May 03, 2018
May 03, 2018
it was amazing
”Most adults see teenagers as confused kids who don’t understand much, while they’re the pillars of knowledge and experience and know exactly what is ”Most adults see teenagers as confused kids who don’t understand much, while they’re the pillars of knowledge and experience and know exactly what is right at all times.”
It’s kind of funny how much this quote resonates with me even though I’m an adult in every sense of the word. I go to work, I pay my rent, I buy groceries for my family, I have a kid, ... So how come this book was such a perfect read for me? Well, the truth is, I am an adult but that doesn’t stop me from doing the things I love (for instance writing poetry and reviews) and maybe this has kept me kind of young? I dunno. XD I think I might not be your typical adult but then again who is?
I guess you can already tell that this book made me think a lot and I have so many thoughts and feelings it’s quite a challenge to put them all into words. There were so many topics and situations that spoke to me and no matter if it was Jimmy’s POV as a musician, Angel’s POV as part of the fandom, the diversity and reps or the relationships between all of those lovely characters, I could relate to all of them! *lol* This book reminded me so much of my own youth and my life in general that it almost felt like Alice Oseman wrote it just for me. Like seriously! Alice how do you do this?
I just loved every second of “I Was Born for This” and I never wanted it to end! If you ask me it could have had a 1.000 pages and it still wouldn’t have been enough. XD I have so many thoughts it feels almost impossible to get them all down on
This is my spoilery spoiler warning and if you haven’t read the book yet, I’d recommend to turn around and to head in the other direction. *lol* Far be it from me to let my fellow readers jump into this unprepared. ;-)
Fereshteh “Angel” Rahimi:
”And I know they’re both worried about my future. They don’t ever say it, but I know they know I’m average and average is disappointing for them. Especially compared to my brother. The pinnacle of ambition and success.”
First of all I have to say how much I loved Angel’s true name! Fereshteh is such a beautiful name and if you ask me I’d have preferred her to go with her real name instead of Angel. <3 This said I really liked Angel and how she always tried to help everyone. She was such a kind and gentle soul and even though she had no idea what she wanted to do in life she was still a very strong character and able to stand up for herself. That argument she had with her parents broke my heart because I was about the same age when I had a similar conflict with my parents and I think they only just realized that I became a person who had its own opinion about things. XD I’m sure one day my kid and I will have such an argument too and I can only hope that she’ll know that I love her no matter what. I’m pretty sure that’s something every child and parent will have to go through. They grow up so fast and they steal your heart the moment you see them. Why am I getting all sappy now? *lol* Never mind! Let’s continue! I kinda liked the scene when Mac confronted Angel about being a “fandom celebrity” because *lol* that’s me whenever some of my GR friends claim that I’m popular on here. (Like what?!) And just for the record: I don’t think I am. I just write my reviews. That’s it. ;-) Or to say it with Angel’s words: “It’s just the internet.” *shrugs* Also I could relate to her feeling average. It’s hard to have an older sibling that is perfect in every sense of the way. Been there, done that, got the freaking t-shirt. *lol* So yeah Angel’s POV really hit home. XD
”Well, I didn’t realise you were some sort of fandom celebrity,” he says with the fakest smile I’ve ever seen.
I laugh at him. “That’s a massive overstatement.”
”I don’t know who I am. Everything I do feels like a lie. I wake up every day and I have to be Jimmy Kaga-Ricci, this famous guy, and I have to smile at the camera and say hi to people but ... I don’t even know who I am underneath that.”
Jimmy’s struggle is so real! I really liked Jimmy because he felt and thought so much about everything! His anxiety was tough to witness and even though I have no experience with anxiety in the way Jimmy feels it I know exactly how it feels to have a panic attack or a mental breakdown. Jimmy is a truly beautiful person inside and out but I think he had to go through a lot of shit when he came out as transgender and I’m pretty sure that only increased his anxiety. If you’re a public person to come out can be so much worse because everyone and their grandma knows it. And there will always be haters... no matter if you’re a nobody like me or a public person. Shitstorms can be so much worse when you’re the latter though. So it’s no wonder Jimmy almost broke under the pressure and I’m glad he decided to pull in the reins. The Ark came so far, they are popular enough to do what THEY want to do. ;-) I can’t help but wonder if idols or stars really feel like they’re living a lie. I mean there happens a lot that’s off screen and we never get to see it but if they really feel like they’re a fraud that would make me kind of sad. =S Guess we’ll never know.
”No, you don’t fucking know that, Rowan.” I raise my voice. “I’m not going to just sit and wait for things to change any more. I’m changing things. I’m doing what I want for once.”
”Why else would anyone want to be around me?” he says. “I’m Lister Bird. Why else would anyone want to be around me other than to get with me?”
Ahh poor Lister! He’s definitely the visual of the group and apparently has many fangirls. It’s no surprise that he’s obviously feeling very lonely though. Jimmy’s and Rowan’s friendship is very strong and he only ended up in the band because he could play drums. So I can totally see why he’d feel left out and not as much a part of the group as the other two. He basically had no one to talk to so it’s no wonder he became a party boy and got drunk. It was his escape from the things he had to deal with but it certainly wasn’t a healthy way to handle the pressure. Many stars seem to go down that road and it makes me really sad whenever I hear that they ended up in rehab. Lister is aware of his problems though so I hope Rowan and Jimmy will help him to find his way back into a life without alcohol.
”Sorry, sorry, I didn’t mean to shout at you. I’m just tired.” He puts the near-empty bottle down on the sink next to me, and then pats me gently on the cheek. “Hey. Jimmy. Sorry.” Then he wraps his arms around my shoulders and hugs me tightly. “Sorry for always being shit.”
The relationships & ships:
Angel & Jimmy:
”As we’re forcing our way out of the crowd, Jimmy clutches onto my hoodie with one hand, like a scared toddler. Is this weird? Probably. I love him more than my own fucking life.
When I visualized their first meeting I definitely didn’t imagine them being scared shitless in a public toilet/bathroom. And I certainly didn’t see Jimmy with a knife in his hands, yet this is exactly what happened. *lol* Oh boy! Whenever I think about that scene I imagine myself meeting BTS in a toilet like that and haha to say it would make me super uncomfortable would be putting it mildly. XD What I know for certain is that I would try to speak with them and to ease their tension though. Angel did a great job considering the circumstances and I really loved her for helping Jimmy the way she did. Because quite honestly, if I would have no kid and no adult life I would help BTS like that too. Or well, even with my kid I’d probably invite them over to my flat and give them a safe space to crash and to calm down. (As long as they don’t tidy up my flat... *lol* Come to think of it 7 pairs of helping hands would be welcome though. ;-P) I know Jimmy’s grandfather would think we only do this because we have no life but I assure you: I have a life and I love and respect myself. That doesn’t mean that I can’t be kind to celebrities I never saw in person though. They are only human and if they are scared I will help them. Period. Angel and Jimmy might have a strange kind of friendship but they are there for each other and this is what counts in the end. The conversation they had about being a part of each other’s truth was really well written and I loved this scene so much. Music is a part of me and the people that make the music I adore are ultimately a part of me as well. So in that sense we’re all connected with our idols somehow. =) It’s a beautiful thought.
”You are ... the damn light of my life,” I tell him. “When everything is bad, when I wake up and want to go back to sleep and never wake up, you’re there for me.”
“I’m not,” he whispers.
“You are.” I swallow nervously. “If you want it to end ... I understand.” I pat my chest. “But ... I guess ... you’re ending a part of me too.”
“Part of you?”
“Without you ... without The Ark ... all I have is my dull life. You’re one of the few things I had in my life that was good and true. You’re part of my truth.”
He blinks. “You’re part of mine too.”
Jimmy & Rowan:
”How you doing, Jimjam?”
“What?” I ask, not understanding the question.
He squeezes my arms, then rubs them soothingly. “Are you calm?”
Now let’s talk about the pic of Rowan and Jimmy sleeping together in their bed. *lol* OR let’s just talk about how close they are as friends! I mean it’s so obvious that they love each other a lot, just not in the way the fandom wants them to. There’s no Jowan, but I really adored their interactions and how much they seemed to care about each other. You can see that they are really close and that they are super comfortable around each other. I’m like that with my besties too and a very cuddly person. (Do whatever you want with that random info. *lol*) So for me to see their strong bond was really nice and even though they argued quite a lot in the ending it was only because they cared so much about each other. =)
”Jesus fucking Christ, I thought you’d been kidnapped. Thank God I still remember your fucking home phone number. God, look at you, sleeping in this tiny bed with a knife on your bedside table. Like, you could hurt yourself. God.”
The fandom rep:
”Neither of us have any friends in real life who like The Ark, but that doesn’t matter, because we have each other. I used to try to get people to talk about The Ark with me – my school friends, my parents, my older brother – but no one really cared.
I loved the interview they gave when they said “the fans like to overthink everything we do” and I had to agree so much! *lol* I mean JK shows his eye tattoo in an episode of RUN and ARMYs be like: OMG!!! WHAT DOES IT MEAN!!?? I’m ARMY myself so I can laugh about this and say that we’re all clowns. *lol* Anyway, what I want to say with this is that the fandom rep was so damn on spot I can’t even! Haha! Alice Oseman captured it so well and I loved that by inventing Juliet and Angel she also gave room to the fandom side that’s not just screaming and fainting fangirls/boys. You’d be surprised about how many of us are actually normal people that just love our boys and their music. XD If I’d get a chance to spend a day with BTS I’d probably just hang out with them, eat good food, play silly games and talk about God and the world. Maybe I could even persuade them to play guitar or e-bass with me? *lol* So yeah, pretty normal stuff. Also since my kid is so little she’d probably be the star in the room and they’d play and goof around with her. XD Because no matter how famous they are, they are still normal (okay, they are perfect!) people and I totally agree with the sentiment that they feel like they are my friends. In difficult times their music helps me to get through the day and they always make me smile which is pretty amazing. =) So if you ever come to Austria and read this BTS, write me and I’ll invite you over for a schnitzel and potato salad. Considering the dumpling incident I better don’t invite you for roast pork and dumplings though. *lol* ;-P
”They’re not like normal musicians. It feels like they’re our friends and they understand us and care about us.”
The musician rep:
”A lot of them only like us because we have nice faces. But as long as we are here, the three of us, and we get to make music, and we get to live this life – playing our music in a new city every week, bringing smiles to millions of faces, leaving our mark upon the world – then everything is good, and fine, and okay.”
As a former member of a band to read this rep made me very happy. It was so accurate and I think in the end we all just want to make music and to hang out together. A band is like a family. You spend so much time with your members that you know each other’s habits, hopes and fears. Sometimes you’ll be stuck together for weeks but you don’t care because as long as you’re together and making music everything is alright. You hug, you cry, you comfort each other, you hang out together, you cuddle, you laugh and joke. And you’re very close to each other and have a unique bond which many fans will ship because they think there has to be more to it. *lol* I don’t even know how many people shipped my bestie and me during band times but since even one of our teachers shipped us... well you get the idea. *lol* He was always just my bestie though. Like a brother. We went through thick and thin and even though our band doesn’t exist anymore (he moved to Germany) and we both have a family and lives that keep us busy, we’re still close and stay in contact. This said the musician rep of “I Was Born for This” was perfect and felt really personal. <3 So thank you Alice for writing it in this book! =)
”The three of us ... we were born to be together,” I say. “And I can’t leave that. I don’t want to leave that.”
This book was made for me! I loved it so much and I’m sure it will always be one of my all-time favourites. =) The way Alice Oseman captured fandoms, showed the lives of musicians and represented anxiety was amazing and as always her character cast was super diverse. I’m so glad Alice writes books and I’ll continue to read everything she publishes. She has a rare gift and I’m thankful she shares it with the world. XD
Notes are private!
Feb 14, 2021
Feb 01, 2021
Nov 22, 2016
Nov 22, 2016
it was amazing
*A forever grateful thank you to NetGalley and “Cathedral Rock Press” for providing a free ARC*
”They shared breath, poised on a shared edge, shaking a *A forever grateful thank you to NetGalley and “Cathedral Rock Press” for providing a free ARC*
”They shared breath, poised on a shared edge, shaking all their separate pieces into one.”
Do you know the kind of book that swallows you whole? That makes you want to pick it up even though it’s in the middle of the night and you just closed it. The sort of story that takes over your mind, body and soul? The kind that makes you restless and achy with the need to continue? This special sort of book that touches you on such a profound and fundamental level your heart quite literally bursts from hurting, but, boy it hurts so good?!
“An Exaltation of Larks” was everything of the above and so, so, so much more! I had no idea what I was getting myself into until it was already too late. Until I found myself so deeply immersed in this story that it seemed to be impossible to get away from its words. They followed me around, taunted me, teased me, wanted to be read with such a relentless fervour that I couldn’t even think about uttering the word “no”.
”All his movements were clumsy and reluctant. His fingers balked at tying his sneakers. Turned locks the wrong way while opening the door. He stumbled going down the hall and the elevator door banged him on the elbow as it was closing.
He didn’t want to go.”
That’s exactly how this book made me feel and even after finishing it two weeks ago it still didn’t let me go. This story swept me off my feet, dug its claws into my skin and sang me to sleep. And to be entirely honest, this effect is still going on. By now I think “An Exaltation of Larks” was written to bury itself in my soul so that I would never feel alone again. And if that is truly the case then all I can say is that it can have every inch of my heart it conquered.
”Many people like being alone, but nobody likes to be lonely.”
There are so many things I loved about this book, so many in fact that I don’t even know where to start. I adored Val and Alex, I worshipped Jav, whose character was so similar to mine that it sometimes felt like torture to read on. I connected with him on such a basic level that it killed me to accompany him on his difficult journey. But just like him I longed for more and no matter how much I got, I just couldn’t get enough. Of the strong friendships in this book, of the relationships between the characters, of the family they became. I swear the relationships in this book were everything!!! Just everything!! The humour, the banter, I loved how they joked, how comfortable they were around each other, how effortlessly those two families merged into one.
”Te lo agradezco mucho,” Alex said.
“You don’t have to thank me.”
“No sé cómo agradecértelo.”
“Stop.” Jav kissed his head. “You guys are my family. I’d do anything.”
He kissed Val’s head. Then six arms wove and wrapped and they held each other tight.
There are three people that found each other because they were meant to, because destiny had chosen them before they even knew it themselves and they love each other so deeply, so madly, so unconditionally that it broke my heart. The way Suanne let them deal with their troubles, how they acted around each other, how they were angry and mad but still so very much in love. How they fought for their love, how they realized that they had to accept their feelings with all their consequences, weaknesses and flaws. It just blew me away!! Suanne can write! And it’s so convincing, so realistic that it killed me. The chemistry of those characters, the cozy atmosphere, the strong feeling of belonging, of kinship and above all else the affection and love that connects them all.
”It’s not the Larks that kill you. It’s the exaltation.”
I swear at times I was so overwhelmed with emotion that I felt so fragile you could have shattered me with a soft breeze. Val’s and Alex’s marriage was so wonderful, yet I also loved the idea of Alex and Jav. To be entirely honest, the mere thought of all of them together kind of blew my mind and I suppose in some way or another those three actually kind of were in some sort of relationship. They were so connected, it was hard to even imagine them not being involved with each other and their children Ari and Deane only seemed to add to that intense sensation of all-encompassing love.
”I want you to be all right. I wanted that long before all this other stuff showed up. I wanted you to stay in Guelisten, I wanted my home to be your home. A place where you feel good. A place you can come as yourself and bring along your happiness and your pain. I wanted you around since the beginning.”
Of course none of those characters had it easy, because as we all know life may be described with an abundance of words but “easy” is certainly none of them. This said there are quite a lot of serious topics that are tackled by Suanne and they were woven so gently into the rug of this story that you don’t know where the seam begins or ends. They are as much a part of the book as they are a part of the characters and I’m still in awe of the author’s ability to let those stories speak for themselves. “The Disappeared” of Chile, 9/11 and its effects, the way our family and our personal history shapes us. I’m not ashamed to admit that I cried throughout the entire chapter that dealt with 9/11 and that the only thing that made it better was to remind myself of the things that are good in this world. Namely, a short peek at my kid while she was fast asleep in her bed. This chapter wrecked me, big time, as did so many other moments in this book... ¡Vale! I just had to take a deep breath because my emotions are still all over the place and I’m pretty certain this will never change.
”It caught Jav under the ribs and his teeth trembled together. He felt the ground tilt beneath his feet. His heart flailed, making desperate minute adjustments, frantically trying to find center. Find his way home, even as home insisted it was here. Right here in this house. With Alex.”
So this was my rather futile attempt to convey how much this book means to me and I can’t help but feel like I failed miserably. There is no way to put all of those emotions into words and if I’d live a million years I still wouldn’t be able to describe this painful contentment that I feel. “Therapy Fiction”, “Contemporary Train Wreck”, “Emotionally Intelligent Romance” those are all terms that are used to describe Suanne’s books. Well, I guess I have a new one for you: “Heart-breaking Realism”.
Make of that what you want, but I can guarantee you one thing: If you read this, you will never be the same again. All the stars! All the stars, por siempre jamás!
There’s no possession that’s more valuable than your soul.
Yet I think I might have just given mine to this book.
Pero no lamento nada.
Or to say it with Suanne’s words:
”¿Por qué encender una cerilla cuando puedes incendiar la casa?"
I FREAKING LOVED THIS!!! Capital letters!
Full RTC once I learned to deal with the fact that my soul belongs to a book (and Suanne?) now. *lol*
It’s rare to come across a book on goodreads that only has about 1.450 ratings but still managed to get an overall rating of 4,52 stars.
Is this book really that good?! O_o
I couldn’t help but ask myself this very question and when I discovered that it was on NetGalley I was determined to find out. XD
So thank you NetGalley and Cathedral Rock Press for offering me “An Exaltation of Larks” to read and review.
Fictional contemporary stories that stretch over decades are one of my favourite things and I can’t wait to dive into this. Also apparently this story has an LGBT fiction element as well?!
Colour me intrigued and let me read this book! ;-)
I hope this is going to be a good one! XD
P.S: I read the first few chapters and so far it's really great! ...more
Notes are private!
Jun 22, 2020
Jul 14, 2020
Jun 22, 2020
Jun 13, 2017
May 29, 2018
it was amazing
”Evelyn always leaves you hoping you’ll get just a little bit more. And she always denies you.”
This book was so, so, so GOOD!! I swear I was barely tw ”Evelyn always leaves you hoping you’ll get just a little bit more. And she always denies you.”
This book was so, so, so GOOD!! I swear I was barely two pages in and already knew that I’d love it with all my heart! <3 There’s just something about that golden Hollywood era that captivated me right from the beginning and once Evelyn entered the scene I was a goner. I just loved the way her story was told!
We didn’t only get the interviews with Monique but also were able to read news articles about her life and this made everything so much more intriguing. I mean “Hollywood Digest”, “Sub Rosa” or the “New York Tribune”, they all wrote about Evelyn’s life and those articles give an authenticity that makes this book feel real. It could have happened, Evelyn could have been a real Hollywood Star and people could have been as fascinated by her as by Marilyn Monroe or Marlene Dietrich.
I think to some degree Taylor Jenkins Reid might have even had Marilyn Monroe in her mind when she wrote Evelyn’s character and knowing how awesome Marilyn was this really doesn’t come as a surprise. XD Another thing I appreciated was that every husband got a part of this book and even though there were seven of them, who all influenced Evelyn and left a mark on her character, none of them actually was her one true love. It’s a very particular approach to a great story and I loved the way it was carried out.
Still, after I read the ending my mind was reeling and my feelings were so mixed that I had a tough time coming to terms with everything that was revealed. There were so many things I felt conflicted about and even now, after more than a week has passed, I still didn’t manage to sort out my feelings and I still don’t know what to do with them. Maybe I’ll have to get used to the idea that to think about Evelyn Hugo and her seven husbands will always make me feel conflicted and that there’s no such thing as making peace with an ending like that.
And maybe, just maybe, that was Taylor Jenkins Reid’s plan all along. ;-)
Welcome to my characters section, aka “The spoilery spoiler zone”! If you didn’t read the book yet and still want to be surprised by its revelations you better don’t continue to read my review. I’m worse than any tabloid mentioned in this book and I’ll spoil you relentlessly! If you still want to read my gossip, go ahead, but don’t say I didn’t warn you! ;-P
”And I didn’t say I was confessing any sins. To say that what I have to tell is a sin is misleading and hurtful. I don’t feel regret for the things I’ve done – at least, not the things you might expect – despite how hard they may have been or how repugnant they may seem in the cold light of day.”
Oh, Evelyn! Where do I even begin? I loved that woman so damn much, I can’t even! <333 It’s so rare to meet such a complex character in a book but damn Evelyn just had it all! She was neither white nor black, and if anything she was all different shades of grey. I loved that she was so ruthless, that she did what she had to do in order to get what she wanted, that she was unapologetic about her decisions and behaviour and that she never held back and just wanted it all! Celia was right, at times Evelyn could be really awful and egoistic, but damn did her good qualities make up for it. Compassionate, caring and protective of the ones she loved she would have done everything possible to keep them safe and happy. Gosh, WHAT. A. WOMAN! I think I might be in love with her! <333
”Did I want to make as much money as Don? Of course I did. I wanted to get the paycheck and mail a copy of it to him with a photo of my middle finger. But mostly I wanted the freedom to do whatever I wanted.”
”I told her every single day that her life had been the world’s greatest gift to me, that I believed I was put on earth not to make movies or wear emerald-green gowns and wave at crowds but to be her mother.”
”I regret every second I didn’t spend with her. I regret every stupid thing I did that caused her an ounce of pain. I should have chased her down the street the day she left me. I should have begged her to stay. I should have apologized and sent roses and stood on top of the Hollywood sign and shouted, ‘I’m in love with Celia St. James!’ and let them crucify me for it.”
Celia St. James:
”I really like you. I like watching you on-screen. I like how the moment you show up in a scene, I can’t look at anything else. I like the way your skin is too dark for your blond hair, the way the two shouldn’t go together and yet seem so natural on you. And to be honest, I like how calculating and awful you kind of are.”
Now here’s the thing, I know that Celia was the love of Evelyn’s life and I could see that they loved each other deeply, but – and here comes the huge BUT – I had the feeling that I could never truly connect to her. I don’t know what it was that kept me from adoring her the way I adore Evelyn but I think it might have been the sum of thousands of little things that ultimately left a bad taste in my mouth. For instance I hated that Evelyn always seemed to feel like she had done something wrong and that it was her responsibility to set things right again. I mean Celia threw a lot of awful things at her too, but in the end it always seemed to be Evelyn that blamed herself for it. Also I didn’t like that Celia wasn’t only self-righteous but also more than just a little judgemental. You’d think a person who represents the “L” in LGBTQ+ would be more accepting and open-minded when her partner is bi, but nope Celia was almost as bi-phobic as the men in Evelyn’s life and that made me really sad. =(
”That was how it was with Celia. When you denied her what she wanted, when you hurt her, she made sure you hurt, too.”
”So I told myself that the spark between Celia and me was just a quirk we had. Which was convincing as long as it remained quirky.
Sometimes reality comes crashing down on you. Other times reality simply waits, patiently, for you to run out of the energy it takes to deny it.”
”I want to be with someone I love. I want to have a companion. I’d like to bring someone home to my family. I don’t want to live alone anymore. And I want a son or a daughter. We could have that together. I can’t give you everything. I know that. But I want to raise a family, and I’d love to raise one with you.”
Aside from Evelyn, Harry Cameron was truly the best thing about this entire book! <33 I loved this man so much and I think he’s an angel! He was always respectful and supportive and even more important he accepted Evelyn exactly the way she was. I loved that he and Evelyn always tried to solve every problem together and I hated to see him so sad after the death of John. T_T Harry’s grief broke my heart and even though he was drinking way too much he never did anything stupid. I mean he never hurt Evelyn or got frustrated with her, he only tried to compensate his grief without hurting anyone else in the process. Even when it came to this he was considerate and kind. =(( Poor Harry, though. It made me so damn sad that he had to go and I admit it, I actually shed some tears when he died. T_T
”Why, until this moment, did I not realize that the issue is my own confidence? That the root of most of my problems is that I need to be secure enough in who I am to tell anyone who doesn’t like it to go fuck themselves? Why have I spent so long settling for less when I know damn well the world expects more?”
To say their relationship was complicated would be putting it more than just mildly! It was really interesting to see Monique’s character arc though. I mean at the beginning she was a shy mouse that didn’t dare to say anything to her boss and by the end of the book she was a young successful woman who stood up for herself and finally had the guts to make decisions she never even dared to consider. I think that to get to know Evelyn and to find out the truth behind her father’s death was necessary to find her happiness and I’m convinced that both of those things were able to give her some closure. I could understand her anger towards Evelyn, her hurt when she found out what she had done and the inability to truly hate her for it. Because she got to know the person behind the movie star and she knew how broken Evelyn was on the inside, how much pain she had suffered, how much loss she had endured. =( Still, that scene when she pondered whether to get on the train or not, the thoughts that crossed her mind, her inner struggle how to deal with the situation at hand. Damn, this was one of the best book moments I ever had the pleasure to read. Well done, Taylor Jenkins Reid, well done! I had goose bumps following that inner conflict. *shudders*
”I’m Evelyn.” She reaches out and takes my hand, shaking it. It strikes me as a unique form of power to say your own name when you know that everyone in the room, everyone in the world, already knows it.”
”I insist that you be ruthless in your negotiating, Monique. Make them pay you what they would pay a white man. And then, once you’ve done that, every penny from it will be yours.”
The relationships & ships:
Evelyn & Celia:
”I wanted to give her a lot of things. I wanted what I had to be hers. I wondered if this was what it felt like to love someone.”
Those two were the death of me, I swear! Their ups and downs, their struggles and fights, their love and dreams, their hopes and shattered realities. ARGH! It was so obvious they loved each other, yet they could never be together. Because the world didn’t let them and wouldn’t have understood, because they didn’t want the same thing, because they weren’t ready to be in a relationship and unable to make arrangements. Because… just BECAUSE! There was always another reason why they couldn’t be happy, another misunderstanding that tore at their foundations, another bump on the road that caused them to drift apart. They loved and lost and loved and lost again. It was so heart-breaking to watch! And Celia, she killed me. With everything she said to Evelyn! I knew she loved her, yet she hurt her so much! >_< I just wished she would have had more sympathy for Evelyn’s outlook and I really wish she would have tried to understand Evelyn’s sexuality. So many of their problems could have been solved, they could have gained so many years if they just would have allowed themselves to be who they are. Their love was so tragic… more tragic than any of the movies they produced over the years. And it really made me sad. T_T
”Evelyn, who was your great love? You can tell me.”
Evelyn looks out the window, breathes in deeply, and then says, “Celia St. James.”
The room is quiet as Evelyn lets herself hear her own words. And then she smiles, a bright, wide, deeply sincere smile. She starts laughing to herself and then refocuses on me. “I feel like I spent my entire life loving her.”
”It’s not wrong,” Celia said. “It shouldn’t be wrong, to love you. How can it be wrong?”
“It’s not wrong, sweetheart. It’s not,” I said. “They’re wrong.”
”If you love someone enough, you should be able to overcome anything,” she said. “And we have always loved each other so much, more than I ever thought I could be loved, more than I ever thought I could love. So why … why couldn’t we overcome it?”
“We did,” I said, turning towards her. “We’re here.”
She shook her head. “But the years,” she said.
”There’s a difference between sexuality and sex. I used sex to get what I wanted. Sex is just an act. Sexuality is a sincere expression of desire and pleasure. That I always kept for Celia.”
Evelyn & Harry:
”You do not know how fast you have been running, how hard you have been working, how truly exhausted you are, until someone stands behind you and says, “It’s OK, you can fall down now. I’ll catch you.”
So I fell down.
And Harry caught me.
Their friendship was everything, absolutely E.V.E.R.Y.T.H.I.N.G.!!! Gosh, I loved their relationship so much, I can’t even!!! They were so perfect together and understood each other better than anyone else. They were so close it sometimes felt like they could read each other’s mind and I think of all the husbands Evelyn married over the years, Harry definitely was the best! <333 (Of course her last hubby was awesome too but if you ask me no one was able to hold a candle to Harry!) I know Harry was gay and had no sexual desire for women and I know that Evelyn loved Celia but damn those two made so much sense! They shared a love that is sometimes even harder to find than the once in a lifetime love we all crave for and they were so much more than just friends. They were business partners, equals, best friends, partners in crime, confidants, soul mates and kindred spirits. And most importantly, they loved each other deeply! <333 It’s so rare to find a friend like that, so rare to have a connection like that, to be loved liked that… ARGH! I just LOVED them!!! This was such a wholesome representation of a deep friendship and I’m incapable to put it into words. *breaks down and sobs*
”I promise I’ll do whatever I can. I promise you we will figure this out.”
“OK,” Harry said, and then he squeezed my hand back and walked out the door. “We will figure this out.”
”I want you to stay, Harry. We need you. Me and Connor.” I grabbed his hand tighter. “But if you have to go, then go. Go if it hurts. Go if it’s time. Just go knowing you were loved, that I will never forget you, that you will live in everything Connor and I do. Go knowing I love you purely, Harry, that you were an amazing father. Go knowing I told you all my secrets. Because you were my best friend.”
The bi rep:
”It really makes you think, doesn’t it? That people were so eager to believe we were swapping spouses but would have been scandalized to know we were monogamous and queer?”
And now we finally come to one of the most important subjects of this book: The bi rep! And let me tell you, it was spot-on! Evelyn is a bi icon and for the rest of my life I’ll never get tired of emphasizing how important this kind of representation is! Throughout the entire book Evelyn is confronted with bi-phobia but she always took it in stride! She accepted herself the way she was and she did an amazing job at trying to explain her sexuality. I know some of you might say that it shouldn’t even be necessary to explain your sexuality to others and I’m inclined to agree, but the bitter truth is that we have to explain it no matter if we want to or not. I can only speak from personal experience here but usually straight people have a hard time understanding how you can love both sexes equally and make no difference, while lesbian or gay people might just try to label you as one of their own. What Celia did?! It happens! It happens way too often and even though her actions and behaviour left a bitter taste in my mouth it still represented one of the many facets of reality. I loved the way Taylor Jenkins Reid gave Evelyn a voice though. Evelyn Hugo didn’t accept those prejudices, nope, she gave us her honest opinion, her point of view and made the other characters acknowledge her for who she was! And this was wholesome and healthy and might help a lot of people to accept themselves! So thank you Taylor Jenkins Reid! Thank you very much! <333
”Being bisexual didn’t make me disloyal,” Evelyn says. “One has nothing to do with the other. Nor did it mean that Celia could only fulfil half my needs.”
”I hated being called a lesbian. Not because I thought there was anything wrong with loving a woman, mind you. No, I’d come to terms with that a long time ago. But Celia only saw things in black and white. She liked women and only women. And I liked her. And so she often denied the rest of me.”
”Wow,” he said. “Incredible. I married a dyke.”
“Stop saying that,” I said.
“Evelyn, if you have sex with women, you are a lesbian. Don’t be a self-hating lesbian. That’s not… that’s not becoming.”
The more I think about this book, the more I love it! This is such an important read! I know Reid tackled a lot of problematic topics in this book, but she did it in such a positive and sensible way that I’m convinced everyone who reads “The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo” will learn something good from it! I’m usually not the kind of person who throws a book at you and says you should read it but in all seriousness: Read this one! Live and suffer with Evelyn, enjoy her good moments and cry with her when the world throws her for a loop! Hate her, love her, accept her the way she is. And most importantly, learn from her mistakes and don’t hesitate to show the world your true self. ;-)
I know this review has been already way too long but I still want to thank the ever charming Ashley for this wonderful buddy read! We both didn’t have it easy while reading this book together, but we always managed to find a compromise and were able to continue once our lives started to become a little less hectic. *lol* I’m glad we could read this together and I hope sooner or later we’ll find another book to buddy read again! =) ...more
Notes are private!
Mar 08, 2019
Apr 11, 2019
Mar 08, 2019
Jun 20, 1890
Feb 24, 1994
it was amazing
”He grew more and more enamoured of his own beauty, more and more interested in the corruption of his own soul.”
I think I must have been about fifteen ”He grew more and more enamoured of his own beauty, more and more interested in the corruption of his own soul.”
I think I must have been about fifteen when I read “The Picture of Dorian Gray” for the very first time and I was totally blown away by it. There was this book, written in such a beautiful way, using such colourful and flowery language and there were those three amazing characters that made me feel and wonder and question their lives and decisions!
You might say that up until I picked up “The Picture of Dorian Gray” I was as innocent as Dorian himself. I didn’t know that there were books like that out there, that there actually existed morally grey characters, corrupted characters, book characters that felt like real people and could make you question their behaviour. It was an entirely new world for me and I was totally fascinated by it.
So I read this book and I savoured every sentence, I devoured its wisdom and got lost in its pages! Looking at it in retrospective I think that Oscar Wilde actually was the first writer who didn’t only make me love classics but also the first author that ignited my undying love for villains and complex characters. And for that I’ll always be grateful!
I don’t know how often I read this book by now (goodreads your count doesn’t even get close to the actual number *lol*), but no matter how often I already read it, I’m still captivated by it. My fifteen year old me loved it as much as my 31 year old me does and if you ask me that’s exactly what makes a good classic. ;-) I’m sure I’ll never get tired of reading this book and I’ll always discover new things about it. And I genuinely hope that many other people will read it as well. It’s definitely worth it! ;-)
Warning: You are now entering the gallery of “Spoilery Spoilers” and since this is one of my all-time faves I’ll probably end up writing an entire essay about it. If you prefer to stay innocent you better leave before my spoilers get to you and corrupt your soul! ;-P
”It held the secret of his life, and told his story. It had taught him to love his own beauty. Would it teach him to loathe his own soul?”
