Nichole's Reviews > Virtue

Virtue by Amanda Hocking
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's review
Aug 26, 2011

it was ok
bookshelves: kindle, owned, faerie-stories

Part of me feels guilty for giving this book such a low rating, but the holder of a BA degree in writing feels differently. A LOT differently. While I enjoyed this story and read through it quickly, there were several things that bothered me about it. The most glaring of these things is the overwhelming about of "telling v showing" that occurs throughout the book. As one of my favorite writing professors always said: "Don't tell me the woman walked across the street. Show it to me!"

One of these such lines is "For a moment, he was stuck completely mute by her beauty, and that response to her started him."

SHOW ME HE WAS STARTLED! How did he show he was startled? Did he stare at her with wide eyes? Did he stumble a bit? Catch his breath? I want to know how strongly Lux reacted to Lily's beauty rather than having the author use something so unemotional as "and that response to her startled him." How am I as a reader supposed to connect to Lux's emotion otherwise?

I could keep listing instances of this, but I think I'll just leave it at that. The number of typos and such throughout the text were also bothersome, though not so much as the telling. The characters were stock. Lily and Lux felt flat rather than fully rounded, and I didn't relate to their struggle at all. Wick was a bit more rounded in her desire to help and rescue Lily in memory of an old friend (Lily's mother), as was Gula in his readiness to help Lux regardless of what may happen to him in the end. Valefor, however, was a stock villian, as were his minions. I DID like the concept of the Sins and their opposite Virtues, but it wasn't expanded or developed enough to really excite me.

All in all, I'd recommend someone who was interested in a good read, but it's definitely not for someone who is always on the lookout for good literature.
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