Angela's Reviews > The Rosie Project
The Rosie Project
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by

What a shame!
What a shame Graeme Simsion wrote this offering "quickly" and that he went with a "comedy rather than a drama".
What a shame that the opportunity to educate and illuminate was squandered and traded for gratuitous laughs ,extreme generalisations and blatant stereotyping.
My initial delight at realising the subject matter of this book meant I was immediately enrolled in ' the project'. A third of the way into the book, I became uncomfortable with the tenor and theme. The premise that higher functioning individuals on the Autistic Spectrum , or anyone for that matter who sits outside societies 'normal' framework accepts their position matter-of-factly is absurd.
Don knows he is 'weird' , inappropriate and that people make fun of him and the author suggests that Don is OK with it. So accepting of ridicule is he that he purposefully resorts to self-promotion as the class clown and nutty professor as a means of gaining some form of acceptance or acknowledgment. Don tells us that he is "an expert at being laughed at" , but Simsion never let him tell us how he felt about being so. Instead the author invites us to laugh along with an inexhaustable number of accounts of 'crazy' behaviours , thoughts and incidents throughout this 'comedy'. I waited and hoped for for the opportunity to feel Don's pain; but unfortunately his distress, sadness, vulnerability and loneliness if touched on were labels without feeling, what we regular people experience, but Asperger individuals ( according to Simsion) only know if they score highly on a questionnaire! The idea that the Don's of this world do not feel the aguish associated with isolation and rejection is no less inaccurate than they are incapable of feeling empathy or knowing how to show love.
In the 1997 movie "as Good As It Gets " ( mentioned in The Rosie Project), screenwriter Mark Andrus ensures that whilst revealing the prescriptive anxiety-provoking world of Obsessive- Compulsive Disorder , he never loses sight of the anguish and humanity that underscores the day to day reality of a person who fails to conform to societal norms. He offers the audience an opportunity to empathise as well as laugh at seemingly 'weird' behaviours of the main character Unfortunately, in his 'Rosie Project' , Simsion misses the opportunity to be a champion for his protagonist, failing to show that although Don is hard-wired neurologically to behave and respond in what makes make him a target for ridicule and isolation , that his acute awareness of how he is perceived comprimises his inner struggle and peace. Even at the end, when it seems Don has found happiness and acceptance, it was dependant on his adjustment and conformity to societies sensabilities.
Obviously I found some positives in this book. Well written, engaging and with plenty of local flavour being set in Melbourne , making for an enjoyable read. The insights offered about the inconsistencies of what society accepts of human behaviour depending on who you are or your position in life were welcomed. I also felt heartened that along with laughing at Don, the audience were also shown that if you move beyond the visible and audible irregularities of a person, we all have something to offer; that we all have value and strengths and all deserve respect and to be treated with dignity. I hope that maybe, some readers will also see beyond the comedy to the human side and perhaps even accept that maybe, we 'neurotypicals' all need to change a little , tolerate a little bit more and accept a different way of seeing things so that the marginalised in society can fit in a little bit more.
I share my life with a 'Don' and I think 'the Rosie Project' has not done his cause any favours and does not represent him faithfully, with respect or the humanity he deserves.
Again... What a shame!
What a shame Graeme Simsion wrote this offering "quickly" and that he went with a "comedy rather than a drama".
What a shame that the opportunity to educate and illuminate was squandered and traded for gratuitous laughs ,extreme generalisations and blatant stereotyping.
My initial delight at realising the subject matter of this book meant I was immediately enrolled in ' the project'. A third of the way into the book, I became uncomfortable with the tenor and theme. The premise that higher functioning individuals on the Autistic Spectrum , or anyone for that matter who sits outside societies 'normal' framework accepts their position matter-of-factly is absurd.
Don knows he is 'weird' , inappropriate and that people make fun of him and the author suggests that Don is OK with it. So accepting of ridicule is he that he purposefully resorts to self-promotion as the class clown and nutty professor as a means of gaining some form of acceptance or acknowledgment. Don tells us that he is "an expert at being laughed at" , but Simsion never let him tell us how he felt about being so. Instead the author invites us to laugh along with an inexhaustable number of accounts of 'crazy' behaviours , thoughts and incidents throughout this 'comedy'. I waited and hoped for for the opportunity to feel Don's pain; but unfortunately his distress, sadness, vulnerability and loneliness if touched on were labels without feeling, what we regular people experience, but Asperger individuals ( according to Simsion) only know if they score highly on a questionnaire! The idea that the Don's of this world do not feel the aguish associated with isolation and rejection is no less inaccurate than they are incapable of feeling empathy or knowing how to show love.
In the 1997 movie "as Good As It Gets " ( mentioned in The Rosie Project), screenwriter Mark Andrus ensures that whilst revealing the prescriptive anxiety-provoking world of Obsessive- Compulsive Disorder , he never loses sight of the anguish and humanity that underscores the day to day reality of a person who fails to conform to societal norms. He offers the audience an opportunity to empathise as well as laugh at seemingly 'weird' behaviours of the main character Unfortunately, in his 'Rosie Project' , Simsion misses the opportunity to be a champion for his protagonist, failing to show that although Don is hard-wired neurologically to behave and respond in what makes make him a target for ridicule and isolation , that his acute awareness of how he is perceived comprimises his inner struggle and peace. Even at the end, when it seems Don has found happiness and acceptance, it was dependant on his adjustment and conformity to societies sensabilities.
Obviously I found some positives in this book. Well written, engaging and with plenty of local flavour being set in Melbourne , making for an enjoyable read. The insights offered about the inconsistencies of what society accepts of human behaviour depending on who you are or your position in life were welcomed. I also felt heartened that along with laughing at Don, the audience were also shown that if you move beyond the visible and audible irregularities of a person, we all have something to offer; that we all have value and strengths and all deserve respect and to be treated with dignity. I hope that maybe, some readers will also see beyond the comedy to the human side and perhaps even accept that maybe, we 'neurotypicals' all need to change a little , tolerate a little bit more and accept a different way of seeing things so that the marginalised in society can fit in a little bit more.
I share my life with a 'Don' and I think 'the Rosie Project' has not done his cause any favours and does not represent him faithfully, with respect or the humanity he deserves.
Again... What a shame!
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Robert
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Jun 23, 2013 03:53PM

