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We might have lived apart, but we’re still the same. We still look at each other like we’re mirrors, like we’re halves split into two different bodies.
We’ll always find our way back to each other. After all, we’re…” “One.”
Never look back. If you don’t look back, you run faster. If you don’t look back, no one will catch you.
אשת לוט מאמי
Maybe it’s that something else, or maybe it’s the fact I have no one here except for him. I just don’t want to be alone. The company of a monster is better than no company. In the haziness of sleep, I murmur, “Don’t…leave.” “You owe me. I’m not leaving anymore.”
“He’s not the help,” I hiss at Bree. “When you’re at my house, you respect everyone in it.”
Reina Ellis. Captain of the cheerleading squad. Doesn’t go out without makeup. Heir to Daddy’s fortune. And engaged to a jerk who couldn’t care less about me. I really want to sit down with Old Reina and discuss her options. Surely she could’ve done better.
“When I speak, you listen.”
חיייייי בסרטטטטטטטטטט
“I own you. Every single part of you. You might have tried to escape, but that won’t happen again. I don’t know what kind of game you’re playing this time, but I’ll figure it out and you’ll lose like you do every fucking time.”
Don’t talk. When I speak, you listen. When I order, you obey.
אולי תתאבד
“You’re a psycho.” I breathe out, my heart stammering. It keeps beating and pulsing like crazy, as if it’ll soon stop and is using up all of its energy. Asher’s lips pull up in a cruel smirk. “It takes one to know one, my ugly monster.”
You’re my property and I touch you whenever and however I damn fucking please.”
די יסחלה
“That’s not how it works.” “This is a free country. I won’t stay engaged to a freak like you.”
I stop and face them. “Walk beside me.” “Uh…we don’t do that.” Lucy bites her cheek. “You and Bree are always in front,” another says. “Well, that changes now. I’m not your mama duck.”
The moment Sebastian notices Naomi, he abandons his friends and joins her on the edge of the fountain.
“I never thought I’d live to see Reina Ellis upset.” “Of course I get upset, I’m a human.” “More like a monster who survives on being cunning, manipulating others, and screwing people’s lives over.”
“You told us not to cry in public or you’d have us clean the toilet.” Holy shit. I was a dictator.
God, I feel as evil as Hitler. Wait, maybe I was Hitler in a previous life. After all, we’re both dictators with a tendency for craziness.
I stare at the afternoon sun in the middle of the sky and lift my hand as if I can reach it. Maybe if I can, I’ll box it up and use it whenever that gloomy cloud takes control of my head.
“Promise me you’ll protect yourself. Even if I’m not there, you’ll be safe.” “No, Reina. No.” “I’ll be safe, too. We’ll meet again. Promise.” “I promise.”
He has the most beautiful eyes, my savior. Green like a dark forest, but also like a tropical sea during a storm. He’s a dream and a nightmare, my savior, like darkness and light. He’s Asher.
I felt that yearning to fall and end it all—but Asher stopped it. He…breathed life into me again—against my will.
“It’s like you’re an entirely new person.”
“Screw you all.” I ignore them and head to the stairs. “They taste awesome, Rei-Rei,” Owen shouts behind me. “Un-screw you, Owen.” I smile without turning around. He barks out a laugh. “Pretty sure that’s not even a word.” “It is now.” I hear him cough as if someone elbowed him. “What? She’s cool.”
Then she shows me a picture of Asher wrapping an arm around a guy with intimidating gray eyes. A blonde girl snuggles in his lap.
“Aiden King. He’s like Asher’s closest friend in England.
“Pity he’s married. I swear all the good ones are.” I wonder why he got married so young.
Jesus, it’s like you had a personality transplant.” “I’ll take that as a compliment.”
Reina Ellis wasn’t born to be trampled on.
One thing’s for certain: I’ll never raise the white flag. I’ll pick my battles instead.
“I’ll gut you if you return to your old bitchy self.” I smirk. “Is that a promise?” She shakes her head. “That blunt-force trauma really did a number on you.”
“Hear that, Bree?” I tell her. “Go fetch the table.” She doesn’t move, her face growing red with exertion. “Reina, you—” I slam my tray in front of hers, shutting her up. I lean forward and snarl, “Move.”
“Didn’t you say you don’t want anything to do with me?” “You keep barging in anyway.” He licks the shell of my ear one more time. “It’s time I trap you.”
He’s like a magnet and I’m helpless steel. He’s the fire and I’m the moth waiting to be burned.
If I had this man, I wouldn’t think about cheating on him.
But then again, Old Reina and I don’t think the same.
“Who the fuck are you?” he murmurs, still watching me like a hawk.
“I don’t know, Ash. I really don’t know who I am anymore. I woke up one day with no recollection of who or what I am, and I learned how much of a monster I’ve been. But I’m trying. I swear I’m really trying to be better and to make up for what I’ve done. So how about you help me out? If you tell me what I did to you, I’ll do everything in my power to fix it.”
I don’t know when he became this important, but he…did. This is some sort of syndrome. It must’ve started after he saved my life.
“Why do you keep saying shit like that?” “Like what?” “Like you care. Like you feel.” “I do feel. So much, it’s suffocating.”
there seems to be a sentence in a foreign font. Is that Arabic?
#דילמוסלמים
I struggled with the feeling of belonging and having something—or someone—completely belong to me. Now, I admit to wanting Asher to be that someone. I want him to belong to me. Talk to me. Touch me.
“Even Asher.” She grins mischievously. “He looks at you differently, you know.” “Differently how?” “Like he can’t wait to get you alone.”
It’s like he’s fascinated with the act of touching me, like he can’t believe he’s actually doing it.
“You’re driving me fucking crazy, prom queen,” he growls, gripping me harshly by the nape. I wrap my arms around his neck. “You drive me crazy, too.”
“How long do you think I can stay strong? What if I’m weak inside?” I sniffle, meeting his gaze. “Would you let me lean on you?”
I don’t want to be apart from him anymore. I don’t want to fight the feelings I’ve developed for him.
“You’re playing with fire, Reina,” he says lowly, almost apologetically. “Then I’ll just burn.”
That could mean I have a dissociative personality disorder or something. That’s the only explanation for the fact I talk to myself and have two names for me.
If you hate me so much, why do you keep coming back to me?”
He broke me in a whole different way than he initially planned. He was after my spirit, he got my heart.
