Blind Side (Red Zone Rivals, #2)

by Kandi Steiner

“You swallowed my cum,” I reminded her, nipping her bottom lip with my teeth as she let out a whimper of a moan. “And you want to know if I liked it as much as you did.”

“Let me show you,” I whispered into the shell of her ear. And then I kissed my way down, ready to feast.

“Fuck, Kitten,” he said next, his fingertips playing at the seam of my thong. “You fucking loved that, didn’t you? Being on your knees for me. You’re soaked.”

“Did you like how I tasted, how you gagged on my cock?” “Yes,” I breathed, rolling my lips together as I squirmed beneath his touch. “And I loved when you came because of me.” “All because of you,”

“I want to see you, Kitten,” he cooed. “I want to taste you.”

My hands shot out for his hair instinctively, but I tore them away, reaching for my sides, instead. “Do it,” he said, grabbing one hand and moving it back to his hair. “Show me where.”

He paused at my ankle, trailing up my knee-high stocking until he slipped a finger beneath the top of it. “These drive me insane, you know,” he husked, taking his time crawling his hands back up to where I really wanted them. “Every time you wear them, I think of how many ways I could peel them off you.”

I knew he was faking. I knew he was just giving me the dirty talk he could clearly see I reacted to. But still, I lit up under those words as if they were the purest truth, as if I really could be sexy enough to drive a man like Clay Johnson to insanity.

“Damn,” he breathed. “Such a pretty pussy.”

“Rub your tits for me, Kitten,” he breathed against my skin, the breath cool where I was wet and hot. “Stroke yourself with me. Come for me.”

“Lesson complete,” he whispered, kissing my hair. “You are so fucking good at that.” He barked out a laugh. “So are you.” “Really?” I peeled back to look at him. “Did I do okay?” His smile slipped, his eyes skating over my face before he spotted a rogue curl and tucked it behind my ear. “You were amazing.”

“Do I need to go deeper? Should I get some lessons on deep throating or something?” “Jesus, Kitten, are you trying to get me hard again?” I laughed. “I’m surprised I could even fit you in my mouth.” “Okay seriously, stop talking.”

“And for letting me escape in you.” I peered up at him. “I’m always here,” I promised.

“Let me walk you home.” “No,” I insisted, shaking my head. “I’m going to get food. Maybe stop by the coffee shop to see Shawn play.”

It was a lie, a bold-faced one I tried to seal with an excited smile as if that’s all I wanted in the world — to see Shawn Stetson. The truth was much darker, much more foreign, and much more terrifying.

I stayed away from Giana all week. It was like refusing myself the pleasure of jumping into a refreshing spring on a hot summer day, like restricting myself from drinking water as I heave from dehydration — but I had to do it. I was in too deep.

She knew, without me having to say a word, that I needed something. She knew what I needed. And she let me lose myself in her.

It was all under the guise of a lesson, but I knew if I was being honest with myself, that wasn’t what it was for me.

I wanted her. I wanted her so badly my chest had a gaping hole in it whenever I wasn’t with her.

I wasn’t even thinking about Maliyah anymore, and maybe I hadn’t been for a while now. I couldn’t put my finger on when it changed, when my focus shifted, but I knew the shift was fundamental. I knew every time I wanted to reach for Giana now, it wasn’t because I gave a rat’s ass about someone watching us and reporting back to my ex. It was ...

I’d starved myself of her attention all week long to remind myself, to hammer into my thick skull that she wanted another man — and I was just the foolish punk who agreed to help her ...

I was angry with myself, with her, with Shawn and Maliyah both. I was gutted by the situation, by even the thought of Shawn touching her the way I had been. And yet, if this was it, if this was the only way I could ever have her… I was thankful.

I’d take every stolen moment, every fake kiss, every lesson she’d let me teach her. I’d grind myself down to sand and let her leave me behind in the end if it meant I got to soak up everything that she was right now. A fool, that’s what I was.

She reminded me every chance she could that I was worthy, that I was good, that I was going somewhere.

