**spoiler alert** My first reaction was: SHE DIDN'T GIVE US THE WEDDING. Which was remedied. Next thought: is this the same series? It's so fucking ta**spoiler alert** My first reaction was: SHE DIDN'T GIVE US THE WEDDING. Which was remedied. Next thought: is this the same series? It's so fucking tame. And then it happened. The disinterest. The sex scenes dragged on...and on...and on...and kept happening. Like every five pages. And I was bored. Bored as hell. I wanted to seriously skip the sex scenes.
Then suddenly: PLOT. Like yeesh she like slapped us with plot. I was moderately intrigued but overall just wishing it was over. It took me like four days to read this book. And that's a lot for me. My friend accused me of quitting but I just wasn't really feeling it. I read a lot today (like half the book) because it had picked up enough. But...idk it just wasn't that good.
I think my biggest complaint about plot was: why did it all have to be connected? Why did everything need to be placed in this weird plot web? I would have been satisfied with: THIS GUY BAD BUT IT'S OK NOW BUT THIS BAD THING HAPPEN BUT IT'S OK NOW. Not: this guy is bad and does a bunch of bad things that aren't connected to the first book really but are super connected the plot of the third book. And we solved it but is it over? Who duuuuuuniiiiit? Oh wait it was obvious? Well that's ok I'm going to foreshadow that there is some kind of twist the whole book. *throws in random plots to make tension and terror worse* Quick make her pregnant to create even more tension. Ok so that bad guy got out. And more bad stuff happened. Oh and he's connected to all sorts of random things that seem pretty random. Oh it's ok now? And then everyone was happy. It just felt...cheap? I know it's supposed to be. I know I know. I'm chanting that like a mantra right now. But why is this the series that hit? Jesus.
And then I hit the end and was like oh, it's over. Turned over and said, hey husband, I just finished it. Flipped to the next page. Oh an epilogue. Oh wait, not really an epilogue as much as just a smattering of short random stories throughout the series. He looks over at me and says, "so oneshots?" I. Fucking. Lost. My. Shit. It was. They were fucking oneshots. She wrote this fanfiction and turned it into some over hyped huge selling story and then had the GALL to include her oneshots?!?! OH MY FUCKING GOD. Yes, CLEARLY this wasn't fanfiction. CLEARLY. Christ! Anyone who reads or writes fanfiction would see this as OBVIOUS. And once I knew, I couldn't let it go. I was like oh, this oneshot has the kinky sex scene people would as for. Oh this one is through his perspective. Oh this oneshot jumps in time. Hmmm. Must be a new chapter. I know most people don't know this but it just made me shutter.
Overall: cringe. I think that is the word I would use to define this experience. I could overlook some things while others just bugged the shit out of me. I had no idea how much horrific abuse happened within the series. I honestly don't even want to rate the books or my experience because it happened and I'm ready to move on. Would I read it again? Probably not. I'll hang onto the books just in case (because they were a bitch to track down) and I can see myself forgetting the story and getting the bug to read it again in a few years. For now, I'm done. I'm glad the books are done and I do not foresee myself reading more works from E L James....more
**spoiler alert** I'm trying to remember but all I can remember is they make "progress" and her shitty boss gets fired. Oh and they get engaged. Hones**spoiler alert** I'm trying to remember but all I can remember is they make "progress" and her shitty boss gets fired. Oh and they get engaged. Honestly, I'm looking at the book, willing it to remind me of what happened and I'm drawing a blank.
This book just had too much sex. Don't get me wrong, I love a good lemon fest. I love sex scenes that are over 20k words and longer than some novellas that exist. Well written smut is amazing. But this? I'm mad at you. Bangs it out. I'm mad at you and sad at you. Let's bang it out twice. I'm seething and can never forgive you. Let's have lots and lots of unrealistic sex. Like stick that man meat in me so my blossoming flower can quiver instantly because that's how sex works. And yeah, your man meat is the best it can get up like 20 times a day and produce a salty surprise every time. And oh my god your touch is such a turn on I get the dark heat coiling in my belly.
She didn't actually use that kind of language but she might as well have. Sex doesn't work that way. Christ. And wow we fight all the time but let's get married. How is that in any way HEALTHY?...more
I gave it a better try. I didn't find it too utterly repulsive however there were parts that probably weren't supposed to be funny that I laughed my aI gave it a better try. I didn't find it too utterly repulsive however there were parts that probably weren't supposed to be funny that I laughed my ass off at. But I've committed myself to the plot (ughhh) so now I have to read the second one....more
Hmm. It was a good ending. I mean it was almost cookie cutter cliche everyone was happy kind of ending. The whole series in general felt rushed as helHmm. It was a good ending. I mean it was almost cookie cutter cliche everyone was happy kind of ending. The whole series in general felt rushed as hell and it became even more apparent here when I didn't feel as connected to the characters as the rest of the characters. I liked the whole who-dun-it type thing, but I feel that there was some substance lacking. Honestly I just felt there could be more. More plot and more development between the characters. I really wanted to like Noah, but I feel like I only barely knew him. If there had been more of everything I would have loved it. And honestly, even though it's a YA novel, there was some darker stuff. You kind of can't avoid it when you're dealing with immortality. But the fear was so empty simply because the threats didn't feel powerful enough. I didn't feel worried or scared about how dark it was. If someone is going around killing people, it should be darker. More terrifying. In the moment, I couldn't put the book down and I loved it. But more depth and I feel like it would have been a star....more