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Thanks Robert. I too enjoyed the book, despite my misgivings.


Thanks Joy. I wrote my review for that very reason - to provide some balance and a different perspective. My 'Don' is currently reading TRP and he says whilst it makes him feel uncomfortable he can see why readers enjoy it and find it funny (in a sitcom kind of way). He does hope that Don does not become the poster-boy for Aspies, as he does not feel represented by him, striving every day to avoid ridicule and social faux pas.

As for using Don as the brunt of jokes... I never laughed AT him. The bit with the skeleton was hilarious, but i felt like the joke was on the Dean- after all, she was the one who opened Don's door without asking. I thought less of her after the incident, but it didn't hurt my opinion of Don- everyone does bizarre stuff when they think no one's watching.
And I've always felt that if a book is good, the characters' feelings can be inferred and shouldn't have to be spelled out explicitly- "he felt sad, she felt happy" gets to be a drag after awhile. And i think Simpson did a great job of implying Don's feelings; for example, although don doesnt linger much on his relationship with his father, his knee-jerk reaction when he needs to pick a fake career is "hardware store owner"- like his father.



Thanks Kristy.
Since writing my review I have accepted that Simsion's offering is pure fiction for entertainment and as such is a very good book for general consumption.

Thanks for your comments Alexandra. I agree some of the insights into Don's way of thinking were well placed and accurate. It was interesting you highlighted the skeleton scene. I was uncomfortable reading this as it was such a fabricated scenario , purely for laughs and not like anything I could imagine Don doing. Someone as intelligent as Don would not try and simulate sex with a skeleton...
However, I am coming around to the idea that TRP is a piece of pure fiction for entertainment and not education.


I am glad my review sparked thought...it was intended to provide some balance and a different perspective.

3. An inability (or reduced ability) to empathise is not the same as an inability to love." p 312
I felt his pain. The way his pain comes out, in apparent logic and reason, is clear to me, cleverly done. He would not show pain as others might. He so human, so real. Maybe being around family and friends with similar "nerd" "high-functioning Asperger" "skills" has attuned me?
Although the hero has a reverse-Cinderella makeover, showing love does mean willingness and ability to change. Caring can lend confidence. (Personal experience examples - boyfriend went from fear of climbing a tree or apartment balcony to a pilot license, never leaving home-city to months working in other continents.) Most importantly, Don and Rosie both had fun together from the beginning, and did not have to transform. That moral is obvious, no?
I'd forgotten, once upon a time and long ago, before "Asperger" tossed around like breakfast flakes, another book that taught me spice racks do not have to be alphabetical and other life lessons. You might prefer https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/6...?

