Ban This Book

by Alan Gratz

“It’s our job as educators to expose our children to as many different kinds of books and as many different points of view as possible. That means letting them read books that are too easy for them, or too hard for them. That means letting them read books that challenge them, or do nothing but entertain them. And yes, it means letting students read books with things in them we might disagree with and letting them make up their own minds about things, which is downright scary sometimes. But that’s what good education is all about.”

I was glad to have my own copy, but I couldn’t help thinking about that book that wasn’t on the library shelves anymore, and how I would never have known From the Mixed-up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler was my favorite book if I hadn’t found it there in the first place.

I shrugged. “You would have liked it. They said ‘make a motion’ and ‘I second that’ a lot.” “Robert’s Rules of Order,” Rebecca said. “That’s what they’re called. It was written by Robert Somebody-or-other.”

I swore I would bear my pain quietly, and without complaint. If I had been quiet before, I was going to be silent from now on. Speaking up just got you into trouble.

“What good does it do to speak up when no one listens to what I’m saying?”

“But look at this.” Trey unfolded a piece of paper on the table. “The Stupids got challenged because it ‘reinforces negative behavior’ and ‘might encourage children to disobey their parents.’ Here’s a riddle book that got banned because it made kids who couldn’t figure out the riddles feel bad. My Teacher Is an Alien got challenged because it ‘portrays the main character as handling a problem on her own, rather than relying on the help of others.’ Here’s ‘destruction of property,’ ‘teaches kids to lie,’ ‘a real downer,’ ‘anti-family,’ ‘lewd,’ ‘twisted,’ ‘too mature,’ ‘too immature,’ ‘bad grammar,’ ‘promotes poor nutrition,’ ‘includes the word fart twenty-four times—’”

“The Lorax? That’s libelous. The Lorax portrays lumberjacks and the timber industry in a negative light. “Goodnight Moon? The mouse in the room is a health-code violation, the red balloon is a choking hazard, and look at this picture of the illustrator on the back—he’s holding a cigarette! That encourages kindergarteners to think smoking is cool. “Oh, and don’t get me started about Amelia Bedelia. She clearly has Asperger’s syndrome, and yet children are encouraged to laugh at her? What kind of message is that sending? “This library is a lawsuit waiting to happen!” Rebecca told me. There was a gleam in her eye as she said it.

And that was it, wasn’t it? All the book challenges, the real ones, were because one person saw a book in a very different way than somebody else. Which was fine. Everybody had the right to interpret any book any way they wanted to. What they couldn’t do then was tell everybody else their interpretation was the only interpretation.

The Wake County School Board doesn’t want its students to read any books that scare them, or teach them, or entertain them, or show them new things, or make them sad, or happy, or shock them, or open their minds. Which is all of them.”

“I think you grew up to be a very nice person, and a good mom, and a very good citizen. Even though you read this book you said was so bad five times when you were in fifth grade. Probably because for all the amazing things books can do, they can’t make you into a bad person.”

Although, if you’re going to be a real librarian, we’re going to have to have a talk about library patron privacy.

“Why don’t Angelina and Alexis have to help?” I wanted to ask. So I did.

Mrs. Spencer had banned my favorite book because she thought it would encourage kids to lie, steal, and be disrespectful to adults, and I had done all of those things. But it wasn’t any book that made me do all that; it was banning a book that made me lie, steal, and be disrespectful to adults.

I thought that was pretty funny, and thought about saying so to my parents. So I did.