“Criticism is often unwelcome for various reasons, but if we immediately go on the defensive, we can’t distinguish between valid, helpful criticism and unfair criticism. If you have an insecurity button that gets pushed when you are criticized, try to quell the automatic internal storm that erupts: “Who is she to criticize me?” “He thinks he knows better than I do.” “If I don’t respond strongly, she’ll think I’m admitting fault.” This reaction short-circuits the process of seeing whether the criticism has value and correcting the underlying problem.”