Nenia ☠️ Khaleesi of Bodice Rippers, Protector of Out of Print Gems, Mother of Smut, and Actual Garbage Can ☠️ Campbell's Reviews > Shiver

Shiver by Maggie Stiefvater
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There's an old joke about TWILIGHT that you've probably heard: that it's the story of a teenage girl's struggle between necrophilia and bestiality, hurr hurr hurr. Well, here in TWILIGHT: Team Jacob Edition - *cough* - I mean, SHIVER, Maggie Stiefvater takes that a step further by writing about a girl named Grace who has romantic feelings for the wolf in her backyard. And when I say "wolf," that's not short for werewolf - before she even finds out that he can turn human (and oh, what rapturous joy that brings), she's fantasizing about the feeling of his fur under her fingers and dreaming about his eyes. She also won't ever shut up about wolves, and chats to her two friends about wolves constantly, and then is puzzled and irritated when they want to talk about other things that aren't wolves.



I might be the only person on the continental U.S. who hated THE RAVEN BOYS, but people kept telling me to give this author another chance, and I thought, "Well, okay, I did like TWILIGHT, and Jacob was cool, so maybe this will be okay." Superficially, it's a lot like TWILIGHT - it features a heroine who is wise beyond her years with absent-minded parents who she takes care of more than they take care of her; it features a supernatural love interest who likes the way the heroine smells and must fight against his nature in order to be with her, even if it results in his own death; it features an evil werewolf who is jealous of what the heroine represents and who decides to hunt, stalk, and attempt to kill her -



You can see where I'm going with this.



But comparing SHIVER to TWILIGHT is like comparing NIKE to ADIDAS or COKE to PEPSI or CHOCOLATE to VANILLA - there is only one clear winner. And spoiler, SHIVER is not that winner. First, the werewolf love interest is so lame. At least Edward had some of that Old World patriarchal charm, even if he could come across as controlling and creepy; it was obvious why he was so attractive - he was good looking and sophisticated and mature. Sam, on the other hand, is a droopy emo boy who composes poetry while they make love, and it is bad poetry, like the kind you see on Tumblr that doesn't make any sense but for some reason has thousands of reblogs. But the main reason this book gets one star is because of the heroine: Grace.



When she's not meditating on her favorite subject - wolf-lust - she's being a raging "See You Next Tuesday" to everyone in her life. The way she talks to her parents is absolutely disgusting; she is constantly snarking at them and disrespecting them and taking over their house and their things (do you pay for those things, girlfriend? is that why you feel free to take over your dad's study and then tell him he isn't getting it back?), but when they try to implement some actual parental control, she gets all bristly, like "how they try to do their job and be parents?" It's a real catch-22. But the disrespect doesn't stop there - when she brings Sam home to meet the folks, she gets angry that her mom is nice to her boyfriend, and slut-shames her own mom. OH MY GOD, CAN YOU NOT?!



I honestly don't understand why she has friends. When she's not talking about wolves, she's brushing off her friends or being rude. Everything that comes out of her mouth - that isn't some insipid drivel about how much she looooves Sam, that is - is either mean, rude, sarcastic, or brusque. She spends a great deal of time in this book looking at people coldly or speaking coldly, especially to her parents. She's even mean to Sam, telling him to shut up several times. OMG, can she die already, please? I think the only YA character I've hated more (that I wasn't actually supposed to hate) was CATH from FANGIRL. (Yet another book that is bewilderingly popular.)



The premise behind the werewolf transformations is also incredibly lame, so bear with me because ***SPOILERS*** werewolves transform based on temperature (so the temperature is always listed right below each chapter, so you know how cold it is, hence the title, SHIVER, because it's cold, get it?? so meta, wow), and when it's cold outside they turn into wolves, and when it's hot they turn into people - only after a certain number of years, they lose the ability to turn into people and just stay wolves. While reading this, I'm asking myself, "Why are they living somewhere so cold if this happens? Why not move to California where it basically never snows unless you live in the mountains?" But the author had an answer ready for this: moving to temperate places just makes you even more sensitive to small temperature changes, and you'll transform anyway. But ***SPOILERS*** Grace was bitten by wolves as a kid and didn't turn into a werewolf, because her neglectful parents "accidentally" (I think they were actually trying to murder this demon spawn) left her in the back of a car on a 100+-degree day while she was taking a nap, and she almost died, and apparently the heat + her fever cooked the werewolfiness right out of her. I AM NOT JOKING!!! So Grace & co. get the brilliant idea of infecting Sam and this other werewolf with meningitis, so they'll get high fevers that'll cook the werewolfiness out of them, too. I am shook with stupidity. How would this work, but moving somewhere temperate doesn't, Captain Cop-Out?



