Justin's Reviews > Heaven
Heaven (Halo, #3)
Aug 15, 2012
My experience with this novel has brought a few names to mind. Stephen King, Ray Bradbury, George Orwell; these are a few of the well known scribes who can step their old dead asses aside. There's a new fuckin' sheriff in town and I believe her name's Alexandra Adornetto. She wields words like swords and swords like delicious sticks of honey butter. Picture a diamond studded french fry dipped in ecstasy laced ketchup being fed to you by the sexiest set of siamese twins alive, while Morgan Freeman delivers a manifesto on how nice looking you are, and you may gather one tenth of a vague notion of how soul ticklingly delightful this hallowed tome truly is. Where I used to spend my evenings ravenously hunting seagulls from the depths of my hedge, I now feast on Adornetto's succulent prose, each taste more delicious than the last. With this review I call for a full on cerebral assault on anyone not willing to take the work of Alexandra Adornetto as the Ultimate truth. My afflicted brothers and sisters, We shall prevail.
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August 15, 2012 – Shelved