Fares's Reviews > Lady Midnight

Lady Midnight by Cassandra Clare
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it was amazing
bookshelves: favorites
Read 4 times. Last read December 25, 2018 to December 28, 2018.

Everyone knows that 4 is the perfect amount of reads, so don't judge me. Or was it 5? Maybe just to be sure I'll reread for the fifth time sometime :)
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Now I want to watch Notting Hill 😂
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I…
*Breaths in*
don’t…
*Breaths out*
know…
*Breaths in*
what’s…
*Breaths out*
happening…
*Breaths in*

Why am I so emotionally drained?
Why am I so emotionally invested in these characters?
Why do I feel so sad that they do not exist? And why do I want to cry because of that? And why had I cried because of that? And why, just why do they not exist?

I don’t know what’s happening to me ☹ I really don't know and so I’m going to reread just one day after I finished.
---
The reread is done and I understand more and less at the same time.

It’s so confusing that I love this book and there are things I don’t want to love, things that honestly I’m kind of scared to be liking, things like the love triangle and the “lowkey” cheating. There’s always some of that in Cassandra’s books and it’s something that always bothered me but not in this book, I don’t think I’d go as far as saying I enjoyed them but I didn’t mind them as much as I did before, I loved the characters too much to hate them for that, Is that a bad thing? That I love these characters so much I’m ready to ignore something I believe to be wrong.

The other thing is the romance, this may not be as big of an issue as the love triangle and the cheating, maybe some of you will see it as no issue at all, but for someone like me who always saw it as a secondary thing, the plot first romance second, it’s weird to fall for this book, it is weird to daydream about it and it is weird to feel so much… *sigh*.

I never mind the romance, I enjoy it but I don’t see it as the driving force for a book, or at least I thought so, now I’m not sure. I used to skip such scenes, blushing and mortified that maybe someone noticed what I just read even when I completely alone 😂. And now after reading this and rereading it, I love it? I’m not sure, as I said I’m so confused. I’m not saying it’s not okay to love it, I just don’t understand why this book of all made me feel this way? Why do I… *sigh again*

There’s a knot over my chest and I don’t know how to get rid of it and I think I’m slumping.

I don’t think this is the kind of reviews you guys signed up for, I’m sorry I’m not sure how to go on about it honestly.

I think there are 3 questions that need answering about this book for you to know my experience reading this book and I’ll try and answer them.
What did you love about this book?
What did you hate about this book?
What did you find unique about this book?


What do you love about this book?
Two characters. While I do love all the character in various degrees, these two are love and joy and life, they are heartbreak and tears and death. They are my heart.

Octavian Blackthorn

“Tavvy was standing by a whiteboard with a blue dry-erase marker, making possibly helpful notations, if they could ever be translated out of seven-year-old.”

You can’t hate Tavvy, you just can’t.
There are no words in this world to tell you how I feel about him, at least not words that I know of. This is terrible because I want to say so much about him but I don’t know how, so here are almost all of Tavvy’s scenes in the book, there are no spoilers but I tagged them just in case you wanted to know him reading the book.

(view spoiler)

Julian Blackthorn
Every time his uncle calls him Andrew my heart shatters.

I have a place I go to, a special place, it’s not a secret or a hidden place but I think of it as my place, I go to it when I need to think, when I need to make sense of things, I go to it almost every day, not because I need to make sense of things every day but because it’s a common place, it only becomes special when I need it to be. I guess it’s not a special place exactly but a place for special things, it’s a place only made special by me and the thoughts I have while I’m in there.

I shared my place with only two book characters, only two characters made me want to spend an afternoon, just me alone with my thoughts, just me alone with them, thinking.
Only two book characters made me love them so much I hated them for being fictional.
Julian Blackthorn is one of them.

Julian is whom I wish to be, I relate to him in some ways and that was more than enough for me. I want him to be happy, I want him to be hugged and be told that he’s loved, I want him to see himself as I see him. He makes me want to be better, he cares for his family, he’ll do anything for them and expects nothing in return.
Julian is the guardian angel for the people he loves, and his love for them makes him go out of his way, he’ll do wrong things to keep this family together and you can tell he hates it because he’s just the purest soul.

I don’t know if I’m lucky or not, if you ever felt what I’m feeling you know what I’m talking about. Have you ever loved a character so much, in one hand you’re happy that you know them and in the other hand what does your life mean if you can’t protect them? if you can only wait to see what happens to them and you can’t do anything about it, what's the point if you're going to be absolutely helpless?

Maybe I’m just being overdramatic and I won’t feel the same tomorrow but I don’t want to read anything now, not that I can anyway.

What did you hate about this book?
Mark

Okay so this is what I wrote about Mark while I was reading, it’s unedited and I should say that Mark made me feel more confusion than hate, I think this shows as you read these unedited notes.

