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Not being invited in is one of the boxes on the “suspicious behavior” bingo form that every copper carries around in their head along with “stupidly overpowerful dog” and being too quick to supply an alibi.
Like young men from the dawn of time, I decided to choose the risk of death over certain humiliation.
woe betide any officer who breaks the chain of evidence, for they will be sat down and have what went wrong with the O. J. Simpson murder trial explained to them at great length. With PowerPoint slides.
we police never like to use real words when we can use an incomprehensible bit of jargon instead.
obviously wondering if we were using the rare good cop/loony cop interrogation technique.
Dining clubs being what posh undergraduates did in the fifties and sixties when they weren’t having doomed love affairs, spying for the Russians, or inventing modern satire.
“Where I’m from, you know, you have snow when you can’t find your car the next morning.”
“My dad was a fairy,” said Zach. “And by that I don’t mean he dressed well and enjoyed musical theatre.”
Toby had sidled up to sit within easy sausage-catching range, just in case.
THE MEDIA response to unusual weather is as ritualized and predictable as the stages of grief.
I was getting the hang of winter driving, which mostly consisted of not going too fast and putting as much room between yourself and the average driver as humanly possible.
Everyone knows about Leinster Road, except perhaps minimum-wage pizza delivery guys,
Leave the police alone in a room for five minutes and we start looking in drawers, locked or otherwise. It’s a terrible habit.
“Where did the money come from?” is one of the three standard police questions, along with “Where were you on the night in question?” and “Why don’t you just make it easy on yourself?”
I’m not claustrophobic. It’s just that my imagination won’t let me forget how much the stuff above my head weighs. And if I start thinking about my breathing I start thinking about how it doesn’t seem to be bringing in enough oxygen.
This is why magic is worse even than quantum physics. Because, while both spit in the eye of common sense, I’ve never yet had a Higgs bosun turn up and try to have a conversation with me.
Was it better to die in happy ignorance or terrified knowledge? The answer, if you’re a Londoner, is that it’s better not to die at all.
I didn’t want to die, but the truth is, the choice isn’t in your hands. Sometimes the only thing you can do is wait, endure, and hope.
there’s three basic types, okay? There’s born, those that choose, and those that are made different.”
