in the morning *slap*, with one sweat sock *slap* and a bag of shitty popcorn *slap* watching a movie about a shark *slap* that only kills one family out of an ocean full of perfectly *slap* edible *slap* people *slap* for no reason that we ever bothered to explain *slap* and we can't pry you off the bed with a spatula because you think it's bound *slap* to *slap* get *slap* better *slap* if you keep watching.

Because that's why you're watching it. You're going, "It can't be this bad! It must get better!"

-Richard Jeni

There. Mr. Jeni said it FAR, FAR more eloquently than I could.

I read all *slap* three *slap* of these books *slap* for JUST THAT REASON. But you know... like Jaws 4... they DIDN'T.

These days... I have far less patience with crap.
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10/04/2016 marked as: read

Comments (showing 1-2 of 2) (2 new)

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Cecile Funny that I find myself in the same situation, where I wonder if I'll be able to finish this book one day, let alone the whole series!
Only a quarter of the book in 3 weeks (not a good sign), and I'm desperate for a marsquake or the coming of aliens to spice up the story.

message 2: by Richard (new)

Richard Ouch. I was going to read this but I can't bring myself to read or watch anything compared to Jaws 4. Why did the shark roar like a dinosaur when they electrocuted it. It just makes we want to cry

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