Dear Edward

by Ann Napolitano

He closes his eyes for a second, and Edward sees the lines of pain on Gary’s face; they’re the same lines—carved by loss—that engrave Edward’s whole self, and the boy shudders in recognition.

As a writer, I'm satisfied with this scene. I like Gary very much, and I felt like I was able to express what I wanted to in their dialogue and Edward's thoughts. It's rare for me to feel like a scene couldn't use more revision, so I thought I'd point it out. No reader has ever mentioned this scene to me, so I don't know that it struck anyone else, particularly, but that's okay. I worked on this novel for eight years, and when I re-write I have an internal tuning fork that tells me if a sentence is correct and true. I try to get as many of the sentences as possible to hit the right note, but I'm unable (unfortunately) to get them all right.