I believed it was not okay not to be okay, so I relentlessly pushed myself to fix myself. Did I know I was addicted to that pursuit? No. I thought I was living a life that was pleasing to God because I worked so hard to be worth loving. That worked until it didn’t anymore. I believe the mercy of God allows us at some point in life to hit the wall and, when everything else falls apart, we are held by His mercy.