Dorian Gray! I don’t even know where to start! I love his character to bits and pieces and he’s definitely one of the most intriguing book characters I ever had the pleasure to read about. At the beginning of the book he’s so innocent and naïve and I totally agree with Lord Henry when he says that this is charming. Dorian definitely is a charming character! He’s beautiful and pure and whenever I read the beginning of the book I get a sudden urge to protect him against everything that’s going to happen over the course of those 256 pages! He’s like a child that gets corrupted by the bad influence of others and when I write this I really mean it! Even at his worst he still seems to retain that innocent outlook at things. I mean he was corrupted and tainted by Lord Henry, and he ends up corrupting and tainting his friends but despite all of this he still wonders why they have become like that. He’s completely oblivious to his own role in their downfall and when Basil confronts him with it, he doesn’t believe him. He is convinced that his friends could have done the right thing and that his influence on them isn’t as strong as Basil claims it to be. What is even more intriguing is that Dorian actually wants to be good! There’s a part of him that’s still innocent and hopes that he can be redeemed, but there’s also that other side of him that whispers that he’s entitled to do whatever he wishes to do. It’s obvious that he’s fighting an inner struggle and that he seems to have lost his way. It’s the century old question every person has to ask her/himself. Do I want to be good? And even more important: Can I resist being bad? It’s so easy to do the wrong thing and it’s so tough to do what’s right. I mean that’s the main reason why actors and role-players love to be the baddies! Being bad is fun, it gives you a lot of freedom and if you’re good at it the consequences never catch up to you. ;-P So Dorian constantly finds himself at a crossroads. Will he do the right thing or is he going to give into his bad side? Is his bad side truly that bad? Is having a little fun with his friends and to indulge in pleasure wrong or is it just a part of being human? The fate of Dorian Gray makes you think and it involuntarily causes you to face your own demons and weaknesses. It ultimately causes you to acknowledge your own vices and fears. In short: It makes you pause and forces you to ponder your own life-choices! And this is nothing but awesome! XD
”I want to be good. I can’t bear the idea of my soul being hideous.”
”He felt that the time had really come for making his choice. Or had his choice already been made? Yes, life had decided that for him – life, and his own infinite curiosity about life. Eternal youth, infinite passion, pleasures subtle and secret, wild joys and wilder sins – he was to have all these things. The portrait was to bear the burden of his shame: that was all.”
”I don’t want to be at the mercy of my emotions. I want to use them, to enjoy them and to dominate them.”
”He was prisoned in thought. Memory, like a horrible malady, was eating his soul away.”
”You seem to forget that I am married, and the one charm of marriage is that it makes a life of deception absolutely necessary for both parties. I never know where my wife is, and my wife never knows what I am doing.”
Ahh Lord Henry! How much I love that bastard! *lol* He’s quite literally the devil in this book. He’s the person that stirrs Dorian’s soul! He’s the man who leads him down that dark road and just like Dorian he is completely oblivious to the magnitude of his influence! Yes, he knows that he’s corrupting Dorian, he even finds pleasure and joy in it, but throughout the entire book he never truly realizes how much his words actually changed him! How much damage they did to his soul! Lord Henry is the kind of character you just got to love. Arrogant, intelligent, wise, self-confident, brutally honest and completely unapologetic about his inappropriate behaviour. It’s no wonder Dorian is so fascinated by him and isn’t only willing but also eager to spend his time in his company. Lord Henry is basically the embodiment of temptation and young and innocent Dorian wants to be seduced! And honestly, who wouldn’t be drawn towards a character like Lord Henry? I swear he says the wisest things and vocalizes the most accurate statements regarding society! He’s exactly the kind of devil you’d love to have on your shoulder! Plus there’s so much truth in his words that it hurts! XD
”I make a great difference between people. I choose my friends for their good looks, my acquaintances for their good characters, and my enemies for their good intellects. A man cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies.”
”I like persons better than principles, and I like persons with no principles better than anything else in the world.”
”We are punished for our refusals. Every impulse that we strive to strangle broods in the mind, and poisons us. The body sins once, and has done with its sin, for action is a mode of purification. Nothing remains then but the recollection of a pleasure, or the luxury of a regret. The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it.”
”When I like people immensely I never tell their names to anyone. It is like surrendering a part of them. I have grown to love secrecy.”
If Lord Henry is the devil on Dorian’s shoulder then Basil certainly is the angel that sits on his other side. The painter functions as Dorian’s consciousness and as long as they know each other he always appeals to his good side and tries his best to sway him on a righteous path. He’s clearly the counterweight to Lord Henry’s corruption, but unfortunately he doesn’t have a lot of leverage. Well, at least not as much as Harry does! I mean the saying: “Come to the dark side, we got cookies” exists for a reason, right? ;-P In the end Dorian can’t stand his bad conscience any longer and does the only thing that’s seemingly able to liberate him. He kills Basil in order to silence his remorse and regrets, but what he didn’t expect is that this dark deed makes him feel even more tainted and guilty. So in the end Basil’s death only increased his sense of guilt and caused him to feel even more haunted. In my opinion the murder of Basil is the final nail in Dorian’s coffin and from that moment on he couldn’t be saved anymore.
”You were the most unspoiled creature in the whole world. Now, I don’t know what has come over you. You talk as if you had no heart, no pity in you.”
Dorian Gray & Basil Hallward:
”He won’t like you the better for keeping your promises. He always breaks his own. I beg you not to go.” Dorian Gray laughed and shook his head.
“I entreat you.”
The lad hesitated, and looked over at Lord Henry, who was watching them from the tea-table with an amused smile.
“I must go, Basil,” he answered.
And this is the key moment! The very first time Dorian Gray finds himself at a crossroads and choses the wrong path. You gotta love Oscar Wilde for the subtle intensity of this scene! There’s nothing extraordinary or special about it, yet it’s still the first choice that leads Dorian down his dark descent. It’s unagitated, ordinary and so very powerful! It’s obvious Basil loved Dorian and when I talk about love here, I’m talking about true love and not just friendship. He’s infatuated with him and basically worships the young and innocent Dorian. After he realises what Dorian has become, it’s already too late for him though. Poor Basil, if he would have known what his picture would make of Dorian, if he would have known how much Lord Henry’s negative influence would change his innocent and pure friend….
”One has a right to judge of a man by the effect he has over his friends. Yours seem to lose all sense of honour, of goodness, of purity. You have filled them with a madness for pleasure. They have gone down into the depths. You led them there.”
”There was nothing evil in it, nothing shameful. You were to me such an ideal as I shall never meet again. This is the face of a satyr.”
“It is the face of my soul.”
“Christ! what a thing I must have worshipped! It has the eyes of a devil.”
“Each of us has Heaven and Hell in him, Basil,” cried Dorian, with a wild gesture of despair.
Dorian Gray & Lord Henry:
”Words! Mere words! How terrible they were! How clear, and vivid and cruel! One could not escape from them. And yet what a subtle magic there was in them!”
Okay, and here comes the moment when I say that Lord Henry and Dorian Gray are in love with each other. *lol* It’s so freaking obvious!! They are fascinated by each other, they are besotted with each other and they want to spend every free moment in each other’s company! So yeah, there’s that! I think their dynamic and their interactions are very interesting and to me it seems like Lord Henry is some sort of catalyst. He’s the impulse that changes Dorian’s soul, he’s the first person who opens Dorian’s eyes and tells him that he’s beautiful. Oscar Wilde uses him as his tool to initiate Dorian’s monumental change. Which is kind of interesting, if you consider that Oscar Wilde was gay. It feels like Dorian’s and Henry’s relationship is wrong and I’m not even sure if Wilde was aware of that? I mean yes, their friendship led Dorian into the abyss of his soul, which is pretty obvious if you ask me, but there’s some subtle note about their “relationship”. It’s like deep down Oscar Wilde thought that it was wrong to have intense feelings for another man. And if you consider the time in which this was written it’s not surprising that he might have felt that way. Lord Henry represents Oscar’s sins and vices and it becomes quite apparent that some small part of him might have bemoaned his sexual orientation. In contrast to Wilde no one holds Dorian Gray to account though. He gets away with all of his sins and in the end this eventually causes him to destroys himself! What a moral punchline! XD
”Talking to him was like playing upon an exquisite violin. He answered to every touch and thrill of the bow…”
”Yes,” continued Lord Henry, “that is one of the great secrets of life – to cure the soul by means of the senses, and the senses by means of the soul. You are a wonderful creation. You know more than you think you know, just as you know less than you want to know.”
”The moment I met you I saw that you were quite unconscious of what you really are, of what you really might be. There was so much in you that charmed me that I felt I must tell you something about yourself. I thought how tragic it would be if you were wasted.
"You know how a voice can stir one. Your voice and the voice of Sibyl Vane are two things that I shall never forget. When I close my eyes, I hear them, and each of them says something different. I don't know which to follow."
”The soul is a terrible reality. It can be bought, and sold, and bartered away. It can be poisoned, or made perfect. There is a soul in each one of us. I know it.”
This book is a gem! It’s perfection and so quotable that I could probably highlight each and every single passage! No matter how often I read it, there is always something new I didn’t notice before! I still wonder and guess about certain characters and “The Picture of Dorian Gray” still causes me to think. The writing style is so beautiful I can’t help but fall in love with it. I fall in love with this book over and over again. Every time I read it I love it even more and I’m sure that I will adore this masterpiece until I’m wrinkled and old.
Oscar Wilde drags us into the dark depths of the human soul, and once you get there you don’t want to return to the surface anymore.
That’s what this book is. <333 ...more
Notes are private!
Feb 19, 2019
May 11, 2019
Feb 19, 2019
May 14, 2019
May 14, 2019
it was amazing
”He wants to set himself on fire, but he can’t afford for anyone to see him burn.”
First of all: If you want to read my full and uncensored review with ”He wants to set himself on fire, but he can’t afford for anyone to see him burn.”
First of all: If you want to read my full and uncensored review with all the quotes and my personal trademark rambling you can do it here! And now to the considerably shortened goodreads review! (word limits *shakes head*)
This sentence, this book, the topics that are tackled, the honest and blunt way they are dealt with and approached?! This was everything!!! I love this book so much, I can’t even put it into words. <333 Well, I loved it and some little, tiny, infinitesimal part of me might haven even hated it for being so perfect! Because the way subjects are approached in here? Gods, I wish everyone would be as open minded as the characters in this book.
That sentence at the beginning of my review? It hit close to home, it pains me to read it, yet I still love the fact that Casey McQuiston wrote it down on paper! That she had the guts to give this particular kind of feeling her own voice and words. How many people who are forced to be in the closet have felt like that? How many children were afraid to come out to their parents? How many still didn’t do it and never will, because they know exactly what their parents might say? How they will react… How many of us have felt alone and were weighted down by the truth?
This book, this supposedly romantic comedy, it touched me in a way books rarely do. It ripped out my heart, it made me laugh, it stomped all over my feelings, it smacked me across the face, it forced me to confront me with myself and it gave me something I didn’t even know I was missing: It gave me hope.
Hope that there is a better world out there.
Hope that one day people will accept others the way they are.
Hope that people can change.
Hope that we’re all equal and that our actions count more than our outward appearance.
Hope that our future in this world is worth fighting for.
So if you decide to read this book, enjoy it! Laugh and cry, appreciate the politics and scheming, adore Henry and Alex for being the way they are, fall in love, enjoy their freedom and youth, but most of all find yourself in those pages and try to keep this feeling even after you closed the book. ;-)
Do I even have to mention that you’ll be spoiled into oblivion if you dare to cross this line?! *lol* This is my characters section and I wouldn’t be me if I wouldn’t gush like a crazy little teen! XD So you’ve been warned! Dare to move on or leave it at that. Your decision, your choice. ;-P
”Alex’s image is all charisma and genius and smirking wit, thoughtful interviews and the cover of GQ at eighteen; Henry’s is placid smiles and gentle chivalry and generic charity appearances, a perfectly blank Prince Charming canvas. Henry’s role, Alex thinks, is much easier to play.”
I didn’t like Alex at the beginning of the book! I know this might come as a shock but I really felt like he was sitting on his high horse and didn’t even bother to think about how other people felt. Or in this particular case how Henry felt. In his mind he gave him a role and never even looked beyond the horizon. But then the accident with the cake happened and Alex was forced to spend some time with Henry and he finally realized what a dumbass he actually was. I loved how Alex realized that he likes him and I adored him for being so unapologetic about his bisexuality. He just accepted it as a part of himself, he wondered about it, he explored it but he never felt bad about being who he truly was! And this was amazing! I wish there would be more bi representations like that; I wish that everyone would be as cool about being bi as Alex was. As his friends and family were! It was a huge part of him but it didn’t define him or is actions. This was so wholesome and such a nice way to deal with your own sexuality. Then again Alex is a very confident and brazen character so to deal with it like that fit him perfectly. XD
”It’s unpredictable and it’s intoxicating and it’s fun, because Alex has never met a challenge he didn’t love, and he – well, Henry is a challenge, head to toe, beginning to end.”
”He shouldn’t feel wronged deep in his gut. But that everyone seems enamored, when the only difference between the lie and the truth that would burn up Fox News is the gender involved … well, it fucking stings.”
”Sería una mentira, porque no sería él.” It would be a lie, because it wouldn’t be him.
”Hmm,” Henry says, making a show of thinking hard. “I always liked Luke. He’s brave and good, and he’s the strongest Jedi of them all. I think Luke is proof that it doesn’t matter where you come from or who your family is – you can always be great if you’re true to yourself.”
I FREAKING LOVED, LOVED, LOVED and LOVED, Henry! *lol* This boy is adorable and kind and sweet and gentle and everything anyone will ever need! <333 I mean he’s a Warsie and Potterhead!!! He ships Lupin with Sirius and he loves to watch Bake Off because it’s so soothing??!! Where the freaking hell is my Prince Henry!!??? *lol* I definitely need this fluffy biscuit Prince in my life! Like yesterday! XD But there’s also a wild side to Henry, a defiant one and boy did I ever live for those little snippets of his personality! I adored his character arc so much! I mean at the beginning of the book he was the shy and reserved prince and by the end of it he eventually found his own voice and shouted his innermost thoughts into the world. Still, it was so sad that his father died when he was so young and I felt Henry’s grief like it was my own. T_T I could understand why his mother decided to withdraw from the world, but I was really glad that she accepted her son the way he was and fought for him in the end. =)
”A curious thing about grief is the way it takes your entire life, all those foundational years that made you who you are, and makes them so painful to look back upon because of the absence there, that suddenly they’re inaccessible. You must invent an entirely new system.”
”What are we even defending here, Philip? What kind of legacy? What kind of family, that says, we’ll take the murder, we’ll take the raping and pillaging and the colonizing, we’ll scrub it up nice and neat in a museum, but oh no, you’re a bloody poof? That’s beyond our sense of decorum! I’ve bloody well had it. I’ve sat about long enough letting you and Gran and the weight of the damned world keep me pinned, and I’m finished. I don’t care. You can take your legacy and your decorum and you can shove it up your fucking arse, Philip. I’m done.”
”I’ve been gay as a maypole since the day I came out of Mum, Philip.”
”Numbers on me being into dudes?”
That pulls Nora up short, before she cocks her head to the side and says. “Seventy-eight percent probability of latent bisexual tendencies. One hundred percent probability this is not a hypothetical question.”
I loved Nora’s analytical mind and her conversations with Alex. It was obvious they were great friends and knew each other better than anyone else. XD And don’t kill me for this but: WHAT EXACTLY WAS GOING ON WITH NORA AND JUNE???!!! There was something there, right? I didn’t imagine this unresolved sexual tension, did I? *lol* Want to hear my thoughts on it? I think there was some sort of threesome going on the night they celebrated at the karaoke bar. Pez, Nora AND June! All three of them, feel me? *wriggles eyebrows* Unfortunately this is a mystery that was neither tackled nor resolved so my imagination will have to continue to run wild and I’ll blame it all on Casey McQuiston! *lol* ;-P
”How many times do I have to tell y’all not to discuss your murder plots in front of a sitting president?” their mother interrupts. “Plausible deniability. Come on.”
Haha! This sentence instantly made me love the President! XD She was such a cool woman and Alex was so lucky to have her as his mum! It was amazing how she could be all business but at the same time always watched out for her kids. They were her first priority no matter how important her job was and she would have done anything to make them happy. Yes, she had a lot of responsibility and tried to perform damage control, but that was mostly due to her feelings for her son. She didn’t want Alex to get hurt and she wanted to protect him. I mean she was a public figure and we all know how those games are played. Well and as it turned out, Richards played very dirty indeed. >_< Also can we appreciate how Alex’s dad reacted to him being bi and loving Henry? I wish more parents would say words like that to their queer kids! Because it’s true, it’s not different when it’s your own kid, you still love your child and want the best for it. (At least it should be that way!!!) You want it to be happy, right? See, that’s exactly what I meant when I said this book gave me hope. =)
His dad slaps him on the bicep with the spoon, leaving a splatter of crema and cheese behind. “Have a little more faith in your old man than that, eh? A little appreciation for the patron saint of gender-neutral bathrooms in California? Little shit.”
“Okay, okay, sorry!” Alex says, laughing. “I just know it’s different when it’s your own kid.”
His dad laughs too, rubbing a hand over his goatee. “It’s really not. Not to me, anyway. I see you.”
”Diaz, you insane, hopeless romantic little shit,” says the voice of the President of the United States, muffled in the bed. “It had better be forever. Be safe.”
”I am your mother. I was your mother before I was ever the president, and I’ll be your mother long after, to the day they put me in the ground and beyond this earth. You are my child. So, if you’re serious about this, I’ll back your play.”
The relationships & ships:
Henry & Alex:
”Let’s get it over with.”
“I’d rather be waterboarded,” Henry says, smiling back. The camera snaps nearby. His eyes are big and soft and blue, and he desperately needs to be punched in one of them. “Your country could probably arrange that.”
Alex throws his head back and laughs handsomely, loud and false. “Go fuck yourself.”
“Hardly enough time,” Henry says.”
I could have quoted the entire book, I swear!!! There were so many amazing quotes, countless sweet and tender moments, about a thousand ways they told each other that they are in love. <3 Easy banter, sassy retorts, just everything you could possibly wish for. One of my personal highlights was the Turkey Gate though. *lol* And their e-mails, hell, their e-mails killed me! T_T I loved how they swore so much in their normal conversations but wrote so beautiful messages to each other. And considering that to write a message takes time and that you think long and hard what to write this was very realistic too. They were utterly, truly and madly in love and you could read it in every line! I felt so sorry for them though. It must have been so tough to be exposed like that and to deal with the press and consequences. Alone the fact that Richards leaked their relationship and didn’t even give a damn about their feelings. They were outed by others and it was NOT their own decision! And this is wrong!!! If you decide to out yourself it’s a personal thing, it’s something you decide, something that should be in your hands! You should be able to decide when you come out to your family, your friends or the world. If you never want to come out that’s okay too, but it is YOUR DECISION to make and no one should take this away from you! GRRR!! *grizzly bear mode* I guess you can already tell that this is a very important and touchy subject for me. XD But I feel about this strongly, because not everyone is ready to come out and for many people to take this step means to give up the life they are used to. Not everyone is as understanding as Alex’s family and not everyone accepts a person the way it is… Anyway, those two are sharing the first place with Baz and Simon now. *LOL* Because I love both of those m/m couples so much and can’t decide which one is the better OTP! XD Their level of cuteness is just off the charts!! <333
Henry’s whole face grimaces in frustration, his eyes casting skyward like they’re searching for help from an uncaring universe. “Christ, you are as thick as it gets,” he says, and he grabs Alex’s face in both hands and kisses him.
”Should I tell you that when we’re apart, your body comes back to me in dreams? That when I sleep, I see you, the dip of your waist, the freckle above your hip, and when I wake up in the morning, it feels like I’ve just been with you, the phantom touch of your hand on the back of my neck flesh and not imagined? That I can feel your skin against mine, and it makes every bone in my body ache? That, for a few moments, I can hold my breath and be back there with you, in a dream, in a thousand rooms, nowhere at all?”
”but I’ve kissed your mouth, that corner, that place it goes, so many times now. i’ve memorized it. Topography on the map of you, a world i’m still charting. i know it. i added it to the key. here: inches to miles. i can multiply it out, read your latitude and longitude. recite your coordinates like la rosaria.”
“Red, White & Royal Blue” was one of my most anticipated reads this year and I wasn’t disappointed! This book was everything I wanted it to be and it made me so, so happy! McQuiston tackled a lot of serious topics and they varied from loss and depression up to homophobia and political schemes. This book was an amazing composition about love, hate, ignorance and prejudices. Some might say it’s a modern fairy tale and I’m inclined to agree. What made this book truly outstanding is its final message though: You are perfect just the way you are! You are beautiful and you are allowed to love yourself! Or to say it with Alex’s words:
”Take everything you want and know you deserve to have it.”
Four damn good reasons to read this book:
1.) It’s still pride month and it’s about time I finally read a LGBTQ+ book!
2.) I’ve been dying to read this for months!
3.) After all those dystopian science fiction books I really need a fluffy break! >_<
4.) I just can’t seem to be able to say no to this girl! XD I'm sure she's very happy now. *lol* ...more
Notes are private!
Jun 23, 2019
Aug 16, 2019
Jan 13, 2019
Sep 18, 2011
Oct 22, 2011
it was amazing
”Somewhere close by, a man is moaning; he’s been trampled or thrown or bitten. He sounds resentful or surprised. Did no one tell him that pain lives i ”Somewhere close by, a man is moaning; he’s been trampled or thrown or bitten. He sounds resentful or surprised. Did no one tell him that pain lives in this sand, dug in and watered with our blood?”
I really don’t know where I should start with this review because just like any of Maggie’s other books this one wasn’t only magical but also so damn atmospheric that it’s more than just hard to put my feelings into proper words. There is something in the way she writes that always captures the emotions and the essence of a certain season or time. In “Shiver” it was winter, in TRC it’s that foggy, otherworldly atmosphere of Cabeswater and in “The Scorpio Races” it was autumn and the daily life on an island.
I swear I could feel the cold autumn wind on my skin and I could smell the leaves and the sea with my nose while I read this book. It was done so perfectly that I immerged into a totally different world and just like Puck and Sean (and Craig ;-P) I couldn’t help but fall in love with the capaill uisce. Those water horses were so awesome, I can’t even! <333
”The capaill uisce plunged down the sand, skirmishing and bucking, shaking the sea foam out of their manes and the Atlantic from their hooves. They screamed back to the others still in the water, high wails that raised the hair on my arms. They were swift and deadly, savage and beautiful. The horses were giants, at once the ocean and the island, and that was when I loved them.”
I love how Maggie described them and I also love that she researched the myths and folklore of water horses. They are indeed very fascinating and if you want to delve a little deeper you just have to look them up under “cabyll-ushtey”. Anyway, back to the actual water horses of this book! They were amazing and I loved their beautiful, violent and graceful nature! It’s kind of obvious Maggie has some experience with horses because I think otherwise she would have never been able to write about them so convincingly. There’s a deep respect in her words and you can feel it whenever you read Sean’s or Pucks POV! And tell you what? I loved that aspect of the book! It made it so good and realistic that I was almost convinced those horses actually exist. *lol*
And this ultimately brings me right to the two main characters of “The Scorpio Races”. Puck Connolly and Sean Kendrick! <333
”And then I see him. A dark-haired boy who is made of all corners. He is standing next in line by the counter, silent and still in his blue-black jacket, his arms folded across his chest. He looks out of place and wild in here: expression sharp, collar turned up against the back of his neck, hair still windblown from the beach.”
”My mother always said that I was born out of a bottle of vinegar instead of born from a womb and that she and my father bathed me in sugar for three days to wash it off. I try to behave, but I always go back to the vinegar.”
I adored them both! XD Sean Kendrick was a mystery to everyone but himself and Puck Connolly was an open book that had its own secrets. They were two really intriguing characters and before I even knew it, I was already pulling for them. *lol* Even though they both had a rather rough life they still decided to fight for their dreams and they truly did everything possible in order to achieve their goals. They really dealt with every blow that came their way and they did it with fierce determination! <3
”The truth is this: for eleven months of the year I make myself valuable to Malvern, and then for one month, I make myself invaluable. Would he be willing to give up that one month to keep the other eleven? Am I willing to risk it?”
”Why is it that going away is the standard? Does anyone ask you why you stay, Sean Kendrick?”
“And why do you?”
“The sky and the sand and the sea and Corr.”
This is such a perfect quote because Sean and Puck ARE the embodiment of the island. They are deeply rooted in its sand and unlike so many of the islands other inhabitants they can’t even imagine to leave it one day. It’s their heart, their home and the place they belong to and I think Maggie conveyed that feeling more than just well. =) Still, the island is its own entity and there are people that make it hard to enjoy the wilderness of this land. First and foremost Benjamin Malvern and his demon of a son called Mutt.
”And I told you before, I’ll sell you any of the thoroughbreds.”
“I didn’t make any of those thoroughbreds. I didn’t make them what they are.”
Malvern says, “You made all of them what they are.”
I don’t look at him. “None of them made me who I am.”
”Mr Kendrick was born on a horse and he’ll die on one, and maybe that’s not something you can breed for. He’s one of those rare men who can make a horse work for him but never asks for more than they have.”
It was so obvious that Benjamin Malvern had a deep respect for Sean, yet at the same time he refused to let him go. Ever the business man he tied him to his stable making him just another one of his precious horses. I hated Benjamin Malvern so much for that and I despised him even more for being aware of Sean’s talent and keeping him under his thumb. And I don’t even want to speak about Mutt Malvern that – excuse my crude language – sadistic douche bag! Gosh, there were moments I wanted to slap some sense into him and I am a pacifist and actually never slapped anyone. (My only weapons are words! *lol*) ARGH! Just to think about Mutt makes my blood boil, such a despicable a******!!! >_<
”At the sound of them, the red stallion flinches, as if the bells are physically painful, and I find myself unexpectedly blinking away tears.
Sean Kendrick turns his face away.
There’s something so wretched in that that I can’t just leave him there by himself.”
I swear Sean and Puck had to put up with so many things before the races and I loved them so much for never giving up! Plus I also liked that Puck was the first woman to ever take part in the races! Thank you Maggie for inventing a strong female character people are able to look up to! We still need more of those! <3 And last but not least another thing I’m very thankful for: A slow, realistic burn and a relationship that was built on mutual respect and the love for their horses and home!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THAT!!! <333
I say, “I will not be your weakness, Sean Kendrick.”
Now he looks at me. He says, very softly, “It’s late for that, Puck.”
All told I really loved this book! “The Scorpio Races” was an awesome “ride” and the ending was as bittersweet as dark chocolate with a pinch of salt in it. T_T
Highly recommended and definitely once again an amazing Maggie Stiefvater book! ;-)
Since this was another buddy read with my amazing Sugar Bun I want to use the chance to thank him for this cool and funny BR! I think our next one is already pending. Do you still have a copy of “Linger”? *lol* I have the feeling that you’ll need a yucky romance soon. Haha! ;-P ...more
Notes are private!
Oct 13, 2018
Oct 01, 2018
Sep 01, 2015
Sep 01, 2015
it was amazing
”When you shatter the chains of this world and forge the next, remember that art is as vital as food to a kingdom. Without it, a kingdom is nothing, a ”When you shatter the chains of this world and forge the next, remember that art is as vital as food to a kingdom. Without it, a kingdom is nothing, and will be forgotten by time.”
If you read any of my updates I’m sure you’ll already know how I feel about this book. To say it was better than its predecessors would probably be the understatement of the century so all I’ll say is that Sarah once again surpassed herself. <3
There were so many new characters that got introduced during the book and I’m not lying when I say that I loved them all. XD I think one of the most amazing things about Sarah’s books is that she has so many awesome and strong heroines! They do what they want to do, they are brave, they dare to dream, they dare to hope and they always make their way! It’s just so amazing to read! =)))
Of course not everything in “Queen of Shadows” is sunshine though and boy did it hit me with the feels sometimes! There were actually moments I was so frustrated that I felt like tearing the book apart (Don’t worry I did no such thing, I love my books too much to harm them. *lol*) and there were some chapters that killed me over and over again. I guess by now you all know which chapters I’m talking about. ;-)
Well anyway, let’s not talk about the epic fights or the hopeful ending. WHAT a hopeful ending? YES!!! Jeez, I think this must be the first time I’m not destroyed after one of Sarah’s books. I’m actually h- … hopeful! I’m not licking my wounds or trying to deal with my emotions so knowing Sarah I have absolutely no doubt that she’s going to destroy me with “Empire of Storms”.
Ladies and Gentleman, this is the quiet before the storm and I’m so not ready for it! XD Which is probably the main reason I’m writing this review. I’m trying to stall for time. *lol* #SorryNotSorry
Spoiler warning! My character section is so full of spoilers you won’t even have to read the book anymore. ;-P So if you still want to read this series and want to experience it all by yourself you better stop reading now! Don’t say I didn’t warn you! XD
”How can I take away somebody who means the world to someone else? Even if she’s my enemy.”
Boy, did I have mixed feelings about Aelin in this book! On the one hand I really loved her and could understand her decisions, but on the other hand all I wanted to do was to yell at her! *lol* I mean she sometimes really didn’t make it easy to like her in this book, knowing about her past and everything she’s been through I could see through her façade though. I mean it’s obvious she struggled with her new role as Queen and because of her insecurities and fears she sometimes made mistakes that got her into trouble. A crown is a heavy weight; I don’t blame her for not being perfect. Hell, I’m pretty sure I would have made plenty of mistakes as well. XD
”But now that she was here … everything was an effort not to say she was sorry. Sorry not for what she’d done to his face, but for the fact that her heart was healed – still fractured in spots, but healed – and he … he was not in it. Not as he’d once been.”
”Magic has saved your life a few times now, if I recall correctly.”
“Yes,” he breathed, “you and Dorian both – and I’m grateful, I am. But where are the checks against your kind? Iron? Not much of a deterrent, is it? Once magic is free, who is to stop the monsters from coming out again? Who is to stop you?”
And here is my second problem child! Chaol! Jeez, he said quite some nasty stuff! I mean I know where he’s coming from and I understand that he worries for his people and kingdom; I’m not okay with what he said about magic though. Before you go all like: “Oh don’t you dare to say anything against my baby!” now *raises eyebrow and looks at Gem and J.* I’ll tell you that despite all this I actually still love him. *lol* He did the best he could do and he’s just human. Of course he is afraid of magic and what it might do to his kingdom. I mean in spite of being the former captain of the king’s guard he’s still young. I’m sure he can’t even remember the world with magic and it’s no surprise he’s afraid of it. If he proved anything over those last 4 books then it is that he’s able to learn and to change though. So yes, I have faith in him and I’m sure as long as he follows his heart, he’ll always do the right thing. Plus: WHY DID YOU HAVE TO HURT HIM LIKE THAT, SARAH?! I think Chaol suffered enough over those last few books and now this too?! Not fair. T_T
”He deserved this darkness, and once the invisible boundary shattered and the waiting thing pounced, infiltrating and filling him … he’d have earned it.”
MY PRECIOUS CINNAMON ROLL!!! *sobs* Gosh, how much did I suffer with him, how much did I weep for his shattered and broken soul. The pain he went through, the torture he had to endure. T_T Every chapter was another stab into my heart and by the end of the book I almost lost hope that he’d be free again. I thought he was going to die, that nothing would be left of him, but then, then he broke his chains and OMG did I cry when he finally escaped!!! Still, he’s so broken and lonely and I’m not sure how he’s going to deal with everything that happened to him. I’m so worried about Dorian and I really hope he’ll be able to find happiness! #TeamDorian forever and for always!!! <333
”There were tears running down Aelin’s face as Dorian gripped the black stone encircling his throat. And bellowing his grief, his rage, his pain, he snapped the collar from his neck.”
”The sun would still rise and fall, the seasons would still change, heedless of whether he was free or enslaved, prince or king, heedless of who was alive and who was gone. The world would keep moving on. It didn’t seem right, somehow.”
”I’m not in the habit of forcing my servants.”
“Only slaughtering men like pigs, correct?”
“Their deaths equate to their behavior in life,” Manon replied with a kind of calm that made Elide wonder whether she should start running.
Ahh Manon! My sexy relentless, fierce and ruthless witch! I love her! She’s one of those characters I can’t help but adore! I know she isn’t really a heroine, but she certainly is no villain either. In fact she’s such a complex character that I just can’t get enough of her! I FREAKIN LOVE THIS WITCH! And I’m so damn glad she finally decided to do what SHE thinks is right! YESH!!! Screw that old hag of a matron and do your thing Manon! Because you’re amazing and you could be so much more than just the monster others see in you! It’s time to disobey orders and to kick asses! Show them your iron fangs, baby! XD #GuessImTeamManonNowToo
Asterin let out another joyless laugh. “You would not have disobeyed even if it had been Blackbeaks down there, would you? Loyalty, obedience, brutality – that is what you are.”
”Do you believe monsters are born, or made?”
”You will make mistakes. You will make decisions, and sometimes you will regret those choices. Sometimes there won’t be a right choice, just the best of several bad options. I don’t need to tell you that you can do this – you know you can. I wouldn’t have sworn the oath to you if I didn’t think you could.”
I like Rowan but despite him becoming the main love interest for Aelin I still don’t love him as much as I love Dorian or Aedion. Hmm.. I dunno what it is but I think I’m kind of unhappy with his development. I mean in “Heir of Fire” he was this kickass, broody and fierce warrior that took no shit and now he’s almost become a purring kitty in Aelin’s arms. I mean I do get that he loves Aelin and would do everything for her, but I think his love for her made him less interesting somehow? Idk. It’s like he lost some part of himself now that he fell in love with his Queen and I really hope we’ll see the fierce warrior in “Empire of Storms” again. Please?
