Counselling Quotes

Quotes tagged as "counselling" (showing 1-30 of 40)
Carl R. Rogers
“The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.”
Carl R. Rogers, On Becoming a Person: A Therapist's View of Psychotherapy

Ravi Zacharias
“Marriage brings together not just a man and his wife but their children and their struggles. To suddenly drop the partner who has carried that load with you along life's journey for all these years for someone with no strings or worries attached is cruel. Marriage is not a commercial enterprise in which you replace a car you have tired of with another one.”
Ravi Zacharias, I, Isaac, Take Thee, Rebekah: Moving from Romance to Lasting Love

“For example, in order to identify these schemas or clarify faulty relational expectations, therapists working from an object relations, attachment, or cognitive behavioral framework often ask themselves (and their clients) questions like these: 1. What does the client tend to want from me or others? (For example, clients who repeatedly were ignored, dismissed, or even rejected might wish to be responded to emotionally, reached out to when they have a problem, or to be taken seriously when they express a concern.) 2. What does the client usually expect from others? (Different clients might expect others to diminish or compete with them, to take advantage and try to exploit them, or to admire and idealize them as special.) 3. What is the client’s experience of self in relationship to others? (For example, they might think of themselves as being unimportant or unwanted, burdensome to others, or responsible for handling everything.) 4. What are the emotional reactions that keep recurring? (In relationships, the client may repeatedly find himself feeling insecure or worried, self-conscious or ashamed, or—for those who have enjoyed better developmental experiences—perhaps confident and appreciated.) 5. As a result of these core beliefs, what are the client’s interpersonal strategies for coping with his relational problems? (Common strategies include seeking approval or trying to please others, complying and going along with what others want them to do, emotionally disengaging or physically withdrawing from others, or trying to dominate others through intimidation or control others via criticism and disapproval.) 6. Finally, what kind of reactions do these interpersonal styles tend to elicit from the therapist and others? (For example, when interacting together, others often may feel boredom, disinterest, or irritation; a press to rescue or take care of them in some way; or a helpless feeling that no matter how hard we try, whatever we do to help disappoints them and fails to meet their need.)”
Edward Teyber, Interpersonal Process in Therapy: An Integrative Model

“Too often the survivor is seen by [himself or] herself and others as "nuts," "crazy," or "weird." Unless her responses are understood within the context of trauma. A traumatic stress reaction consists of *natural* emotions and behaviors in response to a catastrophe, its immediate aftermath, or memories of it. These reactions can occur anytime after the trauma, even decades later. The coping strategies that victims use can be understood only within the context of the abuse of a child. The importance of context was made very clear many years ago when I was visiting the home of a Holocaust survivor. The woman's home was within the city limits of a large metropolitan area. Every time a police or ambulance siren sounded, she became terrified and ran and hid in a closet or under the bed. To put yourself in a closet at the sound of a far-off siren is strange behavior indeed—outside of the context of possibly being sent to a death camp. Within that context, it makes perfect sense. Unless we as therapists have a good grasp of the context of trauma, we run the risk of misunderstanding the symptoms our clients present and, hence, responding inappropriately or in damaging ways.”
Diane Mandt Langberg, Counseling Survivors of Sexual Abuse

“Maturity means being able to tolerate, on all sorts of planes, uncertainty and not knowing.”
Hazel Johns, The Needs of Counsellors and Psychotherapists: Emotional, Social, Physical, Professional

Dave Mearns
“Development is not about learning how to counsel but about becoming the kind of person who can counsel.”
Dave Mearns, Person-Centred Counselling in Action

Dave Mearns
“Part of the discipline of the person-centred approach is not to make assumptions about the client's appropriate process, but to follow the process laid out by the client.”
Dave Mearns, Person-Centred Therapy Today: New Frontiers in Theory and Practice

Israelmore Ayivor
“Accept corrections and you’ll improve and increase.”
Israelmore Ayivor, Become a Better You

David Smail
“Suffering is a form of knowledge. It tells us what is wrong with our world.”
David Smail, Implausible Professions: Arguments for Pluralism and Autonomy in Psychotherapy and Counselling

