The Secrets We Keep (Maven of Mayhem, #1)

by Mila Sin

What doesn't kill you... disappoints me.

Surely not everyone was kung-fu fighting,

Someone out there loves you. Not me. I think you're a cunt.

Honestly, when Jacob finally caught your trail, I thought he'd come in his pants from excitement." Rogue snorts into her mug and shakes out a hand to get the excess tea off. Jacob does not look pleased,

"There was a fucking leaf on my car. That's what led you to me? Me brushing it off? Unbelievable. "

His eyes drop to Noah's hand on my thigh over the blanket, and I witness a bit of color bloom on his freckled cheeks.

Lucas's eyes ping between Noah and me like he's watching a tennis ball crossing the court in a Grand Slam match. His voice is a hushed whisper. "Good God, there are two of them."

when I look up, I notice a tinge of color high on Jacob's stunning cheekbones.

When she said she didn't commit, I didn't expect to feel disappointed in that. I enjoy being in a relationship, taking care of someone, owning them body and soul.

I look curiously at Han, who just shrugs his shoulders and winks. I have an inkling he's got some unaddressed feelings for Jacob, lust being the apparent one, but it's not my place to bring it up.

Jacob comes out, typing away on his phone, dressed in gray sweats, and that's it. Gray motherfucking sweatpants. He has to be doing this on purpose. Doesn't he know those things are like catnip to us?

Likes submissives, my round ass.

Han sits back and looks at the two of us with lust burning in his eyes.

He is so sweet that I'm a little afraid I'd break him with my darkness.

Speaking of Jacob, Ivy totally caught me checking him out. First, in the bedroom when we had our movie night when she moved in with us; then once again, two days ago when we were working out. Yeah, I tend more toward women than men, but damn, he's hot as fuck. You'd have to be dead not to find that man sexy as hell. Even dead, it'd probably be fifty-fifty. I've never acted on my attraction since he's my best friend. We've been with women together but never done anything on our own. I've caught a glance or two over the years that made me wonder if he was having any of the same thoughts about me, but nothing has ever come of it, so I've put that little crush to rest.

The way she submits under his dominating words and his soft touches has me wondering what would happen if he turned those attentions to both of us.

He falls to his knees instantly. "She'll do," he chokes out. Huh, I wonder how she knew he liked a dom.

I need him tonight. I need him badly; I think if I'm denied, I'll cry. I never cry.

"One," he counts out as my senses return to my body. Oh, hell yes, he's going for more.

One benefit of big tits is our bras can hold a ton of shit when we don't want to carry a purse.

Last week, I was admittedly a bit down when Rogue said she didn't do relationships. I am a relationship guy. I'm the best fucking boyfriend ever. But I'll take our non-commitment arrangement over nothing at all.

Something about the three of us just works for me.

It was out of the blue, hot as fuck, and only something I'd briefly considered in the past. Han and I have been friends for a while, but I've always found him attractive. How does one bring that up without it being awkward as hell if he doesn't have the same interest in me? I thought I'd seen a couple looks from him over the years, but I've never been sure if it was just me reading into things.

Somehow, being with both Rogue and Han a few weeks ago seems to have beckoned the notion to the...

After about ten minutes of mindless code, I feel her lips on my neck over my crown tattoo. Her kisses are soft, but then she uses her tongue to lick a line from the collar of my shirt up to my ear. I lose focus entirely and swivel in my chair to face her.

She launches herself at me,

"Jacob, keep talking," she pants out.

"All those years between then and now, I never forgot you. I'm so fucking sorry for how I ended things back then."

"You and Jacob? Is that something I'm getting between?" I sigh. I knew this was coming. I've been caught looking a few times, and I struggle to find the words to say I find them both incredibly attractive, sexy, and alluring, and I'm pretty sure I've been in love with Ivy since I was twenty-one and first spoke to her. I do not want to fuck this up, yet I know a part of me will regret not at least attempting to talk to Jacob about all this.

His mind and his body are just so damn sexy; I swear sometimes my own brain turns to mush,"

What bothers me is that you're having feelings and hiding them. If you ever want to go for it, even if it's while I'm still here, you have my full support.

when the three of us were in bed together, I know I saw something in his eye I'd only glimpsed once or twice in the past.

"Even if he doesn't feel the same, I'll be here to back you up. But fuck, I'm rooting for you guys."

I'm woken in the morning by Jacob's warm, dry hand brushing my arm. I'm half convinced that I'm dreaming of the tattooed hand drifting over my forearm.

Han has been working in the weapons room, cleaning, sorting, taking inventory. You know, the fun stuff. My eyes involuntarily drift over to him when I'm not focused on the monitor during a download, and the way his biceps bunch and flex as he maintains our weapons with that serious look on his face has me doing a double-take.

Thoughts of both her and Han keep invading my mind as I mine data.

While he's generous with his small advances, I'm doing my best to avoid looking at Han. Not because he's done anything wrong. No, it's because with my inhibitions lowered after a few beers, I'm afraid I'll get caught staring at him. Rogue seems to notice this and elbows my ribs suggestively until I'm hunched over laughing.

She just shrugs a shoulder and nods her head in encouragement. Is she...? Yeah, I'm pretty sure she just gave the go-ahead to ogle one of her other lovers.

My hand finds its way to Rogue's hip and connects with Han's hand, where it's settled on the lace of her underwear. His hand slightly tremors as he lifts it and laces our fingers together, laying them down again on Rogue's body. Something settles in my chest, and I murmur a goodnight as my eyes drift shut.

I spy two hands linked and resting on my hip. One tattooed and one bare. Jacob and Han.

Fuck, I need him. I need Jacob too.

I don't want to make things uncomfortable for them, but I've briefly spoken with Han about his feelings for Jacob, and after seeing Jacob's small glances at Han during our game last night, I know they're not one-sided.

Their covert glances give me anxiety, knowing they're both interested but reluctant because of a fear of rejection.

His hand runs down Jacob's chest and abdomen on its way to where we're joined.

I look back at Han and Jacob over Lucas's shoulder just before we leave the room, and I see them with linked hands. Han leans into Jacob, and they share a tender, tentative kiss.

Han: We've just finished up, and we're coming home now. :winky emoji: Han's message to me alleviates the worries I've been fixated on for the last two hours.

Add in the fact that Han and I are in a weird, unfamiliar place at the moment,

Han leaned in and kissed me. It was... amazing. But things are weird now.

"Rogue, we're heading out with you. What's your plan?" Noah surprises me by backing me. I look to the others, but their faces are just as resolute.