Self-Made Boys: A Great Gatsby Remix (Remixed Classics)

by Anna-Marie McLemore

Gatsby loved Daisy. I was Nick. I wasn’t the distant allure of a green light. I was close. I existed in the play script of Gatsby’s life for no reason except to facilitate his reunion with the girl he loved.

I was a moon for him to throw sunlight on. In the glow of Gatsby’s gaze or laugh, I was luminous. When he directed the ray of his attention on my cousin—my beautiful, white-passing cousin—I was a cold and forbidding landscape.

I was desirable for no reason except that I was on his side of the bay. I was more reachable than the ribbon of green light cast on the water.

Some people wore their broken hearts with careful grace. I didn’t. The pieces of mine scraped against everything, and everyone could hear the grinding noise, even if they didn’t know what it was.

“Men love beautiful, useless, expensive things. So I’m meant to be one. I’m not supposed to be anything but a beautiful little fool.”