How Not to Write a Novel: 200 Classic Mistakes and How to Avoid Them—A Misstep-by-Misstep Guide

by Howard Mittelmark

Don’t panic, Jack told himself. All you need to do is get in a blow to his wrist. That will make him drop the gun, and you can duck, slipping Synthya to the ground unharmed, and knock him out with the butt. “Going somewhere?” sneered Nefaro. He leered at Synthya, lecherously and salaciously. “Yeah, we’re going home, and then we’re going to get married,” said Jack breezily. “I don’t know how you’re going to do that—when you’re dead!” Jack sprang into action. Dealing Doctor Nefaro a blow on the wrist, he made him drop the gun. Jack then ducked, slipping Synthya to the ground unharmed, grabbed the gun, and clubbed Nefaro on the head, dropping him to his knees. Soon Nefaro was stretched out unconscious on the ground. “That will teach you to design chairs that place undue pressure on the lower lumbar structure!” Jack cried in victory.

When there is a plan, things cannot go according to it. If they do, the plan becomes a spoiler, the action becomes dull and predictable, and the reader’s plan to finish your book is what gets derailed.