“Yeah. And they spy on me through my TV, too. Saw it on the news. I had to get a really old one to stop that shit.” “You know TVs don’t work that way, right?” “The old ones don’t.” “None of them do,” I said. “They never have. The government isn’t spying on you. They wouldn’t waste the time.” “I know they have me on a list,” he said. “I’m sure they have you on several. Now take off your tinfoil hat and listen: I’m putting you on a list, too. It’s called the do-not-call list. Stop watching X-Files reruns and get outside more.” I hung up the phone before he could say anything else.