Mark is what I hate about this book he’s generally what I hate about most of Casandra Clare’s books.
He is all over the place with his feelings and I hate it when a character’s feelings for another comes before his family and unfortunately that is Mark.

I feel sorry for what he has been through but he blames Julian for not trying to find him (view spoiler), Julian was 12. And no one, NO ONE has the right to say anything to Julian.

“He seemed like someone who had woken up after a hundred years of sleep, shaking the dust of a century’s dreams from his feet. He had been terrified...”

Mark has suffered, he’s hurt body and soul and I hate what happened to him, he makes me so confused, I don’t want to hate him but.
Granted this is not a perfect situation but everyone seems to be trying except him.

“I am Julian’s parabatai,” she said. “And Julian needs you to stay.”
“Julian is strong,” he said.
“Julian is strong,” she agreed. “But you are his brother. And if you go—I don’t know if I can pick up those pieces.”
His eyes flicked back to her closet. “We survive losses,” he whispered.


We do survive but that doesn’t mean we should inflict them voluntarily on the ones we love, and Julian already lost way too much, why is he the only one that needs to survive the losses while everyone else finds their escape.

Where the plot is going.

This is more of a guess but the way I’m seeing the story is going is not something I like then again what do I know, I thought I won’t like this and look at me now.
The way I see the story is Julian having to make hard choices between Emma and his family, I don’t like that, it’s what I hate about most characters, that they sacrifice their family for the one they love, not only do I hate it but also I don’t see Julian doing that and if he does I’d be so disappointed, it’ll make all the feels he had for his siblings seem fake and that will break my heart.

And the love shapes, I always hate those and it seems there are going to be more of those.

I have to say though that both of those problems didn’t bother me much as I fell head over heels for the characters.
Also I think I hated perfect Diego but I haven’t seen much of him to be sure.

Also why is there no female characters like Julian or Jem from TID? I always like the male characters in these books more, if there was a female Julian, my life would be perfect.


What did you find unique about this book?
Unique doesn’t necessarily mean good.

This book took me by surprise, I didn’t expect at all to fall in love with it this much probably because of the previous experiences with Shadowhunters, so my expectations weren’t high but to feel this much for a book you thought so little of, it’s overwhelming.

How I didn’t mind the plot

Let me be honest for a second here, Cassandra Clare’s book are less about the fantasy element and more about YA and that’s not a bad thing except that I always go into them with a fantasy mindset, that makes me focus on the plot and less about the other things and when the plot becomes predictable I lose interest but that didn’t happen with this one, this book actually restored my faith in contemporaries, recently I wasn’t in the mood for them but now I want them more and I love it more for that.

I just love some characters beyond what I thought possible, that made me ignore a lot of things just the happiness of my beloved characters, that’s all I wanted.

How I loved the romance.

As I said in the beginning, I love the romance in this book, I don’t know how to approach this and I'm blushing just thinking about it so umm I'll leave it at that.

How much I cried

It’s not that much but it happened more than I expected and this isn’t the most heartbreaking book ever. I don’t know why exactly this happened and I asked myself that so many times, at one point I believed something is wrong with me.

Other things
Here are things that added to the entire experience.

Emma

Emma is ruthless, she doesn’t go in roundabout ways, she’s a straightforward rip off the band-aid kind of girl.

“Half the scars Emma had on her body she’d put there herself, teaching herself to fall from the highest rafters, training herself to fight through pain by practicing barefoot—on broken glass.”

“This is about me, not you,” she said into the phone. Cristina gave her an encouraging thumbs-up. “I am sick of you.” She smiled brightly as Cristina dropped her face into her hands. “So maybe we could go back to being friends?”
There was a click as he hung up.


That was funny, I laughed at that until Christina pointed out that in two months Emma forgot three dates with him, skipped his birthday and dumped him because it was a slow patrol night.
This what makes me conflicted about her, she’s strong and can do what others can’t but she can be cruel and harsh too.

She loves her best friend Cristina.

She’s rebellious and hates some of the laws the Clave made and when those laws stand on her way to discover what happened to her parents she doesn’t hesitate to break them. That makes me excited to see what she’ll do when the laws stand between her and love.

Cristina

She has a past and she’s trying to forget it.

As Emma said about her “… she’d always had the air of someone running from something.”

She loves Emma, I think they even could’ve been parabatai if Emma wasn’t with Julian.

She brushed her hands through Emma’s hair, looking at her worriedly. “You sure you’re not hurt?”
“Julian’s blood,” Emma whispered, and Cristina made a murmuring noise and pulled Emma into a hug. She patted Emma’s back and Emma hung on to her for dear life and decided there and then that if anyone ever tried to hurt Cristina she would grind them to a pulp and make amusing sand castles out of the remains.