”Whatever you had to do to survive, whatever you did from spite or rage or selfishness … I don’t give a damn. You’re here – and you’re perfect. You always were, and you always will be.”
AEDION IS MY CUPCAKE! Seriously I think he’s one of the cutest guys ever and he definitely deserves the world! I love how fiercely loyal he is and that he always tries to see the good in people. He never wavered and he always did the right thing, even if it hurt him and was at his own expense. Like for instance accepting that Aelin let Rowan take the oath and didn’t even mention it! Gosh darn it! Aedion deserved better than that! I’ll personally pull Aelin’s long fae ears if she ever hurts him like that again!! Also is Aedion bi? I mean he commented on Rowan being handsome so I think that actually might be a possibility! Just one more reason to love him! <333
“No. And what kills me is that I can’t remember what my real face was. That was the danger of shifting – that you would forget your real form, because it’s the memory of it that guides the shifting. I remember being plain as a dormouse, but … I don’t remember if my eyes were blue or gray or green; I can’t remember the shape of my nose or my chin. And it was a child’s body, too. I don’t know what I would look like now, as a woman.”
I’m in love with Lysandra too! *lol* Yes, I can’t help it! She’s such an awesome woman as well and she’s a hell of a fighter! Gosh did I love her comments! That girl brought so much life into Aelin’s court and I lived for her remarks. She always tried to appear nonchalant and bitchy but deep down within her there’s a heart of gold and by the end of the book even Aelin was able to see it. To think they were enemies and rivals once... I’m so glad they finally became friends. Plus: How cool is it that Lysandra is a shape shifter?!! I mean OMG!!! I didn’t expect that and I was so surprised when I found out. XD
”The soldiers in the sewer were screaming as she tore into them – a death for every day in hell, a death for the childhood taken from her and from Evangeline. She was fury, she was wrath, she was vengeance.”
Elide & Nesryn:
”You told me Dorian would fix the world, make it better. Buf if he’s gone, if we made the mistake today in keeping him alive, then I will find another way to attain that future. And another one after that, if I have to. I will keep getting back up, no matter how many times those butchers shove me down.” - Nesryn
Those two were both strong women in their own way, but I feel like we didn’t get to see all too much of them. I just wish there would have been more scenes with Elide & Nesryn. I mean they both intrigued me and their characters sounded very interesting, in the end I don’t feel like I really got to know them though. *sigh* Well, there are so many characters in Sarah’s books, it’s no wonder some of them fall by the wayside. Let’s hope there will be more of them in Eos! ;-)
”Sam had been tortured in ways she hadn’t even known until she read Wesley’s letter. The worst of it had been requested by Arobynn. Requested, as punishment for Sam’s loving her – punishment for tampering with Arobynn’s belongings.”
That manipulative jerk eventually got what he deserved! But damn I wish it wouldn’t have happened the way it did in the end. To die in his sleep was a death too merciful for him. For all the horrible and atrocious things Arobynn did he should have at least been awake and aware of the fact that he died. I understand why Lysandra could only kill him in his sleep though. *sigh* My poor brave girl!
The friendships & ships:
Aelin & Chaol:
For a heartbeat, she pitied him, and part of her wished she could say it more kindly, more compassionately. “There’s no getting Dorian out. There’s no saving him.”
“Like hell there isn’t.”
THOSE TWO! Gosh, they constantly seemed to be at each other’s throat and they frustrated me immensely! I hated that Aelin thought she couldn’t save Dorian and loved Chaol for never giving up on him, yet at the same time I disliked Chaol for calling Aelin a monster! I swear their anger and the way they treated each other had me all like: No, NO, NO! You’re supposed to help each other!! You’re supposed to save Dorian! Pull yourself together and work it out! GODDAMMIT!!! Thankfully by the end of the book both of them finally realized that they need each other and they eventually made amends. Jeez! It was about time! *sighs deeply* Urgh they were so stressful.
”We do not look back, Chaol. It helps no one and nothing to look back. We can only go on.”
There she was, that queen looking out at him, a hint of the ruler she was becoming. And it knocked the breath out of him, because it made him feel so strangely young – when she now seemed so old.
Rowan & Aelin:
”I could still probably braid this,” she mused. “Very teensy-tiny braids, so – “ He growled, but leaned back against the tub, his eyes closed. “You’re no better than a house cat,” she said, massaging his head. He let out a low noise in his throat that might very well have been a purr.
Haha! I loved it when Rowan lost all common sense at seeing Aelin in a flimsy nightgown! *LOL* Such a mighty fae warrior and then he sees her like that and isn’t even capable to utter a single word. XD Fun times. ;-P Still, I really like their connection and that they are so close to each other, I kind of dislike the notion of Rowan disappearing as an individual though. I just hope that he’ll give her hell in “EoS” again. *lol* Because I lived for their easy banter and the fact that they always gave each other a run for their money! XD It would be boring if Rowan would end up as nothing more than the man at Aelin’s side.
”I spent centuries wandering the world, from empires to kingdoms to wastelands, never settling, never stopping – not for one moment. I was always looking toward the horizon, always wondering what waited across the next ocean, over the next mountain. But I think … I think that whole time, all those centuries, I was just looking for you.”
Manon & Dorian:
He cocked his head. “I’ve never been with a witch.”
Let her rip out his throat for that. End it.
A row of iron fangs snapped down over her teeth as her smile grew. “I’ve been with plenty of men. You’re all the same. Taste the same.” She looked him over as if he were her next meal.
“I dare you,” he managed to say.
Her eyes narrowed, the gold like living embers. He’d never seen anyone so beautiful. This witch had been crafted from the darkness between the stars.
I SHIP THEM SO HARD I CAN’T EVEN!!!! ADKFADSFASDJFKSDFJA! I love it that Manon was the only one who got that Dorian is still alive and I love that she was so drawn to him! And boy those two short conversations they had! THEY GAVE ME LIFE!!! I WANT MORE OF THEM!! Just more!! I want my fierce, ruthless witch and my precious cinnamon roll to be together!!! PLEASEEEEE!!!! *dies out of sheer excitement*
”And through the darkness of his memories, through the pain and despair and terror he’d tried to forget, a name echoed in his head.”
Manon & Asterin:
”That wildness, that untamed fierceness … They weren’t born of a free heart, but of one that had known despair so complete that living brightly, living violently, was the only way to outrun it.”
Asterin’s story broke my heart and I want her to be happy again!!! I hated it so much that they both were at odds with each other and that Asterin had to suffer so much even though she only wanted to help Manon. She loves her. It’s more than just obvious! As it seems Manon had to come a long way until she realized what truly matters, but I think now that she did, she’s finally ready to oppose her matron! I really can’t wait to see THAT fight! XD
”Things are changing,” Manon said.
“Good,” Asterin said. “We’re immortals. Things should change, and often, or they’ll get boring.”
Manon lifted her brows, and her Second grinnend. Manon shook her head and grinned back.
Lysandra & Aedion:
A strange, ever-changing female scent hit him, and Aedion found Lysandra leaning against the hallway door. Tears gleamed in her eyes even as she smiled.
She gazed at the closed bedroom door, as if she could still see the prince and queen inside. “That,” she said, more to herself than to him. “That is what I am going to find one day.”
“A gorgeous Fae warrior?” Aedion said, shifting a bit.
Lysandra chuckled, wiping away her tears, and gave him a knowing look before walking away.
Another ship I want to sail! I think Aedion and Lysandra would make such a great couple! *lol* Besides I’m sure Lysandra might actually be the only one who would be able to keep up with Aedion. Haha! I mean they tease each other so nicely and Aedion is even slightly unsettled when she’s turning into a ghost leopard which means he has a lot of respect for her and this is always important in a relationship! =) Let’s see if Aedion will be Lysandra’s gorgeous Fae warrior in ‘”Eos”! ;-P
Aelin & Dorian:
”It is going to take a while. And it might never be right again. Buy you …” She gripped his hand, as if he hadn’t used those hands to hurt and maim, to stab her. “You will learn to face it, and to endure it. What happened, Dorian, was not your fault.”
I still love their strong friendship, despite Aelin being willing to kill him of course. XD But I guess after meeting those Valg Princes at Wendlyn she was allowed to doubt his survival. Still, they both can change the world together and they are both so strong! I have faith in them and I’m sure if they help each other and stick together they can really shatter the chains of their world and make it right! =)
Dorian & Chaol:
”I didn’t realize I looked that bad,” Dorian said, his voice raw.
He knew then – that the demon inside the prince was gone. Chaol wept.
Dorian surged from the chair and dropped to his knees beside the bed. He grabbed Chaol’s hand, squeezing it as he pressed his brow against his. “You were dead,” the prince said, his voice breaking. “I thought you were dead.”
Those two had me in tears at the end. T_T I was so happy they both found each other again!!! Their friendship went through so much in those last four books and now they are finally together! I love them and I admit it, I even kinda ship them. XD I mean hello, Chaol told Dorian that he loves him! XD Can’t blame me for shipping them, can you?! ;-P Besides, it’s obvious they love each other. At least as friends they do. XD
All told I really loved “Queen of Shadows” and I can’t wait to get to book five! I’m sure Sarah will have a lot in store for us and I’m kinda scared to start it. As long as my precious Gem continues this journey with me I shall be fine though! ;-P Thanks for reading this series with me! XD We just have to read two more books!!! Two more books Gem and we’ll be ready to read “Kingdom of Ash”. =) ...more
Notes are private!
Jun 08, 2018
Jul 13, 2018
Jun 08, 2018
Sep 02, 2014
Sep 11, 2014
it was amazing
”She has no hope, Prince. She has no hope left in her heart. Help her. If not for her sake, then at least for what she represents – what she could off ”She has no hope, Prince. She has no hope left in her heart. Help her. If not for her sake, then at least for what she represents – what she could offer all of us, you included.”
“And what is that?” he dared ask.
Emrys met his gaze unflinchingly as he whispered, “A better world.”
First of all: YES, the rumour is true!
This series really gets better and better with each and every single book! ;-)
Just thought I’d let you know! *lol*
To be honest, after “Crown of Midnight” all I hoped for was that “Heir of Fire” would be able to keep the pace. And tell you what? It actually exceeded my, admittedly, already high expectations! Yes, Sarah! You did an amazing job with this one! I was hooked right from the beginning and I didn’t want to stop to read this damn book!!!
I loved this book, I loved it so freaking much! It was so, so, so, so, SOOO, good!!!
And I was happy with it, I was SO happy with it!
UNTIL… UNTIL the last 20 pages hit me!! ARGH!!! T_T
I thought I’d be able to write about “Heir of Fire” without getting all too emotional but as it seems all my plans and good intentions just went out of the window. I can’t write about this book without getting emotional! I just can’t! It was too much!! That ending was too much!!! WHY?
WHY THE FREAKIDY FREAKING HELL, SARAH!!!!????
How could you do this to me??!!
I LOVE THIS BOOK!
BUT I HATE THIS ENDING SO MUCH!
I hate it,
I love it,
I hate that I love it,
I love that I hate it!
*throws book against the wall*
*a second time*
*for good measure*
Okay, I think I’m ready to continue now. *takes deep breath and collects herself*
All right! Let’s do this!
Just like with “Crown of Midnight” I won’t waste your time by writing about the plot. It’s way too complex to explain it without any spoilers and because of that, I guess it might be best if I just go for another round of “Keyword Boggle”!
It was so much fun the last time around, wasn’t it? ;-P
So here I go: Celaena, Dorian, Chaol, Rowan, Aelin, Manon, Abraxos, Sorscha, The King, magic, faeries, witches, darkness, fire, ice, wind, a kitchen, a healer, an apartment, blood, murder, and let’s not forget about the black stones. XD
I guess by now you could write your own book! *lol*
We’re still speaking about Sarah’s book though, so I’ll head directly into the characters section and won’t keep you in suspense any longer.
Do I still have to say it? Yes? Okay! Beware of my characters section because it’s known as the spoilery spoiler section of my reviews! Don’t read on, close your eyes, eat an ice, please think twice, I’m not nice, my reviews have spice. And spoilers, lots of spoilers, but you already know that or you wouldn’t have continued to read that bad rhyme! ;-P
”So you’d save another land, but not yours. Why can’t your friend save her own kingdom?”
“Because she is dead!” She screamed the last word so loudly it burned in her throat. “Because she is dead, and I am left with my worthless life!”
*sighs deeply* Oh, Celaena! How much pain does this poor girl have to endure? It hurt to read about her feelings after Nehemia’s death, it hurt to read how much she ached and wished she could have been someone else. That she could have saved her friend. That Nehemia would live instead of her. That Chaol would have trusted her. That he would have told her… Oh boy, Celaena’s heart was a black void of desperation and pain that only seemed to get worse before it even got a chance to get better. In the end it did get better though and I’m so happy about that! She finally found her inner strength and she accepted her heritage! Which is awesome, because I really can’t wait for her to kick some ass! *lol* Heaven knows the King’s behind is already a formidable target and please Sarah if there is any justice in your world you’ll let him burn for what he did!!! You’ll let him suffer for all the pain he caused!!! I can’t wait to see Celaena’s power unleashed! Guess the palace is going to be “hot stuff” soon! ;-P
”He had chosen the king. Even though he’d claimed he loved her, he still loyally served that monster. Maybe she had been a fool for letting him in, for dreaming of a world where she could ignore the fact that he was captain to the man who had shattered her life again and again.”
”No, all she could see were the slaves she’d left behind, the ashy mountains and those mass graves they dug every day, the faces of her people, who had worked beside her – her people whom she had left behind. Whom she had let herself forget, had let suffer; who had prayed for salvation, holding out hope that someone, anyone would remember them.
She had abandoned them – and she had been too late.”
”She would not let that light go out. She would fill the world with it, with her light – her gift. She would light up the darkness, so brightly that all who were lost or wounded or broken would find their way to it, a beacon for those who still dwelled in that abyss. It would not take a monster to destroy a monster – but light, light to drive out darkness.
She was not afraid.”
”He was afraid of what they would do to his kingdom. Because this was still his kingdom. He was working for Dorian, not Aelin – not Aedion. And he didn’t know where all of this put him.”
YESH! I know it was a long and hard way for Chaol but as it seems he’s finally on the right track! I loved that he began to question everything. He was so insecure and hurt that he had no other choice than to face his outlook on things and in the end this eventually forced him to see behind the kings carefully kept façade. Which is awesome, because I know deep down within him Chaol is a very good man!!! He was just completely oblivious to the fact that the served a monster! Still, I’m glad he decided for Dorian and I swear if Celaena and Chaol don’t do anything about this damn ending, I’m going to riot!!!! CHAOL you gotta help your Prince and rightful king!!!!
”I will not turn my back on my kingdom or my prince,” Chaol snapped. “I will not fight in your army and slaughter my people. And I will not break my vow to my father.” His honor might very well be all he would have left after the end of this.
Aedion was quiet long enough that Chaol got up to leave. But then the general said, “What would you have given – just to see her again?”
Chaol couldn’t turn around as he said, “It doesn’t matter now.”
Chaol kept his sword drawn. “I will not go to Anielle,” he growled. “And I will not serve you a moment longer. There is one true king in this room – there always has been. And he is not sitting on that throne.”
”Once Dorian might have already said something about it. But having magic, getting drawn into whatever mess Celaena was in, seeing that other world in the secret tunnels … all of that had changed everything. The best he could do these days was maintain a low profile – to keep his father or anyone else from looking too long in his direction.”
WHY SARAH??!! WHYYYYY? *breaks down and sobs* Why do you have to use him as a human punching bag? Dorian is so decent and compassionate; he doesn’t deserve to be broken!!! First you hurt him by finding out about Chaol’s and Celaena’s secret, then you kill off his girlfriend and in the end you even let him be forced into the Kings slavery!!?? LIKE SERIOUSLY!!?? WTFH!!?? WTF!!?? I CAN’T WITH THIS ENDING!!! I JUST CAN’T!!! HE SUFFERED ENOUGH!!! I don’t even want to know what is going to happen now that he’s wearing this freaking collar! He saved Chaol’s life! GODDAMNIT!!! GIVE MY BOY A BREAK!!! Sarah, I swear it here and now if Dorian isn’t saved by the end of book 4 I won’t continue to read this series. I just won’t! I know it’s the author’s right and decision to kill off characters or to make them suffer as they please, but I just can’t take it anymore. Dorian is my cutiepie and cinnamon roll and I think my heart hurts enough! I survived 3 books of ACOTAR watching how my precious Lucien went through hell and I just can’t take this anymore. Lucien never got his happily ever after and it still hurts!!! So no, sorry but no! If Dorian isn’t at least halfway alright after “Queen of Shadows” then I’m quitting this series! Period! I made up my mind! There was so much potential to give Dorian’s character a chance to evolve and to be awesome and interesting! So much raw magic that could have been used, but all that happened was that Sorscha died and Dorian sacrificed himself for Chaol. I’m pissed, I’m majorly pissed! And coming from me that means a lot! So yeah, this wrong is better set right or I’m quitting! I’m serious and I mean it! This said:
#TeamDorian forever and for always!!! <333
”He’d been a fool once, swearing he would tear the world apart for Celaena. A boy in love with a wildfire – or believing he was in love with one.”
”Because you’re not really scared of those things, are you? No – it’s what they represent. The change. But let me tell you,” Dorian breathed, his magic flickering and then subsiding in a flash of pain, “things have already changed. And changed because of you. I have magic – there is no undoing that, not getting rid of it. And as for Celaena …” He clamped down on the power that surged as he imagined – for the first time, he realized – what it was to be her. “As for Celaena,” he said again, “you do not have the right to wish she were not what she is. The only thing you have a right to do is decide whether you are her enemy or her friend.”
”We’re all risking something.” There was so little of the friend he’d grown up with. The prince glanced at his pocket watch. “I need to go.” Dorian stalked to the stairs, and there was no fear in his face, no doubt, as he said, “You gave me the truth today, so I’ll share mine: even if it meant us being friends again, I don’t think I would want to go back to how it was before – who I was before. And this …” He jerked his chin towards the scattered crystals and the bowl of water. “I think this is a good change, too. Don’t fear it.”
”Handsome was a light way of describing what Aedion was. Overwhelming was more like it. Towering and heavily muscled, Aedion was every inch the warrior rumor claimed him to be.”
I like Aedion! I like him a lot!!! He’s such a tortured soul and he tried everything possible in order to protect his people! He was an intriguing new character and I can’t wait to see more of him. I really liked his interactions with Dorian because they were so much fun! *lol* Those two have a lot of potential to become close friends, but I guess the ending of this book kind of nullified that possibility. Still, I want Aedion’s noble and brave soul to be rescued as well and I don’t even want to know what the king is going to do with him. T_T I hope Aelin returns soon because her boys definitely need her right now! Poor Aedion, he waited for so long!!! And if I’m already at it! He saved Chaol’s ass too, so Chaol better get his groove on! He needs to make plans to save him as well! XD
”Cousin – that had been his most beloved title. Cousin, kin, protector. Those were the secret names he harboured deep within, the names he whispered to himself when the northern wind was shrieking through the Staghorns.”
”Aelin would come back from Wendlyn, no matter what the captain believed. Aelin would come back, and when she did … With every breath, Aedion felt that lingering scent wrapping tighter around his heart and soul. When she came back, he was never letting her go.”
”All you monsters can burn in hell. Because my queen is coming – and she will spike you to the walls of your godsdamned castle. And I can’t wait to help her gut you like the pig you are.” He spat at the king’s feet, right on top of the fake ring that had stopped bouncing.
”She noticed then that his arms were bandaged, and more bandages across his broad chest peeked up from beneath his shirt. She’d burned him again. And yet he had held on to her – had run all the way here and not let go once.”
The fierce, broody and intense warrior! I like him even though I have to admit that his abilities as a teacher kind of lack experience. *lol* Still, he’s a decent fae and despite the way he acted at the beginning of the book his heart actually seems to be in the right place. I loved that he took care of Celaena once he realised why she’s so broken and I suppose their fight at the beginning was kind of necessary. They both needed to let off some steam. XD I genuinely hope we’ll see more of him in the next book, because I feel like there is so much more to tell! ;-)
”How – how did you come back from that kind of loss?”
“I didn’t. For a long while I couldn’t. I think I’m still … not back. I might never be.”
She nodded, lips pressed tight, and glanced toward the window.
“But maybe,” he said, quietly enough that she looked at him again. He didn’t smile, but his eyes were inquisitive. “Maybe we could find the way back together.”
Silent as death, Manon slid up behind him. The fool didn’t even know she was there until she brought her mouth close to his ear and whispered, “Wrong kind of witch.”
I’M IN LOVE WITH MANON BLACKBEAK!!! This woman is so savage and fierce! I love it! *lol* As it seems for once my prayers were answered! I got more of the iron teeth witches and I loved every single chapter! XD Manon is so damn amazing! I just couldn’t get enough of her and followed her storyline closely. Truth be told, I just want to lean back and watch how her and Abraxos change the world. Haha! I disliked Manon’s grandmother a lot though and even though she became Wing Leader I’m pretty sure there will be some major estrangement in the future. Still, I loved Manon’s connection with Asterin and her Thirteen and I really hope they’ll always be at her side. Maybe Petrah will join them one day? Idk! I truly hope she’ll be fine some day because I really liked her too. >_<
”You’re mine,” Manon said to him.
The wyvern blinked at her, Titus’s blood still dripping from his cracked and broken teeth, and Manon had the feeling that he had come to the same decision. Perhaps he had known long before tonight, and his fight with Titus hadn’t been so much about survival as it had been a challenge to claim her.
As his rider. As his mistress. As his.”
”And Manon, because no one was watching, because she did not care, flung out her arms as well and savoured the freefall, the wind now a song in her ears, in her shriveled heart.”
”You touch him again,” Manon said, “and I’ll drink the marrow from your bones.”
The friendships & ships:
Chaol & Dorian:
He met Dorian’s gaze. There was nothing kind in it. But Dorian said, “I’m trying, Chaol.”
Trying, because Chaol’s not consulting him on the plan to get Celaena out of Adarlan had been a breach of trust, and one that shamed him, though Dorian could never know that, either. “I know.”
Oh, those two broke my heart! I really wanted them to solve their problems and then this damn ending came along!!! ARGH! They need a chance to fix all this! Sarah give them a chance, please!? They deserve it! And OMG Chaol told Dorian that he loves him!!! Way too late but he did it!!! <33 I just want my two boys to be happy and friends again. *sobs* They both suffered enough in those last two books, they really deserve some peace!!! And to take away their chance to make amends!! So mean, Sarah! So, so mean!!! >_<
”You think I’d run to my father?” The words were barely more than a strangled whisper as the temperature plummeted.
Chaol stepped forward, putting himself between Aedion and Dorian, his palms exposed. Placating. “I can’t afford to guess – to hope. Even with you.”
”You cannot pick and choose what parts of her to love.” He pitied Chaol, he realized. His heart hurt for his friend, for all that Chaol had surely been realizing these past few months. “Just as you cannot pick which parts of me you accept.”
”He looked at his friend, perhaps for the last time, and said what he had always known, from the moment they’d met, when he’d understood that the prince was his brother in soul. “I love you.” Dorian merely nodded, eyes still blazing, and lifted his hands again towards his father. Brother. Friend. King.
Sorscha & Dorian:
”She usually talked like this when she was nervous. Which, Dorian had noticed with some satisfaction, was when he came near. And not in a bad way – if he’d sensed that she was truly uncomfortable, he’d have kept his distance. This was more … flustered. He liked flustered.”
I suppose their relationship was doomed right from the beginning but I still would have liked it to work out. They were so sweet together, but I can’t shake the feeling that I missed some major parts of their plot. I really wish Sarah would have given us more of them because to me their entire storyline felt kinda rushed. Still, I was glad Sorscha helped Dorian to hide his magic and her being a spy was such an unexpected plot twist. >_< It really killed me when the King ordered her death and I can’t even describe how much Dorian’s pain hurt me! T_T I’m still not over this… probably I’ll never be!
”Yes,” he breathed, and kissed her. It was fast – but her face was flushed, and her eyes wide as he pulled back. His own eyes were wide, gods be damned, and he was still rubbing his thumb against her soft cheek. Still contemplating going back for more, because that hadn’t been nearly enough.”
Celaena & Rowan:
”Why don’t you just bite me again?”
“Why don’t I give you the lashing you deserve?”
He looked so dead set on it that she blinked. “If you ever take a whip to me, I will skin you alive.”
Oh, ho ho! Those two!! So much passion, so much pain! They were quite a sight to behold! *lol* I loved how their initial animosity turned into a solid friendship and I was so glad Celaena finally told someone about her past! This was so damn necessary and I’m glad Rowan was there to listen to her troubles and fears! <3 I’m sure they’ll become lovers in the future, but as it seems Sarah just wants to torture us a little bit more. ;-P After all she’s good at that, torture seems to be her middle name! XD Bet the J. is just a fib! Haha!
”It was a selfish wish, and a fool’s hope.” She read the rest of it in his eyes. But it came true. “Dangerous, for a prince of ice and wind to pray to the Fire-Bringer,” she managed to say.
Rowan shrugged, a secret smile on his face as he wiped away the tear that escaped down her cheek. “For some reason, Mala likes me, and agreed that you and I make a formidable pair.”
Okay, I think I ranted enough now. *lol* So yeah, I hope I’ll get my hands on “Queen of Shadows” soon and that my precious Gem will continue this journey with me! I even wrote nice things about Chaol!! That’s got to count! ;-P ...more
Notes are private!
Mar 12, 2018
Apr 28, 2018
Mar 12, 2018
Apr 26, 2016
Apr 26, 2016
it was amazing
”The head is too wise. The heart is all fire.”
There’s no better way to start this review than with this quote, because after reading this series my he ”The head is too wise. The heart is all fire.”
There’s no better way to start this review than with this quote, because after reading this series my heart is truly all fire. When I began to read “The Raven Boys” in October 2017 I had no idea that I’d love this series so much. I was completely oblivious to the fact that those boys would take over my entire world and I had no clue that I’d become so attached to them. I just didn’t know what I was getting myself into but after finishing the last book I can say that I don’t regret anything!!! XD
Over those last seven months I’ve been on a long journey with my boys. I cheered for them, I suffered with them, I was sad and despaired, I was hopeful and happy. I sighed, I laughed, I cried, I tore at my hair, I screamed, I dreamed, and I died about a thousand deaths!
In short: I lived and breathed those books!!!
They became an integral part of me and my life and I actually feel like I’ve become one of the Raven Boys as well. I guess that means that in some way I kind of made a bargain with Cabeswater too. Uh oh! XD
What I want to say is that I love those characters so much, I feel like every attempt to put it into words is automatically bound to fail. There are no words to describe how intensely I feel about those boys and even if I’d become a hundred years, I still wouldn’t be able to express all of my feelings.
It’s an impossible task and maybe this is good the way it is. It’s part of the magic of those books and truth be told, I’m convinced we all need a little magic in our lives every once in a while. ;-)
So, speaking of magic:
There was lightning and thunder outside of my window when I finished this book.
It looked like the end of the world.
To read those final pages of “The Raven King”?!
It FELT like the end of the world…
I will miss my boys and Maggie’s unique magic so damn much! T_T *sobs and is unconsolable*
”You were the one who told me, Ronan, that something was starting, all those months ago. Now’s not the time to be going rogue. Someone’s going to get killed. No more playing around. There’s no more time for anything but truth. We’re supposed to be in this together, whatever this is.”
I think this quote is kind of giving direction to the entire last book because after the third sleeper was woken up a lot of strange things begin to happen. Our boys have a lot of different troubles to face and to say they are in deep doo-doo would be putting it more than just mildly. *lol* They don’t only have to work on the discrepancies among each other, but also outside of their magical world and inside of Cabeswater. In short: There’s a whole wagon of feels that’s going to hit you, and it’s going to hit you hard! Don’t say I didn’t warn you! ;-P
”Leaves,” Ronan Lynch’s voice said, full of intention.
“Dust,” Adam Parrish said.
“Wind,” Blue Sargent said.
“Shit,” Henry Cheng added.
I’m sure this is the moment the people who know my reviews have been waiting for. Yes, you already know what’s coming. ;-) Let’s make it official then: This is my spoiler section and if you don’t want to be spoiled you better leave now! Because this was the last and final book and I’m going to spoil the hell out of you if you didn’t read the other three. XD Fair warning, sound advice! Take it or leave it! It’s up to you! ;-P
Gansey – The King:
”He was a book, and he was holding his final pages, and he wanted to get to the end to find out how it went, and he didn’t want it to be over.”
Oh, Gansey. My troubled soul! I once again felt so sorry for him and to top it all off we finally found out that he actually knows he’s going to die. Of course I should have known that he would figure it out, but for some reason I thought he was unaware of his impending death. Well, turns out he knew it all along. *sigh* The way it all happened in the end was so unexpected though. I didn’t see this coming… NOT AT ALL and I think I was at least as devastated as Gansey when he found out that Glendower had been dead for years. My heart bled for him… for him and his wishes and all his unfulfilled dreams. T_T
”It was this: this moment and no other moment, and for the first time that Gansey could remember, he knew what it would feel like to be present in his own life.”
”Gansey’s death had been foretold for this year. It was him. It was always going to be him.
Glendower was dead. He’d always been dead.
And Gansey kind of wanted to live.”
Blue – The Mirror Tree:
”Her hair had got wilder since he first met her, less contained by all of her clips, and her mouth had got messier since he met her, more desirous of forbidden kisses, and her stance had got harder, her spine sharpened by grief and peril.”
It was really nice to find out about Artemus’ origins and it caused me understand Blue a little bit better. It explained why she always felt wrong in her own skin and I guess it also explains why Gansey and she had this special connection. XD Still, in some way the reveal of her background story only confused me even more and I don’t even dare to say it but after four entire books, I still don’t feel like I really know her character. *lol* After BLLB her character became less tangible again and I really don’t know why. Maybe Maggie, that genius master mind, planned it that way? I guess I’ll never know. *shrugs*
”Blue was filled with frustration that her life was so clearly demarcated. Things that were not enough, but that she could have. Things that were something more, that she couldn’t.
Adam – The Magician:
”It seemed like he should become stranger, more other, when he was near Cabeswater, but in reality, the closer he was to Cabeswater, the more firmly present he remained. His mind didn’t have to wander far to communicate with Cabeswater when his body was able to lift a hand to touch it.”
I AM AND ALWAYS WILL BE IN LOVE WITH ADAM PARRISH! There I said it out loud! *lol* Don’t get me wrong, of course I still love Ronan too, but Ronan reminds me too much of myself. XD I love him in sense of Philia and Agape whereas Adam Parrish is my Eros and Agape. Haha! Does that make sense? Guess to all of you who had some serious Greek philosophy lessons it does. ;-P Well anyway, I love Adam and what he has become and I was so damn proud of him throughout the entire book. Despite his father and everything that happened to him he’s become a beautiful human being and I just love him for it! <333 He’s strong now, he found his way and nothing can stop him. Not even a stupid demon that’s trying to possess him! YAY! Gosh I just love my boy!!! My Adam! <333 *heart eyes* Still, Maggie why did you have to hurt him so much?! T_T
”Stop saying privilege. Love isn’t privilege. But Gansey had always had love, had always been capable of love. Now that Adam had discovered his feelings in himself, he was more certain than ever that he was right. Need was Adam’s baseline, his resting pulse. Love was a privilege. Adam was privileged; he didn’t want to give it up. He wanted to remember again and again how it felt.”
”For Adam, it meant linking in to the ley line that pulsed beneath the forest, unwrapping himself and allowing the bigger pattern inside. It was a process that was both eerie and awesome to watch from the outside. Adam; then Adam vacated; then Adam, more.”
”Do you know what hurts the most? What this means you think of me. You didn’t even give me the chance to be OK with it. You were just so sure I’d be eaten by jealousy. That’s how you see me?”
Ronan – The Greywaren:
”It was too cold for fireflies, but a multitude of them glistened in and out of being above the fields nonetheless. Those were his. Fanciful, purposeless, but lovely.
Ronan Lynch loved to dream about light.”
As it seems Ronan is always good for a surprise. *lol* I didn’t expect that Matthew was one of his dreams and I certainly didn’t expect the revelation about Cabeswater! XD I mean OMG!! Ronan dreamed Cabeswater into life!!! To dream a place like that? Gosh, he must be so damn powerful and skilled af!! Sounds like my boy? Yes, it does! ;-) I loved that he finally made peace with Declan and that the three Lynch brothers got along so well in the end. It made me happy to see them like that and I wish it could have stayed that way, but no Maggie had to break my heart into thousand pieces. As Ronan’s twin I felt with him when Aurora died and boy was it painful!!! WHY MAGGIE!!?? WHY??!! GOSH DAMN IT! RONAN LOST HIS FATHER AND NOW YOU HAD TO TAKE HIS MOTHER AS WELL???? You made him and orphan!!! He would have deserved so much better than that!!! T_T To see Ronan suffer and cry? It hurt so damn much… I can’t even…. *sobs*
”In this other place, it was easy to tell that the music was the sound of Ronan’s soul. Hungry and prayerful, it whispered of dark places, old places, fire and sex.”
”Ronan Lynch’s stare was a snake on the pavement where you wanted to walk. It was a match left on your pillow. It was pressing your lips together and tasting your own blood.”
”Ronan skidded to his knees, his arms around her, and it hurt Adam, somehow, to watch how ferociously he hugged his little strange dream creature, and how she buried her face into his shoulder. He stood with her in his arms, holding her tightly, and he heard him saying, No, you did good, it’s going to be OK, we’re waking up.”
