Jody Mena's Reviews > The Invisible Orientation: An Introduction to Asexuality

The Invisible Orientation by Julie Sondra Decker
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it was amazing
bookshelves: nonfiction

This book, apart from being thoroughly educational and an excellent resource, was more than anything an eye-opener and a great relief to me. I had an inkling that I wasn't quite "normal" for a long time, like I was reading from a script of how I was supposed to be. But so little of it came naturally to me, and what did come naturally so often ended up causing confusion, misunderstandings and hurt.

It never occurred to me that my orientation might be anything other than heterosexual, and I only just learned that something called asexuality existed a couple years ago, but even then I didn't connect the dots. I just figured I was deficient or broken inside, and it was a huge source of shame and loneliness for me.

I wish there had been a book like this decades ago, I might have grown to understand and accept myself so much sooner. The author shares a a comprehensive picture of what it means to be asexual, and breaks it down from multiple angles to help you not just note the facts, but really understand them. (Several times I came across an example she used, and my jaw would just drop to the floor, because it fit me so exactly, and I had genuinely believed I was the only one who has ever felt that way, or seen things that way.) The advice she presents, both to asexual people and non-asexual people about how to deal with all sorts of scenarios is an absolute gem. The anecdotes in the gray boxes were enormously helpful as well, and the list of resources at the end gives the reader a road map to find their way to more information.

I just really want to thank the author. I feel like everything is shifting into focus for once, and it's a great comfort and relief. I recommend this book to anyone you can get to read it. It will help people understand this orientation, and maybe a few people like me will be able to have an epiphany that there isn't actually anything wrong with them after all.
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Reading Progress

Started Reading
October 13, 2018 – Shelved
October 13, 2018 – Shelved as: nonfiction
October 13, 2018 – Finished Reading

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