People Like Her

by Ellery Lloyd

He had no idea what parenthood would entail, of course. That oppressive sense that nothing can be the same as before. That even once they start sleeping through the night, you won’t be able to, kept awake by the gnawing realisation that never again will you be responsible only for yourself.

Some of us are wonderful. Some of us are wankers. Most of us are a mixture of all these things on any given day.

You make a series of small decisions in your twenties and they slowly bind you until they become a straightjacket. Whether or not to stay for that third drink. Whether to give that guy your number. Whether or not to answer when he rings. Whether or not you fall in love with him. Whether or not you have his babies and when.

The indisputable fact that when a man does even the very basics of childcare, however awkwardly, ineptly or begrudgingly, he gets applauded for it. Whereas when a woman walks down the street with a baby the only time anyone even notices is if they think she is doing something wrong.