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Darling sin, why is it, my dear that I can love you this much when you bring me to tears
I’d waited what felt like forever for this day. In reality, it was probably more like a few years. Ever since Jude had nonchalantly handed me a pen I’d dropped in chemistry, the seed had been planted. He hadn’t even looked at me, but when I’d stammered out a thank you, he’d smirked down at his tablet. That smirk had followed me to sleep and had visited almost every one of my dreams since.
It was kind of magical how enough time and distance from something that once broke your heart could open your eyes and make you feel stupid for even caring in the first place.
A spare pair of panties in case I should get lucky, check. The latter was most definitely a little optimistic. I mean, Jude had just broken up with his long-term girlfriend. But rebound sex was a thing, and I wasn’t opposed to the idea. Virgin or not.
My eyes were doing this weird thing that could only be summed up as indecision. They weren’t sure where to remain or what to absorb the most of. His hair—god, so thick. The straight disarray of it perfect—not too long up top and not too short on the sides. Those lips, a little plump, but just enough that I knew they’d fit between mine so seamlessly. He might have lived next door, but I’d hardly seen him since the summer. Only small glimpses like this at school, if I was lucky.
The last time I was standing this close was in the cafeteria line at the start of the school year. It had been raining, and I’d watched as drops of water slid down his neck to dampen the collar of his shirt. He wore that same shirt now, as did all the guys at school, but I was willing to bet it was a size larger, judging by the broader expanse of his shoulders and upper arms. The black cotton was only half-buttoned, exposing a gray T-shirt beneath. Lean with muscles that shifted in his beautiful arms and a face sculpted from stone, he was an Adonis. An eighteen-year-old god.
His gray slacks hung low from his waist. I could tell when he lifted his bag over his shoulder, granting a mouthwatering glimpse of a defined hip. To touch it, trace it, and oh my god, to lick—
Cory slapped a hand over my mouth. Jude was openly assessing me now, his expression unreadable. “Excuse her,” Cory said. “She took some of her mom’s Valium by accident, thinking it was her iron pill.” I tried to pry her fingers from my face to no avail. Jude smirked in a way that spoke of sinister whispers heatedly delivered to your ear in the dark. “Remove your hand. I’d like to hear what else she has to say.” That voice… so silken with its slight accent and sensuously deep.
Jude was on the balcony that faced mine, a steaming mug of something in his hand, staring at the ground as he slowly paced. But even better than this rare sighting… he was shirtless. Packed muscle shifted in his abdomen when he lifted his free hand to drag it through his tousled hair. His skin gleamed golden in the afternoon light, highlighting every defined inch of his muscular biceps and taut shoulders.
That straight nose, the symmetrical arches of his cheekbones, and that shadowed jawline… perfect. He was too perfect for real life. Too perfect to be standing before me. But he was, and I could smell him, study him, all I wanted.
I closed the distance before he could finish talking. Rising onto my toes, even in these torturous things us women called high heels, I pressed my mouth to his. It was warm, smooth, and I kept my lips on his even when his mouth parted. Fireworks exploded behind my squeezed shut eyes, and my heart cartwheeled, jumping into my throat.
A brass door handle dug into my back, but I didn’t care. I clasped both sides of his face and parted his lips with my tongue. A groan left him, deep and rumbling, evoking a shiver. His hands found my hips, pulling my chest flush with his. His tongue skirted over mine, and I heard him whisper, “Have you ever kissed someone before?” I was too far gone to give a damn about embarrassment, so I shook my head and carefully licked his upper lip. Another groan, this one softer, accompanied a harsh exhale that heated my skin and tongue. “I find that hard to believe, but I also don’t.” He squeezed my
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Grabbing the side of my face, he angled my head back for his tongue to sweep into my mouth and lay waste to every dream I’d ever had. For they weren’t coming true, they were being decimated one by one, replaced with the sweetest type of nightmare I’d never dare run screaming from.
His palm was warm and so large, so right as it gently but firmly held my head still for his tongue and lips to assault mine. Down the rabbit hole I fell, twirling and internally screaming as my wildest imaginations became a reality. He was spearmint and heat, unyielding and exploratory. Control oozed from his every rough breath, his touch, and in the mating of our mouths. His tongue plunged and stroked, his teeth clamped and dragged, and my heart became a savage beast as I clung to him with the hope of this never ending.
