Gravity (Wilde Boys, #1)

by Sara Cate

“You will go with him,” he adds, and my cheeks flush. The thought of meeting Nash’s grandparents makes me nauseous. “You want me to meet your parents?” I ask, as if he spoke without really thinking. “Of course, why not?” “I’m not really the girl rich boys bring home to meet the family.” “Why?” he asks, looking up at me. “Because you’re a stripper?” “Yes,” I reply. “Well, then just try to keep your clothes on when my mother serves the turkey.” “Very funny,” I snap. “I’m being serious.”

“Yeah, why not? It’s better than Alistair trying to teach me to fly. Maybe if I tell him you’re flying up north next week, he’ll leave me alone.” Nash’s brow furrows as he glances over at me. “He’s still trying to teach you?” “I told him to rot in hell...basically.”

assumed I was just a young girl trailing around his island in a bikini, another meaningless distraction, but with every interaction between us, I feel it shift. I want to believe it’s more than that. Why on earth do I want to believe it’s more than that?

“I’m going to let go, and I want you to hold us steady.” “Alistair, no!” I panic. “I’ve got you, baby. Nothing is going to happen to us.”

“Just keep it straight and steady.” “Okay.” I gulp down the nerves tingling my skin, and it feels like my body is on fire. The vibration under my seat, the hand on my leg, the shaft in my hand. I’m alive, needy, and horny as fuck. If he doesn’t move his hand, I can’t promise I won’t try to fuck it at any moment.

“You okay?” he asks. “Yeah...your hand,” I stutter. “It’s distracting me.” My voice shakes with nerves as I glance down at his touch. “Oh,” he responds, but he doesn’t pull away. Staring down, I see out of the corner of my eye as he bites his lip, as if he’s thinking—contemplating his next move. Then, he dances his fingers along the sensitive skin of my inner thigh as he says, “Best to learn with a little distraction I think.”

“Fuck, I want to kiss you right now,” he growls into the mic. My heart practically flies out of my chest. His hand is kneading my inner thigh, and I can’t stop shifting in my seat. When his mouth lands on my bare arm, planting warm wet kisses against my skin, I let out a strangled cry.

“Wait, can people...hear us?” I ask in a breathy cry. “No, it’s a closed system.” Then, he pulls my panties aside and slowly pushes a finger in my soaking heat. I barely manage to hold the helicopter steady as a pleasure-laced cry leaves my lips. “God, I wish they could,” he says as he pumps his finger in and out. “Alistair, let’s land this thing, please,” I beg, my hips nearly lifting off the seat. “And miss the chance to see you come at ten thousand feet?”

“I hated thinking about you with him,” he says, and I swear my heart stops. “Why? You’re the one who told me—” “I know. Calm down. I just...never mind.” He swims across the pool, and I watch his bare back glide through the water as my blood pumps furiously through my veins. When his head pops up, I push him for answers. “What were you going to say?” I ask. He flips his wet hair back out of his face, and my eyes trail to the muscles of his arms and chest. “Nothing,” he says. “Just that...something about it turned me on.”

“Something about me being with your dad turned you on?” He laughs. “Yeah...like we’re fighting over you or something.” “I’m not a fucking prize, Nash. This isn’t some primal mating ritual. Neither of you are going to win me.”

“You’re not a prize, but you can be bought, Zara. He bought you with money, remember. What can I buy you with?”

would strip you of every single piece of clothing and stare at your naked body in my bed, committing it to memory forever.” I watch as she swallows but doesn’t look away. Her hands squeeze mine, urging me for more. “I would kiss every single inch of your body. Then I would make you come as many times as I could in one night—with my hands, my mouth, and my cock.”

“Then, I would fuck you, Zara. I would fuck you hard because I know that’s how you like it.” Her lip lifts in a quirk, and I rub my thumb across the back of her hand. “I would fuck you hard because that’s how I like it too.”

“When did this happen? I never saw this coming,” she whispers. I want to tell her that this happened a long time ago for me. Four years to be exact. The first time she stepped foot on my island, I was ruined. I made a promise to myself that I would never touch her because I knew then she’d fucking ruin me. She would be my downfall, my biggest distraction, and I was right. Even before we touched, I was helpless.

“When I’m with you, it doesn’t hurt so much,” she whispers, and suddenly I’m swallowing knives. She’s in my goddamn head, stealing the words off the tip of my tongue. The pain never fully goes away, but it is eclipsed by the brightness of her eyes. “I know, baby.”

“I don’t need a reminder that this isn’t real to you. I remember it every fucking second,” he whispers against my mouth. “Is it real to you, Nash? You said yourself you don’t want to care about me, remember? So tell me this is real to you and I’ll tell you it’s real to me.” “Tell me you haven’t touched him, first.” It’s like a bullet to my heart.