”Ronan crouched beside him, black still smeared on his face under his nose and around his ears. His dreamt firefly rested on Gansey’s heart. “Wake up, you bastard,” he said. “You fucker. I can’t believe that you would…”
And he began to cry.
Noah – The Ghost:
”My mom always said he was a firecracker, which just meant he was always getting speeding tickets and jumping on tables at family reunions and stuff. He always had so many ideas. He was so hyper.”
I don’t know about you, but I would have loved to get to know this hyper Noah. His story made me so damn sad and I really wish he would have had a chance to get his happily ever after. Unfortunately he didn’t get what he deserved and I can only hope that he’s happy wherever he is now. The way I see it Noah chose to safe Gansey when he died the first time. He did it in order to guarantee that Cabeswater could save him the second time around and in a strange way this actually makes sense. XD Still, Noah Czerny is adorable and precious and he would have deserved the world!!! T_T RIP Noah! <333
”Blue didn’t care that he – it – Noah – was strange and decaying and frightening. She knew that he – it – Noah was strange and decayed and frightened, and she knew that she loved him anyway.”
”Goodbye,” Noah said. “Don’t throw it away.”
Henry – The Special Extra:
”Once, you got me coffee,” Henry said. “When I was losing my mind. Consider the favour returned.”
Why was Henry introduced so late?! I loved that boy!!! He’s amazing and funny and honest and pure!!! I really wish he would have been a bigger part of this! I would have loved to read more about him and I instantly felt a connection to this awesome boy! I was so sorry when I found out that he had been kidnapped and I truly loved him for acting to safe Blue’s principles in front of the others. *lol* It makes me sad that I probably will never read about him again and I really hope Maggie will include him in one of her future stories. Please, Maggie! *makes huge puppy eyes*
”What do you want me to say?”
“Nothing yet,” Henry said. “I want you to think about it. And then I hope you will choose to trust me. Because I’m overfull on secrets and underfed on friends.”
”But it wasn’t that Henry was less of himself in English. He was less of himself out loud. His native language was thought.”
The Demon & Piper:
I already didn’t like Piper in “Blue Lily, Lily Blue” but my initial dislike for her grew into an even bigger monster in this book. I really started to hate her with a fierce passion and in the end all I wanted was for her to drop dead. *lol* I know those are strong and negative feelings coming from me but I really hated her so much! XD Piper and that mean demon almost killed my lovely boys so I think I’m kind of entitled to feel that way. I always knew that the demon would kill her and if you ask me he waited way too long to do it. *lol* Whoopsie, was that mean? *smiles innocently*
Henry & Gansey:
”Now get out,” Henry said.
Gansey looked at him. “I beg your pardon?”
“Stop driving,” he said. “I know you need to. You’ve needed to since we left. Get. Out.”
I loved the chemistry between Gansey and Henry! Yep, chemistry! Don’t even try to say there is none because it was all over the place!!! XD It was so amazing to watch and I couldn’t help but marvel at their interactions. It was wonderful how Henry always knew what Gansey needed and it was so funny that Gansey had no other choice than to accept it because he knew Henry was right. =)) I really wish we could have seen more of them and I truly hope there will be some sort of short story in the future. I know Maggie is busy, but I can always hope, right?! ;-P
”It’s like we’ve met each other before. No, not really. We are friends at once, we would instantly do what friends would do for each other. Not just pals. Friends. Blood brothers. You just feel it. We instead of you and me. That’s jeong.”
Ronan & Blue:
”Emptying another student’s backpack over his car. I don’t really want to talk about it.”
“I do,” Ronan said.
“Well, I don’t. I’m not proud of it.”
Ronan patted her leg. “I’ll be proud for you.”
Those two!!! *LOL* I will say it again and again! I love how close they became over those last few books and whenever they spoke with each other it always made me smile. Ronan’s reaction to her scar was priceless and it was so damn adorable that he was proud of her getting suspended! XD Their dynamic is so much fun and I’m so glad they started to get along so well. =)))
”Look, Sargent,” Ronan retorted. “I was gonna dream you some eye cream last night since clearly modern medicine’s doing jack shit for you, but I nearly had my ass handed to me by a death snake from the fourth circle of dream hell, so you’re welcome.”
Blue looked appropriately touched. “Ah, thanks, man.”
“No problem, bro.”
Ronan & Adam aka Ronam:
”Adam felt a surge of both accomplishment and nerves. He skated an edge here. Making Ronan Lynch smile felt as charged as making a bargain with Cabeswater. These weren’t forces to play with.”
I CAN’T EVEN!! MY HEART!!! MY. HEART.!!! I loved every little moment between them, every single gesture, every eye contact, every smile, every playful remark!!! THEY ARE EVERYTHING!!! Their first kiss blew me away and I was so happy I couldn’t stop smiling for two days! And OMG!!! Ronan thinking about Adam’s hands? It was my undoing! I love hands, I love Adam, I love Ronan! ARGH! I think I’m going to die! And what a wonderful death it would be!!! Still, nothing, really nothing could prepare me for CHAPTER 39!!! PERFECTION, UTTER AND SHEER PERFECTION!!! I read this chapter about a thousand times. It still moves me, it makes me cry! <333 *shakes head and fights tears* I just love them so much… Thank you Maggie! *sobs*
”He had memorized the shape of Adam’s hands in particular: the way his thumb jutted awkwardly, boyishly; the roads of the prominent veins; the large knuckles that punctuated his long fingers. In dreams Ronan put them to his mouth.
His feelings for Adam were an oil spill; he’d let them overflow and now there wasn’t a damn place in the ocean that wouldn’t catch fire if he dropped a match.”
”Asshole,” Ronan said.
Adam smiled cheerily. Ronan would start wars and burn cities for that true smile, elastic and amiable.”
”When Adam kissed him, it was every mile per hour Ronan had ever gone over the speed limit. It was every window-down, goose-bumps-on-skin, teeth-chattering-cold night drive. It was Adam’s ribs under Ronan’s hands and Adam’s mouth on his mouth, again and again and again. It was stubble on lips and Ronan having to stop, to get his breath, to restart his heart. They were both hungry animals, but Adam had been starving for longer.”
”They sprawled on the living room sofa and Adam studied the tattoo that covered Ronan’s back: all the sharp edges that hooked wondrously and fearfully into each other.
“Unguibus et rostro,” Adam said.
Ronan put Adam’s fingers to his mouth.
He was never sleeping again.
Blue & Gansey:
”And third, most importantly, Gansey was outrageously and eternally driven to distraction by the image of her behind the wheel of his car. Ronan and Adam weren’t with them, so there was no one to catch them in what felt like an incredibly indecent act.”
Don’t you love it that Gansey thinks Blue driving his Camaro is an “incredibly indecent act”? *LOL* Those two are so innocent it’s not even normal. Haha! Where Adam and Ronan are all fire, tension and heat, Gansey and Blue are almost too shy and sweet. XD I was so happy they finally decided to tell the others and the chapter of Henry Cheng’s toga party gave me life!!! Seriously, I loved this party so damn much! It’s a perfect example of Maggie’s awesome writing skills and I truly wish this chapter would have never ended. =))) I’m so happy they can be together now and forgive me this pun, but I think their first kiss was rather breathtaking, don’t you agree? ;-P *lol*
”It was Blue’s shoulder and her collarbone and her legs and her throat and her laugh her laugh her laugh. He couldn’t stop looking at her, and here, it didn’t matter, because no one here cared that they were together. Here, he could play his fingers over her fingers as they stood close, she could lean her cheek on his bare shoulder, he could hook his ankle playfully in hers, she could catch herself with an arm around his waist. Here he was unbelievably greedy for that laugh.”
”Right after he spoke, Blue threw her arms tightly around his neck. Right after he spoke, she pressed her face into the side of his. Right after he spoke, she held him like a shouted word. Love, love, love.
It was such a wonderful journey! I’m so sad it’s over now. T_T I will miss my boys so much! I will miss their comments, their unconditional love, their easy banter. *sniff* This series goes straight to my favourite shelf and it will stay there forever! <333
Thank you, Maggie!
Also, a big thanks to my lovely Adam! Thank you for holding my hand throughout the entire book. I was so lucky to have you at my side. I think I couldn’t have done this without your support and I’m so glad we read this together! <333
”That’s all there is.”
(No, not really! I could have gone on and on but I already reached the gr word limit. So, yeah I’m sorry guys! *lol*) ...more
Notes are private!
Mar 10, 2018
Apr 23, 2018
Mar 10, 2018
Feb 21, 2012
Apr 01, 2014
it was amazing
”Why do we smile? Why do we laugh? Why do we feel alone? Why are we sad and confused? Why do we read poetry? Why do we cry when we see a painting? Why ”Why do we smile? Why do we laugh? Why do we feel alone? Why are we sad and confused? Why do we read poetry? Why do we cry when we see a painting? Why is there a riot in the heart when we love? Why do we feel shame? What is that thing in the pit of your stomach called desire?”
I think I rarely read an introduction to a book that touched me as much as this one did. It were exactly questions like that I asked myself when I was a young and confused teen. I was always more serious than the other kids and there were things they just didn’t understand. When I was seventeen life was tough for me, at least more tough than for other people my age. I asked myself questions they wouldn’t ask themselves for decades and I had to ask those questions because life and my personal experiences kind of forced me to.
Just like Ari, I was thinking about so many things, wondering about my place in this world. Why did some things have to end? Why did others start? Why did my heart hurt so much? Gosh, I really wish I would have had this book in my teens, because it definitely would have made me feel better. “Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe” certainly is a book that’s important and needed! It’s one of those reads that is able to change you, to help you and I really, really wish I would have had it back then. XD It captured the problems of adolescence so damn well and because of that, it’s easily become one of my all-time favourites. =)
”Sometimes I think my father has all these scars. On his heart. In his head. All over.”
The problem about those scars is that no one can see them and most people don’t even bother to try to understand. I loved that Ari truly wanted to know what his father felt and that he wanted him to tell him about his feelings and thoughts. But just like Ari (and basically everyone else on this world) his father was a creature of his experiences and his environment. The war he had fought had changed him and the experience with his eldest son had shaped him as well. It’s never easy to talk about things that are so close to our heart, but Ari’s father made an effort and I think that counts for something.
”You were looking for me,” he said.
I looked at him.
“In your dream. You were looking for me.”
“I’m always looking for you,” I whispered.
”I got to thinking that poems were like people. Some people you got right off the bat. Some people you just didn’t get – and never would get.”
I guess in some way this sentence explains a lot about the book. There were people Ari didn’t understand and there were people who understood him pretty well but couldn’t seem to be able to convey it. For instance his parents and Dante. Dante understood him more than anyone else and I think in some way he might have even hated him for it. At least at the beginning of the book. The more time passed the less he saw him as a threat. It’s just that Dante always asked the right questions, he is honest and very outspoken and therefore the complete opposite of Ari who always keeps his feelings and words to himself.
While Dante admits that he loves Ari (and this pretty early on in the book), Ari isn’t only unable to accept his own feelings but also incapable to voice them properly. He’s overwhelmed and he feels helpless. So basically just like any other teen, right? *lol*
”I love swimming,” he said again. He was quiet for a little while. And then he said, “I love swimming – and you.”
I didn’t say anything.
“Swimming and you, Ari. Those are the things I love the most.”
And even though Ari tells him not to voice those thoughts it’s still obvious that he feels the same way about Dante as well. Call me crazy but in some way this was really beautiful to watch. XD I mean we have a boy who knows exactly what he wants and we have a boy who questions everything and doesn’t even know who he is. Still, there’s no doubt Ari loves Dante too, because even though he can’t admit it, his thoughts speak their own language.
”And it seemed to me that Dante’s face was a map of the world. A world without any darkness.
Wow, a world without darkness. How beautiful was that?”
Despite all this, it was still amazing to see that their friendship was able to survive every blow of fate that was thrown their way. I just loved their dynamic and the fact that they knew each other inside out. Their friendship was #friendshipgoals and it were always those little, to some people rather insignificant moments, which touched me the most and automatically warmed my heart.
”How many burgers did you flip to buy the book?”
“That’s a very Dante question,” I said.
“That’s a very Ari answer,” he said.
And then we started laughing and couldn’t stop.
Also can I say how much I loved the way Ari described his relationship to his mother? Those two had me close to tears more often than once and I just adored the way they spoke with each other, how open and extremely honest they were. Ari’s and Dante’s moms definitely are #momgoals and I strive to become an awesome mother like that too! <3
”I could feel my mom listening to me. She was always there. I hated her for that. And loved her.”
”And I knew that there was something about me that Mrs. Quintana saw and loved. And even though I felt it was a beautiful thing, I also felt it was a weight. Not that she meant it to be a weight. But love was always something heavy for me. Something I had to carry.”
All told, I really loved this book and I can recommend it to every teenager who feels lost and alone. “Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe” is a wonderful and exceptionally beautiful read. It’s full of poetry and the important questions of life, it’s a journey with a beginning and an end and it’s so damn relatable that you can’t help but fall in love with it.
I’m sure young and old will enjoy it and I hope everyone who reads it will discover the secrets of the universe as well. Sometimes the journey is everything that truly matters. ;-P
(view spoiler)[The ending was sooo beautiful!!! <333 *sobs*
”All this time I had been trying to figure out the secrets of the universe, the secrets of my own body, of my own heart. All of the answers had always been so close and yet I had always fought them without even knowing it. From the minute I’d met Dante, I had fallen in love with him. I just didn’t let myself know it, think it, feel it. My father was right. And it was true what my mother said. We all fight our own private wars.” (hide spoiler)]
I’m finally reading this!!! =))
I swear, I wanted to read this book for ages and even wrote it on my TBR list for 2018.
Well and then I saw that it’s super expensive. Even for my kindle. I mean EUR 11,20 is a pretty hefty price for an e-book. (At least if you consider that you don’t even have an actual book after purchasing it!) >_<
So I decided to wait and then something magical happened when I was at the library last week.
I found “Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe” in the middle of a cart that was full of returned books and it almost felt like destiny wanted me to grab it.
And that’s exactly what I did! *imagine a He-Man like moment with his precious sword, only that it was this book for me* XD I let out a delighted squeal (I doubt He-Man ever did this but that’s not the point) and rushed to the next best library terminal to borrow it for FREE!!!
I’m still chuckling like mad and I’m sooo going to read the hell out of this book!
Universe, this better be good! *lol*
P.S: I think I read too much “Ready Player One” lately! Sorry! ;-P ...more
Notes are private!
Sep 03, 2018
Sep 20, 2018
Nov 29, 2017
Oct 21, 2014
Dec 29, 2015
it was amazing
“Humans were so circular; they lived the same slow cycles of joy and misery over and over, never learning. Every lesson in the universe had to be taug “Humans were so circular; they lived the same slow cycles of joy and misery over and over, never learning. Every lesson in the universe had to be taught billions of times, and it never stuck.”
Oh my!!! She did it once again!
Whenever I’m convinced that Maggie’s last book was already the peak of perfection she always manages to persuade me otherwise! I don’t really know how she does it, but she’s soo damn good at what she does that it’s almost impossible not to love her books!!! <3
Needless to say that it was exactly the same with “Blue Lily, Lily Blue”!! XD
This book was so marvellous!!
I loved “The Raven Boys”,
I adored “The Dream Thieves”
BUT I was a complete sucker for “Blue Lily, Lily Blue”!!!
If it wasn’t already official, it definitely is now! I’m Maggie Stiefvater trash through and through and I just can’t imagine a world without her books anymore!!! *lol*
They give me LIFE!!! They make me feel! And over those last three months they’ve actually become the air that I breathe!!
I’m IN LOVE with Maggie’s writing AND each and every single one of her Raven Boys! <333
Their struggles, their anger, their pain, their hopes, their fears, their dreams, their vulnerability!!! It all feels so damn real!!! GOSH!!! I can’t even!!! XD
With every single book they’ve become even more palpable and real! I feel so strongly for those four boys it’s like they are actual people, like they are some of my closest friends! =))
And for that I’ll always be grateful!!! Maggie you’re an amazing writer!!! I hope you know that!! ;-P
(Just in case no one ever bothered to tell you… Which I truly doubt, but still!! *lol*)
”The most infuriating part about Maura’s disappearance was that Blue didn’t know if she was supposed to be consumed by worry or anger. She vacillated wildly between the two, occasionally burning herself out and feeling nothing at all.”
As the title of the book already indicates Blue is the focus of the third book! This time around we’re dealing with the troubles of 300 Fox Way and the huge void that was left after Maura’s sudden and completely unexpected disappearance at the end of book two. Of course this wouldn’t be a Maggie Stiefvater book if we wouldn’t get plenty of additional information about the lives of the Raven Boys as well. So don’t worry and be assured that there will be many moments with our lovely and awesome boys. I guess I don’t even need to mention it, but I’m certain you’ll appreciate each and every single one of them! ;-)
”Blue was perfectly aware that it was possible to have a friendship that wasn’t all-encompassing, that wasn’t blinding, deafening, maddening, quickening. It was just that now that she’d had this kind, she didn’t want the other.”
This is the moment I make sure to warn you about upcoming spoilers and quotes! ;-) If you haven’t read the book already you better click that tiny “x” button! It’s sound advice, I swear! ;-P
Gansey – The Knight:
”The Camaro was like Gansey tonight: terrifying and thrilling, willing to do whatever she asked.”
I swear, this time around I almost couldn’t bear it to read Gansey’s POV!!! My heart is bleeding for this poor boy and the more I get to know him the more it hurts!!! He’s such a gentle, honourable and delicate soul! If I had to draw a comparison I’d say the Gansey in “Blue Lily, Lily Blue” was like a Chinese Ming Vase: So damn beautiful to look at but so fragile and ancient that you could literally see the fissures spreading in his armour! He is so broken on the inside and I think Blue’s conversation with Malory made that more than just clear. When he told her that Gansey didn’t just claw his face but also was completely traumatized after his incident with the hornets I actually felt a lump in my throat!! This chapter was so intense I almost forgot to breathe and even though it hurts me so much to watch Gansey, I still want to know how it all ends!!! Please Maggie, don’t let him die!!! >_<
”There was another pause, and Gansey realized she’d hung up. He leaned back against the fridge, eyes closed, guilty, comforted, wild, contained. In twenty-four hours, he’d be waiting for this again.
”Gansey didn’t so much visit as get absorbed.
He loved it. He wanted to be a part of this world, even though he understood there were endless reasons why he could never be. Blue was the natural result of a home like this: confident, strange, credulous, curious. And here he was: neurotic, rarified, the product of something else entirely.”
”It’s very decent of you,” he continued, “to not say anything about it to me. It’s more than I deserved. But know that I’ve regretted it, a lot.”
Blue – The Mirror:
”Maura was always telling her, Look at the potential you hold inside yourself!
Potential for other people, though. Not for Blue.
Since this book was rather Blue centred I finally had the feeling that I actually got to know her a little bit better! No matter what I did, I just couldn’t seem to be able to grasp her character in the first two books. But now that I read “Blue Lily, Lily Blue” it was so much easier to understand her motives and the reasons why she’s acting the way she does. I felt so sorry for her because she actually suffered a lot! >_< The situation with her missing mother, her relationship to the boys and her intense feelings for Gansey, the troubles of finding a good college and last but not least Persephone’s unexpected death!!! T_T It’s quite a lot to have on your plate when you’re as young as her and I think she was very brave and strong for keeping it together for so long! <3
”She was tired of Persephone and Calla and her mother withholding information because Blue wasn’t psychic. Of not being able to daydream of fancy colleges because she wasn’t rich. Of not being able to hold Gansey’s hand because they couldn’t hurt Adam’s feelings and not being able to kiss Gansey’s mouth because she didn’t want to kill him. She was tired of knowing that he was going to die and being afraid that her mother would, too.
Adam – The Magician:
”He knew he was different since aligning himself more tightly with the ley line this summer. He was himself, but more powerful. Himself, but less human.”
I think I am in love with Adam Parrish! Like seriously, completely and utterly in love!!! <333 This boy is soo damn freaking A.M.A.Z.I.N.G and the Ronan in me just can’t stop to love him!!! XD Adam has become everything I wished him to be!!! He’s so strong now and his powers are growing with each and every single day!!! And it’s not just his powers, it’s the person he’s becoming!! Yes, some of his actions might be considered to be on the dark side, but oh damn this only makes him even more intriguing!!! <333 His sharp mind constantly caused me to swoon and his thoughts… OH GOD, his philosophical thoughts were just epic!!! XD I loved that he was the only one who was smart enough to realise that Gansey is on the list and I was so happy that he finally managed to jump over his own shadow and accepted help!!! And the conversation with his father!??!! ARGH!!! It made me so damn angry!!! I hate and despise this man with a fierce passion and I really hope I will never read anything about him again!!! *growls*
”The students kept coming in. Adam kept watching. He was good at this part, the observing of others. It was himself that he couldn’t seem to study or understand. How he despised them, how he wanted to be them. How pointless to summer in Maine, how much he wanted to do it. How affected he found their speech, how he coveted their lazy monotones. He couldn’t tell how all of these things could be equally true.”
”What an impossible and miraculous and hideous thing this was. An ugly plan hatched by an ugly boy now dreamt into ugly life. From dream to reality. How appropriate it was that Ronan, left to his own devices, manifested beautiful cars and beautiful birds and tenderhearted brothers, while Adam, when given the power, manifested a filthy string of perverse murders.
”Adam was quiet as he weighted the options. His face was strange and delicate in the sharp light of Gansey’s head beam. Swiftly, and without explanation, he reached out to touch the cavern wall. Although he was not a dream thing, he was now one of Cabeswater’s things, and it was hard not to see it in the way his fingers spidered across the wall and in the blackness of his eyes as they gazed at nothing.
Ronan – The Greywaren:
”Ronan was always saying that he never lied, but he wore a liar’s face.”
Another thing that’s become official with this book is the simple fact that Ronan and I must be twins!!! I swear, Ronan is so damn relatable and I just love him for it! XD Deep down within him he has such a tender and lovely heart and I know if he’d read this, he’d probably kill me for saying it out loud! *LOL* It’s still true, Ronan!!! DUH!! ;-P Well, anyway! I really enjoyed seeing that he finally opened up to his friends and there were so many beautiful and affectionate moments that my heart literally combusted whenever I read about him. I know some of my friends got slightly annoyed by the many Ronan updates *cough* Maks *cough* but I just couldn’t help it!!! XD I was really surprised when he took Adam to the Barns and actually admitted that Matthew is one of his dreams and it broke my heart to find out how lonely he truly is. “Lonesome.” it was the word that dominated Adam’s thoughts and I really hope that he won’t be alone anymore!!! <333
To sum it all up: RONAN IS PRECIOUS AF!! *lol* ;-P
The smile widened and sharpened yet more. “It’s not your problem, Gansey.”
He was so much more dangerous when he wasn’t angry. And he was right: Gansey didn’t want to know.
”As always, Adam was reminded of how Ronan belonged in this place. Something about the familiar way he stood as he searched for ripe fruit implied that he had done it many times before. It made it easy to understand that Ronan had grown up here and would grow old here. Easy to see how to exile him was to excise his soul.
Ronan scoffed. Him, fear for his own life. But there was something in his eyes, still. He studied his hands and admitted, “I’ve dreamt him a box of EpiPens. I dream cures for stings all the time. I carry one. I put them in the Pig. I have them all over Monmouth.”
Noah – The Ghost:
”Noah sat in the middle of the floor, papers all around him, a mint plant spilling dirt by his hand. He was all hunched over and shadowless, his form slight and streaky, barely visible at all. He was crying again.
In a very small voice, he told Blue, “You said I could use your energy.”
Noah Czerny is so adorable! That boy has such a wonderful character and it makes me so damn sad that he’s a ghost and dead! I love his cheerful and bouncy nature and I adore how tender and caring he is with the others! Unfortunately there is also a lot of anger and sadness in him and I’m not ashamed to admit that I actually sobbed when he had his breakdown at Monmouth. T_T I just want my baby to be happy, but I can’t see a future for him and it breaks my freaking heart to know that his story most certainly won’t have a happy ending! *weeps*
”Noah reappeared. He plucked four and a half oak leaves out of Blue’s spiky hair and blew some leaf crumbs from the bridge of Adam’s nose.”
” ’A cowards’s heart is no prize, but the man of valor deserves a shining helmet.’ “
I love Mr. Gray!!! His conversations with Blue were so sweet and honest and I really liked how their relationship developed throughout the entire book! <3 Mr. Gray was the perfect father figure and I wonder what will happen in the last book! I mean Artemus finally returned so I guess this will cause quite some trouble between him and Maura. Uh oh! >_<
”In my experience,” the Gray Man said, “the badasses are the most scared. I just avoid being inappropriately frightened.”
Afterward, Piper said, “If we had a puppy, it could pick up those beans for us.”
Greenmantle had replied, “And then we could sacrifice it and use its blood to activate the doll.”
“Will you marry me?” she asked.
Whilst I can’t deny that the Greenmantle’s were pretty entertaining I still want to use this space to point out that they were completely crazy!! *lol* I mean Mr. Gray threatened Piper and they were as cool as if they’d only talk about the weather! They were always so composed and nonchalant and this kind of made them creepy! XD I guess the word I’m searching for is “psychopath”! Yep, that’s it! They were both psychopaths! And truth be told, Piper might have even been the bigger one! *lol*
Ronan & Blue:
”Ronan looked at Blue, eyes narrowed. She didn’t look away.
This was a game she sometimes played with Ronan Lynch: Who would look away first?
It was always a draw.”
Aww! Those two! THOSE TWO! I loved how Ronan consoled Blue when she saw her mother in the lake and the fact he handed her the ghost light even though he knew that he would be alone and in the dark!!! OMG! I think this was one of the most precious moments of the entire book and my heart filled with so much warmth when I read it! <3 I really like that they are finally beginning to trust each other and I can’t wait to see more of their friendship!
”It was amazing that she and Ronan didn’t get along better, because they were different brands of the same impossible stuff.”
”For a moment they remained that way, Ronan holding her as tightly as he would hold his brother Matthew, his cheek on her shoulder.”
Gansey & Adam:
”His noble and oblivious and optimistic friend was slowly opening his eyes and seeing the world for what it was, and it was filthy, and violent, and profane, and unfair. Adam had always thought that was what he wanted – for Gansey to know. But now he wasn’t sure. Gansey wasn’t like anyone else, and suddenly Adam wasn’t sure that he really wanted him to be.”
I was so damn happy that Gansey and Adam actually managed to overcome their troubles! It was awesome to see that their friendship didn’t only survive their problems but also got even stronger than before! The moment when Gansey and Ronan showed up at court immediately caused me to grin like crazy and their gesture made me so happy I almost burst with joy! I loved that they supported him so much and I really don’t want those boys to ever argue again! I’m so glad that Adam finally realised that Gansey is only trying to be his friend!!! <333
”Adam couldn’t remember how they had managed to fight so continuously over the summer. Gansey, his best friend, his stupid and kind and marvelous best friend.”
”Now he could see that it wasn’t charity Gansey was offering. It was just truth. And something else: friendship of the unshakable kind. Friendship you could swear on. That could be busted nearly to breaking and come back stronger than before.”
Gansey & Noah:
”Don’t be afraid,” Noah said unexpectedly. Reaching out, he pulled Gansey’s hand away from his ear. Gansey hadn’t even realized that he was still touching it softly. Leaning forward, Noah blew his cool, corpse breath over Gansey’s ear. “Nothing there. You’re just tired.”
Gansey shivered a little.”
I absolutely adore the relationship of those two boys! They are both gentle souls that try their best to deal with their pain and they seem to understand each other in a way no one else does. Noah knows all of Gansey’s secrets, but he’d never judge him or tell the others. They trust each other completely and even though Noah is a ghost, Gansey always treats him like a normal person! <3 It’s obvious that Noah cares about Gansey and his tender gestures only seem to emphasise his feelings! XD
There was nothing inherently guilty about the moment except that Gansey burned with guilt and thrill and desire and the nebulous feeling of being truly known. It was on the inside of him, and the inside was all Noah ever really paid attention to.
The other boy wore a knowing expression.
”Don’t tell the others,” Gansey said.
“I’m dead,” Noah replied. “Not stupid.”
Gansey & Blue:
”Casually, out of view of Ronan, making sure Adam was still sleeping, Gansey dangled his hand between the driver’s seat and the door. Palm up, fingers stretched back to Blue.”
Their desperate attempts to keep away from each other literally killed me and their nightly phone calls tugged at my heartstrings! There were so many sweet moments between those two but they both know that it can’t end well and it’s hurting them so much that they can’t even seem to be able to breathe whenever they are in each other’s company! JEEZ LOUISE!!! Their love is so bittersweet it’s tearing me apart!!! <3
It was so strange to see him without his Richard Campbell Gansey III guise on in public that Blue couldn’t stop staring at his face. No – it wasn’t his face. It was the way he stood, his shoulders shrugged, chin ducked, gaze from below uncertain eyebrows.
“SHE WAS ALL RIGHT,” Jesse assured him.
“My head knew that,” Gansey said. “But the rest of me didn’t.”
”And then we never speak of it again,” Gansey said, mocking himself softly, and Blue was so glad of it, because she had played the words from that night over and over in her mind and wanted to know he had, too.”
Ronan & Adam aka Ronam:
”Maybe I dreamt you,” he said.
“Thanks for the straight teeth, then,” Adam replied.
RONAN FREAKIN LYNCH COURTED ADAM PARRISH!!! <333 OMG!!! I will never get over this!! I mean Ronan dreamed him a lotion for his hands!! He placed a cassette in his car and named it: “PARRISH’S HONDAYOTA ALONE TIME“ AND it seems like he actually paid him nightly visits in his apartment!!! IN ADAM’S FREAKIN APARTMENT!!! ADFSJKLMNÖ!!! Oh my!!! I’m combusting! <333 There were so many awesome Ronam moments in this book and I can’t even explain how happy they made me! *lol* I loved how smug Ronan was about Adam being the magician and my heart melted when he tried to console him when Persephone died!!! Oh and when they blackmailed Greenmantle!? So, so perfect, so epic!!! They are such an awesome TEAM!!! <3 I CAN’T EVEN!!! *dies of excitement*
”As they moved through the old barn, Adam felt Ronan’s eyes glance off him and away, his disinterest practiced but incomplete. Adam wondered if anyone else noticed.”
He admitted, “Some.”
“A lot,” Ronan translated, and he was right, because, strangely enough, Ronan knew a great deal about how Adam worked.
”Adam and Ronan regarded each other, and then the pit. They looked winsome and brave, trusting of Cabeswater or of each other. They did not look afraid, so Blue was afraid for them.”
The conclusion :
Maggie Stiefvater is a poet and a genius!!! I can’t wait to read “The Raven King” and I don’t even dare to say it, but I think I loved this book even more than I loved “The Dream Thieves”! *lol* When it comes to Maggie’s “The Raven Cycle” books there actually seems to be no limit, they only get better and better! <3
“Once I send the professor off, one of you guys can get into the front. Adam? Unless he’s sleeping.”
“No,” Adam said. „I’m awake.“
Notes are private!
Nov 19, 2017
Dec 16, 2017
Nov 19, 2017
Mar 27, 2007
Apr 01, 2008
it was amazing
”Words are pale shadows of forgotten names. As names have power, words have power. Words can light fires in the minds of men. Words can wring tears fr ”Words are pale shadows of forgotten names. As names have power, words have power. Words can light fires in the minds of men. Words can wring tears from the hardest hearts. There are seven words that will make a person love you. There are ten words that will break a strong man's will. But a word is nothing but a painting of a fire. A name is the fire itself.”
Okay, there are books
then there are BOOKS!!!
I guess this said it actually doesn’t take a lot to figure that “The Name of the Wind” definitely was one of those books that falls into the latter category. ;-)
This was such a wonderful and perfect read!!! So compelling and lovely!!!
It captivated me from the very first page and with each and every single line it grew even more on me. I fell in love with this masterpiece and I swear I love it so much now that I didn’t even want to return it to the library.
Every fibre of my being ached at the mere thought of giving it back and the reluctance I felt when I handed it back to the librarian was almost overwhelming. >_<
Needless to say, I had to give it back though. =((
Also needless to say, I immediately went to amazon and bought myself my own copy! *LOL*
So yeah, I finally broke my book buying ban but seriously, I need to possess this book! I guess I’ll just pass it off as a birthday present to myself! ;-P Really, I had no other choice than to buy it, my life definitely wouldn’t be complete without this book in my shelf. XD
Yes, it’s that dramatic!!!
If you ever read it you’ll hopefully understand what I mean! *lol*
I’m sure by now you all wonder what made this book so special for me and I decided to break my usual review routine to give you the answers you’re searching for. Yes, you read right. Plural! Answers! Because there are so many damn good reasons to read this book I just can’t name only one. XD
So here we go! Let’s find out how many reasons I’m able to come up with! *lol* I’m pretty curious myself. ;-)
1.) The marvellous and brilliant execution of the narration! We have two different time and story lines and the way they are interwoven with each other is just amazing!!! One plotline deals with Kvothe’s youth and his time at the University while the other one describes his current life. Patrick you get kudos for pulling this off so nicely!!! ;-P
2.) The endless wisdom of this book. Everyone who knows me knows I’m a sucker for quotes and oh boy did this book deliver!!! <333 I. AM. COMPLETELY. AND. UTTERLY. IN. LOVE. with Patrick’s wisdom and his unique way with words!!! I’m so besotted with it, it’s almost scary!
”Etiquette is a set of rules people use so they can be rude to each other in public."
”Nothing but the truth could break me. What is harder than the truth?”
”You’re clever. We both know that. But you can be thoughtless. A clever, thoughtless person is one of the most terrifying things there is.”
