Morganville Vampires Quotes
Quotes tagged as "morganville-vampires"
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“Scoot over, man. I don't like you that much."
"Dick. That's not what you said last night."
"Bite me.”
― Glass Houses
"Dick. That's not what you said last night."
"Bite me.”
― Glass Houses

“Claire stretched out against the wall and kissed it. "Glad to see you, too," she whispered, and pressed her cheek against the smooth surface. It almost felt like it hugged her back.
"Dude, it's a house," Shane said from behind her. "Hug somebody who cares.”
― Lord of Misrule
"Dude, it's a house," Shane said from behind her. "Hug somebody who cares.”
― Lord of Misrule

“But that quickly faded, and he frowned. "You're bleeding," he said. "What happened?"
Claire sighed and held up her wrist to show him the bandage. "Man, you would be so embarrassed if I said it was something else." Michael looked blank. "I'm a girl, Michael, it could have been all natural, you know. Tampons?”
― Midnight Alley
Claire sighed and held up her wrist to show him the bandage. "Man, you would be so embarrassed if I said it was something else." Michael looked blank. "I'm a girl, Michael, it could have been all natural, you know. Tampons?”
― Midnight Alley

“Goodness,' Myrnin said quietly. 'I don't think I should be watching this. I don't think I'm old enough.”
― Fade Out
― Fade Out

“Better be," Eve said. She mock-bit at his finger. "I could totally date somebody else, you know."
"And I could rent out your room."
"And I could put your game console on eBay."
"Hey," Shane protested. "Now you're just being mean.”
― Lord of Misrule
"And I could rent out your room."
"And I could put your game console on eBay."
"Hey," Shane protested. "Now you're just being mean.”
― Lord of Misrule

“Eve: She told me last!
Shane: Boyfriend!
Michael: Landlord!
Eve: Crap. Right. Next time you sell your soul to the devil, I get first contact!”
― Midnight Alley
Shane: Boyfriend!
Michael: Landlord!
Eve: Crap. Right. Next time you sell your soul to the devil, I get first contact!”
― Midnight Alley

“Hell,' Shane spit in disgust. 'I can't hit a girl. Here, Claire. You hit her.' He tossed her the bat.”
― Glass Houses
― Glass Houses

“No, not you two. Stay here.'
'Does he just not get how unfair and sexist that is?' Eve asked. 'Men.'
'You really want to go first?'
'Of course no. But I'd like the chance to refuse to go first.”
― Lord of Misrule
'Does he just not get how unfair and sexist that is?' Eve asked. 'Men.'
'You really want to go first?'
'Of course no. But I'd like the chance to refuse to go first.”
― Lord of Misrule

“If you ask me if I'm okay again, I'm going to smack myself in the face just to punish you.”
― Midnight Alley
― Midnight Alley

“I don’t see a way in,” Eve whispered.
Why are you whispering?” Myrnin whispered back. “Vampires can hear us, anyway.”
― Fade Out
Why are you whispering?” Myrnin whispered back. “Vampires can hear us, anyway.”
― Fade Out

“Oliver: You turned me down. So why, I wonder, did you decide Amelie would be a better choice?
Claire: She smells better. And she made me cookies.”
― Midnight Alley
Claire: She smells better. And she made me cookies.”
― Midnight Alley

“You're kidding. I thought all geniuses read Latin. Isn't that the international language for smart people?"-Shane (Glass Houses)”
― Glass Houses
― Glass Houses

“What about Myrnin?'
Eve swallowed, almost choked, and Michael patted her kindly on the back. She beamed at him. 'Myrnin? Oh yeah. He did a Batman and took off into the night. What is with that guy, Claire? If he was a superhero, he'd be Bipolar Man.”
― Lord of Misrule
Eve swallowed, almost choked, and Michael patted her kindly on the back. She beamed at him. 'Myrnin? Oh yeah. He did a Batman and took off into the night. What is with that guy, Claire? If he was a superhero, he'd be Bipolar Man.”
― Lord of Misrule

“Okay, this was kissing. Serious kissing. Not just a kiss before moving out, not a good-bye, this was Hello, sexy, and wow, she’d never even suspected that it could feel this way.”
― Glass Houses
― Glass Houses

“Hannah leaned against the wall. 'Mind if I call shotgun?'
'Since you're carrying one? Feel free.”
― Lord of Misrule
'Since you're carrying one? Feel free.”
― Lord of Misrule

“Claire. Wake up.” She blinked and realized that her head was on Shane’s shoulder, and Michael was nowhere to be seen. Her first thought was, Oh my God, am I drooling? Her second was that she hadn’t realized she was so close to him, snuggled in. Her third was that although Michael’s part of the couch was empty, Shane hadn’t moved away. And he was watching her with warm, friendly eyes. Oh. Oh, wow, that was nice.”
― Glass Houses
― Glass Houses

“That's it? That's your big goodbye?" Eve asked.
Claire looked at Eve mystified. "I think I need guy CliffNotes."
"Guys aren't deep enough to need CliffNotes."
"What were you waiting for, flowery poetry?" Shane snorted. "I hugged. I'm done.”
― Lord of Misrule
Claire looked at Eve mystified. "I think I need guy CliffNotes."
"Guys aren't deep enough to need CliffNotes."
"What were you waiting for, flowery poetry?" Shane snorted. "I hugged. I'm done.”
― Lord of Misrule

