The privileged groups turn their gaze from the pain. In the face of systemic racism, we say, “Look how far they’ve come”; in the face of cultural genocide, “They need to assimilate”; in the face of trauma, “Isn’t it great that they are resilient.” It is so easy to create an “other.” Us-and-them is deeply ingrained in our neurobiology; it’s what makes connectedness a double-edged sword.