I can't with this series. I'll be the first to admit that TWILIGHT is not a great book, but it was fun and addictive and didn't have self-absorbed characters wallowing around in the pretentious prose of the narrative like it was some kind of smug, self-congratulatory swimming pool.



1 star
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Reading Progress

December 29, 2017 – Started Reading
December 29, 2017 – Shelved
December 29, 2017 – Shelved as: ya-ya-land
December 29, 2017 – Shelved as: pnr-uf
December 29, 2017 –
page 1
0.26% "***SNARK MODE ACTIVATED***

"
December 29, 2017 –
page 16
4.1% "Hmmmm a YA paranormal romance about a boring, wise-beyond-her years Mary Sue (with an absent minded mom) who falls in love with a supernatural creature who likes her scent and wants to eat her.

"
December 29, 2017 –
page 24
6.15% "And now she's getting a car... from her dad.

Also, sidenote: she doesn't know the wolf can turn human yet but she's still in love with him, so how do you have THAT conversation? "Mom, Dad... I met a wolf. I think I want to fuck it.""
December 29, 2017 –
page 31
7.95% "The wolves killed one of her classmates and Grace is mad at the classmate for dying because it'll cause people to go after the wolves:

I wondered how many someones it would take before they decided to go after the wolves.

To go after my wolf.

I knew this was the real reason why I couldn't forgive Jack for dying.


BITCH you don't look like a box of Rice Crispies, so why are you acting like you're cereal?"
December 29, 2017 –
page 64
16.41% "It's rude to stare, but the great thing about staring at a sedated person is that they don't know you're doing it.

Wow, Grace, you're creeping me out a lot right now."
December 29, 2017 –
page 78
20.0% "Grace is such a self-absorbed creepling. I think I hate her almost as much as I hated Cath from FANGIRL."
December 29, 2017 –
page 90
23.08% ""I don't shop very well," Grace said. "I just see what I need and I get it."

I laughed at that. I was beginning to see how very GRACE such a statement was.


I actually agree with that, if he means GRACE = unfun. As in, "I had a very GRACE time reading this book, because the writing is bad, and the plot basically consists of how much this teenage girl named Grace wants to bang the wolf in her backyard.""
December 29, 2017 –
page 106
27.18% "I stroked her hair with careful fingers, tracing a line from her forehead around her ear and down to just the top of her long neck, where her hair stopped being hair proper and was instead little baby fluffs that went every which way. They were fascinating, these soft feathers that would grow up to be hair. I was incredibly tempted to bend down and bite them...

"I want to nibble your baby fluffs.""
December 29, 2017 –
page 151
38.72% ""It's so hard to behave myself around you." He pushed away from me. "I don't know if I should keep staying with you. God, you're only, what - you're seventeen."

HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN SEVENTEEN?"
December 29, 2017 –
page 162
41.54% ""Ooh, a boy! Hi, Boy! Grace, I'm so HYPER. Coffee! Are you mad at me?"

TEEN SPEAK

UR DOIN IT RITE"
December 29, 2017 –
page 223
57.18% "Mom sounded suspicious; she wasn't used to me laughing.

AREN'T YOU JUST A BARREL OF FUN, GRACE
"
December 29, 2017 –
page 225
57.69% "THIS BITCH IS SLUT-SHAMING HER OWN MOM, NOW?

FUCK OFF, GRACE"
December 30, 2017 –
page 239
61.28% "Have I mentioned that I hate Grace???

Have I???

Have I???

Because I do, and she is more than free to join Cath from FANGIRL over in the FUCK YOU corner."
December 30, 2017 –
page 282
72.31% ""Well, it was love at first sight."

Yup, he saw her covered in blood after being mauled by wolves and thought to himself, "MAN, I have got to get me some of that. Hashtag SMELLGASM."

