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I loosened the flaps of the nappy and pulled it off. As I carried it over to the waste bin it felt unexpectedly heavy, as nappies often do, since the material creates an expectation of lightness. That weight felt good, it told me that you were all right, that your body was functioning as it should.
Like Leila as a baby, always throwing up.
taking your little fists in her own, which suddenly seemed big.
Ro’ya looked like a monster next to Leila, she was suddenly so big to my eyes.
A pile of envelopes containing bills lay on the table next to it, they were my bad conscience, I never seemed to get around to paying them, and when I finally did it was always so late that reminders and debt collection notices had already been sent. It was so simple, all you had to do was pay, I had money, and yet it was only through huge exertion that I managed to get it done.
Me, too.
my job was taking care of the shadows, so that they would grow up in the light. That I devoured shadows.