”We understand how dangerous a mask can be. We all become what we pretend to be.”
3.) The magic system! I loved the idea and how it was described. You need a lot of basic and deeper knowledge to be able to do “magic” in this book and I think it’s fascinating how everything is connected somehow. Alone the use of Sympathy was already so complex it was almost a whole science of its own and I really have no idea how they were even able to do something like that. I might have gotten accepted into Hogwarts, but I’m fairly certain I’d have never made it into the University! *LOL*
4.) The way music and stories are such an integral part of “The Name of the Wind”. Is Patrick a musician himself? I can’t help but wonder, because he sooo nailed our representation!!! I swear I never felt so understood! It’s like he knows what moves us and what makes us tick! Just wonderful!!! <333 (view spoiler)[I always died a slow death whenever someone broke Kvothe’s lute. T_T At first the one from his father and then the one he bought in the shop. Gosh, it was always so painful when he was robbed of his music! My heart bled so much for him and it quite literally hurt my artistic soul!! Urgh! Pat can we keep from crushing music instruments in the next book? Please!? *making huge puppy eyes* (hide spoiler)]
”You have to be a bit of a liar to tell a story the right way. Too much truth confuses the facts. Too much honesty makes you sound insincere."
”Asking to hold a musician's instrument is roughly similar to asking to kiss a man's wife. Nonmusicians don't understand. An instrument is like a companion and a lover."
”I headed back to the University with money in my purse and the comforting weight of the lute strap hanging from my shoulder. It was secondhand, ugly, and had cost me dearly in money, blood, and peace of mind.
I loved it like a child, like breathing, like my own right hand.”
5.) I’m all about interesting side characters and to say there were plenty of them would most definitely be an understatement! From Trapis to Auri and Sim & Wilem to the staff of the Eolian or Devi! They were all so damn intriguing!!! I want to see more of them and I want to know their backstories and how they ended up doing what they do!!! XD
6.) Kvothe’s unwavering dedication to knowledge and books! And his so very very relatable curiosity!! *lol* I swear there was more than one moment I was like: DAMN THIS IS SO ME!! XD PLUS the ARCANUM!!! Who wouldn’t be in love with such a place?!! *sighs dreamily*
"It probably shows a perverse element of my personality that even though I was finally inside the Archives, surrounded by endless secrets, that I was drawn to the one locked door I had found. Perhaps it is human nature to seek out hidden things. Perhaps it is simply my nature."
7.) The captivating world building and engrossing depiction. Everything felt so realistic and plausible and even though the book had no epic fight scenes and no heavy drama it was still so very suspenseful and moving. Patrick Rothfuss is such a talented storyteller and there was never a dull moment throughout the entire book! It was such a delight to read his words and I respect the hell out of this man!!! <3
8.) Last but not least: The main characters!
This is the moment I warn you about the spoilers in my review! There will be plenty of them and if you don’t want to read them you better leave this page without scrolling down. Don’t say I didn’t warn you! XD
To make a point I’m even giving you the chance to leave…
“I am a myth,” Kote said easily, making an extravagant gesture. “A very special kind of myth that creates itself. The best lies about me are the ones I told.”
Kvothe, Kvothe, oh Kvothe!!! Why did no one warn me about this wonderful and broken boy? There are so many things that make him my kryptonite; it’s not even funny anymore. *lol* He has red hair and green eyes! Oh my, I’m such a sucker for red-heads! Haha! And the sass!!! Oh boy, I love his sass and his mouth and everything he says and does!!! If he’d been a real man I’d be swooning whenever I see him. I swear! XD He’s the right mixture of everything! Funny, sassy af!!! (scratch that he’s the King of Sass!), intelligent, not black nor white if anything he’s completely grey!, calculating, stubborn, arrogant and so very very broken on the inside. In short: I was a goner the moment he was mentioned! *lol* I can’t help but love this boy, I mean he learned a language in a day and a half, he held a lecture in front of his class because Master Hemme dared him to!!! and he succeeded which unfortunately only gained him a whipping! (Damn Master Hemme, I hate him!!) Jeez! Kvothe always acted so strong but deep down within him he was such a broken thing. It broke my heart when his parents died and the years he lived at the streets of Tarbean only shattered it even more. I hate it that everyone only seems to want to hurt him and whenever something good happened, something bad immediately followed on its feet. URGH!!! My poor Kvothe, his struggle with his poverty was so heart-breaking and I hate Ambrose for everything he did! I hate him with a fierce passion; I genuinely hope he goes to hell!!! I really don’t know if I’m ready to see Kvothe suffer even more but considering his current condition, it’s clear that something bad must have happened to cause him to lead an inn. *sigh* I’m almost afraid to read the next book. *lol* Pat can you please not hurt him?! No? Okay, I’ll read your book anyway. Haha!
"I jerked away from her, almost falling. "No!" I meant to shout but it came out as a weak croak, "Don't touch me." My voice was shaking, though I couldn't tell if I was angry or afraid. I staggered away against the wall. My voice was blurry in my ears. “I’ll be fine.”
I gave him a hard look. “If I pass out you may do whatever you wish.” I said firmly. “Until then, I will not be tied.”
“People probably are distracted by your hair. It’s so bright. It’s pretty. … Pretty distracting. And your face is really expressive. You’re always in control of it, even the way your eyes behave. But not the color.” She gave a faint smile. “They’re pale now. Like green frost. You must be terribly afraid.”
"I needed to let them know they couldn't hurt me. I've learned that the best way to stay safe is to make your enemies think you can't be hurt." It sounded ugly to say it so starkly, but it was the truth. I looked at him defiantly.
”Kote looked up, and for a second Chronicler saw past the anger that lay glittering on the surface of his eyes. For a moment he saw the pain underneath, raw and bloody, like a wound too deep for healing.”
”No matter where she stood, she was in the center of the room.” Kvothe frowned. “Do not misunderstand. She was not loud, or vain. We stare at a fire because it flickers, because it glows. The light is what catches our eyes, but what makes a man lean close to a fire has nothing to do with its bright shape. What draws you to a fire is the warmth you feel when you come near. The same was true of Denna.”
To be entirely honest, I still don’t know how I feel about her. At first I was afraid she might only play with Kvothe and I guess to some extent she did, but the more I got to know her, the more I realised that she can’t really help it. She obviously likes him a lot but there are so many things that make it impossible to have a relationship with him and she constantly seems to be drawn to other men. Men that have more money than him, men that can provide for her. It would be too easy to say that she could stop it to be with him, because let’s be realistic and face it, they both would end up living on the streets. My initial distrust for Denna definitely turned into pity the longer the story continued and I really hope she’ll find a rich sponsor soon. Her life seems to be tough and I really want to know what happened to hurt her so much. I hope the next book will answer this question.
”There were tears once or twice. But they were not for the men she had lost or the men she had left. They were quiet tears for herself, because there was something inside her that was badly hurt. I couldn’t tell what it was and didn’t dare to ask. Instead I simply said what I could to take the pain away and helped her shut her eyes against the world.
”And I swear by the night sky and the ever-moving moon: if you lead my master to despair, I will slit you open and splash around like a child in a muddy puddle. I’ll string a fiddle with your guts and make you play it while I dance.”
Haha! Yeah, Bast definitely is Kvothe’s student. *lol* I love that guy! He’s not an all too huge part of the book and only appears in the time line when Kvothe tells Chronicler about his past but it’s obvious that he cares about his master deeply. There seems to be a dark side to Bast but everyone who knows me, also knows that this only makes him even more appealing to me. ;-P I want to find out how they both got to know each other and how it is possible that Kvothe who’s so much younger than Bast ended up being his master. *lol* Bast has a special place in my heart and I can’t wait to find out more about what truly “moves him”. ;-P
”You are not wise enough to fear me as I should be feared. You do not know the first note of the music that moves me.”
The question seemed to catch Bast unprepared. He stood still and awkward for a moment, all his fluid grace gone. For a moment it looked as if he might burst into tears. “What do I want? I just want my Reshi back.” His voice was quiet and lost. “I want him back the way he was.”
Soo that were eight reasons.
Are you already convinced or do you still need another one?!
9.) There aren’t many books I’d take and throw at a person with the words “READ IT!! READ IT NOW!!!!” but “The Name of the Wind” definitely is one of those rare books! It’s one of those BOOKS!!! So read it!! Read it now!! *lol*
“The Name of the Wind” is a masterpiece and Patrick Rothfuss is a freaking genius! Don’t let the 722 pages keep you from reading this awesome book because if you like amazing tales with a lot of details and intriguing characters this definitely will give you everything you’ve been craving for! XD
I highly recommend you to read this book and once you’ve actually managed to open it, the pages turn so fast someone might even consider it to be…. Well, dare I say it?
Notes are private!
Jan 15, 2018
Feb 10, 2018
Nov 07, 2017
Mass Market Paperback
Sep 17, 2013
Sep 30, 2014
it was amazing
”All of us have secrets in our lives. We’re keepers or kept-from, players or played. Secrets and cockroaches – that’s what will be left at the end of ”All of us have secrets in our lives. We’re keepers or kept-from, players or played. Secrets and cockroaches – that’s what will be left at the end of it all.”
Oh god what can I say about this book?
I loved it!!!
I loved it with all my heart and even though I never wanted it to end I still wanted to know what would happen next! XD
Seriously, there is something about the way Maggie Stiefvater describes her world, how she expresses the countless feelings of her characters. With Maggie things are never perfunctory. They are deep, deep like a well or an ancient ocean! Her words drag you into the water; they carry you out into the raging sea!
Every gesture, every single moment, every sentence, they all have some meaning and if you’re perceptive enough you can read between the lines. I adore her writing style and I just can’t seem to get enough of her characters!
They’re all special in their own way and every one of them is just so tangible and real! I felt like I was part of her story, like I knew those boys and their troubles and thoughts.
I can’t seem to be able to describe what Maggie’s books do to me, all I can say is that they are magical and credible and always force me to feel!!! And oh boy, how they force me to feel!!! XD
To read “The Dream Thieves” was incredible and I don’t know if it’s even possible, but I think I love all those different boys even more than I did before!!! <333
”Ronan Lynch, keeper of secrets, fighter of men, devil of a boy, had told them all that he could take objects out of his dreams.”
Well, I guess that quote already explains it all! The second book of the Raven Cycle is dealing with Ronan Lynch’s ability to take things from dreams and if you know Ronan, you also know that he has many secrets and isn’t as tough as he comes across! XD Still, even though the main focus lies on Ronan and his family, the other characters play a huge part in the book as well! So don’t worry, there’s still a lot to read about the other precious Aglionby Boys and Blue! ;-P
”But the boys were not looking at the scenery. They stood in a close circle: Adam Parrish, gaunt and fair, Noah Czerny, smudgy and slouching; and Ronan Lynch, ferocious and dark.”
Here we go with my typical spoiler warning! From now on you’ll find yourself bombarded with spoilers and quotes! So beware and tread carefully!!!
”She would see a rich boy dressed like a mannequin and coiffed like a newscaster – but his eyes were like the dreaming pool in Cabeswater. He hid the insatiable wanting well, but now that she’d seen it once, she couldn’t stop seeing it.”
Richard Gansey the III, the golden boy who seems to have everything but is so lonely that it hurts! Oh boy did I feel sorry for him throughout the entire book! He always tried to fix everything and his friends are like brothers to him, yet he’s never able to tell them how he truly feels. It was so frustrating to watch him, to see how he struggled and couldn’t put his thoughts into words! Gansey is such a delicate soul but for some reason no one seems to get him. T_T He would do everything for his boys and I think he proved that more than once; as it seems they all have their problems to accept his help though. Still, I liked that we finally saw some other parts of Gansey’s personality as well! For instance his wild side and how he became friends with Adam! XD I love Gansey but he’s so lonesome and driven by his need to find Glendower that it’s sometimes almost painful to read his POV! >_<
”Once, he had dreamt that he found Glendower. It wasn’t the actual finding, but the day after. He wouldn’t forget the sensation of the dream. It hadn’t been joy, but instead, the absence of pain. He couldn’t forget that lightness. The freedom.
”There were many versions of Gansey, but this one had been rare since the introduction of Adam’s taming presence. It was also Ronan’s favourite. It was the opposite of Gansey’s most public face, which was pure control enclosed in a paper-thin wrapper of academia.”
”Blue was a fanciful but sensible thing, like a platypus, or one of those sandwiches that had been cut into circles for a fancy tea party.”
I still like Blue but there were some things that caused me to be annoyed at her. For instance the fact that she didn’t want to tell Adam why she would never kiss him. I mean, I understand her reasons to keep it from him, but I think she could have chosen her words a little more carefully. I know Adam kind of drove her into a corner, I’m pretty certain that he would have understood it if she would have told him sooner though! But then again she is young and inexperienced and has no idea how to deal with boys so I guess this kind of works in her favor. *lol* Still, this was already the second book and I still have the feeling that I don’t know her! I really hope this is going to change in the next book!!!
Blue put a hand on his chest and pressed. “I don’t want to kiss you. It’s not going to be you and me.”
”As always, his features intrigued Blue. They were not quite conventionally handsome, but they were interesting. He had the typical Henrietta prominent cheekbones and deep-set eyes, but his version of them was more delicate. It made him seem a little alien. A little impenetrable.”
Adam Parrish destroyed me!!! This boy broke my heart in so many different ways I can’t even count it anymore. My heart ached and bled for him!!! It was devastating to watch his decline!!! And oh god, that moment when he ran away and didn’t even remember Gansey’s phone number?!! I can’t even!!! It killed me to see him like that, to know that he was so broken and couldn’t seem to be able to fix it!! Hell, even Adam knew it!!! He was completely aware of his degeneration and that made it even harder to bear!!! I was so glad that Persephone helped him to find himself and encouraged him to make peace with Cabeswater! Their relationship was amazing and to know that Adam finally found his way and became “The Magician” filled me with joy!!!! =))) I bet he’s going to be powerful in the future and I can’t wait to see it happening!!! XD
”It was nothing, but it was Adam Parrish’s nothing. How he hated and loved it. How proud he was of it, how wretched it was.”
”Do you think you’re a train wreck?”
“That would mean I was on the tracks to start with,” he replied.
”He would be Cabeswater’s hands and Cabeswater’s eyes, but he wouldn’t be Cabeswater.
He would be Adam Parrish.”
”And Ronan was everything that was left: molten eyes and a smile made for war.”
Ronan Lynch is my precious boy!!! I love him to bits and pieces!!! The fact this book was about him and his family made me so happy and to read his POV was just amazing!! I love that he’s a walking and talking oxymoron and even though he seems to be so tough he’s actually a softie on the inside! *lol* AND OMG!!! I knew it!!!! I knew he was gay and had feelings for ADAM!!! YASSSS!!! There were so many hints in this book and the conversations with Kavinsky definitely helped to figure it out! We finally got to see the real Ronan and I’m thankful for every second of it. He cares about his family deeply (well everyone except of Declan of course ;-P) and to find out about his nightmares was more than just a revelation. I mean the fact Ronan tried to kill himself never set well with me and I couldn’t imagine him to commit suicide. So to find out that it had been the monsters of his dreams was kind of relieving but also disturbing. *lol* Also I’m pretty certain that Declan and him are at odds because he’s gay. There’s no palpable proof yet, but I think I read it between the lines! ;-P
”His gaze followed his brother’s leg to where it rested on top of Adam’s and his expression tightened.”
”Don’t fucking swear,” Ronan said.
”That’s not what Gansey is to me,” Ronan said.
“You didn’t say you don’t swing that way.”
Ronan was silent. Thunder growled under his feet. “No. I didn’t.”
”The last six minutes, the ones that took place after Noah had first fallen but before he actually died, were excruciating. Blue considered herself a fairly steadfast, sensible girl, but no matter how many times she heard his torn-up breath seizing in his throat, she felt a little teary.”
I really wish we would have seen more of Noah, but since he’s connected to the ley line and Kavinsky and Ronan made it a habit to mess with it through the entire book, there really wasn’t any chance to get to know him better. Still, I love this boy and the kiss between him and Blue was so bittersweet!! It broke my heart into tiny little pieces and I think I’ll remember this moment forever! Oh god, how I wish that Noah could be happy! That he’d find someone who loves him and accepts him the way he is! As a wonderful and lovable ghost that never got a chance to live!!! Maggie please let him be happy in the next two books!!! Because my heart bleeds for this amazing boy and I couldn’t take it if he’d be unhappy for the rest of his undead life!!! T_T
”I know somebody you could kiss.”
“Who?” She realized his eyes were amused. “Oh, wait.”
He shrugged. He was maybe the only person Blue knew who could preserve the integrity of a shrug while lying down.”
”I’d ask you out, if I was alive.”
Nothing was fair.
“I’d say okay,” she replied.
She only had time to see him smile faintly. And then he was gone.
Ronan replied, “Not such a thief tonight.”
“Some nights,” Kavinsky said, all teeth, “you just take it. Consent is overrated.”
He’s such a numpty but I still liked him somehow? I don’t know! XD There was something about him that made him really intriguing and even though I knew that he was bad I still had the irrational hope that he would be able to change for the better. It was so obvious that he was unhappy with his life and would have needed some help, yet I’m still sure that he would have never accepted it. He definitely was gay and he SOOO had the hots for Ronan!!! *lol* His death might have been unnecessary but it certainly wasn’t unexpected… RIP Joseph Kavinsky! >_<
”After a moment, he heard the hood groan as Kavinsky leaned over him. Then he felt the ridged callus of a finger drag slowly over the skin on his back. A slow arc between his shoulder blades, drawing the pattern of his tattoo. Then sliding down his spine, tensing every muscle it moved over.”
”The world’s a nightmare.”
The Gray Man:
”The king of swords, master of his own emotions, master of his own intellect, master of reason, gazed out at them, expression inscrutable.”
Ha! That man gave me anxiety!!! *lol* I was so worried that he’d hurt Ronan and after the scene with Declan I actually feared for Ronan’s life!!! But then the Gray Man met Maura and everything changed! XD The chapters from his POV were really interesting and I liked the idea of him being a hit man! ;-) He was a great addition to the cast and I can’t wait to see more of him and Maura! Because truth be told, they actually were cute as hell!! *grins like a Cheshire cat*
”I’m sorry no one saved you.”
Was he unsaved? Would he have ever ended up any other way?”
Maura kissed the back of his hand. “You’re going to have to be brave.”
The Gray Man said, “I’m always brave.”
She said, “Braver than that.”
Adam & Gansey
”If Adam was stupid about his pride, Gansey was stupid about Adam.”
I hated that they quarrelled so often but I loved it when Gansey spoke with his friend Malory and made Adam laugh!!! Their friendship was really tense in this book, but I think it was good this way. They had to work things out and realise where they were standing and without conflict they would have never even gotten that far! Sometimes it needs friction to find out who you are and to say there was a lot of it between Adam and Gansey certainly would be the understatement of the century. *lol*
”He hated the careful way Gansey had asked him about it. Tiptoeing, just like Adam had learned to tiptoe around his father.
”Gansey couldn’t shake the image of Adam by the side of the interstate, walking, walking, walking. Knowing he was forgetting what he was doing, but unable to stop. Unable to remember Gansey’s number, even when people did stop to help.”
Ronan & Noah
”Adam thinks he saw an apparition at his place.”
Ronan eyed Noah. “I’m seeing an apparition right now.”
Those two were hilarious!!! *LOL* I loved it when Ronan threw Noah out of the window!!! They have such a close relationship and it’s awesome that Ronan treats Noah like he would treat any other boy! (Well, except of throwing him out of the window of course! XD) Noah knows about Ronan’s feelings for Adam but he respects Ronan’s wishes and that’s amazing!!! <333 He’s a really good friend and I hope I’ll see more of their interactions in the next book! =)))
”Noah,” Ronan said tenderly, placing his palm on top of Noah’s cold, seven-years-dead hand, “you’re starting to piss me off.”
Ronan & Gansey:
”There was never a time when that could’ve been you and me. You know the difference between us and Kavinsky? We matter.”
Love those two boys! I think it’s kind of funny that Ronan thinks Adam tamed Gansey, because it’s actually what Gansey is doing with him! *lol* Gansey is the voice of reason and they complement each other so perfectly it’s kind of beautiful to watch! ;-)
”His face went somber for half a second, and then it dissolved into an absolutely wonderful and fearless laugh. The old Ronan Lynch’s laugh. No, it was better than that one, because this new one had just a hint of darkness beneath it. This Ronan knew there was crap in the world, but he was laughing anyway.”
Gansey & Blue :
”In some parallel universe, there was a Gansey who could tell Blue that he found the ten inches of her bare calves far more tantalizing than the thirteen cubic feet of bare skin Orla sported.”
It's somehow amusing that Gansey sees Blue as a glorious and fearless animal! Haha! But then again that’s just Gansey’s typical way to describe the people around him! XD I loved their telephone conversations and their easy banter!!! And I was happy that they called each other whenever they felt troubled and alone! PLUS that almost kiss between them GAVE ME LIFE!!!! <333 Oh my, how my heart skipped a beat when I read that scene!!! XD
”He pressed his eyes closed. Just the sound of her voice, the Henrietta lull to it, made him feel uneven and shattered.”
”Ha! Adam’s communing with trees and Noah keeps re-enacting being murdered and Ronan’s wrecking and then making me new cars. What’s new with you? Something terrible, I trust?”
”He leaned towards her – her heart spun again – and pressed his cheeks against hers. His lips didn’t touch her skin, but she felt his breath, hot and uneven, on her face. His fingers splayed on either side of her spine. Her lips were so close to his jaw that she felt his hint of stubble at the end of them. It was mint and memories and the past and the future and she felt as if she’d done this before and already she longed to do it again.”
Ronan & Adam aka Ronam!!! (I know the official ship name is Pynch but for me they’ll always be Ronam! <333):
”Ronan sometimes dreamt of Adam, too, the latter boy sullen and elegant and fluently disdainful of dream-Ronan’s clumsy attempts to communicate.”
I still want to know how Ronan tried to communicate!!! *LOOOL* All those little moments between those two gave me SO MUCH LIFE!!! They still kept their distance and didn’t say anything, but oh boy what they thought and how they acted around each other!!!! By the end of the book I was nothing but a babbling mess and the epilogue literally killed me!!!! OH GOD!!! I’M STILL NOT OVER IT!!! I knew Adam was Ronan’s second secret and I WANT to see more of them!!! Their interactions at the Barns were so explicit! That moment with the mask and when Adam said that he couldn’t kill Ronan’s demons! They know each other’s soul and they are just meant to be together!!! Knowing Maggie this love is going to be a slow burn though and I really don’t know if my tortured and tormented soul will be able to take it! XD
”And he was the boy with the most beautifully interesting car and the most savagely handsome of friends, Ronan Lynch.”
”The mask clattered to the floor. Adam, startled, stared at where Ronan’s hand gripped his wrist. Ronan could feel his own heart pounding and, in Adam’s wrist, Adam’s.”
”Adam looked up at Ronan. “I know it was you,” he said. “I figured it out. The rent.”
He held Ronan’s gaze for just a moment longer, until something inside Ronan unwound and he almost said something.
”Ronan’s second secret was Adam Parrish. Adam was different since making the bargain with Cabeswater. Stronger, stranger, farther away. It was hard not to stare at the odd and elegant lines of his face.”
The bottom line:
THIS BOOK WAS INCREDIBLE!!!! I loved it even more than “The Raven Boys” and if it would be possible to give more than five stars I wouldn’t even hesitate to do it!!!
Maggie Stiefvater knows exactly what she’s doing and to say she’s doing it perfectly wouldn’t even get close to the truth! ;-)
P.S: This was a buddy read with the amazing Lior!!! Seriously, I probably wouldn’t have survived to read this book if I wouldn’t have been able to fangirl with you!!! <333 ...more
Notes are private!
Oct 22, 2017
Nov 14, 2017
Oct 22, 2017
Sep 12, 2017
Sep 12, 2017
it was amazing
”This is how we reveal ourselves: these tiny flashes of discomfort, the reactions we can’t hide.”
“Autoboyography” was one of those books I wanted to r ”This is how we reveal ourselves: these tiny flashes of discomfort, the reactions we can’t hide.”
“Autoboyography” was one of those books I wanted to read ever since I read the blurb. I mean there was the mention of a bisexual character that’s forced to stay in the closet because he moved to Utha and truth be told that alone was already enough to pique my interest! *lol*
Still, when I picked up the book I didn’t expect to go through so many feels and to say it touched my heart is certainly putting it mildly! I was so worried for those two boys and their feelings and thoughts left me so raw and broken.
There were scenes that made me laugh and another few pages in I’d suddenly feel angry and frustrated, just to burst into tears as soon as I turned the next page! ARGH!! It’s almost impossible to describe what I felt while I read this book.
Once I began to really read it, I couldn’t put it down anymore though. I felt a need to know how it would continue and if something bad would happen and that aforementioned need almost killed me and made me nervous as hell! XD
I swear there were moments when I bit my nails, snorted in disbelief or nervously began to chew my bottom lip. Yes, “Autoboyography” really put me on edge!!! (And it once again was a book that earned me one of my husbands disapproving looks. *lol*)
I can’t even put into words how much I actually dreaded the end!!! For me the foreboding and anticipation was almost unbearable, it was really intense… and when I finally reached the ending….
Oh well I guess you’ll just have to read the book! ;-P *lol*
(I know I’m mean, you can thank me later. XD)
”As he faces the class from the front now, his eyes flash when they meet mine – for a tiny flicker of a second, and then again, like a prism catching light, because he does a double take.”
Tanner Scott is a bisexual boy who had been out in California but was kind of forced back into the closet when his mother got a job offer in Utha. Three years ago their entire family moved into Mormon territory and all this time Tann never outed himself, mostly because there actually was no need to. His plan was to make it into an out-of-state college and to never look back, but as plans go this one turned out to be more difficult than he had initially anticipated. To finish school and to get a good grade in Mr. Fujita’s class might be impossible, especially because everything Tanner can think about is Sebastian Brother, the bishop’s son who’s supposed to help him write a story but somehow ended up stealing his heart instead.
Spoiler warning!!! If you don’t want to be spoiled you better stop now! XD Proceed at your own risk! ;-)
”Kissing boys feels good. Kissing girls feels good. But something tells me kissing Sebastian would be like a sparkler falling in the middle of a field of dry grass.”
”I was in the neighborhood.” I take a bite, chewing, swallowing through my smile. “Came over to campus to dance and sing some songs.”
His eyes twinkle. He doesn’t seem to mind that I’m not LDS, let alone mocking it a little. “Cool.”
I just loved and adored Tanner!!! This boy was so honest and straightforward and his humour was just amazing! *lol* I swear everyone needs a Tanner in their life!!! XD I really liked how he tried to understand Sebastian’s beliefs and didn’t judge him for it! And I also appreciated that he stayed true to himself! He never let others influence his decisions and I think it needs a lot of inner strength to follow your own path and to accept that you need to make your own mistakes, especially if you have so nice and caring parents like Tanner had. *lol* Still, when he told Sebastian that he loves him and didn’t even get a proper reaction from him, my heart just hurt!!! It was so painful to watch them break up and I swear, no matter what I did, I really couldn’t stop to worry about him! XD
He wants to go on a mission? He wants to leave here and commit two of his best, hottest, wildest, most adventurous years to the church? He wants to give his life to this – really give his life?
I stare at my hands and wonder what the hell I’m actually doing here. Glitter-heart Paige has nothing on me. I am the King of Naïve.”
”You know Mom would murder you for that, for your semi-unintentional blessing that I deflower the bishop’s son.”
”I don’t actually care if you break my heart, Sebastian. I went into this knowing it could happen and I gave it to you anyway. But I don’t want you to break your own. You have so much space in your heart for your church, but does it have space for you?”
”I went to a movie by myself and ate an entire box of Red Vines.” He leans in, eyes full of that teasing shine. “I had a Coke.”
My brain is tangled: Cannot compute. Which emotion to drop into the bloodstream? Fondness or bewilderment? For the love of God, this is Sebastian at his naughtiest.
Sebastian Brother broke my freaking heart!!! OH GOD, I CAN’T EVEN!!! This boy… this wonderful, precious, amazing, righteous, brilliant and lovable boy!!! ARGH!!! He was almost too good to be true and all I wanted to do was to give him a big hug, wrap him in a blanket and tell him that everything would be alright!! I hated to see his struggle, to read how he thought that something was wrong with him just because he’s gay! It made me sooo damn sad to know that his parents would never accept him the way he is and it almost physically hurt to see his pain!!! T_T He tried so hard to please his parents, to be the way they wanted him to be, but this made him so unhappy it was hard to watch… And that moment when he signed the book for Tanner? It was so damn heart-breaking!!! *sobs*
”I’m not even attracted to girls. I envy you that. I keep praying I will be at some point.” He puffs out a breath. “I’ve never said that out loud.” When he blinks, the tears slide down his cheeks. Sebastian tilts his face up, looking at the clouds and letting out a sad laugh. “I can’t tell if this feels good or terrible.”
”I mean,” he says, flustered, trying again. “I’m attracted to guys, and I’m with you right now, but I’m not gay. That’s a different choice, and I’m not choosing that path.”
”We’re supposed to pray, and listen – so I do. But then, when I turn to others, it’s like…” He shakes his head. “It feels like I’m pushing through the dark and I know what’s ahead is safe, but no one is following me there.”
”Being gay isn’t wrong, but it’s not God’s plan either.” He shakes his head, and I think this moment, right here, is when it really hits me that Sebastian’s identity isn’t queer. It’s not gay. It’s not even soccer player or boyfriend or son.
”Sometimes I get the weird feeling that I wouldn’t be enough for you. I love you, but only a little.”
I think Autumn was a really good friend, not just for Tanner but also for Sebastian and this even though she barely even knew him. I liked the easy banter between her and Tanner and they gave me the impression that they were really good and close friends. Sure, Autumn had her flaws and I wasn’t always happy about the way she dealt with things, for some incomprehensible reason this only made her human and relatable though. *lol*
”They’re upset, but at some point they’ll figure out you can be right, or you can be loved. Only a handful get both at the same time.”
”I’ve always liked whoever,” I tell him. “I really am bi. It’s about the person, not the parts, I guess.”
I LOVED the bi-representation in this book! For me it was spot on!!! Yes, I know a lot of people will disagree and say that it only pointed out the prejudices and kind of reinforced them by giving them space, but the bitter truth is that we actually have to deal with them each and every single day!!! They don’t vanish just because we don’t mention them! I totally agree with Tanner when he says that it’s nothing you get to choose! To be bisexual means to be attracted to both sexes and if you’re a bisexual girl and end up with a boy this doesn’t automatically make you straight! Same goes for being with a girl, just because you fall in love with a girl you’re not a lesbian! AND yes you can be faithful to your partner and still think that Milla Jovovich and Eva Green are damn hot! (which they actually are!!! *lol*) Oh well, *cough* back to the review! XD
”Why wouldn’t you just be with a girl, then?” he asks quietly. “If you were attracted to them? Wouldn’t it be so much easier?"
“That’s not something you get to choose.”
The Mormon/LDS representation:
”It’s completely different. Among a hundred other reasons, going to church is a choice. Being bisexual is simply who you are. I’m protecting you from the toxic messages of the church.”
I actually laugh at this. “And his parents are doing it to protect him from hell.”
I can’t say an awful lot about the LDS representation because I actually don’t know anything about it. So in some way this book was even kind of educational. *lol* I think I understand their beliefs and I got what they are talking about, but I guess I’ll never be able to truly fathom why religion is so important to so many people. I think I’m a lot like Tanner when it comes to that. I was raised a Roman-Catholic but I’m neither an active part of the church nor do I go to mass and I guess the reasons for that are pretty obvious. ;-)
”I assume his family doesn’t know he’s gay?”
“I don’t even know if he’s gay.”
“Well for argument’s sake, let’s assume he is and your feelings are reciprocated. You know the church thinks it’s okay to have same-sex attraction but you aren’t allowed to act on it?”
“Yeah, I know.”
“Would you be able to be with him without touching him?”
”I’ve never had someone over before who wasn’t a member,” he says. The mind reader. “I’m just watching you take it all in.”
I decide to go for pure honesty: “It’s hard to understand.”
Tanner’s slip with Autumn:
I think it wasn’t necessary for the plot but then again things like that just happen. I know some people will say that Tanner was acting irresponsible and shouldn’t have slept with Autumn especially because she was still a virgin, but please keep in mind that she said she wanted him to be her first!!! He didn’t take advantage of her! He was broken and sad and completely devastated and yes, he might have known that Autumn had a crush on him, but let’s face the truth: Autumn also knew that he was heartbroken and completely vulnerable when she slept with him!!! If anything they both took advantage of each other and their understanding was mutual! They made that mistake together and in the end they dealt with it like adults. ;-)
Mom can’t help herself. “Does he know about you?”
“About how I turn into a troll at sunset?” I shake my head. “I don’t think so.”
“Tanner,” she says gently. “You know what I mean.”
I do. Unfortunately. “Please calm down. It’s not like I have a tail.”
“Honey,” Mom starts, horrified.
Can I just say that I adored his family!?!? They were so awesome and supportive!!! Seriously, I really wish everyone would have parents like that! Yes, Tanner’s mom could be annoying with her bumper stickers and her reservations about Sebastian, but she was just worried about her son and that’s the most important thing!!! She just wanted him to be happy and accepted him the way he is!! Oh and the conversations with his dad?! I LOVED THEM!!! They were priceless!!! <333 Seriously, Tanner’s dad was so wise!! XD
“My parents know I’ve had crushes on guys before, but it’s never been a reality like this. Now there’s a guy, with a name and a phone. We’ve all been so cool about it, but I realize, sitting here at this silent dinner table, that there are layers to their acceptance.”