“Tell me you’d give up the money and stay with me,” he continues. I don’t answer as he speaks, his body overwhelming mine on the bed. After a moment longer of silence, he leans in. “Exactly. I know whatever this is between us is fucked up, Zara, but I’m so fucking stuck on you anyway. I can’t seem to convince myself to let you go, but where the fuck do we go from here?”

“Have you fucked him yet?” he asks as his hips grind against my core. Heat shoots up my spine. “No,” I answer breathlessly. His eyes close as he lets out a groan. “Do you want to?” He grinds against me again. I know I could lie, but I don’t. Mostly because I hate lying, but also because this is what he wants. He’s asking me this for a reason. “Yes,” I moan.

“Do you still want me?” he asks. My answer comes out quicker this time. “Yes.”

“Open your eyes,” Nash commands. “Don’t think about him.” I gasp. “I’m not.” He slams into me harder. “Yes, you were.” “Nash,” I answer in a whimper on another thrust. But I realize Nash doesn’t respond to pleas or logic. He responds to honesty. So I sit up on my elbows and put my face inches from his. “If you don’t want me to think about anyone else, then I guess you better be the one to make me come.” “Oh you little brat,”

“Because for one nice minute today I felt what having a normal girlfriend would feel like, but then I remember you’re not here to be my girlfriend, and you’d probably be here with him.”

“Can you please get over the fact that I’m getting money for one second and just accept that you’re the closest fucking thing I have to family, and today was really fucking nice. And everything between me and your dad is in your head, Nash.” “Don’t lie to me,” he mumbles.

“Giselle is a peasant girl, and she falls in love with the prince, but he gets engaged to someone else.” “What a dick,” he mutters, and I laugh. “Giselle goes mad and dies of a broken heart. She becomes a ghost.” “And haunts him I hope.” I silently laugh again. “Actually, she saves him.”

“Why? Why would she want to meet me?” “Because I told her you were a dancer and a friend of mine, and she said she wanted to meet you.” He has so much confidence it’s unsettling. Why doesn’t he understand this from my perspective? “I’m not a dancer, Alistair. I’m a stripper. I don’t belong on that stage. You can’t take a stripper to meet the prima ballerina.” My voice comes out in a harsh whisper, and the words slice something in me.

“Why? Because I’m here with you?” I snap back, and it feels like I'm talking back to a parent. “Yes, because you’re here with me. You think I’d bring just anyone here? You think you’re just anyone?” “What does that mean? Who am I to you?” I whisper, tears filling my eyes. Shoving my body against the wall, and pulling my face toward his, he attacks my lips with his as he answers. “You’re everything to me.”

Alistiar Wilde is taking down his walls, even if only for a moment, for me. The man who doesn’t date, shoves his feelings away, and tries to buy his way out of anything uncomfortable is offering me his heart.

“You make me feel good, Zara, and I haven’t felt good in a long fucking time. When I’m with you, it hurts a little less. It doesn’t go away, but I don’t hate life so much when you look at me like you’re looking at me right now,”

“Am I allowed to be happy, Zara? Or is this my punishment? Loving you if I can’t have you.”

“What exactly do I deserve? Loving my son’s girlfriend? I don’t deserve anything good.” Grabbing his cheeks, I put his face in direct view of mine. “I’ve told you, Alistair. I don’t belong to Nash. I love him, yes, and I’m here to help him too, but I belong to you just as much as I belong to him.” “Do you hear how fucked up that is?” he says with a laugh, and I kiss him. “I don’t care how fucked up it is,” I mumble against his mouth. “Neither do I.”

I don’t deserve this, I tell myself. It’s like I want to keep reminding him that he got me, not Emma. He wanted the gold, but he got the bronze. We look the same but one shines a little brighter.

“Remember when I told you what I would do to you if I found you in my bed? I told you I would strip you down and stare at you. Do you remember what comes next?” Biting my lip, I nod. “You said you would make me come as many times as you could with your mouth and your hands.”

“Then what?” he asks, stroking himself while I play between my legs. My breathing has turned into a slow pant as my orgasm starts to build. I could just watch him work his impressive length all day, but I know what’s coming, and I want it. “Then, you would fuck me.” “How?” he asks, his own voice growing thick. “Hard,” I answer, high-pitched and on the edge. Quickly he snatches away my hand before I can finish myself off. “That’s my job.”

“Don’t move for a moment,” I whisper as he lays his body on top of mine, my lips against his neck. “Just be inside me for a moment.” “I’m not going anywhere, baby.”