Dru

“Dru loves horror movies,” said Emma. “Anything with the word ‘blood’ or ‘terror’ or ‘prom’ in it.

Dru of all the Blackthorns I want to befriend, they all have someone that can be considered their other half except for her and that’s unacceptable because she’s the best, THE BEST.

Livvy

“Books about computers and programming languages were stacked in careful rows by her bed.”

I thought of Kady from Illuminae right after I read that. Livvy is my girl I just wish we had more of her, I think she would’ve been my favorite.

Ty

“On the bedside table were his most beloved books: Arthur Conan Doyle’s Sherlock Holmes stories.”

I think Ty is a combination of me and my sister, and I can’t not love him. He and Livvy both have a half of my heart, they are both so precious.

“Livvy, who knew better than anyone the anxiety that imprecise language could cause her brother, scrambled to her feet and went over to him. She put her arms around him, her chin against his shoulder. Ty leaned against her, his eyes half-lidded...”

The writing

The writing was beautiful, there are moments when I stopped reading and just closed my eyes and started dreaming. That’s not always the case though, I found that some parts of the book are better written than others.
That is not to say that it was bad, just some part like the prologue and such were more beautiful than others. Maybe this is just me and how I swoon over descriptive writing (if it doesn’t drag for long which it didn’t) I think what I’m trying to say is the writing was okay with some beautiful moments

This is all I have, I'm actually tired 😂 and this was embarrassing.
The End.
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Reading Progress

July 1, 2018 – Started Reading
July 3, 2018 – Finished Reading
July 4, 2018 – Started Reading
July 7, 2018 – Shelved
July 7, 2018 – Shelved as: favorites
July 7, 2018 – Finished Reading
August 7, 2018 – Started Reading
August 7, 2018 –
0.0% "A wise man once said "I'll never read a Cassandra Clare book again"

Yeah, he wasn't very wise, and he's reading this for the third time in just over a month :)"
August 7, 2018 –
5.0% "“This is about me, not you,” she said into the phone. Cristina gave her an encouraging thumbs-up. “I am sick of you.” She smiled brightly as Cristina dropped her face into her hands. “So maybe we could go back to being friends?”
There was a click as Cameron hung up.


Poor Cameron."
August 7, 2018 –
7.0% "Emma had long had the suspicion that there hadn’t been much hugging in Cristina’s home

Oh Cristina 😢
I don't know how this whole parabatai situation ends but I "tai " Cristina and Emma together. I love their friendship."
August 8, 2018 –
9.0% "She’d tried to conjure up a vision of what she’d do when she found out who’d killed them. How any amount of physical pain she could inflict could ever even begin to make up for what she’d lost.

😢😢"
August 9, 2018 –
19.0% "He stood in front of them with his arms outstretched as if he could protect them, as if he could make a wall with his body that would hold back death.
And then death stepped out in front of him.


12 years old Julian Blackthorn 😢😢"
August 11, 2018 –
30.0% "Looking at the picture of Livvy, Emma felt a flash of admiration, love, a fear of loss, even—Julian would never speak of it, but she suspected he was watching Livvy and Ty become adults with more than a little terror.

To live is to suffer, to survive is to find some meaning in the suffering.
Friedrich Nietzsche.

I say
To reread is to suffer, to survive a reread is to find that nothing means anything anymore."
August 13, 2018 –
56.0% "“Human,” he said. “We all find out the people who are supposed to take care of us are human eventually. That they make mistakes.” He pushed his hair back out of his eyes. “I live in dread of the day the kids all figure that out about me.”"
August 15, 2018 – Finished Reading
December 25, 2018 – Started Reading
December 25, 2018 –
61.0% "He knew in the way that she was a part of him, the way her breathing was his breathing, and her dreams were his dreams, and her blood was his blood, and when her heart stopped he knew that his would too, and he would be glad, because he wouldn’t want to live one second in a world that didn’t have her in it.

Men don't cry Fares, men don't cry, hold it together.
But gosh darn it I have a heart!!"
December 28, 2018 – Finished Reading

Comments Showing 1-26 of 26 (26 new)

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message 1: by Karima (new)

Karima chermiti Well, that was the most adorable review ever, I loved it


Fares Karima wrote: "Well, that was the most adorable review ever, I loved it"

Thank you Karima I think I'll go bury my head now


Shruti - Bookbabe_4life Wow, the most honest review i happened to come across in a while. Seriously, I know it's not my place to tell you since you're definitely older and more experienced in that field than me, but seriously, there's nothing wrong about being honest about your feelings. And nope, to answer your question, you're not being overdramatic :) We all have our moments and books tend to have that effect on us, especially the ones we love. If it makes you feel any better, I cry every time i read the book - If I Break. And, I'll just stop babbling now, sry i tend to do that. Hv a great day :)


