Why Are We Yelling?: The Art of Productive Disagreement

by Buster Benson

THE VOICE OF POSSIBILITY “What are we missing?” “What else is possible?” “What else can we do with what we have?” “Who else can we bring into the conversation to give us a new perspective?” The fourth voice, the voice of possibility, represents a way to approach conflict that diverges from the first three. The way we argue is no longer working for us, and we need new conversational and mental habits to prepare us for today’s conversational climate. The first three voices attempt to resolve conflict, because conflict is seen as a problem. The voice of possibility seeks to make conflict productive, in the same way that a skilled gardener realizes that weeds are merely unloved flowers, and sometimes those unloved flowers produce sweet, sweet berries that can make delicious pies.