”He tucks a finger under my chin, lifting my face to his. “Are you willing to be a secret? Maybe you are for now. But this is your life, and it will stretch out before you, and you are the only person who can make it whatever you want it to be.”
She claps a hand over her mouth when she sees Sebastian, and tears rise to the surface of her eyes nearly immediately. Mom pull us up, hugs me, and then wordlessly takes Sebastian into her arms – he gets the longer hug, the one with the soft Mom words spoken into his ear – and something breaks loose in me because it makes him cry harder.”
THIS SCENE, THIS MOMENT!! IT WAS MY UNDOING!!! I cried so hard when I read it!! I swear I was a sobbing and aching mess!!! This was so beautiful and raw and painful, so damn freaking bittersweet!!! Tanner’s mom comforting Sebastian, hugging him even though his own mother should have hugged him instead, telling him that he is wonderful and precious and that he is amazing just the way he is!!! TANNER’S MOM TELLING HIM EVERYTHING HE NEEDED TO HEAR!!! Tanner’s mom, not his own!!! OH GOD!!! My heart is breaking once again. That poor boy, that lost and broken soul!!! The reaction of Tanner’s mom moved me so much, I have no words…. <333
”He’s gay; he didn’t die. Nobody is wounded. I know Sebastian’s parents are good people, but holy hell, they just inadvertently made their son feel like there’s something about him that needs to be fixed.”
Never in my entire life will I ever be able to understand how you can disown your own child!!! I mean you’re supposed to love your kid, it’s your role to protect it from harm!!! YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR THAT LITTLE LIFE!!!! I love my daughter so much, I love her unconditionally, I would do everything for her!! I would even die for her!!! And because of that I can’t understand how Sebastian’s family could be so cruel to him! Especially his mother!!! I mean he only asked them what would happen if one of them was gay and they didn’t speak to him for an ENTIRE WEEK!!!! How can you do something like that to your own child!!!???? And to blame him for being gay?! Like he could change it, like it would be his own choice to be gay or not?! Like it’s a disease he can grow out of!!! ARGH!!! I can’t even….
”This was a week ago,” he whispers. When he looks up at me with tears in his eyes, he adds, “No one has spoken to me in a week.”
”I don’t even know how we got here, Sebastian. This? What you’re going through?” She stabs the air with savagely curled finger quotes around the words “going through.” ”This is your own doing. Heavenly Father is not responsible for your decisions. It is your free will alone that deprives you of happiness.”
”Her apron says KEEP CALM AND SERVE ON, and all he can think about is Tanner’s mom and her rainbow apron that embarrassed her son, and what Sebastian would give to have a parent who accepted him for what he was, no matter what.”
The ending of the book was so hopeful and sweet it actually made me light-headed and happy! <333 It was so cute that Tanner fell to the ground when he saw Sebastian and I really hope that they will find their way!!! Together of course!!! XD
All told, this book was amazing and if possible I’d give it all the stars and even more! “Autoboyograph” deserves so much more attention than it got and I hope my review will help to spread the word!!! READ IT!!! LOVE IT!! FIND YOURSELF IN IT AND BE BRAVE AND STRONG!!! Have the courage to be who you truly are!!! <333
Well, if that isn’t a message I want to spread, I really don’t know. *lol*
To say it with Fujita’s words:
”My deepest gratitude, Sebastian, for your bravery. I wish you well. You are an exceptional human, with depth and heart. Don’t let anyone – or anything – dim that light inside you.” ...more
Notes are private!
Nov 15, 2017
Dec 02, 2017
Sep 23, 2017
Sep 20, 2011
Apr 12, 2012
it was amazing
”We were like gods, at the dawning of the world, and our joy was so bright we could see nothing else but the other.”
Gosh I loved this ”We were like gods, at the dawning of the world, and our joy was so bright we could see nothing else but the other.”
Gosh I loved this book!!!
The moment I read the first page I was already certain of two things:
1.) This would become one of my all-time favourites and I’d gush about it like crazy.
2.) It wouldn’t only leave me devastated and heartbroken but also sobbing like a little child.
Well, both of those things came true, even way earlier than I had initially anticipated. I was about 37% percent in (yes I looked it up! ;-P) when I first started to cry and it didn’t get any better after that. This book was just so beautiful! So, so damn beautiful! Madeline Miller definitely has a way with words and I loved how this story was written: Poetical with a lot of mythological facts and with so many details that it succeeded to make this a more than just intriguing journey.
What I loved the most was how she managed to convey Achilles’ and Patroclus relationship though. Even though she never went into detail, never actually let them say that they loved each other; it was still palpable in every single moment they shared together. Those moments were so precious I couldn’t get enough of them and all I wanted was for them to be happy.
Unfortunately I’m a little geek and know a lot about Greek mythology so yeah, I already knew how it would end before it even ended. Still, the sense of foreboding in this book!!! Oh gosh, it killed me!! All those little hints, those infinitesimal innuendos, those tiny insinuations, they piled up and up and up until all I was able to feel was dread!!! By the end of the book I was reduced to a sobbing and crying nervous wreck and the final sentence was like a dagger in my heart.
In other words:
This was exceptionally painful and utterly devastating,
it was also so damn good and worth every second of pain!
This is my spoiler section in which I’m going to speak about the individual characters and what I thought of them. So you better beware and don’t read it if you still want to read the book. Heed my warning or get lost in the underworld. It’s your choice, choose wisely! ;-P
’Ah.’ A sly smile spread across his face; he had always loved defiance. ‘Well, why should I kill him? He’s done nothing to me.’
This sentence killed me when I first read it! Achilles, my beautiful, innocent and naïve boy!!! Jeez! I loved him so much! He was every bit the hero people believed him to be and most of the time he actually did the right thing. Well, most of the time. At the end of the book there happened a lot of things I didn’t agree with and the longer his conflict with Agamemnon lasted the more I dreaded the end! It made me so sad to see how much Achilles changed over the years and when the thing with Briseis happened my reaction was the same as Patroclus’! I mean I knew what Achilles did (I’m a geek remember?) but reading it the way Madeline Miller wrote it? Boy it destroyed me! There was this wonderful, perfect, righteous, honourable, intelligent, innocent and honest golden boy and then the war over Troy tainted him, transformed him and made him an entirely different person. The true tragedy about this all is that he never even wanted to take part in the war, he was more or less forced into it and I think looking at it in retrospective a life as a normal person would have been preferable to the one of a hero. I guess in the end Achilles saw it the same way and would have done everything in order to change his path. Even if it would have meant that he would have been forgotten and would have never become a legend… it would have been worth it. Patroclus would have been worth it… *cries*
”I stopped watching for ridicule, the scorpion’s tail hidden in his words. He said what he meant; he was puzzled if you did not. Some people might have mistaken this for simplicity. But is it not a sort of genius to cut always to the heart?”
”Your honour could be darkened by it.”
“Then it is darkened.” His jaw shot forward, stubborn. “They are fools if they let my glory rise or fall on this.”
“But Odysseus –“
His eyes, green as spring leaves, met mine. “Patroclus. I have given enough to them. I will not give them this.”
”They grinned, loving every inch of their miraculous prince: his gleaming hair, his deadly hands, his nimble feet. They leaned towards him, like flowers to the sun, drinking in his lustre. It was as Odysseus had said: he had light enough to make heroes of them all.”
”It is not true. You left yourself today. And now you are returned.”
His shoulders rise and fall on a long breath. “Do not say that,” he says, “until you have heard the rest of what I have done.”
”I went to Peleus. I knelt before him on a wool rug, woven bright with purple. He started to speak, but I was too quick for him. One of my hands went to clasp his knees, the other reached upward, to seize his chin with my hand. The pose of supplication. It was a gesture I had seen many times, but had never made myself. I was under his protection now; he was bound to treat me fairly, by the law of the gods.
‘Tell me where he is,’ I said.”
I adored Patroclus! He was the best! He was wonderful and beautiful in his own way and I loved how faithful he was. That boy was one of the kindest and sweetest people I ever read about (tough competition for Lazlo Strange *lol*) and I was so happy Achilles saw this too. He realized that Patroclus is special and he encouraged him to speak his mind. It felt like Patroclus was Achilles’ conscience, intervening whenever his divine heritage showed. Without Patroclus Achilles path would have been dark and bloody but with him at his side he became the glorious figure we all know about. Patroclus was so much more than just a companion. He was a friend, a lover, a teacher, a conscience, a reminder and Achilles past, present and future! This boy was literally the embodiment of Achilles life and actions and the people around them were fools for not seeing their strong connection. Patroclus was everything that was good about Achilles, he brought out the best in him. Taught him compassion and love, he was an anchor and someone he could come home to! Speak to! Confide in! Once Patroclus was gone the relentless godly part of Achilles showed though and the rest of it is (bloody) history. T_T
’Patroclus.’ It was the name my father had given me, hopefully but injudiciously, at my birth, and it tasted of bitterness on my tongue. ‘Honour of the father,’ it meant.
”Perhaps she thought I was mocking her, flourishing my triumph. Perhaps she thought I hated her. She did not know that I almost asked him, a hundred times, to be a little kinder to her. You do not have to humiliate her so thoroughly, I thought. But it was not kindness he lacked, it was interest. His gaze passed over her as if she were not here.”
’Willl you come with me?’ he asked.
The never-ending ache of love and sorrow. Perhaps in some other life I could have refused, could have torn my hair and screamed, and made him face his choice alone. But not in this one. He would sail to Troy and I would follow, even into death.
Yes, I whispered. Yes.
”I do not know this man, I think. He is no one I have ever seen before. My rage towards him is hot as blood. I will never forgive him. I imagine tearing down our tent, smashing the lyre, stabbing myself in the stomach and bleeding to death. I want to see his face broken with grief and regret. I want to shatter the cold mask of stone that has slipped down over the boy I knew. He has given her to Agamemnon knowing what will happen.”
”May I give you some advice? If you are truly his friend you will help him leave his soft heart behind. He’s going to Troy to kill men, not rescue them.” His dark eyes held me like swift-running current. “He is a weapon, a killer. Do not forget it. You can use a spear as a walking stick, but that will not change its nature.”
Damn, how much I hated and liked that sneaky and cunning bastard!! I’m still very torn when it comes to him. On the one hand he gave sound advice and knew exactly what he did and on the other hand he forced Achilles on his destined path. If it wouldn’t have been for Odysseus he would have never gone to Troy and even though I agree with his sentiment that Achilles could save them all, I still disagree with the way he played him. Of all the countless men that manipulated young Achilles, Odysseus probably was the worst, hiding behind the mask of a friend but ultimately pursuing his own goals. Clever! Very clever indeed!
”Then you are a traitor to this army, and will be punished like one. Your war prizes are hostage, placed in my care until you offer your obedience and submission. Let us start with that girl. Briseis, is her name? She will do as a penance for the girl you have forced me to return.”
I HATE AGAMEMNON!!! Fiercely!!! Such an unfair and dishonourable numpty!!! I hate him and all his actions! I mean what kind of father would trade his daughter away and then kill her?! His own flesh and blood! Gosh, I CAN’T EVEN WITH HIM!! I’m still so angry! Those moments at the end and the tense situation between Achilles and him had me at the edge of my seat and all I wanted to do was to scream at the injustice that took place in front of me!!! Such a stubborn and self-righteous fool!! He should have listened to Achilles but he was too proud to. *shakes head in disbelief* I. HATE. HIM!!! Enough said!
Another person that landed on my shit list! *lol* I really, really disliked her too! I mean I understand that she was Achilles mother and only wanted the best for her son, but it was more than just obvious that the best was Patroclus and I hated her for always trying to drive a wedge between them! Without Thetis half of their troubles wouldn’t have even existed and even though she kind of redeemed herself in the end I still don’t like her! Sorry Thet, but you’ll never get a thumbs-up from me! #SorryNotSorrry
Achilles & Patroclus:
”This morning he had leaped on to my bed and pressed his nose against mine. ‘Good morning,’ he’d said. I remembered the heat of him against my skin.”
Ohh how sweet those two were! I loved their relationship! They were so gentle and adorable and no matter what happened and no matter how many obstacles were in their way they always managed to find back to each other! They had confidence in each other and they supported each other regardless of the consequences. Achilles and Patroclus had such an honest and beautiful relationship, I CAN’T EVEN!!!! THIS was the real deal!!! A connection so deep that no one could destroy it, a love so strong that it cast aside all obstacles, their trust so deep that they could talk about everything!!! Boy, I could gush about this relationship at eye level for eternity and still would never get tired of it! *lol* I just adore them so much! It was so sweet they couldn’t even be angry with each other and even though Patroclus wasn’t always happy with Achilles decisions, he still did his best to support him as best as he could, even if that meant that he had to go against his will. I think in the end their unconditional love for each other was the only thing that was able to break them and it eventually did. Jeez! How it did! *cries again* Achilles had no reason to kill Hector, no reason to fulfil the prophecy. Well, at least not until Hector took the only thing that mattered to him, the only thing he didn’t want to live without. Patroclus! *sobs* Hell! The way Achilles grieved!!! It broke my freaking heart!!! It was like a punch in the gut! I know first-hand how much this hurts, how painful it is to lose a person you love so much, and boy did it trigger my emotions. T_T I felt Achilles grief with him and it was so intense it left me crying and sobbing. They were so beautiful together… so, so, so damn beautiful. I can’t anymore… *weeps*
”I saw then how I had changed. I did not mind any more, that I lost when we raced and I lost when we swam out to the rocks and I lost when we tossed spears or skipped stones. For who can be ashamed to lose to such beauty? It was enough to watch him win, to see the soles of his feet flashing as they kicked up sand, or the rise and fall of his shoulders as he pulled through the salt. It was enough.”
”My pulse jumps, for no reason I can name. He has looked at me a thousand times, but there is something different in this gaze, an intensity I do not know. My mouth is dry, and I can hear the sound of my throat as I swallow.
He watches me. It seems that he is waiting.”
”His eyes were unwavering, green flecked with gold. A certainty rose in me, lodged in my throat. I will never leave him. It will be this, always, for as long as he will let me.”
”Had she really thought I would not know him? I could recognize him by touch alone, by smell, I would know him blind, by the way his breaths came and his feet struck the earth. I would know him in death, at the end of the world.”
”You can’t.” He was sitting up now, leaning forward.
“I know. They never let you be famous and happy.” He lifted an eyebrow. “I’ll tell you a secret.”
“Tell me.” I loved it when he was like this.
“I’m going to be the first.” He took my palm and held it to him. “Swear it.”
“Because you’re the reason. Swear it.”
“I swear it,” I said, lost in the high colour of his cheeks, the flame in his eyes.
“I swear it,” he echoed.
”There was more to say, but for once we did not say it. There would be other times for speaking, tonight and tomorrow and all the days after that. He let go of my hand.”
All told this was one of the most beautiful books I’ve ever read. It caused me to cry, it made me angry, it made me smile and it touched me deeply. I’m a total mess after reading this and my emotions are still all over the place, to say I regret reading it would be one hell of a lie though.
I rarely write this into my reviews but: If you haven’t read this, do it now!!! You won’t regret it! =)
Last but not least I want to thank my Sweet Sugar Bun who dared to buddy read this book with me! Thank you for all the comments, messages and updates that made it bearable to read this book. I swear if you wouldn’t have discussed this with me I would have cried even more often than I already did. *lol* So yeah, thanks for that wonderful buddy read and for keeping my sanity intact. I really appreciate it! XD We definitely should go for another buddy read some time soon! I heard “Circe” is a nice book too! *lol* ;-P
In the darkness, two shadows, reaching through the hopeless, heavy dusk. Their hands meet, and light spills in a flood, like a hundred golden urns pouring out the sun.”
Notes are private!
Jun 21, 2018
Jul 02, 2018
Aug 04, 2017
Oct 06, 2015
May 09, 2017
it was amazing
”You’re so alive, Simon Snow.
You got my share of it.”
This is probably going to be the most incoherent review I’ve ever written but I just can’t seem t ”You’re so alive, Simon Snow.
You got my share of it.”
This is probably going to be the most incoherent review I’ve ever written but I just can’t seem to be able to contain myself!!! I mean we’re talking about SIMON AND BAZ!!! BAZ AND SIMON!!! <333
OMG!!! I can’t even!!! THEY ARE EVERYTHING AND EVEN MORE!!! XD
Their love reduced me to a babbling and giggling mess and I can’t stop to grin! I’m still grinning like a Cheshire cat and it’s starting to hurt!!! BUT oh god, how much I loved those two!!!
There are no words that would do them justice so suffice it to say that I died at least a thousand deaths!! <333 They are too freaking adorable and I want more!! I just want more!!! Rainbow do you hear me?!
I. WANT. MORE!!!! *dies*
Oh, sorry! Was I out cold again?
This book WAS EVERYTHING!
BAZ IS EVERYTHING!
SIMON IS EVERYTHING!
And Baz and Simon GAVE ME LIFE!!! <3333
They obviously gave me cardiac arrhythmia too and I think chances are high I’ll never recover!!! Still, I’ll never regret that I read this book and it will forever have a special place in my heart! =)))
This said I’m heading straight to the characters section because I’m pretty certain that you all know about the plot by now! ;-) If not: The Insidious Humdrum (Haha! What a name!!!) is threatening to destroy the magical world and Simon Snow isn’t only the most powerful mage of the world but also the only one who seems to be able to stop him.
Okay, from now on there will be a ton of spoilers and quotes and uncontrolled, incoherent stuttering! If you still want to continue: You’ve been warned!!! ;-P
”I don’t know”, he says, closing his eyes. “I guess I’ve never thought much about what I am. I’ve got a lot on my plate.”
Simon Snow!!! He’s clumsy, completely oblivious, he doesn’t get anything right and he’s basically a catastrophe walking on two legs! And for some reason that makes him adorable as hell!!! *LOL* Seriously, Simon is like a puppy you just want to cuddle! I can understand why Baz loves him so much and can’t seem to be able to get enough of him! Gosh there were so many moments between those too! It was so funny to see how obsessed Simon was and to read that he had absolutely no clue why he was even so obsessed with Baz! XD I mean Jeez Louise!!! He noticed that Baz looked thinner than usual and that he’s limping and he ran to his house at Christmas just to tell him what he’d found out! Ohh and how he almost lost his mind just because Baz wore jeans!!!!! *LOL* I loved their conversations, because they were always so tender and sweet! Even when they still claimed to be enemies there was always tension in the air!!! <333
”I don’t get to choose a plan. I just take it as it comes. And someday, something will catch me unawares or be too big to fight, but I’ll fight anyway. I’ll fight until I can’t anymore – what is there to think about?”
”I’ve never turned my back on you. And I’m not starting now.”
”He’s not a monster. He’s just a villain.
He’s not a villain. He’s just a boy.
I’m kissing a boy.
I’m kissing Baz.”
CHAPTER 61 WAS MY UNDOING!!! I read it 8 times!!! I just couldn’t stop to read it!!! It was so damn sweet!!! What they thought, how they reacted! AREAFDKASDLFASDFKASFDJA!!!! I CAN’T EVEN!!!!
”I’m going to die kissing Simon Snow…
Simon Snow is going to die kissing me.”
”Why are you already weeping?” he snarled. “You’re ruining my plans to push you to tears.”
Tyrannus Basilton Grimm-Pitch!!! THAT BOY LITERALLY KILLED ME!!! I loved everything about Baz!!! Oh god, I can’t even!!! I’m fangirling so hard here I have to calm down so I can write a proper sentence!!! XD Okay, I think I can write now! I loved how rude he was, how his actions were in stark contrast to everything he thought!!! ARGH!!! AEDKLASDLKFASKD!!! His attitude!!! I mean he really “dared them fucking all” and it was sooo damn amazing to watch!!! XD BUT oh god! His thoughts were so hilarious and tender and I couldn’t get enough of it!!! Baz’s chapters gave me LIFE and I loved each and every single one of them!!! I loved how he noticed that Simon was too thin and how he tried to get him to eat something when they were about to solve the mystery of his mother’s death! I mean he even thought about bringing Simon food, because he knows that he needs it to function properly!!! And he didn’t let him go on Christmas!!! Every single one of Baz’s actions was performed with deliberate care and Simon never realised anything!!! <333 Haha! Oh and that moment when Baz called Simon “love” for the very first time? IT WAS THE DEATH OF ME!!! <333
”And when I felt myself slipping too far, I held on to the one thing I’m always sure of –
The fact that Simon Snow is the most powerful magician alive. That nothing can hurt him, not even me.
That Simon Snow is alive.
And I’m hopelessly in love with him.”
”It dawned on me during our fifth year. When he followed me around like a dog tied to my ankle. When he wouldn’t give me a single moment of solace to sort through my feelings – or try to wank them away.”
”Sharing a room with the person you want most is like sharing a room with an open fire.
He’s constantly drawing you in. And you’re constantly stepping too close. And you know it’s not good – that there is no good – that there’s absolutely nothing that can ever come of it.
But you do it anyway.
And then …
Well. Then you burn.”
”You were the sun, and I was crashing into you. I’d wake up every morning and think, ‘This will end in flames.’ “
I was so glad that Simon had her as a friend!! Penelope is amazing and I loved how she bonded with Baz!!! XD Their conversation about his mother was so intriguing and I think their friendship will be awesome! =))) Plus I loved how Penny thought about Simon. Her POV was always so nice to read because she truly cared about him and always wanted his best! She wanted him to be okay, to survive and if it would have been possible she would have even run away with him!! Penny is intelligent, brilliant and blunt and probably the best friend anyone can have! In short: She is amazing and Simon was more than just lucky to have her at his side!!! <333
”I can’t break up with Simon for a Tory vampire – my parents would disown me. And I don’t even know what that would entail. Would I have to be evil?”
I didn’t like Agatha!!! She was such an egoistic and spoilt brat!!! She was so self-centred; she never even spent a thought about what other people wanted! To read her POV was horrible and the more I read about her, the more I disliked her! How can anyone be so shallow-brained? Plus, she ran away and never even thought about helping her friends!!! What a stupid girl!!!
”I wish I were wearing something other than leggings and Ugg boots. I always figured I’d make a more beautiful corpse.”
”The Greatest Mage is our only hope now.
But our greatest mage is fundamentally flawed. Cracked. Broken.”
The second character I didn’t like! The mage was so mean! All he wanted to do was to use his son and poor Simon would have done almost everything in order to please him!! I hated how he thought about Simon and I felt really sorry for Lucy! She didn’t deserve to be used like that! =( It makes me sad that Simon never found out who his parents were and I kind of hate Agatha for keeping it a secret! I mean if she would have told them about Lucy and Davy, Simon and the others sooner or later would have figured it out! I’m sure of that!!! But since she was a coward and ran away they never even got a chance to think about it!
All told, I really loved this book and I never ever wanted it to end! I swear I’m going to buy a physical copy of “Carry On” and then I’ll take it to my bed and cuddle it until I fall asleep!!! *LOL* Yes, that’s how much I loved it!!! <333
So if you want some fluff in your life, if you want to grin like a Cheshire cat and if you want to laugh out loud while sitting in a train: READ THIS BOOK!!! You won’t regret it! ;-P
”What you are is a fucking tragedy, Simon Snow. You literally couldn’t be a bigger mess.”
He tries to kiss me, but I hold back – “And you like that?”
“I love it,” he says.
“Because we match.”
Notes are private!
Oct 20, 2017
Nov 11, 2017
Jul 22, 2017
Sep 18, 2012
Jul 30, 2013
it was amazing
”He felt raw: the chronicle of his fiercest desire stripped from him by force.”
After finishing “The Raven Boys” I have about a thousand of questions, ”He felt raw: the chronicle of his fiercest desire stripped from him by force.”
After finishing “The Raven Boys” I have about a thousand of questions, the most pressing one however is the following:
Why did I wait so long to read this freaking awesome book???
I mean seriously!!?? What’s wrong with me!?
How could I survive without knowing about “The Raven Cycle”?!
I loved this book! It was so magical and mysterious and all the characters were so unique and well developed! What I loved the most was the way they interacted though! Those four boys have such a deep friendship it’s almost unbelievable! They care so much for each other, yet they all have their own troubles and worries that constantly seem to get in their way! Each and every single one of them is somehow broken, but together they are whole! Gosh!! I can’t even describe how wonderful they are but suffice it to say that this book is going to turn your world upside down! ;-) Well, that and your emotions! Jeez! This was such a roller coaster my hair is still messy and tangled from the ride! *lol*
I guess to know what I’m talking about you just have to read the book and make this experience for yourself. I’m pretty certain the majority of you won’t regret it and I can almost guarantee that sooner or later you will realise that you’ve grown fond of “The Raven Boys” as well! ;-P They just have a way to sneak into your heart and once you’ve opened up there is no going back! XD
”More than anything, the journal wanted. It wanted more than it could hold, more than words could describe, more than diagrams could illustrate. Longing burst from the pages, in every frantic line and every hectic sketch and every dark-printed definition. There was something pained and melancholy about it.”
Blue Sargent is the daughter of a psychic and has grown up in a family that knows and sees things others don’t. Every member of her family has a special talent and so does Blue! She’s some sort of supernatural amplifier and is able to strengthen the abilities of others, yet she can’t use her gift to see ghosts as well. Well, at least not until the night of St. Marks Eve when she meets the ghost of a boy named Gansey. Apparently the only reason she’s able to see him is because he’s her true love and before she even knows it, Blue is already smack in the middle of a magical quest that drives her straight into the arms of a group of four Aglionby Boys. There are only two problems: First, Blue swore herself never to get involved with any of the Aglionby Boys and secondly, there’s a rather dark prophecy that claims that she’s going to cause the death of her true love…
”But Gansey was already grabbing the car keys to the Pig and stepping around his miniature Henrietta. Even though Ronan was snarling and Noah was sighing and Adam was hesitating, he didn’t turn to verify that they were coming. He knew they were. In three different ways, he’d earned them all days or weeks or months before, and when it came to it, they’d all follow him anywhere.”
This is the moment where I tell you that you’ll be hopelessly spoiled if you continue to read my review! So consider yourself warned and proceed at your own risk! ;-P
”As always there was an all-American war hero look to him, coded in his tousled brown hair, his summer-narrowed hazel eyes, the straight nose that ancient Anglo-Saxons had graciously passed on to him. Everything about him suggested valor and power and a firm handshake.”
Gansey is so precious!! He is some sort of mother hen and cares for all of his boys and I just couldn’t help but had to love him for it! Alone the way he expressed himself, how he spoke, what he thought and his journal, gosh how much I adored him for writing his journal!!! This boy is pure poetry and whenever I read his POV I was so intrigued that I just wanted to read even more! XD I loved how he worried about Adam, Ronan and Noah, how he knew that he appeared to be arrogant but still couldn’t seem to be able to change it. Oh, how he broke my heart! And then his story about the hornets’ nest!? Gosh it gave me the creeps!! I’m allergic to bees and wasps as well and when I was about eight years old I made a rather similar experience. *shudders* THIS hit way too close to home and I actually had to stop to read when he told his story! ARGH! I’m getting goose bumps just thinking about it! *lol* I really don’t know how he’s going to deal with Adam’s betrayal and I can’t wait to find out in the next book! I just hope their relationship isn’t broken because of it!!
”Adam was struck, as he occasionally was, by Gansey’s agelessness: an old man in a young body, or a young man in an old man’s life.”
”In the end, he was nobody to Adam, he was nobody to Ronan. Adam spit his words back at him and Ronan squandered however many second chances he gave him. Gansey was just a guy with a lot of stuff and a hole inside him that chewed away more of his heart every year."
”My words are unerring tools of destruction, and I’ve come unequipped with the ability to disarm them. Can you believe I’m only alive because Noah died? What a fine sacrifice that was, what a fine contribution to the world I am.”
I really liked Blue! She was so nice and kind and even though everyone told her to stay away from the boy’s she was just too curious to actually go through with it! *lol* I loved that she always tried to see the good in those four boys, especially Ronan! ;-P And it was sooo damn sweet how she interacted with Noah!!! =))) Those two were amazing! *lol* Whenever Noah patted her head I was like: Awww!
I think I kind of low-key ship them even though I know that this is never going to happen! Haha! I’m really curious how Blue’s character is going to develop and I can’t wait to get to know her even better!
”Unlike Ronan, Adam’s Aglionby sweater was secondhand, but he’d taken great care to be certain it was impeccable. He was slim and tall, with dusty hair unevenly cropped above a fineboned, tanned face. He was a sepia photograph.
Oh, Adam!!! He’s such a precious cinnamon roll!!! I love this boy and I’m so sorry that he had to endure the abuse of his father!! How could he dare to hurt my precious boy so much??!! I could understand why Adam wanted to be independent and didn’t want to rely on Gansey! He wanted to do things his way and I respect that! Still, sometimes he was a little bit too stubborn for his own good and I really wish he would have accepted Gansey’s offer to live with him! I can’t bear the thought that he’ll never be able to hear on his left ear again and gosh I’m so glad Ronan came to his rescue and intervened!!! XD I think of all the characters in this book, Adam actually went through the biggest character development and I really hope that he’s going to be okay in the next book! I know why he woke the lay line but I’m worried about the price he’ll have to pay! >_<
”The ripped knees of Adam’s camo cargo pants appeared first, then his faded Coca-Cola T-shirt, then, finally, his face. A bruise spread over his cheekbone, red and swelling as a galaxy. A darker one snaked over the bridge of his nose.
Gansey said immediately, “You’re leaving with me.”
”It means I never get to be my own person. If I let you cover for me, then I’m yours. I’m his now, and then I’ll be yours.”
”Where do you live?”
Adam’s mouth was very set. “A place made for leaving.”
“That’s not really an answer.”
“It’s not really a place.”
”Gansey had once told Adam that he was afraid most people didn’t know how to handle Ronan. What he meant by this was that he was worried that one day someone would fall on Ronan and cut themselves.”
Well if that quote doesn’t describe Ronan perfectly then I really don’t know! XD Oh, man! That boy was so awesome! XD I loved his grumpiness and his attitude! Despite his rather mean and very honest statements he seemed to have a pretty soft side and even though it was hidden so well, there were still some moments when you could see it! =) I wish we would have gotten his POV as well, but I guess Maggie had her reasons to hold it back! Hopefully we’ll get Ronan’s POV in the second book though and if “yes”, you’ll certainly read it in my updates. *LOL* I’m curious to find out more about his background and I really want to know why he and his brother are at odds! AND what happened to his father?!! This question is still playing on my mind and I can’t help but wonder what happened when he found him!
”Ronan kept staring at Whelk. He was good at staring. There was something about his stare that took something from the other person.”
”You look like a super villain with your familiar,” Adam said.
Ronan’s smile cut his face, but he looked kinder than Blue had ever seen him, like the raven in his hand was his heart, finally laid bare.
”Noah, unlike his pristine room, always seemed a little grubby. There was something out of place about his clothing, his mostly combed-back fair hair. His unkempt uniform always made Adam feel a little less like he stuck out.”
I’m so sorry that he’s a ghost! I already anticipated it because I picked up on the clues, but I really wish my perceptive mind would have been wrong! *sighs* I never liked Whelk and I can’t understand how he could kill such a nice and cute boy!! I mean he was his friend!!! Poor Noah! To be betrayed like that! Still, I’m glad they managed to get his bones to the church and I hope he’s going to be a permanent part of the next three books! =)
”I’ve been dead for seven years,” Noah said. “That’s as warm as they get.”
”Can we go home? This place is so creepy.”
Gansey & Blue :
He paused, his smile wide and benevolent. “This is all down to you. Putting us on the line, finally. I could kiss you.”
Though he was obviously joking, Blue skittered to the side.
I loved those two right from the beginning! They have such a nice chemistry and I can’t wait to see how they’ll fall in love! Right now it doesn’t seem to be likely, but we all read about Blue’s vision in the tree and I have no doubt that they’ll actually end up together! I guess I’ll just have to wait and see what Maggie Stiefvater has up her sleeve! *lol* ;-P
Ronan & Adam :
Adam and Blue Who? *looks innocent*
Ronan said, “I’m always straight.”
Adam replied, “Oh, man, that’s the biggest lie you’ve ever told.”
I know this is no official ship
I WILL GO DOWN WITH THIS SHIP!!!! I swear there were so many moments between Adam and Ronan and if they don’t get together in one of those four books I’m going to cry a freaking ocean!! I mean it!!! I’ll die if Maggie Stiefvater doesn’t work her magic with those two!!! THEY JUST HAVE TO BECOME CANON!!! Period!!! Enough said! XD *faints*
”As Adam stared at his lap, penitent, he mused that there was something musical about Ronan when he swore, a careful and loving precision to the way he fit the words together, a black-painted poetry.”
”He stroked Chainsaw’s head with a single finger and she tilted her beak up in response. It was a strange moment in a strange evening, and if it had happened the day before, it would’ve struck Adam that he rarely saw such thoughtless kindness from Ronan.”
The bottom line:
I LOVED THIS BOOK!!! I loved it with all my heart and all my being!!!
Maggie Stiefvater is a genius and I can’t wait to dig my claws into the next book!! XD
“The Dream Thieves” I’m coming!!!
P.S: Before I forget: This was a buddy read with the amazing Katherine and I’m so glad we could experience this together!!! You were the perfect buddy to read this book! ;-) ...more
Notes are private!
Oct 04, 2017
Oct 18, 2017
Jul 15, 2017
Feb 04, 2014
Feb 04, 2014
it was amazing
”Words, I think, are such unpredictable creatures.
No gun, no sword, no army or king will ever be more powerful than a sentence. Swords may cut and kil ”Words, I think, are such unpredictable creatures.
No gun, no sword, no army or king will ever be more powerful than a sentence. Swords may cut and kill, but words will stab and stay, burying themselves in our bones to become corpses we carry into the future, all the time digging and failing to rip their skeletons from our flesh.”
