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Vesela.K asked this question about Not Without My Daughter:
Why do all of you say such negative thing about the book and things like "It's written this way to make readers sympathize Betty"? Why is it so ubelievable for you that it really is a real story. Everybody knows that women in Islamic world is treated way differently than other religions.
Celina Knippling My issue is that she is very derogatory when describing her in-laws and other Persians. I get that she had the in-laws from hell, but her book goes ou…moreMy issue is that she is very derogatory when describing her in-laws and other Persians. I get that she had the in-laws from hell, but her book goes out of its way not only to slam them for every little fault (like spilling sugar when getting some in their tea), but also describes them in pretty derogatory terms, saying they were dirty, that they left unhygenic messes all over the place, etc. If this is how they really are, maybe they have different standards in their family than she did. She sounded a bit anal-retentive in describing her efforts to maintain immaculate homes in the US at all times.

The biggest thing for me though is that she takes her in-laws foibles and applies them wholesale to EVERYONE in Iran. She writes off teachers as brainwashed drones. They probably saw a mom who was fighting to keep her kid uneducated and tied to another country's culture to her detriment. Think about it like this: if your friend was married to a woman from Iran who refused to send her child to elementary school and fought letting her child learn English or start to integrate into the US, you would probably think that woman had a screw loose or two. Also, when she extrapolates her in-laws behavior to everyone in the country, she treats people who helped her as simpletons and exceptions to the rule. Try reading other books written by people who don't have her biased/racist views, (Lipstick Jihad, Reading Lolita in Tehran), and it may open your eyes that most of the people in Iran are pretty decent folk who just have different political or religious views. Are there limitations there for women that restrict freedoms I and other women enjoy? Yes, but America also restricts behaviors or freedoms they would find just as barbaric.

Her husband was an abusive jerk, but so are a lot of white American husbands, unfortunately. The focus of the book should have been on "I married an abusive man whose family supported his behavior, but thankfully escaped to make a better life for myself and my daughter." The shame is that what her book REALLY says (intentionally or not) is "I married a man who belongs to a nation of abusers and kidnappers with disgusting unhygenic habits who hate freedom for women but I got out and am letting you all know about this evil country."

That's why people (like me) call it a racist book.(less)
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Not Without My Daughter
by Betty Mahmoody
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