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February 26 - February 27, 2018
“May I help you?” says a voice so soft that I’m certain it’s come from a mouse beneath the table to my side.
I smile and remind myself to be a gentleman. And a gentleman always makes a woman feel special no matter her appearance.
shrug, feeling thoroughly amused by her quirkiness.
have a passion for books, but public libraries are for common people and smell funny.
“Seriously?” It’s the middle of the day. What breed of nitwit hits a woman in broad daylight?
“I lost my maker ten years ago—a tragic roller-skating accident.” Roller skating? I can’t claim I’ve heard that one before. Vampires do not roller skate, just like they don’t break-dance or yodel. I mean, that’s just silly. “My condolences.”
“Chop-chop, everyone. Chop-chop.” Do not make the mean vampire cranky.
This is very interesting, and I won’t lie. My inner vampire child is jumping up and down screaming with glee. Mystery! Mystery! Mystery!
exit my car and come around to open the door for her. I like that she always waits. She enjoys being treated like a lady. Lucky her, I’m in the lady-pampering business.
“Oh, you mean the crack pipe on the ground? That’s part of the neighborhood’s attempt to keep out the bourgeoisie—they’re always snooping around, looking for their next gentrification opportunity.”