Do you still remember my review of “Unravel me”?
Okay! Then let me tell you something:
“Ignite me” was so much better than the last book!!!!
I don’t know how Tahereh Mafi did it but she killed me!!!! I died about a thousand deaths while I read this book and I have absolutely no clue how I even survived to read this!!! Gosh, that book left me reeling and laughing and gasping and crying and swooning and drooling and I had absolutely no idea what to do with all those feels!!!
I bit my nails, I was desperate, I was hopeful, I wanted to smash the book against a wall - which would have been pretty bad because I read it on my e-reader and I’m quite certain it wouldn’t have survived this special kind of treatment *lol* - I wanted to shake some of the characters, wanted to yell at them, I wanted to laugh with them, I wanted to punch some sense into their heads. (Yeah, Adam it’s you I’m talking about!!!) And most of all I really, really wanted them to be happy and fine!!!
So yeah, I think you get the idea! ;-)
It was an emotional rollercoaster and I actually loved every second of it! *lol*
That said I guess I can finally jump to the actual review! I hope you manage to read until the end. If not: You’ve been brave and I don’t blame you! ;-P
"My eyes are filling fast with tears and I blink and blink but the world is a mess and I want to laugh because all I can think is how horrible and beautiful it is, that our eyes blur the truth when we can’t bear to see it."
The book basically starts where “Unravel me” left off. Juliette has been saved by Warner and was brought back to base while she was unconscious. In the first chapter we learn that Omega Point has been destroyed completely and that Warner had no other choice than to smuggle Juliette into his private quarters. Of course our heroine is not happy about the bad new and wants to find out what truly happened and if anyone is still alive. So yeah our golden boy and our lethal girl decide to take a trip to the place where Omega Point used to be and it’s actually there, where the plot thickens and everything gains momentum! ;-) Since I don’t want to spoil you I decided to leave it at that, I’m pretty certain that most of you have already read the entire trilogy though.
So for everyone who’s already read the books and for everyone who doesn’t want to be spoiled:
The character’s section is going to be full, I repeat, full of spoilers!!! So beware my fellow readers! Ye be warned!!! ;-P *lol*
Juliette: I loved how self-confident and strong Juliette has become. She’s finally capable of forming her own opinions and she doesn’t take – forgive me my crude choice of words – shit anymore! *lol* The old Juliette would have cowered and accepted the way Adam treated her, the new Juliette kicked ass!!! Quite literally as well! XD I was so proud of her! She finally had the courage to stand up for herself and her beliefs and she didn’t only make her own decisions but also made sure to follow through with them! It was amazing to watch her transformation and I was so glad she finally found herself!!! There was only one thing I didn’t like about her and that was how she let Warner suffer! How dare you Juliette! How dare you to break his wonderful and gentle heart!!!! I mean jeez I know you had to think things through, but seriously!!!! It’s WARNER we’re talking about!!!! That awesome hot guy who’s crazy and madly in love with you!!!! XD Open your freakin eyes!!! *lol* Okay, okay enough of the rant, everything is fine! ;-)
”Or,” I say to him, “I leave, find your father, kill him, and deal with the consequences on my own.”
Warner fights a smile and fails.
He glances down and laughs just a little before looking me right in the eye. He shakes his head.
“What’s so funny?”
“My dear girl.”
“I have been waiting for this moment for a long time now.”
"I can’t be that girl anymore.
For so many years I lived in constant terror of myself. Doubt had married my fear and moved into my mind, where it built castles and ruled kingdoms and reigned over me, bowing my will to its whispers until I was little more than an acquiescing peon, too terrified to disobey, too terrified to disagree.
I had been shackled, a prisoner in my own mind.”
”I remember it so well.” I hesitate. “Dying. It was the most painful thing I’ve ever experienced. I couldn’t scream because my lungs were torn apart or full of blood. I don’t know. I just had to lie there, trying to breathe, hoping to drop dead as quickly as possible. And the whole time,” I say, “the whole time I kept thinking about how I’d spent my entire life being a coward, and how it got me nowhere. And I knew that if I had the chance to do it all again, I’d do it differently. I promised myself I’d finally stop being afraid.”
”This isn’t about Adam or Warner,” I tell him. “This is about me and what I want. This is about me finally understanding where I want to be in ten years. Because I’m going to be alive, Kenji. I will be alive in ten years, and I’m going to be happy. I’m going to be strong. And I don’t need anyone to tell me that anymore. I am enough, and I always will be.”
Adam: Well, I think I’ve to take that back. Nothing is fine when it comes to Adam. Adam… that name… I just have to think about him and I become aggressive. Oh man, I seriously have issues with that boy!!! I already wanted to slap some sense into him while I read “Unravel me”, reading about his character in “Ignite me” I was actually tempted to punch him in the face! Gosh!! That stupid, stupid, stubborn, selfish, obnoxious and incorrigible jerk!!! And that’s actually me putting it more than just mildly! I hate him, I loathe him, I want to scratch him with my fingernails! How dare he to be so egoistic and mean!? When I read chapter 27 I was so angry I wanted to slap him in his stupid pretty face!!! Saying that he was happier when he thought Juliette was dead?!!?? I mean seriously!!??? WHAT THE FREAKIN HELL!??!!! Don’t you have any decency?! And then he even has the nerve to throw her out and to keep his relation to Warner a secret? *grrrrrr* I could go on and on about how much I despise him now, but I think I’ll just leave it at that. ADAM is dead to me and the fact he decided to get to know Warner in the end still doesn’t change anything about my opinion! What a stupid fool!!!
”It’s not charity,” I snap. “He cares about me – and I care about him!”
Warner nods, unimpressed. “You should get a dog, love. I hear they share much the same qualities.”
What do you know about being alive?” he demands. “You wouldn’t say a word when I first found you. You were afraid of your own shadow. You were so consumed by your grief and guilt that you’d gone almost completely insane – living so far inside your own head that you had no idea what happened to the world while you were gone.”
You don’t even know what you’re saying,” Kenji tells him. “You’re acting crazy – “
“I was happier,” Adam says, “when I thought she was dead.”
“You don’t mean that. Don’t say things like that, man. Once you say that kind of shit you can’t take it back –“
“Oh, I mean it,” Adam says. “I really, really mean it.” He finally looks at me. Fists clenched. “Thinking you were dead,” he says to me, “was so much better. It hurt so much less than this.”
“And right now, I can’t say I know what Adam would do if I were dying in front of him. I’m not sure if he would save my life. And that uncertainty alone makes me certain that something wasn’t right between us. Something wasn’t real.
Maybe we both fell in love with the illusion of something more.”
He’s standing at the front door, hands shoved casually in his pockets, no fewer than six different guns pointed at his face.”
Oh Warner… *sighs dreamily* With every book I read I loved that boy more and more! He still is awesomeness on two legs and if possible he got even more awesome throughout the book. Gosh, how much I love him!!! I’m Warner trash, I want to have his babies, he’s the perfect man and he’s easily become my no.1 book boyfriend. (Well, truth be told Will and he seem to share that place now. *LOL*) We finally saw more of his vulnerable side and I loved E.V.E.R.Y single S.E.C.O.N.D of it!!! I loved how he came to Juliette rescue when Adam and her had that argument back at Adam’s house and I was so heartbroken when he tried to hide his scars in chapter 32. And good god, I swear when I read chapter 50 it broke my heart into tiny little pieces. I was crying so hard I was even forced to take a break. That chapter literally killed me! I was so overwhelmed by my emotions I could barely breathe. My heart ached so much… that poor lost boy, to read that chapter was pure torture and just to remember it is actually enough to cause me to weep again. *sniff* Warner suffered and hurt so much throughout the entire book and all I wanted to do was to cradle him and to take his pain away. No one deserves to be so miserable and alone and I really hated Adam for hiding his and James’s true identity. If I’m entirely honest I also kind of hated Juliette for being so indecisive and when they finally hit it off I was so happy I grinned the entire time. =))))))
I’ve said it before, love, and I’m sorry I have to say it again, but you do not understand the choices I have to make. You don’t know what I’ve seen and what I’m forced to witness every single day.” He hesitates. “And I wouldn’t want you to. But do not presume to understand my actions,” he says, finally meeting my eyes. “Because if you do, I can assure you you’ll only be met with disappointment. And if you insist on continuing to make assumptions about my character, I’ll advise you only this: assume you will always be wrong.”
“He wasn’t trying to patronize me.
He was enjoying himself.
Aaron Warner Anderson, chief commander and regent of Sector 45, son of the supreme commander of The Reestablishment.
He has a soft spot for fashion.”
”I have no one to impress,” he says. “No one who cares about what happens to me. I’m not in the business of making friends, love. My job is to lead an army, and it’s the only thing I’m good at. No one,” he says, “would be proud of the things I’ve accomplished. My mother doesn’t even know me anymore. My father thinks I’m weak and pathetic. My soldiers want me dead. The world is going to hell. And the conversations I have with you are the longest I’ve ever had.”
Warner takes a hard, shaky breath. “Then what did you say to him?”
Seven seconds die between us.
“Nothing,” I whisper.
I don’t breathe.
No one speaks for what feels like forever.
“Of course,” Warner finally says. He looks pale, unsteady. “You said nothing. Of course.”
”The bed is empty.
Warner has collapsed in the corner.
He’s curled into himself, knees pulled up to his chest, arms wrapped around his legs, his head buried in his arms. And he’s shaking.
Tremors are rocking his entire body.
I’ve never, ever seen him look like a child before. Never, not once, not in all the time I’ve known him. But right now, he looks just like a little boy. Scared. Vulnerable. All alone.”
”It’s the only way I know how to exist,” he says. “In a world where there is so much to grieve and so little good to take? I grieve nothing. I take everything.”
I stare into his eyes for what feels like forever.
He leans into my ear. Lowers his voice. “Ignite, my love. Ignite.”
Kenji: I think that boy is the most complex side character I ever had the pleasure to come across. *lol* He’s funny and serious at the same time and he cares so deeply for his friends that it’s sometimes even kind of painful to watch. I loved how he cared about Juliette and how he tried his best to support her. It was pretty obvious that he didn’t agree with her opinion about Warner, yet he still accepted her decision and tried everything possible in order to understand her motives. I really wish there would be more Kenji’s out in the world and I truly hope that Kenji finds true love in the next book. Do you hear me, Mafi? I want Kenji to have a girlfriend in “Restore me”!!! He deserves it, he sooo does!!! XD If you haven’t written a girlfriend for him already, you still got plenty of time to change this!!! ;-) So yeah, do it!!!!! Oh and by the way: That’s an order and no request!!! *LOL*
“You’re not bothered by all the heavy breathing going on over here?” He makes a haphazard gesture towards us.
I jump away from Adam reflexively.
“No,” James says, crossing his arms. “Are you?”
“Disgust was my general reaction, yeah.”
“I bet you wouldn’t think it was gross if it was you.”
A long pause.
“You make a good point,” Kenji finally says. “Maybe you should find me a lady in this crappy sector. I’m okay with anyone between the ages of eighteen and thirty-five.” He points at James. “So how about you get on that, thanks.”
“Good for you. I’ll buy you a balloon the minute the world stops shitting on itself.”
“Thank you,” I say, pleased. “You’re a good teacher.”
“I’m good at everything,” he points out.
“And really good looking.”
I choke on a laugh.
“It just gets really heavy sometimes.” He looks away. “Too heavy. Even for me. And some days I don’t want to laugh,” he says. “I don’t want to be funny. I don’t want to give a shit about anything. Some days I just want to sit on my ass and cry. All day long.” His hands stop moving against the mats. “Is that crazy?” he asks quietly, still not meeting my gaze.
”Who’s Bruce Lee?”
“Who’s Bruce Lee?” Kenji asks, horrified. “Oh my God. We can’t even be friends anymore.”
“Why? Was he a friend of yours?”
“You know what,” he says, “just stop. Just – I can’t even talk to you right now.”
James: Oh that little boy was just so adorable and I had to laugh so hard whenever he spoke with Warner! Those two brothers had such an awesome chemistry and I loved how open and unprejudiced James was! Unlike Adam he actually saw the good in Warner and I just loved him for it! XD
Warner studies Jame’s face with rapt fascination. He bends down on one knee, meets James at eye level. “And who are you?” he asks.
Everyone in the room is silent, watching.
”Why do you call her ‘love’?” James asks. “I’ve heard you say that before, too. A lot. Are you in love with her? I think Adam’s in love with her. Kenji’s not in love with her, though. I already asked him.”
Warner blinks at him.
“Well?” James asks.
“Are you in love with her?”
“Are you in love with her?”
“What?” James blushes. “No. She’s like a million years older than me.”
“Would anyone like to take over this conversation?” Warner asks, looking around in the group.
”So, wait – then you’re not the bad guy,” James says all of a sudden. “You’re on our side, right?”
Warner turns slowly to meet James’s eyes. Says nothing.
“Well?” James asks, impatient. “Aren’t you on our side?”
Warner blinks. Twice. “So it seems,” he says, looking as though he can hardly believe he’s saying it.
Anderson: Thank god he was finally shot and didn’t even get a proper chance to say anything! I swear everything that man ever said revolted me immensely and I’m just glad that it’s over and that no word is ever going to escape his lips again. XD
”And shoot him in the forehead.
Once for Adam.
Once for Warner.”
So yeah, I loved the entire book and if there is one thing I didn’t like than it’s just the fact that the trilogy is over and that the ending was too fast. I would have liked to see more of the aftermath and I kind of hoped for some sort of epilogue, but considering the fact that Tahereh Mafi is going to write three other books I don’t feel the urge to complain! *lol*
All told, I highly recommend the “Shatter me” trilogy and if you haven’t read it already you definitely should!!!! ;-)
And last but not least: This was a buddy read with the awesome Megha and I was sooo damn glad I was able to talk about all those feels!!! Thanks a lot! You rock!!! XD
”You know,” he whispers, his lips at my ear, “the whole world will be coming for us now.”
I lean back. Look into his eyes.
“I can’t wait to watch them try.” ...more
Notes are private!
Jul 27, 2017
Aug 04, 2017
Jul 15, 2017
Feb 05, 2013
Feb 05, 2013
it was amazing
I can’t. I just can’t deal with all those feels!!!
I finished reading this book about two days ago, yet my feelings are still too muddled and my mind i I can’t. I just can’t deal with all those feels!!!
I finished reading this book about two days ago, yet my feelings are still too muddled and my mind is spinning and I just can’t seem to be able to think straight. XD
I swear that book killed me and if Mafi’s third book “Ignite Me” is going to be as good as this one - I seriously don’t even dare to think that it might be even better - it actually might be the death of me! *lol*
All I can do is to try to write a halfway coherent review of “Unravel Me” and considering all the feelings and the emotional rollercoaster I went through “to try” actually seems to be the right choice of words.
I loved that book! I loved it so much I decided to buy the entire “Shatter Me” series in paperback just so I can mark all my favourite moments!! *lol* Okay admittedly most of them will be Warner moments but then again that boy is A.W.E.S.O.M.E.N.E.S.S on two legs! No doubt, you know exactly what I mean! *wriggles eyebrows*
Anyway you wanted a review and I promise I’ll try my very best to give it to you! So yeah, we better get this started right?
The storyline begins with Juliette’s life at Omega Point and her constant struggle to become a part of the community. Knowing our young heroine it’s not all too hard to guess that she’s doing a rather awful job at adapting to her new circumstances and even though Adam tries his best to keep her grounded things unfortunately aren’t as easy as they seem to be. If I would have to sum it up I’d say that plot-wise there actually doesn’t happen a lot. Mostly because the rebels are just hiding at Omega Point and try to prepare for war. Considering the love story, there happens so much that you barely get a chance to breathe though. So yeah if you’re a sucker for love stories this book will tear you apart and scatter your remains in all four cardinal directions. If you’re not into YA love stories, teen angst and heart palpitations I’d not only advise you to give this book a wide berth but also would suggest to read another book of your - no doubt long - “to be read” list! ;-P
WARNING will contain spoilers and many quotes! XD
I loved how much she has grown in this book. At the beginning of “Shatter me” she was so insecure and frail, already scratching her sentences before she even got a proper chance to think them to an end. Now she has so many different thoughts that she can barely contain them, constantly thinking about everything that’s happening, second-guessing her own decisions, second-guessing other people’s decisions, second-guessing her relationships with Adam and Warner. It was refreshing to see that she’s finally beginning to think about the things she wants and that she actually realised that not everything is black and white. Especially not Warner! *lol* ;-)
“I took what I wanted. I knew better and I took it anyway. Adam couldn’t have known, he could never have known what it would be like to really suffer at my hands. He was innocent of the depth of it, of the cruel reality of it. He’d only felt bursts of my power, according to Castle. He’d only felt small stabs of it and was able and aware enough to let go without feeling the full effects.
But I knew better.
I knew what I was capable of.”
“I think about glasses half full and glasses to see the world clearly. I think about sacrifice. And compromise. I think about what will happen if no one fights back. I think about a world where no one stands up to injustice.
And I wonder if maybe everyone here is right.
If maybe it’s time to fight.”
“Maybe it’s because he’s broken and I’m foolish enough to think I can fix him. Maybe it’s because I see myself, I see 3, 4, 5, 6, 17-year-old Juliette abandoned, neglected, mistreated, abused for something out-side of her control and I think of Warner as someone who’s just like me, someone who was never given a chance in life.”
“All I know is that it’ll never be safe for me to rely on someone else again, to need constant reassurance of who I am and who I might someday be. I can love him, but I can’t depend on him to be my backbone. I can’t be my own person if I constantly require someone else to hold me together.”
Meh, I don’t know! While I really liked him in the first book and even kind of shipped him with Juliette, my sympathy for him now seems to have vanished. I understand that he hates Warner and that he desperately wants to be with Juliette. His actions and the way he deals with things definitely don’t get my approval though. I mean he could have easily saved them a lot of heartbreak if he just would have been honest to his girl and he’s so blinded by his love for Juliette and his hatred for Warner that he doesn’t even try to understand their point of view. I’m not saying that he should be all like “we’re one big happy family” but I really would have wished that he would have paused for a moment and would have used his brain! *lol* There are damn good reasons why Juliette decided to steer clear of him and I’m sure that if he would have given her some space and time, she probably might have even reconsidered her decision. I mean it’s obvious she loves him but with his actions he’s just pushing her away.
“How is it possible,” he says, “that I’m this close to you and it’s killing me that you’re still so far away?”
“Because it takes a lot more than blood to be family,” he says. “And I want nothing to do with him. I’d like to be able to watch him die and feel no sympathy, no remorse. He’s the textbook definition of a monster,” Adam says to me. “Just like my dad. And I’ll drop dead before I recognize him as my brother.”
“He’s a vision of emerald and onyx, silhouetted in the sunlight in the most deceiving way. He could be glowing. That could be a halo around his head. This could be the world’s way of making an example out of irony. Because Warner is beautiful in ways even Adam isn’t.”
All good things come in threes, right? XD I already said it and I say it again: Warner is just amazing! I still love this boy and he’s easily become one of my all-time favourite book boyfriends!!! I probably could gush forever and still wouldn’t be able to put everything into words so I’ll just try my best to form coherent sentences that might be interrupted by high-pitched girl squees! *LOL* Just to let you know and warn you in advance! ;-P
Okay, here we go! Warner is probably one of the most complex characters I ever had the pleasure to encounter and believe me I read so many YA books that this actually means something!!! XD Over the course of the book he’s actually a prisoner at Omega Point, but since Juliette and Warner seem to have a “special connection” Castle just decided to assign her to interrogate him. There were so many scenes I loved and even though I can’t seem to be able to choose, Chapter 45 and Chapter 62 literally, I mean LITERALLY caused me to whimper!!! I had to read those two chapters twice because I was so overwhelmed I couldn’t even… Jeez I still can’t process it!!!
(view spoiler)[“ I told you I hated you.”
“Yes,” he says. He nods. “Well You’d be surprised how many people say that to me.”
“I don’t think I would.”
His lips twitch. “You tried to kill me.”
“That amuses you.”
“Oh, yes,” he says, his grin growing. “I find it fascinating.” A pause. “Would you like to know why?”
I stare at him.
“Because all you ever said to me,” he explains, “ was that you didn’t want to hurt anyone. You didn’t want to murder people.”
“Except for me?”
I’m all out of letters. Fresh out of words. Someone has robbed me of my entire vocabulary.
“That decision was so easy for you to make,” he says. “So simple. You had a gun. You wanted to run away. You pulled the trigger. That was it.”
In case you wondered why this is a spoiler! Because for me it's exactly the moment in which everything changes! ;-) (hide spoiler)]
I love everything about Warner, his honesty, his sweet words, his gentleness when he’s with Juliette, his anger and defiance when he’s around all the others, his broken heart, his fear, his insecurity, his self-confidence, his insolence, his intensity, his cheekiness, how he was able to quote Juliette’s journal, his protectiveness, his bravery his tattoos!!! (OH MY GOD HIS TATTOOS), his thoughts, his mind, his cleverness, his laughter…. See what I’m talking about?! XD
“Finding this,” he says, his voice soft as he pats the cover of my notebook, “was so” – his eyebrows pull together – “it was so extraordinarily painful.”
Let’s just say it and be done with it: I am Aaron Warner trash through and through and if Juliette doesn’t take him I’ll have absolutely no qualms to snatch him away from her! *LOL*
“He stands there, bearing the pain, blinking fast, jaw so tight, staring at his father with absolutely no emotion on his face; there’s no indication he’s just been slapped but the bright red mark across his cheek, his temple, and part of his forehead. But his arm sling is more blood than cotton now, and he looks far too ill to be on his feet.
Still he says nothing.”
“Do you know,” he says, closing the cover of the journal only to lay his hand on top of it. Protecting it. Staring at it. “I couldn’t sleep for days after I read that entry. I kept wanting to know which people were chasing you down the street, who it was you were running from. I wanted to find them,” he says, so softly, “and I wanted to rip their limbs off, one by one. I wanted to murder them in ways that would horrify you to hear.”“
“I want to be the friend you fall hopelessly in love with. The one you take into your arms and into your bed and into the private world you keep trapped in your head. I want to be that kind of friend,” he says. “The one who will memorize the things you say as well as the shape of your lips when you say them. I want to know every curve, every freckle, every shiver of your body, Juliette – “
He says “Please don’t shoot me for this.”
And he kisses me.
“ The truth,” he says, “is a painful reminder of why I prefer to live among the lies.”
I really like that he’s kind of become Juliette’s best friend and as a side character that boy really never fails to lighten up the mood. He’s funny and hilarious but at least after chapter 10 we realise that he can be more than just intense as well. XD That boy knows exactly what he’s doing and his mind definitely is at least as sharp as Warner’s. ;-P
“I shake my head, try to bite back my amusement. Kenji is a walking paradox of Unflinchingly Serious Person and 12-Year-Old Boy Going Through Puberty all rolled into one.”
I turn to face him. “Listen, I’m grateful you’re going to help me train now – really I am. Thank you for that. But you can’t go around proclaiming your fake love for me – especially not in front of Adam – and you have to let me cross this room before the breakfast hour is over, okay? I hardly ever get to see him.”
Kenji nods very slowly, looks a little solemn. “You’re right. I’m sorry. I get it.”
“Adam is jealous of our love.”
“Yeah, bro.” Kenji puts his utensils down. “You are moody. It’s always ‘Shut up, Kenji.’ ‘Go to sleep, Kenji.’ No one wants to see you naked, Kenji.” When I know for a fact that there are thousands of people who would love to see me naked – “
I hate him!!! I loathe him and I really wish that someone would finally put a stop to his cruel games! That man is just despicable and neither Adam, nor Warner nor James deserve a father like that!!!! I really hope the Reestablishment and Anderson fall together and that said I just can’t wait to read the next book! ;-P
“But then,” he says, laughing a little, “just as I began drafting my plans, my son came to me and begged me not to kill you. Just you.” He stops. Looks up. “He actually begged me not to kill you.” Laughs again. “It was just as pathetic as it was surprising.”
“Anderson’s gun is no longer pointed at me. He forgets me long enough to press the barrel of his gun into Warner’s forehead, twisting it, jabbing it against his skin as he speaks.”
Oh well, as it seems my review finally has come to an end! *lol*
For everyone that actually managed to read until now:
Thank you! I really hope you enjoyed my review and I’d be glad if you’d stay tuned for my thoughts about “Ignite me”. ;-P
And before I forget: This was a buddy read with Megha!!!
We're going to rock "Ignite me" as well! ;-) ...more
Notes are private!
Jul 17, 2017
Jul 27, 2017
Jul 15, 2017
Sep 24, 2013
Sep 24, 2013
it was amazing
”Someone could call themselves a hero and still walk around killing dozens. Someone else could be labelled a villain for trying to stop them. Plenty o ”Someone could call themselves a hero and still walk around killing dozens. Someone else could be labelled a villain for trying to stop them. Plenty of humans were monstrous, and plenty of monsters knew how to play at being human.”
(Just in case you actually want to read my full review. *lol* You can read it here!)
This is easily one of the best books I’ve read in 2019 and that’s quite something, because I already read so many other awesome books this year. To give “Vicious” 5 stars was a no-brainer though and I’m very glad that my reading buddy saw it the same way. As it seems we were both hooked right from the beginning and the longer we read, the more we immersed ourselves in the story.
I thought long and hard about the many reasons I liked this so much and I think it’s mostly due to the way it was written. V.E. Schwab made her story some sort of puzzle and the longer you read, the more is revealed and every piece eventually falls into place. It wasn’t until I started to write down a few of the quotes that I finally realized why I could relate to her writing style so much. XD It felt like reading one of my forum role-play games. *lol*
Let me explain a little bit more: There are people that will write short posts that cover the basics and then there are people that will write an entire character with its background story and play it out in 900 – 1.000 word posts that stretch over the course of years, sometimes even decades. Yes, you already guessed right, I’m the latter one. ;-P And so it’s no surprise I was intrigued by V.E. Schwab’s handiwork.
There’s a certain depth to her characters you never actually see on the pages, but it’s all there, in their actions, the way they behave. In the way they talk and interact with each other. There’s an entire background story and we get it piece by piece, little by little, but never all of it and to say I was captivated by this would be the understatement of the century. XD I lived and breathed for it, I tasted blood and I crave for more!!! <3
Next time I’m at the library I’m going to pre-order “Vengeful” and if it’s only half as good as “Vicious” I shall be more than just fine! ;-) This said, I’ll go right into my character’s section because damn, there’s a lot to discuss! XD
Welcome to my spoilery spoiler section! Take a seat, make yourself comfortable and enjoy the show! Be warned though, I’m at least as fierce as Victor when it comes to book characters and just like him I won’t sugar-coat things and spoil you not only thoroughly but also relentlessly! ;-P
Eli Cardale (Ever):
”Well, when you wonder something,” said Eli, “doesn’t that mean part of you wants to believe in it? I think we want to prove things, in life, more than we want to disprove them. We want to believe.”
I didn’t like Eli which actually made him the perfect villain. *lol* The funny thing is that I’m pretty certain he’s more human and compassionate than Victor, yet this also seems to be the main reason why he’s worse than him. Am I already confusing you? XD Okay, let me put it this way, whilst Victor’s analytical mind controls his actions the same can’t be said about Eli. When the shit hits the fan Eli is following his gut feeling and because he believes he’s doing the right thing he goes through with it and never second guesses his decisions. I’d even go as far as to say that Eli is some sort of religious fanatic and that he sanctions his actions by his belief. And what is more human and more powerful than people’s beliefs? There are centuries of history that prove how many bad things have been done in the name of religion and Eli’s character is some kind of embodiment of it. He lives by his principles and this doesn’t only make him a very dangerous man, it also makes him very human. Eli is on a mission and everyone who interferes with it will be the next victim on his Ever-growing list. ;-) (see what I did there?! *lol*)
”On the surface, Eli seemed perfectly normal, but now and then Victor would catch a crack, a sideways glance, a moment when his roommate’s face and his words, his look and his meaning, would not line up. Those fleeting slices fascinated Victor. It was like watching two people, one hiding in the other’s skin. And their skin was always too dry, on the verge of cracking and showing the color of the thing beneath.”
”A hero. Wasn’t he? Heroes saved the world from villains, from evil. Heroes sacrificed themselves to do it. Was he not bloodying his hands and his soul to set the world right? Did he not sacrifice himself every time he stripped away an EO’s stolen life?”
”I died begging for the strength to survive, and it was granted. But it’s a trade, Professor, with God or the devil, and I’ve paid for my gift with the lives of my friends. Every EO has sold a part of themselves they can never have back. Don’t you see?” He knelt beside Lyne, whose fingers twitched. “I can’t let anyone else sin so heinously against nature.”
”She watched him as he worked, his touch impossibly light, as if he was afraid of breaking her. Everything about him was light – his skin, his hair, his eyes, his hands as they danced through the air above her skin, touching her only when absolutely necessary.”
I absolutely ADORED AND LOVED Victor Vale!!! <333 What an intriguing and morally grey character! I just loved the way he thought! His analytical and cunning mind was everything I ever craved for and even more and I just couldn’t get enough of his character. I loved that he was so unapologetic and that he knew exactly who he was. Yes, he tried to blend in with the others, but he never claimed to be something that he wasn’t. If you ask me I’d say Victor is a psychopath, at least if you consider all the typical signs of it. Then again Eli certainly was one too. He might have been more empathic than Victor but whilst Vic knew what was expected of him, Eli ultimately seemed more inclined to ignore human morals than to follow them. I loved how Victor questioned his actions, how he paused to think if what he did was right or wrong, how he weighted both sides against each other and then eventually decided to do what his logic told him. He was vicious and brutal, but he could also be gentle and caring and boy, did I live for that moral ambiguity. *lol*
”The paper called Eli a hero.
The word made Victor laugh. Not just because it was absurd, but because it posed a question. If Eli really was a hero, and Victor meant to stop him, did that make him a villain?
He took a sip of his drink, tipped his head back against the couch, and decided he could live with that.”
”Victor watched his friend, mesmerized by the transformation. He himself could mimic most emotions and pass them off as his, but mimicking only went so far, and he knew he could never match this … fervor.”
”You can’t kill me, Victor,” said Eli. “You know that.”
Victor’s smile widened as he buried his knife between Eli’s ribs.
“I know,” he said loudly. He had to speak up over the screams. “But you’ll have to indulge me. I’ve waited so long to try.”
”That’s what Sydney was giving these people. A second chance.
Her fingers hovered over the dead man’s chest for a moment as she wondered if he deserved a second chance, then chided herself. Who was she to judge or decide or grant or deny? Simply because she could, did that mean she should?”
Poor little Sydney! I felt so sorry for her! She didn’t choose to have a power like that but she was hunted for it nevertheless. I found it interesting that she was so young but already asked herself the right questions. In some way that made her a good counterweight to Victor and Eli. I mean there is this powerful girl and she has no idea what she can do with her abilities or what she’s capable of. She was a very strong character though and I loved her for her defiance. <3 It takes guts to live with a man like Victor and she might have questioned his actions but she was never afraid of him. XD
”She looked at Victor’s profile one last time, and tried to picture the man who had once been Eli’s friend, who had brought him back, made him what he was, saved her sister … and for a moment, as she finished dialing Eli’s number, she almost wished he stood a fighting chance.”
Now Serena was a character that caused me to think long and hard as well. On the one hand I liked her for standing up to Eli by charming him to do her will, and on the other hand I disliked her for helping him to find and eliminate his targets. If she was so good at compelling people why didn’t she try to stop Eli for good? She played him, yet at the same time she did what he wanted her to do. Why? Did she really think that this was the only way to save her own skin? Did she truly believe that EO’s are dangerous and that they deserve to die? Her character posed so many questions and to my chagrin none of them were answered. >_< She definitely had one of the best scenes in this book though. The moment Victor killed her and quoted Ulysses was priceless!! <3
The relationships & ships:
Victor & Eli:
”You asked me if I ever wanted to believe in something. I do. I want to believe in this. I want to believe that there’s more.” Victor sloshed a touch of whiskey over the edge of his glass. “That we could be more. Hell, we could be heroes.”
“We could be dead,” said Eli.
“That’s a risk everyone takes by living.”
Ohh those two gave me a lot to wonder about. I’m convinced Victor was in love with Eli and that this was the reason why he wanted his revenge so badly. I mean he was betrayed by the person he loved and to make it even worse Eli didn’t even bother to hear him out. He didn’t give him the benefit of the doubt, no, he ratted him out to the police the moment he knew his girlfriend had died. It was like Eli always expected Victor to go off the rails and only waited for an opportunity to turn on him. Funnily enough it turned out that Eli was the one that actually went off the rails in the end. After all Eli’s girlfriend was the only person Victor killed and this was by accident and not intentional. The same certainly couldn’t be said for Eli though. He killed his victims on purpose and went after them with a vengeance. Sure, once Victor got out of prison his death tally went up as well, he never killed without a purpose or reason though. Which is the main difference between those two. Victor always considered the pros and cons while Eli acted as judge and executioner and didn’t even give his victims a chance to defend themselves, let alone to speak. Now that Eli is in prison I can’t help but wonder what’s going to happen next. I guess I’ll find out once I get my hands on a copy of “Vengeful”. ;-P
”He and Eli were bonded, by blood and death and science. They were alike, more so now than ever. And he had missed Eli. He wanted to see him. And he wanted to see him suffer. He wanted to see the look in Eli’s eyes when he lit them up with pain. He wanted his attention. Eli was like a thorn beneath Victor’s skin, and it hurt. He could turn off every nerve in his body, but Victor couldn’t do a damned thing about the twinge he felt when he thought of Cardale.”