CORRECT!

CORRECT!"
agree.:)

3. An inability (or reduced ability) to empathise is not the same as an inability to love." p 312
I..."
Thank you for your insights and perspective.


3. An inability (or reduced ability) to empathise is not the same as an inability to love." p 312
I..."
Thank you have bookmarked the novel you suggested to read in the future.


Thanks Ethna. In my experience, the 'Dons' I know are not laughing at themselves... Being them is no laughing matter. It does have many positives, some of which were highlighted in this book but it is also trying, confusing, confronting and at times exhausting to negotiate the social world... it is rarely funny to them. Being laughed at does not mean being accepted or respected. Individuals on the spectrum would love to be able to " laugh, live and love" with us , but this is not often their reality.



I am also sure you will enjoy The Rosie Project.







Thanks Kelly.









Initially I took offence and bemoaned Simsion's missed opportunity to do something more and really special with the Autistic voice, hence my review. Over, time however my feelings have mellowed and I have accepted this novel for what it is and have no further expectations on its role for improving the understanding or acceptance of people on the spectrum. In fact, a positive outcome has been the debate and discussion promoted by reviews such as mine and others and so on some level I am grateful to this book.
I still wish that Autism had not been linked, however indirectly, with the character of Don,. It would have been more believable and no less entertaining.
Most Aspie people 'suffer needlessly' due to the ongoing inability to fit in and such gross stereotyping as is depicted in this book is not that helpful for their cause. My son who is an amazing young man, capable, productive and a truly beautiful soul endeavours every day to be a part of the social world that can reject or ignore him. Every day , he does his best to 'modify and accommodate' ...to fit in. He shuns both the stereotype and the expectation to behave as the fictitious autistic people portrayed. He wishes that people could understand that he is not WEIRD but just WIRED differently and believes that he should be afforded,as the majority of us are, the ability and acceptance to be himself provided he behaves in a benevolent and safe manner. TRP now has added a cute fuzzy nutty professor as the poster boy for Asperger's, and new expectations for individuals like my son to have to live up to. Most 'Aspies' cannot, despite endeavour, shed their autistic traits and behaviours as Don was able to do towards the end of the book. My son will always have autism and behave in ways that set him up for scrutiny and ridicule.
The only time we laugh at his quirkiness is when we laugh with him, when he finds something funny about his own behaviour; because we know and see when others laugh or mock him how crushed he is and that they are only seeing the stereotype and thinking he is just another Sheldon Cooper or now, Don Tilman, whom they have been given licence to laugh at.
If Don and his loved ones could see those watching and laughing at the many 'scenes' he finds himself in during the book, they would not be laughing with the onlookers....If I was Don's mother, I would be crying. But, here is the thing, I live in the real world of autism, on a day to day basis. And despite my son being the shining light of my life, a young man whom I admire more than any living person I know, I have to say that being on the Autistic spectrum is just not that funny! It is many, many wonderful things... just not that funny!



The other point which I'm missing is the question of personality. Aspis have some familiar problems with social interactions , but they have very different personalities like anybody ! One can laugh on himself the other not.

Thanks Zsuzsanna, you make a very good point about individual personality.





I sincerely would like to thank you for reminding me about Jerry...it inspired me to go to the 'tribute to Jerry Espenson' you tube clip which made me smile with admiration and cry for his pain all over again. It also reacquainted me with Katie Lloyd, Jerry's final love interest who truly understood, admired and above all respected Jerry in every way. She is my champion!... in my mind, she and Alan Shore are tied first place getters for the best characters in a show where most could be given the prize. I would be more than happy for Jerry to be the poster boy for Aspergians, not so Don who,due to the popularity of the book, now is!
Had Don Tilman been cast in a more sensitive , respectful and faithful way, my impression of this character and the author may have been more positive. Regardless, I accept that many, including you Grant, did take from TRP some positive and meaningful messages and I am happy for that.
Again thank you for reminding me about Jerry... I will be pulling out the last series Boston Legal DVD's tonight.
