Kiki's Reviews > Twilight

Twilight by Stephenie Meyer
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's review
Jul 28, 2010

did not like it
bookshelves: ya, books-to-use-as-weapons, ew-vampires-no, love-stinks, mayhem-and-misogyny
Recommended to Kiki by: A tween
Recommended for: Oh, God! No one!

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Reading Progress

08/05/2016 marked as: read

Comments (showing 1-50 of 72) (72 new)

Nicole True. Twilight's the mother of all bad ya novels out there.

message 2: by Cory (new) - rated it 1 star

Cory Win.

message 3: by Kiki (new) - rated it 1 star

Kiki Yes, Moorchild. Yes, I would.

Katie(babs) But Twilight has sparkly emo vampire boys who watch sleeping human girls as they hold back the urge to suck them dry. And they can jump from tree to tree. Total win.

message 5: by Cory (new) - rated it 1 star

Cory You guys are giving me some fucking weird imagery.

That being said, this review is still win.

message 6: by Kiki (new) - rated it 1 star

Kiki Cory. Cory, Cory, Cory.

Thanks, girl. You own.

message 7: by Sarah (new) - added it

Sarah Mostly I'm pissed at Twilight for neutering vampires. Once upon a time they were actually scary and cool. Now they're cuddly elves. Kill.

Rinoa Heartilly Your description of what Twilight is about actually reads like the blurb of a social comentary book. :D And much better than Twilight itself... But that was to be expected. x3

message 9: by Lissa (new)

Lissa Don't even get me started on this. I will rant and rant until I am blue in the face.
Thanks for the marvellous review. What took you so long?
PS Moorchild beat me to the punch.

message 10: by [deleted user] (new)

Awesome review :) Totally agree

message 11: by Kiki (new) - rated it 1 star

Kiki Sarah, I totes felt the lulz for your 'neutered vampires' comment. You win, girl.

Lissa, I took so long because I thought I'd never be able to put into words my overwhelming disgust for this book. Ms. Fitzpatrick has tried to frighten me into posting 'nice' reviews because apparently if I trash books their authors won't blurb mine. Quite frankly, I'd rather wing it than have Meyer's words on my cover. I don't want to be in the same room as her, let alone have her comments written on my work. No way, José.

message 12: by Lissa (new)

Lissa Ms. Fitzpatrick has tried to frighten me into posting 'nice' reviews because apparently if I trash books their authors won't blurb mine.

I certainly wouldn't want anyone I didn't truly admire blurbing my book, yeesh.
(Both my fav authors are dead, though, so there is no one left I 'truly admire'.)

message 13: by Kiki (last edited May 21, 2011 08:18PM) (new) - rated it 1 star


A million hugs. I'm actually amazed I managed to be this concise. I expected to be writing this review for hours. You should have seen me, though. I was burning up my keyboard as I tried to write fast enough to keep up with the rant in my brain.

message 14: by Kara (new) - rated it 4 stars

Kara You know..... I have to make a confession (so sorry for whom it may offend)

Twilight was the whole reason I started reading an actual book-with-no-pictures on my own account. I mean I used to despise reading, like why sit there when you could go shopping.....

Then the movie came out, it lead to the books, lead to my brief but influential obessession with vampires soo then I started reading every single type of vamp book

So to make this boring confession short, I am unable to hate this piece on pathetic monkeys and cuddly elves since it gave me reading

message 15: by [deleted user] (new)

I have been waiting so long for your review of twilight L! And it did not dissapoint. I actually saw the Twilight movie like a year ago and thought it was OK. And now, just so I can FINALLY see what all the big fuss is about, I want the book. I will notify you when I do, but if I have not written a review within the following two weeks, then what the negative reviews say is true and I scooped out my own eyeballs with a fork to end the torture.