Nose deep in a book, Red walked over to the glittering purple countertop and took a seat without looking up once as though she had memorized the path, which spoke of familiarity. Jesus Christ. Had Silas known she frequented this shack? What a prick. It was no secret, thanks to my lovely ex-girlfriend, that I’d made out with the girl everyone was dubbing as the school’s biggest nobody. Yeah, so I hadn’t seen Red around much, or maybe I had, and I’d just never cared to really look, but the fact she wasn’t somebody didn’t make a whole lot of sense to me. My eyes ran down her back, flooded with
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A woman with graying blond hair exited the door marked for staff only, and with an affectionate smile, she reached out to lay a finger atop Red’s book to slowly push it down. She laughed. Not the older woman, but Red, and fuck if I didn’t get an instant semi. Raspy and far deeper than her candied-soft voice, it fluttered across the room to target me square in the dick. Something tightened inside my chest, and I downed some coffee to rid the feeling.
“Red,” I said, annoyed and excited. Annoyed she had the audacity to approach me, and annoyed that things began to throb downstairs. Chocolate powder clung to her red lips. “Hi.” Lips I’d kissed. Lips I’d licked. Lips I’d nipped. Lips that’d look so good wrapped around me, those big blue eyes searching mine to make sure she was doing a good job as she sucked me off. Fuck. I tore my eyes away from that damn mouth and glared at her.
Traipsing naked into my dark room, I saw my phone light up where I’d tossed it on the nightstand. I peeled back the black silken sheets and fell onto the bed with my phone and squinted at the screen in the dark.
Sleeping naked? Hot...
Red tumbled to the marble floor, her tablet flying across it and sliding into some dude’s leather shoes. Her long legs splayed, skirt flying up to grant us a brief preview of lace-trimmed black panties bedecked with apricot polka dots. They hugged half her ass, and annoyance festered when I realized every wanker in this shithole, including myself, could now see just how perfect those creamy globes were. She muttered something while sitting up and pulling her skirt down, and pushed her long curled locks from her face.
Pondering why it’d taken me so long to notice the second tier’s daughter in the first place, flashes of that ass and her luscious mouth infiltrated.
“Fern,” he said, soft and without that dark humor. “Come to me.” My name had never sounded so good, and my breath froze at the velvet loaded demand. Toes scrunching over the door runner, I forced myself to stay where I was. “How do I know you won’t do something horrible again?” I didn’t know why I bothered asking after what he’d done, after he’d embarrassed me the way he had, but I did know I still wanted him. I’d probably always want him. Maybe I needed to let him mess with me enough to rid that desire.
And as I stepped back inside, slipping my feet into my flip-flops before ducking back out and taking the stairs to the verandah below, I remembered how hot the shame of being his victim had felt. It singed in a way that would leave a mark, but his actions also validated something I’d been curious about since that stolen kiss outside the dorms at school. I’d managed to crawl beneath his skin, and call me desperate—we already knew I was—but I’d much rather live there than not exist to him at all.
Who was I kidding? I’d absolutely still be here, chasing a poltergeist intent on mocking me. A sexy as fuck poltergeist, I thought, coming to a dead stop when I rounded the corner to find Jude leaning in the doorway to what I guessed had to be his bedroom. Shirtless and pantless. Wicked as sin. His arms unfolded from his chest, his pecs and abs twitching as he straightened. “So glad you could make it.”
Struggling to keep my eyes from his charcoal briefs, his very tight briefs, I blinked and cleared my throat. “Wouldn’t miss it for the world.”
Standing on the edge of a dark brown low-pile rug, I absorbed my fascination’s lair. His bed was dark, almost as black as the floor-to-ceiling shelving lining two of the walls. Inside them lived so many books it was not so much a bedroom but half a library. I swore I had a mini orgasm. My feet carried me across the rug, bypassing the monstrous four-poster bed with its luscious-looking inky black bedding to a set of glittering spines. I reached out to trail my finger over them, but a warm burst of air, coupled with the firm heat meeting my hip, stopped me.
His lips ghosted over my shoulder, featherlight. I felt my knees buckle. As if he could, too, his large hand squeezed my hip, the other trailing fingers down my arm. “Can I touch you?” The question both shocked and thrilled me. Shocked because I expected him to take, wanted him to, and thrilled because, well… duh. “Please do,” I said, thinking I might perish on the spot when his hand crawled under the worn cotton of my tank, sliding across my stomach.