I'm not joking, btw. That is exactly what happened."
December 30, 2017 –
page 390
100.0% ""
December 30, 2017 – Finished Reading

Comments Showing 1-16 of 16 (16 new)

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A (Is For Awkward) YES I remember yelling at them to just move to arizona when I read this. Like really that is their idea of a solution?


Nenia ☠️ Khaleesi of Bodice Rippers, Protector of Out of Print Gems, Mother of Smut, and Actual Garbage Can ☠️ Campbell A (Is For Awkward) wrote: "YES I remember yelling at them to just move to arizona when I read this. Like really that is their idea of a solution?"

It was so weird!!! Why would one work but not the other? (view spoiler)


message 3: by Maraya21 (new) - added it

Maraya21 (The Reading Dragon) 😂😂😂😂♥♥


message 5: by O.R. (new) - added it

O.R. This author belongs to the group of basic YA authors that practically write the same thing esp the horrible heroine they excuse with feminism (she’s not horrible, she’s a feminism figure! Yeah nah.) and they all protect each other’s work. I don’t buy anything from this author, this sounds terrible.


Nenia ☠️ Khaleesi of Bodice Rippers, Protector of Out of Print Gems, Mother of Smut, and Actual Garbage Can ☠️ Campbell O.R. wrote: "This author belongs to the group of basic YA authors that practically write the same thing esp the horrible heroine they excuse with feminism (she’s not horrible, she’s a feminism figure! Yeah nah...."

See, I've read two of her books and I don't see either of the heroines as feminist figures. Grace is boy-crazy and kind of sociopathic, and Blue is a sarcastic little shit.


message 7: by O.R. (new) - added it

O.R. Yup.


message 9: by Ally (new)

Ally Yikes. And just as an FYI, I never finished The Raven Boys. I got bored. And decided that this author just probably wasn't my jam. That said, I love, love, love your review! Captain Cop-Out? Oh yes. Give me more.


Nenia ☠️ Khaleesi of Bodice Rippers, Protector of Out of Print Gems, Mother of Smut, and Actual Garbage Can ☠️ Campbell Ally wrote: "Yikes. And just as an FYI, I never finished The Raven Boys. I got bored. And decided that this author just probably wasn't my jam. That said, I love, love, love your review! Captain Cop-Out? Oh yes..."

LOL!!! Thanks, Ally. I'm glad you enjoyed my review! :D


Hayli "(I think they were actually trying to murder this demon spawn)" 😂😂 Your reviews slamming books kills me. Also, I love this review. <3 Keep on keepin' on, Nenia.


Nenia ☠️ Khaleesi of Bodice Rippers, Protector of Out of Print Gems, Mother of Smut, and Actual Garbage Can ☠️ Campbell Hayli wrote: ""(I think they were actually trying to murder this demon spawn)" 😂😂 Your reviews slamming books kills me. Also, I love this review. <3 Keep on keepin' on, Nenia."

Hahahah thank you, Hayli! I'm glad you enjoyed my review :D


Bobbi Jo IMO The Raven Boys was absolutely garbage. Shiver was aight, though.


Nenia ☠️ Khaleesi of Bodice Rippers, Protector of Out of Print Gems, Mother of Smut, and Actual Garbage Can ☠️ Campbell Bobbi wrote: "IMO The Raven Boys was absolutely garbage. Shiver was aight, though."

I didn't like either. XD I have LAMENT and ALL THE CROOKED SAINTS on my Kindle, which I'm a little afraid to read now.


Bobbi Jo Nenia ✨ Queen of Literary Trash, Protector of Out-of-Print Gems, Khaleesi of Bodice Rippers, Mother of Smut, the Unrepentant, Breaker of Convention ✨ wrote: "I didn't like either. XD I have LAMENT and ALL THE CROOKED SAINTS on my Kindle, which I'm a little afraid to rea..."

Honestly, unless I forget before the next book she publishes unrelated to the other garbage, I think I'm done with this author. She's... so... MEH!!!


Nenia ☠️ Khaleesi of Bodice Rippers, Protector of Out of Print Gems, Mother of Smut, and Actual Garbage Can ☠️ Campbell Yeah, I'm going to read what I have, but I'm thinking that her style so far is not compatible with what I look for in fiction.


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