Ayoade on Top

by Richard Ayoade

In 1971, the US-based National Airlines took out an advertisement featuring a stewardess looking straight at the lens. The type above reads, ‘Hi, I’m Cheryl. Fly me.’ What the advert doesn’t make clear is how that would be possible. Cheryl appears to have none of the qualities required that would allow her to travel unaided through the atmosphere without touching the ground, let alone if she were saddled with an overweight and horny businessman. Unless they’re tucked discreetly out of sight, there is no indication in the photo that Cheryl has wings or fins. Presuming she is no less heavy than air, we know that for Cheryl to achieve any kind of aerodynamic lift she’d need a propeller or a jet engine. And given there is no outward indication that Cheryl is an airbound insect, her only option for flight would be if she were launched ballistically as a human cannonball.