“You’re crying.” Smiling up at him, I try to memorize this moment. Pulling his face down, I don’t respond. I press my lips to his mouth and I wish my heart wasn’t being torn in two at the moment.

“What did you do?” he spits at me. “Why did you let her go with me?” I counter. “My question first,” he replies. Running my hands through my hair, I don’t even feel the biting cold wind through my shirt. Right now, I’m blazing hot anyway. “What do you think I did, Nash?” He clenches his jaw and turns away.

“When I woke up this morning she was gone, and how can we be surprised? I was paying her to be here. It was never real to her. You let her go like you didn’t care about her.” “You’re wrong. It was real,” he yells back. “Oh bullshit, Nash. You practically pushed her into my arms, and you knew exactly what was going to happen between us. You just love having something to hate me for.”

“I never run out of things to hate you for.” “Fine, hate me. But don’t take it out on her. I’m sorry I acted on my feelings, but you’ve been dragging her along, making h...

“I do care about her,” he answers through grit teeth. “I didn’t want to, but I do.” “Bullshit.” “This is all your fault,” he says, stepping toward me, and for the first time in our lives, I’m waiting for my son to punch me. I deserve it, and if he d...

“Do you know why I found her at the strip club that night?” he says quietly, and my pulse quickens, thinking about her at that place. I’m afraid to ask. “Why?” “Because I remembered how much you liked her. Every time she came to the house with Emma, I saw how you watched her. We all did. You were obsessed with her. I almost forgot she existed and when I needed a way to hurt you, I found her, and I fucked her. I made sure people got pictures of us together and posted them online so you’d see. I wanted you to know I still hated you.”

“She always liked me, but I never even considered her. So it was easy to get her to open her legs for me that first time.” This time I’m the one clenching my fists, and I want to hit those thoughts right out of his head. “I never expected you to bring her to Del Rey, but I figured it was perfect. I could make you hurt more.”

shrouded in pain, tears filling his eyes. “Why would you bring her for me if you wanted her for yourself?” “I never wanted her for myself, Nash. I wanted her for you.” “Why?” “Because you’re my son. When she was around, you fucking smiled. And not while you were drunk or to bring me pain. For a minute, you looked goddamn happy.” “I was happy,”

“I know you think she was only there for the money, but I promise you, she wasn’t. It was more than that to her. We’re her family, and Del Rey is her home. What else could possibly matter?” I think I know what my son is suggesting by the way his eyes won’t meet mine, but I have to replay every word to be sure we’re on the same page. When he finally looks up at me, there’s less tension in his shoulders. “Fuck, maybe we already blew it, but it’s worth a shot. We have to get her back.”

All Zara wants is to feel like she’s not being torn in two. Whether or not this is the way to do it, I don’t know, but he was right. It's worth a shot.

“Del Rey is your home, and we are your family. If you can’t choose, then we won’t make you.” Alistair says it like it’s so easy, like my heart will be protected so long as I don’t have to pick one over the other. “You’re not joking,” I say, as my laughter turns back into tears. “No,” Nash says finally.

“So, you’re not going to be mad when I sleep with him?” I ask, and I see him flinch. “I might be a little angry,” he answers flatly, and I know exactly what that means. We can go back to the way things were. Sex being how we punish each other, punish ourselves. How we shed the years of pain and frustration until all that’s left is us. “And you?” I ask, looking at Alistair. “You don’t have a problem with sharing me?” “I’m just trying to keep my family together.” He says it with so much confidence, for the first time I see the father in him.

This is about her thinking she could leave me without so much as a goodbye, like what we had meant nothing. It’s about feeding something inside of me that only has a taste for Zara. And right now, it’s fucking insatiable.

I try to remember the moment everything changed for me. Was it her meeting my grandparents? No, before that. Before the conversation on the boat. Before the pool. Before I found her sleeping in the guest house on that very first day. Everything changed for me the night at the club and I found a girl as broken and sad as I was. A girl whose pain mirrored mine. From that minute, everything with Zara changed for me.

“If you want me to be gentle, you better say something now.” My voice is unrecognizable, deep and full of something I’ve never heard come out me before. Rage. Passion. Pride. This woman is mine, and I’m going to remind her of that.

“Let him hear you scream for me,” I whisper against her mouth. “Nash,” she whimpers, and before she can say another word, I toss her across the bed.

“You’ve fucked up, Zara.” Her breath is heavy and her entire body moves with each inhale and exhale. “You left me,” I say, snapping the belt. Her breath hitches. “You fucked him. Then you stripped for those strangers.” I snap it again. “You want to strip? Then, you’ll strip for me,”