David Sedaris

“June 3, 1987 Chicago This afternoon I found a $50 bill in the foyer of the building near the mailboxes. It was folded thin and full of cocaine. Some of it spilled when I opened it up, but there’s still plenty left. So that’s $50 in cash and around $80 worth of cocaine—$130! If I find $50 every day, I won’t need to get a job.”

David Sedaris, Theft by Finding: Diaries
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Theft by Finding: Diaries (1977-2002) Theft by Finding: Diaries by David Sedaris
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