Maggie Moves On

by Lucy Score

“And then they died tragically of typhoid and lead-based paint?” he guessed.

“That looks like the four horses of the apocalypse guarding a communitywide West Nile virus infection waiting to happen,” he said, eyeing the foot of black, murky water and debris clogging the fountain’s pool.

Well, the cool-girl thing had been nice while it lasted. It was good to remember that deep down she was still the kind of gal who would choke on her own spit in public.

But if Kevin gets bored, he just decides to cut out the middleman and give himself the treats. Two weeks ago, I got a call from the ice cream place saying Kevin was waiting in line for his usual. Still don’t know how he got out of the house.”

Ugh. Mad Dog 20/20. Really she was doing them a favor. A plastic bottle of mango-flavored liquor was never a good idea.

Oh, and don’t bring any lollipops. The patient doesn’t deserve any.”

“It was delightful meeting you, Maggie,” he said, producing a lollipop from his backpack with a flourish. She couldn’t help but smile as she accepted the candy.

“You’re the one who asked him to take a picture of your feet and then confessed to stalking him on social media. I’m rescuing him before we end up in some creepy harassment lawsuit.”

Cody: Kevin, Dolly Parton, and Taco are asleep on Dean’s bed. Maggie: Weirdest sentences for $200, Alex.

Albert from Shitter’s Full Plumbing

creepy ceramic doll collections

“If you just put some kind of creepy antique BDSM collar on me, we are going to have words,”