Bhavik (Semi Hiatus) Ooh You're back....with a bang!


message 5: by Emy (new)

Emy OMG !!! I must read it !!!!


message 6: by Rusty (new)

Rusty Grey Fab review Fares !! You've piqued my interest in this series again . XD


Laura Herondale Great review! I love this series so much. I agree, Tavvy is honestly the most precious little cinnamon roll. I’m kind of impressed you were able to put all of your feelings into words, there’s no way I could do that with this book. And if I could, it would just be me raving about Ty Blackthorn. Now hurry up and read Lord of Shadows, because it gets so much better (yes, that is possible :P)


Fares Shruti Pandey wrote: "Wow, the most honest review i happened to come across in a while. Seriously, I know it's not my place to tell you since you're definitely older and more experienced in that field than me, but serio..."

THANK YOU!!!
it's always your place to tell me what you think, I don't mind XD
And I do love book and slump over them sometimes but it's something else entirely when you do not expect it. That review took some time and it's not something I usually do but I don't know what happened there XD


Fares Bhavik wrote: "Ooh You're back....with a bang!"

well as I say I press to impress.
That made sense in my mind but it doesn't look right now that I look at it, I'm gonna laeve it tho, I'm too lazy to change it.


Fares Emy wrote: "OMG !!! I must read it !!!!"

Tell me how it goes, though I must say I have no idea how to explain what happened there and I feel in other surcumstances I would've hatted it but I'm not complaining XD


Shruti - Bookbabe_4life Thank you , that's really sweet :) I hope you love the rest of the books you read in the same way you did this one. Happy reading buddy :)


Helena of Sparta ✰ I really enjoyed this review!!! Julian was definitely one of the (many) highlights of the book for me, as well! <3


Fares Rusty wrote: "Fab review Fares !! You've piqued my interest in this series again . XD"

Thanx Rusty that's what I'm here for to make everything more interesting :)


Fares Laura wrote: "Great review! I love this series so much. I agree, Tavvy is honestly the most precious little cinnamon roll. I’m kind of impressed you were able to put all of your feelings into words, there’s no w..."

Tavvy, my heart. I love him so much <3
It was hard and I don't think I've put everything, I was going to add some notes I wrote as I read but there's a character limit on reviews XD and I deleted many embarrassing things or else I would've died from this review.
I will try but no promises, I'm slumping now and maybe I'll wait till closer to book 3 publication date, but you're really making me excited.


Nadia Awadi I'm going to read the books just for Julian!


Fares Shruti Pandey wrote: "Thank you , that's really sweet :) I hope you love the rest of the books you read in the same way you did this one. Happy reading buddy :)"

Thank you, you're so awesome, happy reading to you too


Fares Helena wrote: "I really enjoyed this review!!! Julian was definitely one of the (many) highlights of the book for me, as well! <3"

Thank you so much Helena, Julian was the best of many things for me too, it's impossible to put all the feels I had reading this but it was an unforgettable experience and I just everyone feels the same at least once in their lives.


Fares Nadia wrote: "I'm going to read the books just for Julian!"

Oh please do he's so worth it, you won't regret it and if you do then I don't know you :)


Nadia Awadi Hhh, that's a real scary threat I guess. I will like him then.


Fares Nadia wrote: "Hhh, that's a real scary threat I guess. I will like him then."

I don't make threats, only promises :)
good that's good, your life will be better now.


Jen/The Tolkien Gal/ジェニファー Amazing review, Fares!


Virginia Ronan ♥ Herondale ♥ This was one hell of an awesome review. XD Loved it! But I do love Mark and Kieran, so *lol* that's one thing I don't agree with. Still, I love Tavvy and Julian so damn much too. Hell I love all the Blackthorns. My precious babies! XD And you just made me realize that I need to reread this series before "Queen of Air and Darkness" comes out. *lol* Oh boy! >_<


message 23: by Lucifer (new) - added it

Lucifer omg, this is amazing review, i don't finish the book yet, but my opinions are the same as yours jaja


Fares Jennifer (Jen/The Tolkien Gal) wrote: "Amazing review, Fares!"

Thank you Jenny.


Fares Virginia Ronan wrote: "This was one hell of an awesome review. XD Loved it! But I do love Mark and Kieran, so *lol* that's one thing I don't agree with. Still, I love Tavvy and Julian so damn much too. Hell I love all th..."

Thank you sweet potato :) Mark was a bit confusing for me that's all. Julian and Tavvy are my heart, they better end up happy and loved for the rest of their lives.
If you want to buddy read it tell me I might be interested, I'm total trash now XD


Fares Eros wrote: "omg, this is amazing review, i don't finish the book yet, but my opinions are the same as yours jaja"

Thank you so much, I hope you end up loving it even tho it made me kinda slump XD


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