Unfu*k Yourself: Get Out of Your Head and into Your Life (Unfu*k Yourself series)

by Gary John Bishop

In simple terms, the language you use to describe your circumstances determines how you see, experience, and participate in them and dramatically affects how you deal with your life and confront problems both big and small.

Here’s the breaking news: your self-talk is fucking you over and in ways you can’t even begin to imagine.

How willing are you to consider that your life is the way it is, not because of the weight of your circumstances or situation, but rather the weight of self-talk that pulls you down? That what you think you can and cannot do is influenced much more directly by some subconscious response than by the reality of life itself?!

If you’re not willing to take the actions to change your situation—in other words, if you’re willing to put up with your situation—then whether you like it or not, that is the life you have chosen.

You cannot, I repeat CANNOT dwell in any blame game in your life. Even blaming yourself is completely useless.

To fully embrace my approach, you must first accept that while there are things that have happened in your life that you had no say in, you are 100 percent responsible for what you do with your life in the aftermath of those events. Always, every time, no excuses.

Every time you add the “but” to the end of that statement, you turn yourself into the victim.

Willingness to change, willingness to let go, willingness to accept. Real, magical, inspired willingness.

We put things off or avoid them completely because we tell ourselves we just don’t want to do it or that we can’t do it.

Is exercising thirty minutes a day really as impossible as your mind has built it up to be? Sure, you’re going to get a little sweaty and tired but you can throw on your favorite music to help the time go by faster. And, even though it might start out painfully, you’ll eventually get used to that and grow stronger.

We are wired to win—we just have to point ourselves in the right direction so we can win at something we consciously choose.

you wouldn’t live through the humiliation of some situation. But you did. You raised up and kicked on and, looking back, some of those problems might even seem a little silly now.

The future can have truly great things in store for you.

In this life, you’ll sometimes have to do things you don’t want to, with people you don’t like, and in places you don’t care for. People will leave your life as quickly and easily as they come into it. You’ll lose money, things will break, and your dog will die.

“It is during our darkest moments that we must focus to see the light.” - Aristotle

Remember, everything is solvable, and if you can’t see a solution, it only means you haven’t worked it out yet.

When you stick to what you’re comfortable with, doing the same things you’ve always done, you’re in effect living in the past—not moving forward.

They didn’t succeed because they were certain they were going to succeed; they succeeded because they didn’t let uncertainty stop them.

“If you want to win, you have to be willing to be judged by others.”

You are not your thoughts. You are not defined by what’s inside your head. You are what you do. Your actions.

“Sometimes you just have to grind it out, stake your claim, and hustle for what you want.”

“Stop doing all that shit you know you shouldn’t be doing and start doing all the shit you know you should be doing.”

When you expect nothing, you’re living in the moment. You’re not worrying about the future or rejecting the past. You’re simply embracing your situation as it comes. When you accept everything, that doesn’t mean you are okay with it or that you agree with it, but simply that you are owning it and in charge of it.

Don’t expect victory or defeat. Plan for victory, learn from defeat.