Marcia asked:

I am on page 270...there are 648 pages.........I'm stuck.. I'm not liking it.. its boring ......and too wordy......should I stick with it.......? the first 100 pages I was hooked but now I'm struggling.

To answer questions about We Are Not Ourselves, please sign up.
Laura Abby Stick with it! The pace is one of the qualities of this book that will move you in the end - you are tricked into living this family's life in the slow yet rapid way that we all live our lives.
PacaLipstick Gramma Dump it. So not worth the hype. Repetitive, boring, long-suffering, and the main character is the epitome of martyrdom.
Brookemower i stuck it out but it never got better. it just goes on and on and on…zzzzzz
Lindsay Yes, definitely keep going. I found the first half a bit slowly but beautiful written, and the second half of the book is incredible. Seriously, keep reading.
Pgricchi It is hard to say, I don't know your age status, or perspective. Are you partnered? do you have a child?

It IS a long read, and not immediately gratifying. The book will be most resonant for those who it will help to understand their parents, and for those who recognize what they experienced or avoided. It can also be preparation for the rest of life. It was for me on the first two accounts, but I am roughly the same age as the main characters.

There is a growing sense of foreboding and it evolves into things that will create discomfort...he does not flinch, he does not look away. But the end is uplifting.

Trust me, read it to the end. I explain in my review, but its so brilliant, and there's a scene towards the end that makes it what it is.
Ditch I have only made it to 140 pp and I'm struggling. It is boring, very. It reads like a descriptive summary of everyday events of a bland family. I'll stick with it for a while and if my level of interest changes I will make sure I comment further.
CMGH I am 1/3 of the way through the book. At this point, I would be willing to read someone's summary of the remaining chapters. I like the characters well enough but I am not getting anything out of the time I am investing in reading this story. Yes, I feel for them. Yes, they have some aspirations and disappointments. Sadly, a member of the family is afflicted with a traumatic illness. It's interesting to see how the member copes and how the family slowly discovers the illness. However, life is just too short to spend so much time on this book unless you have nothing to do but read. If the ending is as riveting as others say then the first third of the book is dis-service to the overall story. There is virtually no tension accomplished in this story despite the significant issues referenced: American dream/disappointment, bullying, catastrophic illness. We understand the characters but they are not developed to the point that we feel what they feel at a gut level. Despite the excruciating length of this book, at one-third in we still remain a million miles away from characters that are no more interesting or challenged than the individuals in many families we know (maybe even our own).
Moon Shine Art Spot ~ Lisa Ok. Those of you who said stick with it were right. The characters were not perfect, but who is. The story made me happy, sad, mad, it was way too long, like life often is in bad times. I am GLAD I stuck with it... Valuable lessons & just full of ALOT of real life.
Rachel I'm with you. I'm on page 177 and wondering if these people are ever going to do anything interesting. We've seen Eileen from age 10 to 50'ish and I just don't know how the rest of life is going to cover another 400 pages.
Connie Gunderson I finished it and I agree with "dump it, not worth the hype." It just gets darker and even wordier.
Will This book is a lovely and loving depiction of a woman who from an early age works hard to keep her family together. Wonderfully detailed and insightful. Hard to believe it's a first novel. Thomas really has a wonderful sensitivity to the complex emotions that run through families. I write as someone who usually doesn't like books like this. I'm so glad I found it! I feel sorry for those who can't get through it.
Kathleen I felt the same way when I read this book; however, I just finished it and I am so pleased I did. This book is like a life - there are good and satisfying parts to it as well as tedious, what am I doing here moments. But, in the end, it is the totality of the life that matters, as it is with this book. The totality of it is just riveting. It is very, very good and I hope you will reconsider if you are thinking of putting it down.
Joyce Schiff Very poignant topic............ would have been excellent if it was 200 pages shorter......... Way too much not necessary detail in the book.
Ann Half way through is when the story really takes off. I considered giving up, but am so glad I didn't.
Natalie Long and boring. As another review said, only if you are interested in a family's difficult struggle with Alzheimer's. Not worth it.
Kate NOT worth it! I bailed out half way through. (See my review.) Can't imagine what editor or publisher let this get through the filter.
Wendy Cosin I was bored for the first 100 pages, then got interested, and then was bored off and on for the rest of the book. If you have time to read 600 pages while accepting that it has gems mixed in with the less interesting stuff, I'd keep going. Also, if you are interested in the topic of a family dealing with this particular illness, it is worth keeping going.
Curtis give in to temptation and drop it in the garbage disposal. written in the style of a creative writing graduate, long-winded, tedious and without any ultimate purpose. foolishly took it on a flight and was relieved when violent air turbulence improved my travelling experience....
Connie Bell i am halfway though the book and bored out of my mind. he is skipping through parts of their life and seems like he is reading someone's diary. fact to fact. this happened then they made love. then that happened, ugh!
seems like he was taking the woman as his speaker but doesn't know how a woman's mind works emotionally. maybe he should speak from a mans point of view.
Andi I was just about to ask the same question. I'm probably about 50% of the way through. I'm going through my own mid-life crisis and I have anxiety and worry about my health, and this book just seems to amplify everything I am anxious about. And I don't like the characters. I think I will stick with it as I am hoping the ending will make me feel a bit better and because if I quit, I may just keep this awful feeling I have now for a while instead. If I had known about the main health issue in this book, I would have never started it. This had better be worth it. I'm definitely going to choose a very different book to read next, like Amy Poehler's memoir.

Edit: just finished the book. I'm sort of glad I did so I didn't leave at a darker spot which would have put in me in a worse mood for a while. So I finished and it was a bit better so my mood is better, but I wish I never read the book in the first place.
Troycarlson Maybe turn the Tv back on
Susan yes, a beautiful moving novel.
Kate Hang in there! You go through periods like that in this book. It is worth it.
Irene Kovacs No. Give a book 25 pages or at most 50.
Della Scott I'm about halfway through the audiobook, and say stick with it. This seems to be the kind of novel that builds very slowly but definitely pays off. I actually teared up at one dinner party scene, but won't say more at the risk of spoilers.
How one reacts to this novel may very well have to do with one's stage of life.
Kendra Shimmin I'm half way through it, and it's been a struggle. I think I'll give up on it.
Val No! I did because of some other of the more depressing books I have ever read...stop while you still have hope!!!
Sean E.D. Kerr This is an amazing book. I, too, slowed down at some parts, but fell in love. I read it at the end of 2015, and it has landed pretty close to the number one spot of my favourite books of all time. Keep reading! As it comes to a close, it feels so complete. What a great emotional journey.
Susan Haines Echoed my sentiments exactly. Was not worth the next 500 pages.
Andrea Houseman West No, this was the same thing I felt... It doesn't get better.
Karen Stay with it. I read on my iPad and didn't notice until I was well past page 300 that this book is LONG!!! Kind of makes you miss seeing the actual hardback version. You want these people to DO something interesting? They will and the progress from year to year through the 50's, 60's and 70's is interesting of itself.
Colette No - waste of effort. No insight, no poetry and no depth.
Cyndy I too am plodding through this book. I decided to stick with it but am not sure it is worth it. Waaay too much detail and unnecessary plot points.
Image for We Are Not Ourselves
by Matthew Thomas (Goodreads Author)
Rate this book
Clear rating

About Goodreads Q&A

Ask and answer questions about books!

You can pose questions to the Goodreads community with Reader Q&A, or ask your favorite author a question with Ask the Author.

See Featured Authors Answering Questions

Learn more