Tracie's Reviews > Fifty Shades of Grey

Fifty Shades of Grey by E.L. James
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's review
Jun 04, 2012

bookshelves: ebook, this-book-blows-goats-i-have-proof

Let's do this.

I'm borrowing this from the NYPL for Kindle so no one has to see me reading it, and I'm going to status update frequently, so climb aboard.

"Climb aboard" was probably the worst thing I could have said.

ETA: The woman who wrote this book has never had sex. The end.

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Reading Progress

June 4, 2012 – Started Reading
June 4, 2012 – Shelved
June 4, 2012 –
page 15
2.92% "15 pages in; no sex yet"
June 4, 2012 –
page 35
6.81% "35 pages in; still no sex. Come on."
June 4, 2012 –
page 42
8.17% "This is possibly the worst thing I've ever read. It's maybe worse than Twilight, except at least it's not written with teenage girls as its target audience. I know this started out as fanfiction, but I have read A LOT of fanfiction that's better than this. No sex yet, but she has used the word "Adonis""
June 4, 2012 –
page 56
10.89% "Ladies and gentlemen, we have our first erection. But still no intercourse. Just a tease in an elevator."
June 5, 2012 –
page 85
16.54% "Unlocked: Penetration Level One, Vanilla Sex"
June 5, 2012 –
page 101
19.65% "I've been reading the sex scenes out loud to Chris and we've never laughed harder. She still hasn't signed her bondage paperwork though so no weird stuff."
June 5, 2012 –
page 101
19.65% "My favoritest part of this crapfest might be that every time the Latino character appears he exclaims, "Dios mio!""
June 5, 2012 –
page 130
25.29% "I know I shouldn't stereotype, but I have a hard time believing a dude this into hardcore bondage drinks only white wine."
June 5, 2012 –
page 139
27.04% "Contender for favorite line so far: "'I don't remember reading about nipple clamps in the Bible.'""
June 6, 2012 –
page 200
38.91% "These are some pretty detailed descriptions of what's going on from someone who's supposed to be blindfolded."
June 7, 2012 –
page 306
59.53% "No she didn't just use the term "UST""
June 7, 2012 –
84.0% "The Scarlet Letter has the burst of sunshine; 50 Shades of Grey has the scene with the tampon."
June 7, 2012 –
95.0% "Aw, he's braiding her hair."
June 7, 2012 – Shelved as: ebook
June 7, 2012 – Shelved as: this-book-blows-goats-i-have-proof
June 7, 2012 – Finished Reading

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