Where the Lost Wander

by Amy Harmon

“It is. It is the suffering of love. Every parent feels it. It is the suffering of being unable to shield or save. It is not love if it doesn’t hurt.”

“It’s worth it, you know.” “What is, Jennie?” “The pain. It’s worth it. The more you love, the more it hurts. But it’s worth it. It’s the only thing that is.”

That’s what hope feels like: the best air you’ve ever breathed after the worst fall you’ve ever taken. It hurts.

John says Wolfe freed me. I couldn’t save him, and I couldn’t keep him. I couldn’t take him, and I couldn’t leave him. So he had to leave me.

:’(

I realize now that life is just a continual parting of the ways, some more painful than others.

He’s like Ma that way, Washakie, with his dreams and premonitions. When we saw him again the following year, I was rounded with child, and the night I delivered, there were tracks in the snow.