His hand crawled up, up, up until it was wrapped firmly around my breast. A harsh squeeze accompanied a harsher rush of expelled breath. “Christ,” he muttered. “It fills my hand completely.” Then I felt him. He shifted closer, aligning the bottom half of his body with mine.
Across my lips, his whispering laughter traveled as his head lowered to mine. “Let me catch you,” he murmured, nudging my chin back with his nose to kiss my neck. “Albeit, rather belatedly…” He parted my legs, his hand slipping inside my sleep shorts and panties. Oxygen fled my lungs on a hoarse breath. Fingers. Thick, gentle fingers were touching me, parting me. My thighs both widened and clenched on impulse, and I heard him mutter something that sounded like, “Holy mother of sweet hell,” before his mouth latched onto my neck and sucked, hard.
Sweet hell was right. Anxious, I laid there, wanting to coast along the pleasure he was wringing from my body. He introduced me to feelings and sensations I’d never felt before, and all he was doing was touching me. Yet terror at what he might think of me being all wet, of my innocence, and wondering what it was I should be doing, kept me stiff as a board.
“Relax,” he whispered, releasing my neck and pressing soft kisses to the curve of my shoulder. “You feel so good, Little Red. Breathe and allow me to make you feel just how good.” At hearing those words, feeling their honesty with every touch of his fingers and lips, I was a pile of goo within seconds. My stomach tightened, and an ...
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Those bottle-green eyes were heated and hooded. His nostrils flared a little. His hair sprinkled down over his forehead. Tentatively, I reached up to push it back, and he groaned. He wanted me. Not only did he want me, but I could feel the tension coiling inside him, the hunger he was keeping leashed. He wanted to devour me. And so he did. He kissed me, hard and deep, and then he was between my legs, his hand leaving to rid me of my shorts and panties.
“Jude,” I said or tried to say. For it was so choked, I didn’t think he heard me over the sound of his throaty groan when he spread my thighs apart. I stiffened again, about to sit up, but then his mouth was on me, his tongue doing exactly what his fingers had been just moments ago. I melted and mewled, stars bursting among the shadows on the molded ceiling. “Shit.” His laughter rumbled against my skin, his hands wrapped around my thighs, and then I started to shake. I’d given myself enough orgasms to know what was happening, but that still didn’t prepare me for the onslaught of pleasure that
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My hand slapped over my mouth as a garbled moan left it, and my legs tried to squeeze Jude’s beautiful head. I hadn’t realized I’d closed my eyes until I opened them to find him gazing down at me once more. “You’re fucking delicious.” I was breathing as though I’d just ran a half marathon. His eyes darted to my breasts, and he ...
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That was nice and all—no, it was fucking incredible—but not as good as kissing him. And I so desperately wanted to kiss him, especially after the gift he’d just bestowed on me. So I did. I grabbed his head and brought it to mine, my taste buds exploding with the taste of myself and his toxic, drugging flavor. I was on his tongue, the roof of his mouth, and it was heady enough that spasms erupted between my legs. Jude pulled away, breathing heavy with his forehead scrunched. “I just at...
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“Don’t assume you know me just because I’m inexperienced.” A brow rose. “Oh?” I moved his mouth back to mine, kissing each corner of it before sucking on his lower lip. “I might not know much, but I already know if it involves you, I’m going to love it.” He stiffened for a heartbeat, and I heard him swallow before he rasped to my mouth, “You’re going to be my ruination, Red.” We both knew that wasn’t true. We both knew he’d be mine instead.
He rolled, taking me with him and running his hands down my sides, his mouth fused to mine. Desperate and growling low, he sucked, and he swiped, and he stole brand new pieces of me I never knew existed with every passing moment. Gripping my ass, he pressed up into me, rocking my damp center over the bulging, hot member inside his briefs.
Bloody hell. What was her deal? It was like she knew I’d stuck my tongue in Red’s cunt last Friday night. Remembering the way she’d moaned, shocked and damn near hysterical as she came on my mouth…
I rolled to my back, sighing. Ever the faithful idiot would probably be printed upon my headstone when I eventually let the boy next door officially destroy me. Boy, pfft. He was all man, his scent and the overbearing carnal presence of him imprinted upon me forevermore. The feel of sinew wrapped in silken skin was trapped within the skin of my fingertips, and the taste of me on his tongue burned into my taste buds. What are you afraid of, pretty Red? I’d walked right to him and handed him the torch to light my heart aflame.