“Not nearly enough. Not recently, anyway.” And she was sad about that.
“I know,” he said, and kissed the back of her hand. “We’ll fix it. Get some sleep.”
“Night,” she said, and watched him walk toward the door. “Hey. How’d you get in?”
He wiggled his fingers at her in a spooky oogie-boogie pantomime. “I’m a vampire. I have secret powers ,” he said with a full-on fake Transylvanian accent, which he dropped to say, “Actually, your mom let me in.”
“Seriously? My mom? Let you in my room? In the middle of the night?”
He shrugged. “Moms like me.”
He gave her a full-on Hollywood grin, and slipped out the door.”
― Carpe Corpus
“I know,” he said, and kissed the back of her hand. “We’ll fix it. Get some sleep.”
“Night,” she said, and watched him walk toward the door. “Hey. How’d you get in?”
He wiggled his fingers at her in a spooky oogie-boogie pantomime. “I’m a vampire. I have secret powers ,” he said with a full-on fake Transylvanian accent, which he dropped to say, “Actually, your mom let me in.”
“Seriously? My mom? Let you in my room? In the middle of the night?”
He shrugged. “Moms like me.”
He gave her a full-on Hollywood grin, and slipped out the door.”
― Carpe Corpus

“Silver nitrate and water in a super soaker," he told her. "My own invention. Ought to be good at twenty feet, kind of like wasp spray."
Oh. "You get me the nicest things."
"Anybody can get jewelry. Posers”
― Fade Out
Oh. "You get me the nicest things."
"Anybody can get jewelry. Posers”
― Fade Out

“As she turned to concentrate on the portal, Eve tugged on Claire's shirt. "What?"
"Ask him where he got the boots."
"You ask." Personally, Claire wanted the vampire bunny slippers.”
― Fade Out
"Ask him where he got the boots."
"You ask." Personally, Claire wanted the vampire bunny slippers.”
― Fade Out

“Don't diss me, Danvers. I'm warning you.'
'I'm not dissing you,' Claire sighed. 'I'm ignoring you. There's a difference. Dissing you implies I think you're actually important.”
― Ghost Town
'I'm not dissing you,' Claire sighed. 'I'm ignoring you. There's a difference. Dissing you implies I think you're actually important.”
― Ghost Town

“Michael rose to his feet and padded down the last few steps silently, came up behind Kim, and leaned over her to say, “I vant to drink your blood” in a heavy, fake-Dracula accent. She shrieked, flailed, and a zombie ate her brains on-screen.
You sabotaged me!” Kim yelled, dropped the controller, and smacked him hard on the chest. “I can’t believe you just totally sabotaged me!”
Can’t let him lose,” Michael said, as Shane hit the high score and the victory music sounded. “Gotta live with the dude.”
They high-fived.
You’re seriously going to take that as a win,” Kim said. “When he totally cheated for you.”
Yes,” Shane said. “I seriously am.”
― Fade Out
You sabotaged me!” Kim yelled, dropped the controller, and smacked him hard on the chest. “I can’t believe you just totally sabotaged me!”
Can’t let him lose,” Michael said, as Shane hit the high score and the victory music sounded. “Gotta live with the dude.”
They high-fived.
You’re seriously going to take that as a win,” Kim said. “When he totally cheated for you.”
Yes,” Shane said. “I seriously am.”
― Fade Out

“I love arguing with you, Claire. You always surprise me. And occasionally, you even make sense.”
― Ghost Town
― Ghost Town

“What’s your name?' she asked, and surprised herself. But for some reason, she wanted to know.
Dean’s brother—he hadn’t been just some nameless Bad Guy Number Four. This vampire wasn’t, either. He had a name, a history, maybe even people who cared what happened to him.
'My name is none of your business,' he said, and continued to stare out the window, even though there was nothing but blurry brick out there.
'Can I call you None for short?”
― Carpe Corpus
Dean’s brother—he hadn’t been just some nameless Bad Guy Number Four. This vampire wasn’t, either. He had a name, a history, maybe even people who cared what happened to him.
'My name is none of your business,' he said, and continued to stare out the window, even though there was nothing but blurry brick out there.
'Can I call you None for short?”
― Carpe Corpus

“When I want to be lectured on strategy, I'll consult someone who's actually won battles,' Amelie said. 'Not one who ran away from them.'
'Snap,' Eve said.
'You know what they're talking about?' Shane asked.
'Don't need to know to get that one. She smacked him so hard his momma felt it.”
― Fade Out
'Snap,' Eve said.
'You know what they're talking about?' Shane asked.
'Don't need to know to get that one. She smacked him so hard his momma felt it.”
― Fade Out

“Anybody else think that was weird?' Shane asked as they got into the car. Eve sent him an exasperated glance; the three of them were, of course, in the backseat. Amelie had the front, with Michael.
'Ya think? In general, or in particular?'
'Weird that we got through the entire thing, and I didn’t have to hit anybody.'
There was a moment of silence. Michael said, as he started the car, 'You’re right, Shane. That is strange.”
― Fade Out
'Ya think? In general, or in particular?'
'Weird that we got through the entire thing, and I didn’t have to hit anybody.'
There was a moment of silence. Michael said, as he started the car, 'You’re right, Shane. That is strange.”
― Fade Out

“I'll do it!"
"No, you won't," Shane and Michael said, at virtually the same time. Shane continued. "You're barely on your feet, Claire. You don't go anywhere, not without me."
"And me," Michael said.
"Hell," Eve sighed. "I guess that means I have to go, too. Which I may not ever forgive you for, even if I don't die horribly.”
― Lord of Misrule
"No, you won't," Shane and Michael said, at virtually the same time. Shane continued. "You're barely on your feet, Claire. You don't go anywhere, not without me."
"And me," Michael said.
"Hell," Eve sighed. "I guess that means I have to go, too. Which I may not ever forgive you for, even if I don't die horribly.”
― Lord of Misrule
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