Oh, who am I kidding? Even if I lived in Idaho, married with seven kids whose births had effectively turned my womb and vajeen into an open-concept kitchen under renovation, and MBJ slid into my DMs like Tom Cruise slid across the hardwood floor in Risky Business, I would be like, “Husband, there are enough Lunchables in the fridge for the chillrens,” chuck up the deuces, and get on the first Southwest flight to the land of This Definitely Gonna Fuck My Entire Marriage Up but #KanyeWestShrug.