“So what am I supposed to do?” “You are supposed to play football,” he said, his voice calmer now. “And get your degree. Date pretty girls and get into trouble with your friends. Be a kid, for Christ’s sake. Your mom is a grown woman. She can take care of herself.”

I was speechless. I was mesmerized. And I was rooted to the spot until the moment her eyes flashed behind the cameraman in front of her and landed on me.

“Wow,” she breathed, letting out a low whistle as her eyes ran the length of me. “I knew you could clean up, but I don’t think I’ve ever seen a black tux look this good.”

“You look…” I bit my lip against everything I wanted to say, landing on a quiet, “breathtaking.”

“I think she really misses you, Clay. I think… I think our plan is working.” Her eyes searched mine. “She told a group of the cheerleaders in the bathroom that she wants you back.”

I blinked at her reveal of information, waiting for it to hit me, to strike me in the chest, to fill me up with hope or the sense of pride I felt after winning a game. But I felt nothing.

“Well,” I said, grinning as best I could. “She can eat her heart out when she sees you on my arm tonight.”

“You okay?” “I’m great,” I said, trying to seal that lie with a smile. Riley arched a brow. “That was a low blow from Maliyah.” I shrugged. “It was generous. It’s a great donation for a wonderful cause.” “Cut the shit, Giana. She bid on her ex-boyfriend. On your current boyfriend. And she did it to be a bitch.”

“I’ve watched enough Breaking Bad that I think I could help you get rid of the body.”

“Make that twat cry into her pillow tonight,”

We made it just in time for the band to slow things down, soft melodies and a harmony of voices singing a rendition of “Without You” by The Kid LAROI.

Maliyah wanted him back. And I’d helped him get her back.

She was completely bare beneath it. “Jesus Christ, Kitten,” I groaned,

“You’re so fucking perfect.”

“I’m okay. I’m ready,” she assured me, even as she shook, even as her heart beat loud enough for us both to hear. And maybe she was telling the truth. Maybe she was ready. But I wasn’t.

“I… I can’t,” I croaked. “Not like this.”

I didn’t know how to tell her. I didn’t know how to form the right words to explain that I didn’t want to take her virginity for the purpose of her having sex with another man, that I couldn’t bear to show her how to find pleasure, only to know it would be Shawn she really craved it from. It killed me to admit it, and I wanted so badly to push all my fucking feelings aside to give her what she needed in that moment. But I couldn’t.

“I’m not breaking my promise,” I told her, waiting until her eyes opened again and found mine. And I believed it. I believed in the very center of who I was that I still would take her virginity and show her the map of every way to achieve pleasure in bed. But I wouldn’t do it under the guise of it being fake.

It was the most vulnerable I’d ever been with him, with anyone, and he’d turned me down.

“I love you, Giana. Remember everything is temporary.”

Just a few weeks ago, I would have had a stomach full of butterflies seeing that, feeling him holding me in such an intimate manner. But now, all I could do was think of another pair of hands, larger and rougher and so familiar with me now that they felt like my own.

“Giana, I know I don’t deserve it, but I want to explain why I left Friday night,” I mumbled to myself, reciting the words I’d planned out in my head. “It wasn’t because I didn’t want you. Trust me,” I breathed. “I wanted you so fucking badly I could barely breathe when I left.”

“That motherfucker asked you on a date when you have a boyfriend?” “Well, technically he just asked to hang out. As friends,” she said with a knowing grin. “To watch a movie.”

“What a disrespectful creep.”

“So, wait, you’re just going to go over to his place and hang out?” “Yes.” I blinked. “You realize what that means, right?” “Yes,” she said on a grin, almost like she was exhausted. “That’s what I was trying to say. I mean… what if he wants to… you know.” I couldn’t fucking breathe. “You don’t have to move fast.” “What if I want to?”

My entire plan blew up in a nuclear fashion right before my eyes. I was too late. I’d missed my one shot to tell her how I felt.