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At least he’d killed Abby as mercilessly as anyone else, despite being a woman. A champion of equality right there.
In the end, we’re all monsters leaving mountains of corpses in our wake, so trying to judge who has the least bad corpse-mountain is just moronic in my opinion."
Jake had begun a new diet called SHIT, I GOTTA HURRY UP AND EAT THAT FUCKING BANANA BEFORE IT DISAPPEARS! DAMN YOU, TIME TREE THAT ISN’T ACTUALLY A TREE! It was a very healthy diet, naturally consisting of magical time bananas.
The troll defended a mushroom. Bad guy. The Deepdwellers practically worshipped mushrooms. Even badder guys. Jake hated mushrooms. Good guy. It was just math.
It was just a normal day in the village. The Deepdwellers spent it covering themselves in mushroom spores, praying to mushrooms, infusing energy into mushrooms, tending to mushrooms, talking about mushrooms, and thinking about mushrooms. Their evil acts had attracted a hero of justice. One who had come to put an end to their villainous ways. Justice would be swift and effective, but more importantly, highly explosive.
He couldn’t wait to be a few grades higher and be able to pop out limbs like green dudes from a planet once blown up by someone with a name related to the refrigeration industry.