”I don’t want to see Serena,” said Sydney.
“I know,” said Victor. “But I want to see Eli.”
“Why?” she asked. “You can’t kill him.”
“That may be.” His fingers curled around the shovel. “But half the fun is trying.”
Sydney & Victor:
”I’m cold,” she said.
“I’m Victor,” he said, and she offered him a small, exhausted flicker of a smile.
Their relationship was so precious! <3 Victor became some sort of father figure for Sydney and even though she knew that he had a bad moral compass she still trusted him and felt safe with Victor. I loved that he was always so honest with her and didn’t even try to sugar-coat things. He gave her room to come to her own conclusions and he provided a safe environment to live in. In some way that made him an amazing father even though he certainly wasn’t the best choice to raise a kid like her. *lol* Still, those two worked because Sydney acted as some sort of conscience for him and that ultimately made him a better person. XD I wonder if their relationship is going to change after she brought him back from the dead and if yes in which direction it’s going to head. Oh and I just realized that Vic joined Eli in not being able to age. ;-)
”Sydney, look at me.” He rested his hands on the car roof and leaned in. “No one is going to hurt you. Do you know why?” She shook her head, and Victor smiled. “Because I’ll hurt them first.”
”Serena hadn’t told Sydney to go home. She hadn’t told her to run away. She’d told her to go somewhere safe. And over the course of the last week, safe had ceased to be a place for Sydney, and had become a person.
Specifically, safe had become Victor.”
Serena & Eli:
”She pulled away enough to hold him with her cold blue eyes. He could see the devil in them, silver-tongued and cunning, and Eli thought, not for the first time, that he should have killed her when he had the chance.”
Serena and Eli had one of the most abusive relationships I ever witnessed. They both abused each other in equal measure and this was weirdly fascinating. Their dynamic was crazy and they both didn’t hesitate to use their powers in order to get what they wanted. I think in some way they even loved each other, yet they both couldn’t change the way they were. Eli craved to kill Serena but was fascinated by her and Serena wanted to stay alive but couldn’t seem to be able to turn away from Eli. What a stalemate. XD Wicked faerie tongues (like mine) would say Victor relieved them from the trouble of killing each other and they might be right. *lol*
I loved this and I could kick myself for not reading it sooner! “Vicious” was the amazing start of a compelling story and I can’t wait to read its sequel “Vengeful”. Morally grey characters, a captivating storyline and the omnipresent question of what is right and what is wrong made this a truly thrilling journey! I don’t know about you, but I want more! ;-)
Last but not least I want to thank Mr. Babygreys for another great buddy read! It’s always a pleasure to read books with you and I’m glad our reading habits and preferences are so similar. *lol* We seem to be on a roll, let’s keep those books coming! ;-P ...more
Notes are private!
Jul 15, 2019
Aug 08, 2019
Jul 13, 2017
Oct 20, 2015
Nov 01, 2015
it was amazing
”You picked a hell of a day to dump me, Kades.”
I swear the interviews with those two at the beginning of the book are certainly among the best introdu ”You picked a hell of a day to dump me, Kades.”
I swear the interviews with those two at the beginning of the book are certainly among the best introductions to a new series I ever read. I mean OMG!!!
I’m still not over it!! I swear when I started to read it I really didn’t know a lot about “Illuminae”. There were only three things I knew and I had absolutely no idea how it would work out for me.
1.) It’s a sci-fi series.
2.) The format is kinda weird and apparently the audio book is the shit!
3.) The hype around it is so real that it’s almost a physical thing.
Well, enough reasons to pick up the book and to give it a try, right? If only I would have known what I was signing up to. *lol* Nothing, really NOTHING prepared me for the things that were about to come. I was totally swept away by this book and its events and yet… yet there were many typical tropes I already read about a thousand times.
BUT tell you what?! It worked!!! And damn did it work!!! I dunno how Jay Kristoff and Amie Kaufmann did it but this was so, so, SO GOOD!!! The suspense was killing me and whenever I had to stop to read all I wanted to do was to continue. I mean a virus outbreak in one of the ships… My first reaction was “Been there, done that, got the freaking t-shirt”, but WOW once you dive into the story, once you get used to the format it’s almost like you’re actually there, like you’re fighting alongside Ezra and Kady and this was just awesome!
”The victim often seeks physical comfort (hand holding, embraces), ultimately increasing the chances of spreading infection. It’s genius, really. Awful, horrifying genius.”
I think you can already tell that I’m struggling for words. It’s so hard to put this experience into coherent sentences! All I can say is that this book is swallowing you whole and then spits you out at the most crucial point. And there were plot twists!!! JEEZ!! Were there plot twists! The kind of plot twists that turn your entire world upside down and leave you gasping on the ground!
The best thing about the entire book were the characters though. They made it all so authentic and realistic and I found myself hoping they would make it while I sent prayers into thin air. Which should give you a good impression about how attached I got to them. Plus I had a crush on all three of them! I love Kady and Ezra and I ADORE, I ABSOLUTELY ADORE AND LOVE AIDAN!!!! <3333
And their conversations! Their humour and easy banter, the bitter truth that was hidden within it so casually. This was nothing but awesome! Let me introduce those three!
Beware! You’re entering my characters section now and there might be spoilers ahead of you. Either you rearrange your course or you head straight into unknown non-terrestrial territory. ;-P
”That’s so not your business it almost punches clean past the event horizon of Not Your Business and becomes Your Business again.”
Haha! Oh gosh, I loved him from the very first moment I read about him. This boy was such a precious snowflake and he had a mouth on him! *LOL* I lived and breathed for the moments he appeared. He was really such a sweet guy and behind all the cussing and swearing he was a real romantic! <3 I can understand why he loved Kady and their relationship was amazing. They were friends and lovers and all I wanted for them was to be happy and to see each other again.
”Okay, well for the benefit of the sight-impaired, I am now raising my … oh, dear… yes, it’s my middle finger at Mr. Postgrad here.”
”All he thinks of amid this loveless dance, all he cares about here on the edge of forever, is HER. He does not want to die. Not because he is afraid. Simply because he cannot bear the thought of leaving her behind. And there, in that tiny moment, I envy him.”
”If I lose Ezra too, it’ll be one body blow too many.
If I lose Ezra too, I’ll give up.
I don’t think I have anyone else left.
But while I have him, I’ll fight tooth and nail to keep us safe. Whatever it takes.”
Kady! *sighs deeply* Wow! Just wow! I rarely read about such a fierce heroine and despite being so small she was so brave and A.M.A.Z.I.N.G!!! I mean she literally took it up with the entire world and nothing, really nothing that happened ever managed to get her down! She got up time and again and she never stopped fighting! That inner strength and iron will! *whistles* I guess I was a goner the moment she appeared in the book. <333 I love my precious girl and she needs to be protected at all costs! (She’d probably kick my behind for that statement though. *lol*)
”She is a tief. A whisper.
Melting through curtains of code and shadow
Like a knife through black water.
”ByteMe: see u soon
ByteMe: or die trying
”And now, with no other option,
They have turned to me.
Plucked me back from the black they left me in.
Thinking I will save them.”
And here comes the character I truly loved the most! AIDAN the AI!!! Yes, you read right! I absolutely loved and adored AIDAN!!! GAH! I worship AIDAN! I’m utterly and deeply in love with him/her/it! I carry a torch for AIDAN! I’m so besotted with this AI, it’s not even normal anymore! *lol* AIDAN was such a deep character and so very, very human! This AI had such a beautiful soul! I loved every single word he/she/it thought and said. And I really dunno what this says about me. *lol* My buddy and I even wondered if this makes me AI-phile or robo-phile?! XD Is there even a word for the state of falling in love with an AI? I can’t even tell you what made me fall head-over-heels for AIDAN but I guess it was the amazing mixture of a morally grey character that only wants the best for his people but choses the wrong means to achieve that goal. All I know is that I love AIDAN and that I really, really hope to see more of him in the next book! <333
Funnily enough I read the interview with Amie and Jay at the end of the book and Jay explained his feelings about AIDAN like that: ”I think it’s the deepest character I’ve ever written, which is odd considering it’s a machine. I dunno what it says about me that the mass-murdering artificial intelligence affected me the most. Nothing good, probably.”
Haha! I can relate to that statement so much! SAME, Jay! SAME! XD
”Perhaps bravery is simply the face humanity wraps around its collective madness.”
”Before this moment, I have never wished
To be something other than what I am.
Never felt so keenly the lack of hands with which to
Touch, the lack of arms with which to hold.”
”How many people have loved only to have lost?
How countless, the hopes that have died?”
I loved this book with every fibre of my heart. There was never a dull moment; I was constantly on the edge of my seat and I bit my thumbnail about a thousand times. *lol* If there ever was a definition of suspense you’d probably find a picture of “Illuminae” next to the word in the dictionary. Yes, it was that good! ;-) If you’re still hesitating to read this book just because of the strange format: Just pick it up! Read it! Feel it! Get swept away in the tide and enjoy that freaky outer space ride! You won’t regret it! XD
And last but not least I want to thank my witchling for that super amazing buddy read! We’re one of the best buddy read teams ever and I can’t wait to dive into “Gemina” with you! I enjoyed this br so much! It was a lot of fun to guess the outcome of the ending and to wonder about what would happen next and I’m so glad we decided to read this together! To another hundred buddy reads with you. ;-P (Did you really think I’d let you off the hook?! *lol*) ...more
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Feb 16, 2019
Jul 12, 2017
Sep 29, 2015
Sep 29, 2015
it was amazing
How to begin this review?
How to put into words how much I loved these characters and this book?
How am I supposed to write down all those many feels? How to begin this review?
How to put into words how much I loved these characters and this book?
How am I supposed to write down all those many feels?
And most importantly,
How can I live with this ache in my chest?
I have no answer to all of those questions, but I know that I have to write this review!
So here I go!
Let’s hope my voice doesn’t falter and pray that my words don’t fail.
“The heart is an arrow. It demands aim to land true.”
When I first read about “Six of Crows” I thought that it would be a fun read. You know one of those books that are easy to read and make you laugh. I expected to read a story that was able to enthral me. A story I would enjoy and classify as intriguing.
“Six of Crows” was all of that and yet it was so much more!!!
I was not prepared to fall in love with all of those beautiful characters and I certainly didn’t expect to be so affected by their lives and background stories. Every single one of those six individuals touched my heart and I know that “Six of Crows” actually is supposed to be a story about a dangerous heist and an adventure. To me it was so much more than that though. It was a story about life and hate and the choices that we make. It was a tale about the people and experiences that shape us. But most of all it actually was a secret and subtle homage to love.
I can’t even put into words how much Leigh Bardugo’s book moved me, but I can tell you that “Six of Crows” is brilliantly written and left me longing for more!
Now that I got this off my chest I’m finally able to write the actual review and since you all know me you also know what to expect. ;-)
Kaz Brekker is the right-hand man of the leader of the Dregs, one of the many gangs that live in the Barrel territory of Ketterdam and try their best to get by. One day a merchant named Van Eck offers him an obscene amount of money he can’t refuse and this is exactly the moment when everything gets into motion. To get this job done Kaz has to hire the best crew the Barrel has to offer and since they aren’t only supposed to break into the Ice Court but also aim to save a hostage, they actually got a lot of trouble ahead of them.
This is the moment where I take the liberty to inform you that the characters section is going to be full of spoilers. So yeah, tread carefully and don’t say I didn’t warn you. ;-P
And yet they hesitated. The knowledge that they might never see each other again, that some of them – maybe all of them – might not survive this night hung heavy in the air. A gambler, a convict, a wayward son, a lost Grisha, a Suli girl who had become a killer, a boy from the Barrel who had become something worse.
Kaz shook his head, dark hair glinting in the lamplight. He was a collection of hard lines and tailored edges – sharp jaw, lean build, wool coat snug across his shoulders.”
He is the brilliant leader of the crew and also known as “Dirtyhands” or “The bastard of the Barrel”! After reading the second chapter I was already in love with his sharp and intriguing mind and damn me but that boy’s intelligence is hot as hell!!! XD Alone his scheming face! *lol* I love characters that are driven and have some inner strength and Kaz definitely didn’t disappoint me. He’s so strong but vulnerable at the same time and I swear when I read about his past and saw how much he struggled my heart actually ached for him. It was so hard to watch him while he tried to keep his composure and whenever I read his POV it felt like his anxiety choked me. There is so much more to Kaz than initially meets the eye and I can’t believe that no one of his crew ever bothered to see past his disguise. Not even Inej…. *sigh*
”Sure of yourself, aren’t you, Brekker?”
“Myself and nothing else.”
”You might say I’m a lockpick.”
“You must be a very gifted one.”
“I am indeed.” Kaz leaned back slightly. “You see, every man is a safe, a vault of secrets and longings. Now, there are those who take the brute’s way, but I prefer a gentler approach – the right pressure applied at the right moment, in the right place. It’s a delicate thing.”
”It was because she was listening so closely that she knew the exact moment when Kaz Brekker, Dirtyhands, the bastard of the Barrel and the deadliest boy in Ketterdam, fainted.”
”Her eyes were so brown they were almost black, and for once her hair was down. She always wore it tied back in a ruthlessly tight coil. Even the idea of being this near someone should have set his skin crawling. Instad he thought, What happens if I move closer?”
Oh how much I liked this brave and calm girl. The “Wraith” was awesome and considering her past I really couldn’t help but had to admire her strength. Just like Kaz she also had secrets she didn’t want to share and whenever she came across Tante Heleen I was literally able to taste her fear. It was so painful to read what she’d gone through and what had happened to her but at the same time her courage kind of threw me. I mean there is this fragile little girl that was once one of Tante Heleen’s many subjects and even though she’s so young and small, she’s still a lethal weapon who’s able to kill even the strongest man. Inej is kick-ass and I loved her for it!!! XD
”Inej – “ said Kaz.
“Nina and I can get inside,” she continued. Her back was straight, her tone steady. She looked like someone facing the firing squad and saying damn the blindfolds. “We enter with the Menagerie.”
”It’s not natural for women to fight.”
“It’s not natural for someone to be as stupid as he is tall, and yet there you stand.”
Haha oh man, Matthias! What to say about him? He’s a huge and stupid brute but I still love him! *lol* I could understand why he was so angry at Nina and what bound him to his people but sometimes I just wanted to shake him for his stupidity! At the beginning of the book he was so ignorant and oblivious to his faults but the more I got to know him the more I could see why Nina fell for him. He’s one of those men that have a hard shell and a soft core and even though he has his flaws, he still always tried to do the right thing. I think his main problem was that he’d been indoctrinated to hate Grisha from a very young age and to me his struggle to overcome his prejudices was visible in every single sentence and line.
”It had started with a storm, and in a way, that storm had never ended. Nina had blown into his life with the wind and rain and set his world spinning. He’d been off balance ever since.”
Matthias pressed his forehead once, briefly, against Brum’s. He knew his mentor could not hear him, but he spoke the words anyway. “The life you live, the hate you feel – it’s poison. I can drink it no longer.”
You’re heavier than it says on this paper, I’ll wager.”
She shrugged artfully, the scales of her neckline slipping lower. “I like to eat when I’m in the mood,” she said, puckering her lips shamelessly. “And I’m always in the mood.”
God that woman is so fierce and has the heart of a lion!!! Nina is so compassionate and lovely and I immediately loved her for it! She’s never afraid to say what she’s thinking and she’s loyal to a fault. I just adored her for being so passionate and I was so sad when Matthias rejected her at the beginning. Not that this would have had any visible impact on her, after all she still had a sharp tongue and made sure to use it. *lol* ;-P Judging by what I read about this world to be one of the Grisha isn’t easy, but Nina nevertheless always somehow managed to stand her ground!
“Do not bend," Nina snapped. "Do not leap. Do not move abruptly. If you don't promise to take it easy, I'll slow your heart and keep you in a coma until I can be sure you've recovered fully."
"Nina Zenik, as soon as I figure out where you've put my knifes, we're going to have words."
"The first ones had better be 'Thank you, oh great Nina, for dedicating every waking moment of this miserable journey to saving my sorry life'."
“Now it was risk filling up his nose and mouth, making him feel giddy and invincible. He loved it, and he hated himself for loving it.
He’s the cocky smartass of the group and his comments always made me laugh. I loved the way he tried to ease the tension and how he worked as a buffer between all those different characters. I’m pretty sure if the crew wouldn’t have had the sharpshooter they might have been at each other’s throats in an instant and I’m really thankful Bardugo added him to the crew. I didn’t expect him to be a Grisha though and when I found out I was genuinely surprised. I think one day his countless vices will get him in deep trouble and I really hope that we’ll get to know him even better in the next book.
”You guys are going to make this really fun, aren’t you?” asked Jesper. “Usually people don’t start hating each other until a week into the job, but you two have a head start.”
They cast him twin glares, and Jesper beamed back at them, but Kaz’s attention was focused on the plans.
”They hadn’t even left Ketterdam, and Wylan already seemed completely out of his depth. He wasn’t much younger than Kaz, but somehow looked like a child – smooth-skinned, wide-eyed, like a silk-eared puppy in a room full of fighting dogs.”
This boy was the cutest thing ever! He’s such an adorable and innocent cinnamon roll!!! I instantly fell in love with Wylan and I’m already afraid to find out more about his past. The relationship with his father was more than just tense and I’m convinced there happened something bad that caused him to move out of his father’s house. It broke my heart when I found out that he seems to be illiterate and that his mean idiot of a father mocked him with it. =( And *lol* for someone who’s as innocent as Wylan to keep up with the crew actually was a hell of an accomplishment! Let’s take a second and appreciate this awesome, clever, courageous and smart boy!!! =)))
”I’m good at demo.”
“You’re passable at demo. You’re excellent at hostage.”
We’re not going in through the embassy,” said Kaz. “Always hit where the mark isn’t looking.”
“Who’s Mark?” asked Wylan.
Nina & Matthias:
”A good time needn’t involve wine and … and flesh,” Matthias sputtered.
Nina batted her glossy lashes at him. “You wouldn’t know a good time if it sidled up to you and stuck a lollipop in your mouth.
Those two gave me a serious headache!!! I knew they both loved each other but Matthias vehemently refused to acknowledge his feelings for Nina and it almost drove me insane! *lol* There were moments when I was tempted to throw the book against a wall and swore that I would hate Matthias forever, but then there were also those secret admissions to his true feelings and they kind of outweighed everything else. I have to admit that I also loved the way how Nina and Matthias pushed each other and them playing cat and mouse was just so much fun to hold it against them. XD But oh my god that scene at the end when Matthias took Nina’s hand? Gosh it made me cry and smile at the same time…
”And what did you do, Matthias? What did you do to me in your dreams?”
The ship listed gently. The laterns swayed. His eyes were blue fire. “Everything,” he said, as he turned to go. “Everything.”
He took her hand and kissed her knuckles genly. She winced, but when he tried to pull away, she clutched him tighter.
“Stay,” she panted. Tears leaked from her eyes. “Stay till the end.”
“And after,” he said. “And always.”
“I want to feel safe again. I want to go home to Ravka.”
“Then I’ll take you there. We’ll set fire to raisins or whatever you heathens do for fun.”
“Zealot,” she said weakly.
“Nina,” he whispered, “little red bird. Don’t go.”
Kaz & Inej:
”Keep talking, Wraith. Don’t slip away from me.”
“But it’s what I do best.”
They killed me! Their love was so bittersweet that it sometimes even caused me to stop breathing. Their emotions were so intense and gentle and yet their circumstances made it impossible to be together. I know everyone is blaming Kaz for holding back and turning Inej down but I can’t bring myself to be angry at him. Not after I saw his struggle and know what he’s been through. To touch other people is pure torture for him, yet he still let Inej reach out to him. It cost him so much just to stand there and let her caress his cheek, but he did it because he actually truly loves her!!! Gosh! Kaz and his fear to be touched killed me and the knowledge Inej didn’t understand his inner conflict actually shattered my heart! I can’t …. Argh I just can’t seem to be able to put into words how much this destroyed me!!! It put my heart through the meat grinder and shredded it into thousand tiny pieces…. It caused me to swallow, it made me gasp for air, it simply wrenched my breath away… It caused me to feel a pang in the center of my chest and my heart is still bleeding… Especially now that they took Inej!!!
”Kaz tumbled through the dark. He was colder than he’d ever been. He thought of Inej’s hand on his cheek. His mind had gone jagged at the sensation, a riot of confusion. It had been terror and disgust and – in all of that clamour - desire, a wish that lingered still, the hope that she would touch him again.”
”She’d laughed, and if he could have bottled the sound and got drunk on it every night, he would have. It terrified him.”
”I can hear the change in Kaz’s breathing when he looks at you.”
“You … you can?”
“It catches every time, like he’s never seen you before.”
He took a deep breath. “I want you to stay. I want you to … I want you.”
“You want me.” She turned the words over. Gently, she squeezed his hand. “And how will you have me, Kaz?”
He looked at her then, eyes fierce, mouth set. It was the face he wore when he was fighting.
“How will you have me?” she repeated. “Fully clothed, gloves on, your head turned away so our lips can never touch?”
He released her hand, his shoulders bunching, his gaze angry and ashamed as he turned his face to the sea.
Maybe it was because his back was to her that she could finally speak the words. “I will have you without armour, Kaz Brekker. Or I will not have you at all.”
Jesper & Wylan:
”Close your eyes!”
“You can’t kiss me from down there, Wylan.”
I loved the slow development of their relationship. Jesper never missed a chance to tease Wylan and even though Wylan was so innocent and shy he still somehow managed to hit back at him! *lol* There were so many meaningful and short moments between those two boys and I really wanted to see that ship sail!!! Unfortunately their love story was just in the background and pretty one-sided because we never actually got a chance to read Wylan’s point of view! *lol* So yeah I hope there are some Wylan chapters in the next book and please, please, please let Wylan get back his beautiful and “stupid face”!! Haha I know it’s petty but Jesper wasn’t the only one that liked his face! *lol*
“Pull your shirt up over your mouth,” he told Wylan.
“Stop being dense. You’re cuter when you’re smart.”
Wylan’s cheeks went pink. He scowled and pulled his collar up.
”If only you could talk to girls in equations.”
There was a long silence, and then, eyes trained on the notch they’d created in the link, Wylan said, “Just girls?”
Jesper restrained a grin.”No. Not just girls.”
All things considered this book was amazing and beautifully written! It’s a piece of art that kept me captivated from the beginning to the very end and I think throughout this journey I actually became a part of the crew!
So to all of my fellow Dregs, this is the way my review finally ends:
”No mourners, no funerals.” ;-) ...more
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Jul 10, 2017
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Jul 08, 2017
Oct 10, 2000
Sep 09, 2003
it was amazing
Notes are private!
Jul 05, 2017
Mass Market Paperback
Jul 22, 1997
Jul 22, 1997
it was amazing
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Jul 05, 2017
Apr 16, 1996
it was amazing
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Jul 05, 2017
Sep 01, 2005
Sep 08, 2007
it was amazing
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Jul 04, 2017
Jul 16, 2005
Sep 16, 2006
it was amazing
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Jun 21, 2003
it was amazing
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Jul 04, 2017
Jul 08, 2000
Sep 01, 2014
it was amazing
“Differences of habit and language are nothing at all if our aims are identical and our hearts are open.”
So this quote kind of sums up what “Harry Pot “Differences of habit and language are nothing at all if our aims are identical and our hearts are open.”
So this quote kind of sums up what “Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire” was really about and I think it was cleverly done. ;-) As always there’s so much to talk about and I decided to continue with another of my “My thoughts about this book” reviews. For HP this seems to be the best solution because otherwise I’d end up writing 5.000 words essays and we all know that 1.) Goodreads won’t let me post them and 2.) No one would even want to read so much! *lol* So random thoughts it is!
1.) ”Death Eaters?” said Harry. “What are Death Eaters?”
“It’s what You-Know-Who’s supporters called themselves,” said Bill.
I found it really odd that the term “Death Eaters” was mentioned and explained for the very first time in here. I mean Voldemort and his Death Eaters are one of the first things that come to mind when you think about HP. I thought it would have been mentioned in one of the earlier books already, but nope, it really was the first mention. Knowing the Death Eaters will accompany us for the rest of the series this was kind of shocking. XD
2.) ”I shouted at you before you left!” Mrs Weasley said, starting to sob. “It’s all I’ve been thinking about! What if You-Know-Who had got you, and the last thing I ever said to you was that you didn’t get enough O.W.Ls? Oh, Fred... George...”
Mrs. Weasley is legit one of the best moms ever and you can feel her love for all of her kids including Hermione and Harry. So yes, this a Molly Weasley appreciation moment and I still think that she is one of the most underrated characters in the entire series! I love that woman! <3
3.) ”Twitchy little ferret, aren’t you, Malfoy?” said Hermione scathingly, and she, Harry and Ron went up the marble staircase laughing heartily.
Hermione clearly found her self-confidence and poise after “The Prisoner of Azkaban”. XD I loved how she always retorted comments that were thrown at her. She’s so smart it was a pleasure to see her stand up for herself! (and others) And yes, I admit it, just like Ron I wanted to hold the memory of Malfoy the bouncing little ferret in my mind. *lol*
4.) ”How are you supposed to defend yourself against something you’ve never seen? A wizard who’s about to put an illegal curse on you isn’t going to tell you what he’s about to do. He’s not going to do it nice and polite to your face. You need to be prepared.”
Ahh Mad-Eye Moody! As much as I agreed with a lot of the things he said, I also disagreed with a lot of the things he did. Does that even make sense? XD For me Mad-Eye is one of those super morally grey characters because he sometimes does bad things for “the greater good”. Then again his character is consistent too because as an Auror he saw what dark wizards are capable of and he’s totally right when he says that they won’t play nice and fair. Guess I’ll always feel conflicted about him.
5.) ”Neville, are you all right?” said Hermione.
“Oh, yes, I’m fine,” Neville gabbled, in the same unnaturally high voice. “Very interesting dinner – I mean lesson – what’s for eating?”
Neville will always break my heart. That poor boy deserved so much better than he got and I’ve such a soft spot for him. He’s another of those Hogwarts characters I really would have loved to read more about and no matter what people think: He is brave and a true Gryffindor! <3
6.) Snape looked coldly at Hermione, then said, “I see no difference.”
And here we have another reason why Snape can’t be redeemed. He’s just nasty and mean to his students and a real bully. No matter what happened in his past, he should know better than to let his students suffer for it. I still think that movie Snape is way nicer than book Snape and if you only know book Snape you know why I don’t like him. I might understand his reasons, but I still hate him. >_<
7.) ”Next second all the wind had been knocked out of him as the squealing elf hit him hard in the midriff, hugging him so tightly he thought his ribs would break.
“D-Dobby?” Harry gasped.
I love Dobby so much! <333 He’s such an adorable and sweet guy and it was so good to see him so happy! He’s probably the only house elf that appreciates his freedom but considering his former masters it’s no wonder he’s happy to do what he wants. *lol* Guess you’ve to experience the Malfoy’s as your masters to truly appreciate freedom. ;-P
8.) ”Oh, I see,” Hermione said, bristling. “So basically, you’re going to take the best-looking girl who’ll have you, even if she’s completely horrible?”
“Er – yeah, that sounds about right,” said Ron.
*sighs* I usually like Ron but I never liked his “Goblet of Fire” version and I still don’t. I mean yes, he’s a teenage boy who’s going through puberty but that doesn’t excuse the many horrible things he does and says in this one. To say it plainly he’s a total dumbass in GoF and I really don’t like him. At least in this book. First he doesn’t believe Harry and then he’s hurting Hermione whenever he opens his mouth, just because his teenage hormones apparently make it hard to think before he says something. We could blame it on puberty but I think there’s so much more going on... Luckily Hermione is clever enough to see through it.
9.) ”Only this morning, for instance, I took a wrong turning on the way to the bathroom and found myself in a beautifully proportioned room I have never seen before, containing a really rather magnificent collection of chamber pots. When I went back to investigate more closely, I discovered that the room had vanished.”
And here’s another breadcrumb that will be relevant in the next book. XD You gotta love how Rowling scatters them in the earlier books and makes use of them later on. ;-)
10.) ”If you really want to know, he – he said he’d been coming up to the library every day to try and talk to me, but he hadn’t been able to pluck up the courage!”
So after three books we dive right into the teenage drama and angst. Which is kind of suitable for their age but boy, did it impact their friendship in this one. I think from now on there’s no book in which they don’t have a conflict of some sort. No matter if it’s Ron/Harry or Hermione/Ron. There always seems to be something brewing between the trio. And bless Victor Krum for realizing how beautiful Hermione is! If none of the two boys at her side can see it, at least Victor can! I think he knows her value way more than her closest friends and I really appreciate him for it. =)
11.) ”Trying to ruin someone else’s life?” said Harry loudly.
Harry giving Rita Skeeter a piece of his mind is one of the best things in this book. That woman is horrible and she’ll only get even worse as the series proceeds. Harry’s got guts to confront her directly and I just love him for it.
12.) But Sirius shook his head and said. “She’s got the measure of Crouch better than you have, Ron. If you want to know what a man’s like, take a good look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals.”
And here’s another character I’d love to see more of! Sirius Black is one of the best and I loved how protective he’s of Harry! He’s like a lion protecting his pup and I lived and breathed for it. After everything Harry went through he deserves someone who loves him and stands up for him. Even if it’s against Dumbledore because he wants Harry to rest and feel better instead of recounting events. Sirius placing his hand on Harry’s shoulder and defending him against Dumbledore’s questions really made my day! Best guardian ever!
13.) ”Yes,” said Harry. “Professor – I was in Divination just now, and – er – I fell asleep.”
He hesitated here, wondering if a reprimand was coming, but Dumbledore merely said, “Quite understandable. Continue.”
Haha! As much as I disliked Dumbledore forcing Harry to relive that horrible night I still can’t help but love him for his attitude. He’s one of the best teachers ever and the fact he didn’t even bat an eye when Harry told him that he fell asleep in Divination. Priceless! *lol*
14.) (view spoiler)[ ”And as he heard Voldemort draw nearer still, he knew one thing only, and it was beyond fear or reason – he was not going to die crouching here like a child playing hide-and-seek; he was not going to die kneeling at Voldemort’s feet... he was going to die upright like his father, and he was going to die trying to defend himself, even if no defence was possible...”
I LOVE Harry so damn much, I can’t even! He’s one hell of a brave boy and I can’t even imagine how terrified he must have been. Yet he still refused to back down and didn’t give Voldemort the satisfaction of seeing him cower in front of him. This moment shows the true Gryffindor in him and why he got sorted into the house. When push comes to shove Harry always does the right and noble thing! <3 My precious boy! (hide spoiler)]
15.) (view spoiler)[ ”Harry, you can’t help him now. It’s over. Let go.”
“He wanted me to bring him back,” Harry muttered – it seemed important to explain this. “He wanted me to bring him back to his parents...”
“That’s right, Harry... just let go, now...”
This moment always makes me cry! Cedric Diggory’s death is one of the most heart-wrenching scenes in this series and it will always break my heart. No matter how often I read it, it’s still devastating. And Harry’s reaction to it, knowing that he could have been alive if he would have touched that portkey without him... It’s the first time that he has to live with the death of someone he knew and liked and it’s even worse because he feels guilty. What if he would have done the egoistic thing and won the tournament? What if he wouldn’t have offered Cedric to win together? For the first time ever his sense of fairness and his honour brought death to someone and his feelings are so complex I could cry. He did the right thing but it ended badly and left him devastated. If that’s not the symbolical embodiment of growing up then I don’t know. (hide spoiler)]
16.) (view spoiler)[ Professor McGonagall went straight to Harry.
“Come along, Potter,” she whispered. The thin line of her mouth was twitching as though she was about to cry. “Come along... hospital wing...”
To see McGonagall show so much emotion about broke me. This woman is always so composed and knows exactly what she’s doing but for the first time ever she can’t seem to be able to ignore her own feelings. She cares about Harry deeply and it never showed as much as after Cedric’s death. Such a great and beautiful scene! (hide spoiler)]
17.) (view spoiler)[ ”Fail to act – and history will remember you as the man who stepped aside, and allowed Voldemort a second chance to destroy the world we have tried to rebuild!”
Well, and that’s about exactly what happens. Fudge didn’t take Harry’s story seriously and the wizarding world had to pay the price for his ignorance. It’s kind of eerie how Rowling captured politics and how the fact that they work so slowly is standing in their own way. At first Fudge didn’t react and once he did, it was too slow to make a difference. He kind of dug his own grave with his actions at the end of GoF and history will indeed remember him as the man who stepped aside and allowed Voldemort to take a second shot at power. (hide spoiler)]
“The Order of the Phoenix” is up next and it’s the last book I have to borrow from the library because I actually have book 6 and 7 in English at home. =) So let’s hope I’ll be able to borrow book 5 soon.
I always forget how serious those books become.
“The Prisoner of Azkaban” was already very dark but I think “The Goblet of Fire” stepped it up a notch. The ending will always get me, no matter how old I am. >_<
Full RTC soon! Stay tuned!
P.S: I borrowed this twice from my library. *lol* That’s how I was able to continue. Thankfully they have a lot of copies of HP! XD
I just borrowed this from my library but of course someone else already preordered it again. >_<
So I guess that means I’ll have to be fast and start now!
617 pages with a super tiny font.
I CAN DO THIS!!!
Or well, at least I hope I can. *lol*
Regardless of everything I just said “The Goblet of Fire” has always been one of my favourite HP books. I’m curious if I’ll feel the same way after rereading it now.
Which HP book is your favourite and why? =) ...more
Notes are private!
Jul 20, 2020
Oct 02, 2020
Jul 04, 2017
Jul 21, 2007
Jul 21, 2007
it was amazing
Notes are private!
Jul 04, 2017