Nalnac haha! Great review. Truly.
Although I believe is just a way of looking at it. But who cares about the (lack of) Meyer's writing ?! I don't. She gave us Edward. In the words of R.Kelly (often quoted by Mr Pattinson or Edward Cullen-face himself) "I don't see nothing wrong.." if teens/30something/40too fall a bit in love with a character that is so out of reach that is a myth on his own. That is all the Twilight I need/love/care about. the rest is just blah blah blah! :)

Nalnac oh..and I do know Mussolini. maybe only b/c I'm Italian :P

message 18: by Lisa (new) - rated it 1 star

Lisa Brava! I forgot to comment when I first "liked" your review. Well said. I'm glad that you decided to comment on Meyer's juvenile behavior in regards to Midnight Sun. Personally I think the world is better off without it but it was a really crappy thing to do to her fans.

message 19: by Kiki (last edited Jun 09, 2011 01:18PM) (new) - rated it 1 star

Kiki The whole sentence was "mainstream pseudo-pop band", Dan. There's a lot of truth in that statement. This is what I meant by 'sold out': If you listen to original Muse, then post-T-word Muse, what's the difference? A heck of a lot, that's what. They made the smooth transition from original rock to completely unoriginal pop, to please the masses who discovered their music. Now, whether or not this is a terrible thing isn't up to me. People have to make money to put food on the table, and if Muse have found a way to raise their sales, then more power to them. I guess I'm just disappointed after experiencing their amazing cover of 'Feeling Good' live, then years later buying the Resistance album and wanting to throw it in the trash.

There's absolutely nothing wrong with being popular, but when you start changing yourself to top the charts, there's an issue.

What did the Muse aside have to do with the rest of your rant? You literally just answered your own question. Muse was pimped out by Twilight. I'm sorry if I offended you, because there's nothing wrong with Muse, they're not a bad band and I still listen to them from time to time, but there's no overlooking the stark contrast between then (unknown, fresh Muse) and now (been-there-done-that Muse).

If you don't agree, that's fine. I'm not arguing with you. Also, thanks for the whole I shall disappear as swiftly as a sparkling vampire-man. That was all kinds of LOL.

message 20: by [deleted user] (new)

You should read Divergent by Veronica Roth. The relationships in the book are actually plausible and possible, where there are equal gender rights!

Diana~ God, I love your reviews! They are so entertaining, funny, and true.

message 22: by Drake (new) - rated it 1 star

Drake AMEN!

message 23: by Rose (new) - rated it 2 stars

Rose Wow, i have a whole new view on Twilight now. I kinda agree with your friend Taylor - the book is kinda sweet, but there's too many bad things in the book (the caveman/cavewoman-parts, the unrealistic, edward-cullen-is-god-thing, etc.).

Nikki So Kira is there any YA book you do like? I guess I could take the time to check out your other reviews. Also Muse was pretty big in Europe before making it big here. Who is the really say they wouldn't have exploded in time in the US without Meyer's influence? Also where did you get "She looks down on girls who appreciate shopping and physical intimacy, as well as women who cannot have children." I have read Twilight numerous times and can not recall her look down on girls like this.

message 25: by Kiki (new) - rated it 1 star

Kiki Nikki wrote: "So Kira is there any YA book you do like? I guess I could take the time to check out your other reviews. Also Muse was pretty big in Europe before making it big here. Who is the really say they wou..."

I'm not going to address your first question, because I can't understand why you'd ask me that, then state that you haven't read any of my other reviews. That's just redundant. Let's not go there.

Bella is constantly trivializing her friends and their interests, and basically, don't get me started on the way that Bella treats her friends. Also, in New Moon (or Eclipse, can't remember which one) she remarks that Leah is "not as much of a woman as she should be" because she can't have children. Now, where I come from, being unable to have children DOES NOT make you less of a woman, and to think that it does is wrong. It is not an opinion, it is wrong.

I see that you rated the book with five stars. I appreciate your contribution, but if you came here wanting to antagonize me don't bother. I would never, ever go to your review and tell you that you are wrong. Your review is your review, and mine is mine. Please don't come here looking for a fight, because I'm not interested.

message 26: by Kiki (new) - rated it 1 star

Kiki Cillian, I'm confused, darling.

message 27: by Kiki (new) - rated it 1 star

Kiki BAHA.

Yeah, I seem to have misplaced it...must check and see if I left it under my crossbow.

message 28: by John (new) - rated it 1 star

John Egbert Now, where I come from, being unable to have children DOES NOT make you less of a woman,

Oddly enough, this is the case where I come from as well. Maybe we're secretly twins!

message 29: by Kiki (new) - rated it 1 star

Kiki I often wonder that, Mello. I do.

message 30: by Kiki (last edited Aug 04, 2011 08:37AM) (new) - rated it 1 star


You're BB. You can do whatever the hell you want. Incest? Pah! Just 'cause others aren't badass enough to do it...

message 31: by Roxy (new) - rated it 1 star

Roxy Oh thank goodness I'm not the only one who's confused about the Twilight craze. This is best twilight review I'v eread. You've made me laugh.