Judith Lewis Herman
“Learning how to do psychotherapy is a complex process, much of which is transacted in the relationship between the beginning therapists and experienced supervisors. When the beginning therapists encounter problems that are beyond their range of experience, the supervisors usually assist in several ways. First, the supervisors offer an intellectual
framework in which to understand the problem. References to the professional literature are often suggested. Second, the supervisors offer practical, problem-solving help with the strategies of therapy. Third and most important, the supervisors help the less experienced therapists to deal with feelings of their own that have been evoked by the patients. With the support of competent supervisors, the therapists are usually able to master their own troubled feelings and put them in perspective.
This done, the therapists are better able to attend to patients with empathy, and with a confidence in their ability to offer help.”
Judith Lewis Herman, Father-Daughter Incest: With a New Afterword

“I wish I had a magic wand to make things better, but therapy doesn't work that way.”
Lynn I. Wilson, The Flock: The Autobiography of a Multiple Personality

Lailah Gifty Akita
“You must not give up in the middle of the journey. May you have grace to travel onward.”
Lailah Gifty Akita, Think Great: Be Great!

Lailah Gifty Akita
“Marriages can endure any difficulty with unfailing love and dedication.”
Lailah Gifty Akita, Think Great: Be Great!

Lailah Gifty Akita
“Every sacred marriage will survive all times with great love and patient commitment.”
Lailah Gifty Akita, Think Great: Be Great!

“Being an effective person-centred counsellor is not so much a matter of possessing skills and knowledge, but of having a particular set of deeply-held values and beliefs and then being able to express these qualities in interactions with other people.”
John McLeod, Person-Centred Counselling in Action

Lailah Gifty Akita
“With perseverance and endurance you can survive any storm.”
Lailah Gifty Akita, Pearls of Wisdom: Great mind

“Psychotherapy is an art enlightened by wisdom, theory and research.”
Barbara Temaner Brodley, Person-Centred Practice: The BAPCA Reader

“Growth is a slow process and so is change in behaviour. The therapist must be patient with the process.”
Garry L. Landreth, Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship

“Psychotherapy and counselling should make people aware of themselves and of the difficulties which they face. This then gives them the freedom to choose for themselves. In this sense, unlike behaviour therapy, psychotherapy is value-free: no advice, suggestions or recriminations are given. Indeed the only value of psychotherapy is respect for the individual. Such respect, however, in a mechanistic and objectifying society ... becomes a political act.”
Paul Kline, Psychology Exposed, Or, the Emperor's New Clothes

Ljupka Cvetanova
“There is a perfect marriage. Any marriage counselor can tell you that.”
Ljupka Cvetanova, The New Land

Dave Mearns
“The counsellor who never reads a novel or never opens a book of poetry is neglecting an important resource for empathic development.”
Dave Mearns, Person-Centred Counselling in Action

Carl R. Rogers
“I believe that even our most abstract and philosophical views spring from an intensely personal base.”
Carl R. Rogers, Man and the Science of Man

“In a world where we seem to be beset by a trend towards 'manualising treatment modalities' the person-centred approach stands and says NO, that is not the way forward.”
Richard Bryant-Jefferies, Counselling a Survivor of Child Sexual Abuse: A Person-Centred Dialogue

J.M. Coetzee
“No, I have not sought counselling nor do I intend to seek it. I am a grown man. I am not receptive to being counselled. I am beyond the reach of counselling.”
J.M. Coetzee, Disgrace

“My father told me, ‘my son, don’t ever undermine the power of patience; it brings a lot of hidden things to realities and it enhances understanding; it can uplift you and it can also break you down! After certain steps in life, you shall know patience well! Handle patience well with patience; it is such an awesome weapon in the battle of life! When you have to move with patience, get the heart of patience to do that or else you shall understand patience well because of impatience! When you have to go with impatience, be swift, but remember patience in the action! In the end, one thing that will give you a very good picture of the journey of your life is the mirror of patience’. After he had spoken, I sat quietly and pondered over patience!”
Ernest Agyemang Yeboah

Lailah Gifty Akita
“In all spheres of life, we find the grace of patient endurance.”
Lailah Gifty Akita, Think Great: Be Great!

Monica Starkman
“Can a therapist make me not want to get pregnant? Can a therapist undo the trouble with my eggs, my hormones, and whatever else isn't working? I can't help it, but it feels like an insult for the doctor to send me there. Like telling people with cancer they can think themselves healthy if they try hard enough to visualize their immune cells as little sharks gobbling up the tumor. It's just blaming the victim.”
Monica Starkman, The End of Miracles

Bessel A. van der Kolk
“If you criticize others, they don't dare to hurt you. If you are perfect, nobody can criticize you.”
Bessel A. van der Kolk, The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma

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