Junkie for the Written Word's Reviews > A Dream of Spring

A Dream of Spring by George R.R. Martin
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Oct 14, 2012

bookshelves: to-read

10/14/12 I'm just going to go ahead and assume that my daughter, who was negative 7 when A Game of Thrones came out, will be sexually active and possibly married with children by the time this book is released. Just call me Granny.

I promise you this Mr. George Arr Arr Martin, if you have the audacity to die before you finish this series, I will wait patiently until I die as well, all the while plotting my revenge, then I will suck your spirit down into an abyss filled with thousands and thousand of clones of Kathy Bates with sledge hammers and Dr. Quinn Medicine Women. They will all stand in line, each waiting for their chance to break every bone in your body and then heal you in turn. And in the background I'll be playing Fox News Channel. Try me.

And don't even think to ask Jesus for mercy, he hasn't liked you since you killed off Ned Stark. (The show didn't help you any either, he always had a soft spot for Boromir. Seriously, Boromir has to die again?)

Just found this, lurve it.
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Reading Progress

02/02/2016 marked as: to-read

Comments (showing 1-35 of 35) (35 new)

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message 1: by Jennifer (new)

Jennifer That is hilarious!!! My bff and I have both said we want to do a 'Misery' on him!!

Junkie for the Written Word Jennifer wrote: "That is hilarious!!! My bff and I have both said we want to do a 'Misery' on him!!"

If there were no danger of jail time someone would have done it by now!

message 3: by Alex (new) - added it

Alex He's already committed Robert Jordan's penultimate error (mid-series plot drift). He'd better not follow RJ's worst error and die before finishing.

Junkie for the Written Word Jordan lost me due to drift. But I heard Sanderson did a good job finishing up the series, which I believe, since I greatly enjoyed the few books I've read by Sanderson.

message 5: by Carla (new)

Carla Spach Hello, just drop by to say: I loved your "Revenge Plot"!!! You should write a book yourself! I`d read it for sure...

message 6: by Terri (new) - added it

Terri Loved this! Read it out loud to anyone who would listen, and since I work in a public library, that was a lot of folks, lol!

message 7: by Donna (new)

Donna D. OMG! I just came up here to see if there was a date yet for the next book...2019...are you f-ing kidding me!!! a 5 year wait was bad enough... LOVED your rant! I also stopped reading RJ books, but have heard great things about Sanders, maybe some day...

message 8: by Ali (new) - rated it 5 stars

Ali I agree with Donna... i was under the impression the book was due release maybe at the last quarter of 2013 or maybe at 2014 at max, but 2019 blew me away. I loved your comment Tia Jones and would ask you a boon. Can u squeeze me in with the clones of Kathy Bates? I also want my share of revenge on Martin :p.... p.s. I was done with his six books waaaaaaay before the series... the wait is agonizing and horrible... for ppl like us who already know the story till book 6...

message 9: by H2oyea (new)

H2oyea Winds of Winter isn't out yet -_-

It's five books for now.

message 10: by Magaly (new)

Magaly Guerrero The winter came and nothing. Maybe now that we got a vortex...

message 11: by Simon (new)

Simon Nice to keep in mind that this is someone's creative work, and unlike contrary belief he owes you nothing. Neil Gaiman has a wonderful write up on this. Worth checking out!

Junkie for the Written Word Yes, we all know George RR Martin isn't our bitch, it's even mentioned in the video that I linked in the review. That said, if he dies before he finishes I WILL MAKE HIM MY BITCH!

message 13: by Adrian (new)

Adrian your post needs to be flagged as awesome

message 14: by Magaly (new)

Magaly Guerrero Adrian wrote: "your post needs to be flagged as awesome"

I second, third and even fifth this notion!

message 15: by Annette (new) - added it

Annette Loved it, I have to check out the video. I feel nearly the same way

message 16: by Evgeny (new)

Evgeny I am not going to sleep tonight seeing Kathy Bates and Quinn Medicine Women clones in every dark corner of my bedroom :( I can only hope the image will fade from my memory by tomorrow's night. Thanks for nothing!!!

message 17: by Amy-jessa (new)

Amy-jessa Anaru I find it funny that this comment was written two years ago and it's still not out

message 18: by Michelle (new)

Michelle Burt LMFAO, BookJunky*!!! Spot.fricken.ON.I have read & reread all & watched series closely....but your *Misery* Metaphor paired with Jane 'terrible f'n jewelry & 'acting' is indeed a level of hell DANTE dare not mention!.... Must i (& others) make Mar-mar 'put more lotion on the skin til he write d@mned books Again?!!! I GRT he's busy..but We The People needs Edification GoT stylee STAT!!!!!!!

message 19: by Robert (new) - added it

Robert Reed Sanderson did a fantastic job finishing up WOT.

Martins weight concerns me. I cant go thru this again. At least Martin hasnt strung things out as bad as Jordan did.

message 20: by Amber (new) - added it

Amber Best review EVER :D

message 21: by Nonikell (new)

Nonikell love

message 22: by Tina (new) - added it

Tina Oh this is about the funniest thing I have ever read

message 23: by Arinshah (new)

Arinshah Samsudin GRRM has confirmed that Winds of Winter will hit the streets I early 2016.. In the meantime, GRRMs "A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms" (released Fall, 2015) will have to satisfy all his poor suffering fans first..

message 24: by Lisa (new) - added it

Lisa Whitney This way too funny

message 25: by Lisa (new) - added it

Lisa Whitney This way too funny

message 26: by Ian (new)

Ian J i am like right beside you in that note

message 27: by Ceki (new) - added it

Ceki loool

message 28: by Mer (new)

Mer I feel your pain...I am a grandmother now and started these books when my kids were in their early teens!

Junkie for the Written Word Mer, I was 17 when A Game of Thrones came out. My daughter is 13 now. I was half joking when I wrote this review, but I may actually be a grandma before this series is completed.

message 30: by Evgeny (last edited Feb 22, 2017 05:02AM) (new)

Evgeny Junkie for the Written Word wrote: "Mer, I was 17 when A Game of Thrones came out. My daughter is 13 now. I was half joking when I wrote this review, but I may actually be a grandma before this series is completed."

I strongly suspect your daughter would be a great-grandma by the time the next book is published :D

message 31: by Angie (new) - added it

Angie Doane goodson I admit, I didn't start reading this series until this year. Reason being, by the time I heard about it, I was told the series was unfinished and in limbo. No one thought Mr Martin would "live to finish it". This blew me away since he had finished #5 several years ago. I may not be an author but surely it doesn't take a decade to write one book.
I haven't even allowed myself to watch the TV series until I was sure it was going to go with the books and not off on some producer's fantasy. I am currently on Feast of Crows but I think I would go insane if I had to wait 10-20 years for the next book. But as it is, if he dies before writing #6 & #7, I will be right there with you...waiting.

message 32: by Chantal (new) - added it

Chantal 2017. My daughter was 12 and myself 39 when I started the books. I now am a grand-mother of two and retired. I will also be right there with the gang... waiting.

message 33: by Sakinah (new)

Sakinah So hilarious. But you have all the fight hhhhhh
Loved your comment to death

message 34: by Vonda (new) - added it

Vonda Krakar love This book gives me hope of something more after The Winds of Winter ♥

message 35: by Zokar (new) - added it

Zokar George r r martin you better not die befor finishing this book

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