Eclipse (Twilight, #3)

by Stephenie Meyer

And I realized that I’d been wrong all along about the magnets. It had not been Edward and Jacob that I’d been trying to force together, it was the two parts of myself, Edward’s Bella and Jacob’s Bella. But they could not exist together, and I never should have tried.

Me when I cheat and manipulate and I try to gaslight myself into thinking it’s ok.