message 32: by John (new) - rated it 1 star

John Egbert My bewilderment cannot be expressed in words. Or cute letter emoticons.

message 33: by John (new) - rated it 1 star

John Egbert I said MAYBE, Cillian, MAYBE.

message 34: by John (new) - rated it 1 star

John Egbert Orly?

message 36: by Kiki (new) - rated it 1 star

Kiki AHA! Touché, BB! Touché!

message 37: by John (new) - rated it 1 star

John Egbert Ha ha, I win again!

message 38: by John (new) - rated it 1 star

John Egbert Don't deny itttttt...

message 39: by Kiki (new) - rated it 1 star

Kiki I have never won anything as awesome as a Playmobil in a raffle. What the hell raffle was this?!

message 40: by John (new) - rated it 1 star

John Egbert Cillian wrote: "The last time you won something, was in kindergarten, Mocha and I took you to see a play (the one you refused to perform in because the hat you had to wear for your part, didn't have enough flowers..."

Wait, what?

message 41: by John (new) - rated it 1 star

John Egbert You know I won that Playmobil fair and square.

And I didn't want that hat because it didn't have enough flowers; it was way too small. I needed a bigger one than everybody else's so they would know who I am. A WINNER.

message 42: by John (new) - rated it 1 star

John Egbert Well you don't have to do that...

message 43: by Elizabetha (new) - added it

Elizabetha I HATE, HATE, HATE with all my heart, soul, body, mind the bored and nasty book called literary world is worst because of Stephenie Meyer's unimaginative, stupid and dull "so call story"

I laughed a lot with your review


message 44: by K. (new) - rated it 2 stars

K. I can't clap my hands loud enough for this review. You make so many great points, each of them the very reason why I detest the books. What you say about Bella having no hobbies, goals and interests...*applause*. There is literally nothing to her except the Edward factor. One big thing for me was what the books say about know, life, this gift given to us. Bella was not only willing but eager to become an undead; to give up her future, her opportunity to achieve something, anything to be a vampire. WHO THE FUCK? I can tell you that I was POSITIVE that she was going to end up with Jacob because I thought there was no way she was going to be a vampire. I kept waiting for the morality of it all, and I waited and waited and waited...and when she eventually, or shall I say unavoidably (but please know I'm rolling my eyes at that) had to be turned it was such a fucking cop out.

Although, Muse did later admit they regretted being on the soundtrack. I don't judge them for that. All musicians do it. How were they to know what they were signing up for? I guess maybe they should've read the books...

message 45: by Mimi (new)

Mimi I love you.There I said it.I don't know how you have survived after this review,but it only took me to say "Glittery Vamps" and two Twi-lovers went berserk on me.It's amazing that nobody bombarded your house.

message 47: by [deleted user] (new)

love this review. Soooo true. super entertaining too! :)
I mean, vampires used to be the sort of monster that you had nightmares about, and now girls daydream about then? so not right. Half our generation has no idea the history of vampires, or the horrifying stories there are! Someone needs to educate these kids, and vampires aren't the only thing I'm talking about here! History is being distorted!!!
Sorry, that was my rant.
Oh, love the feminist take you had on this book! You go girl!

message 48: by Chris (last edited Nov 28, 2011 03:07AM) (new)

Chris This review slightly restored my faith in the future of humanity. Although reading you used to be a fan of muse kind of blunted it again.

message 49: by Tami (new) - rated it 1 star

Tami I wish I could forward this review to 98% of the girls I know. But finally after two days of sex-ed in school, my friends realized that Twishit was nothing more than the infatuation of Mary-Sue and her creepy ass boyfriend.

The scary thing, is that I had a friend in 8th grade who told me that any cute guy breaking into her window and watching her sleep without her permission was romantic.

Oh, I wish at my high school two sassy guys got best couple. But I live in Conservapedia so that will never happen. For goodness sake, the school GSA club was flamed and harassed over Facebook.

Goddamn, I need to reread this book and write a review.

Cat *living for the One who breaths life into me* i totally respect you thoughts about the book and though i liked the book i do agree that Bella can be very whiney, needy, annoying, and Edward-obessed. i understand that it isn't everyones cup of tea. :) and yeah, the writting is pretty bad. there are so many flaws in this series but overall i like them even though they are vastly flawed and shallow and stupid and go agaisnt a lot of things i agree with :)

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