He opened the side gate for me, then the door of his waiting Range Rover on the other side. Swallowing, I walked over. Before I climbed in, his hot breath warmed my cheek. “Are you thinking of my lips around your clit?” I nearly squealed, a shocked laugh erupting. “Well, I am now.”
I hadn’t brought my phone with me. I had cash in my bra and a key hidden out front of the gates. I’d thought I’d be hitching a ride home with Cory, not the guy who sometimes hated me enough to break my heart. For a moment, I wondered how many times he’d need to break it for me to quit coming back. I wasn’t sure I wanted to know.
I bit my lip and tugged at the lace hem of my dress, eyeing the pointed toes of my boots. Bare feet and denim wrapped ankles appeared, and then his finger tipped up my chin. “No one else gets to fuck with you. Only me. That’s why I came.” Before I could demand that he maybe not fuck with me again, his lips were on mine. I released my dress but wasn’t sure where to put my hands. His finger left my chin, his hand framed my face, and his other met my lower back. “Red,” he whispered into my mouth. “Just fucking touch me.”
“Okay,” I said, but it was muffled by his tongue when he angled my head, fingers threading into my hair as his tongue slid against mine. He really shouldn’t have given me permission. My hands became detectives, roaming and searching every inch of his back, slipping under his sweatshirt to discover there was no T-shirt beneath. I moaned my approval, fingers following the muscular curves on either side of his spine. Letting his mouth do as it wished, I just held on and enjoyed the stomach-dipping, heart-thrashing ride.
I didn’t protest when he grabbed my dress and lifted. Our lips broke momentarily, my hair falling back over my shoulders to tickle my half-exposed breasts. Jude glanced at the cream bra and matching satin panties, then growled when his mouth returned to mine. “I fucking love your mouth,” he rasped, then bent low, lips dragging over my chin to my chest. “And these fucking tits…” He to...
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With his mouth rubbing over mine, he maneuvered me back to his bed, releasing me to remove his hooded jacket and jeans. I stared at his thick thighs, and I kind of wanted to know what it would feel like to rub myself over them. He left his briefs on, but I was too afraid to ask why as he threw himself over the bed to his back and beckoned for me.
Still wearing my panties, I crawled over him, loving the way his eyes glued to my breasts. “Aren’t we all?” I whispered, straddling one of those thighs just as I’d wanted to. Eyes hooded, he watched me, unsure where to keep them as I ran my fingers through my hair, scrunching and releasing it while I rocked over him. “My dick is about to punch a hole through my briefs.” His throat bobbed. “Does that feel good?” “So good.” I dropped my hair. “Why don’t we free him then?” I had no idea where such bravery had come from, but I was glad it’d arrived. I wanted to see it. “Him?” Jude asked, a glint
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Throaty and soft, he murmured, “You’re really getting the hang of this whole kissing thing.” I smiled against his mouth and then dragged his luscious bottom lip into mine and sucked. Expelling a rough exhale, he smacked my ass, and I yelped. “Now sit on my fucking face.”
His breathing warmed the satin, his nose rubbing. My hands slapped against the thick wooden post to aid in holding me up. For which I was thankful when he grumbled something I couldn’t hear and then licked. I hadn’t realized it would feel just as good with a barrier between my skin and his expert mouth. My head fell, my hair tickling my back as I got lost in the type of torture I never wanted to escape from.
I was teetering, every muscle tightening in preparation, when cold hit my wet flesh. “You’re bare.” Disorientated and wishful, I had no idea what he was talking about. “Huh?” “Your cunt.” A swipe of his tongue emphasized his thick words. “Fuck, it’s so pretty.” “I waxed,” I admitted, and it’d hurt like seven types of hell. I’d do it again, though, if it meant I’d have his mouth on me.
He opened them wide. Careful yet curious fingers spread me, trailing through me, exploring. “I’m going to make you come, Red, but first…” He reached my opening, the tip of his finger circling it as his low words washed over me. “First, I’m going to become so well acquainted that it’ll be imprinted in my mind forever.” Forever. I loved that word. I loved it way too much.
His fingers toyed, and soon, his tongue returned. Within a minute, I was trapping his head between my legs, my fingers tugging at his hair. “Holy shit.” Jude was chuckling, pressing kisses to my swollen center. “Even quicker than last time.”
