She seemed to contain two contradictory impulses, like two sides of a coin: a longing to be rich, to dress up and flaunt herself, and feelings of worthlessness that made her want to curl up in the dark where no one could see her. Maybe she should just declare bankruptcy. She had toyed with the idea, but if she went ahead with it, she might be cut off from her precious credit cards for life. There was always the old solution of trying to live within her means—but she’d rather die than do that!
