Me: I’m going into a house I’ve never been in before. If I don’t text you back in an hour, call the cops. The address is 555 Rose Hill Lane. I stopped, thought about it, and sent her another message. Me: Don’t invite anyone I don’t like to my funeral. Then I sent her another one. Me: And don’t forget to drop my laptop in a swamp if something happens. I thought about it for another second. Me: And don’t forget you’re the only one I want to clean out my nightstand. Wear gloves and don’t judge me.
