If This Gets Out

by Sophie Gonzales

Obviously I know there are more options than gay or straight, too, but none of the other things have ever felt like they matched me, either.

Do you know that??? Stupidass??

The crushes I got on guys were weird blips, things that would catch me by surprise and cause me confusion, and maybe a little panic, until I forced them out of my mind. Then I’d get a crush on a girl and she’d be all I could think about, and I’d get all swoony and happy and mostly forget about ever micro-crushing on a dude.

That’s called internalized homophobia but ok man

“Actually,” I say carefully. “Don’t freak out. But can we talk about this later? I don’t want to pretend it never happened, but I don’t think I’m ready to talk about it.”

A mature decision, finally. Thank you zachary

The band is in danger because of me. So many people could lose their jobs just because I kissed Ruben and didn’t handle it well. I might have caused the end of the band.

The band is in danger bc Ruben is a dickhead and you’re stupid as hell