When We Were

by Diana Elliot Graham

AB, This conversation is years too late, but I need to be clear. I did not end our relationship, you did. I am taking this trip down memory lane because I know you have no ulterior motive, and now I am interested to know how we ended up with different understandings of what happened. Dredging up old love can be a slippery slope, and in all the years since, we’ve preserved this friendship by staying away from that edge. You wanted my perspective. Here it is: My intention that night was not for closure. It was to get you to settle, to calm down, to focus on us, to just wait until morning. Until we had sobered from the alcohol and argument. I thought if I had gotten you to stop focusing on the noise created by those around us, we would have been fine. By the next morning, it was too late. I accepted what you were saying, and that we were done. You were so sure, kept repeating the need for closure, who was I to argue with you about your own mind. I don’t know what would have happened if we had taken a minute to understand each other that night. We were so young, and while I would say nothing lasts, our friendship certainly has. We have known each other a long time, and I have no regrets about where we ended up. Only now that you spent half your life thinking I dumped you. Your friend P.S. Thank you for the sufficient mind-fucking yesterday. You always would do anything in the name of literature. If any of what happened is referenced in your friend’s book, I expect to be includ...