Arrows Through Archer

by Nash Summers

I was broken now, and I was utterly unfixable.

There was no light at the end of the tunnel because there was no fucking tunnel. There was a pit and in that pit was nothing but darkness. In the center, stood I.

When I reached the top and shoved the door open, the sky began to fall. Huge drops of rain beat down against my face. I closed my eyes and stood on the pavement, hands shoved into my pockets, praying to the sky that it would flood the entire world.

There were periods of time when we didn’t talk, though. We just… were.

“Different isn’t always bad.” “No, but it is always different.”

That was the strange thing about misery: it loved company.

It was like we shared a secret—a secret I wish we didn’t share. A secret I wished I didn’t have.

The hush around us was loaded. Bullet in the chamber. Finger on the trigger.

“Don’t you want to be happy, Ace?” And because he was my best and only friend, I said, “I don’t know. I don’t remember what it feels like anymore.”

An arrow through the heart might’ve been easier to take than Mallory’s expression when he looked at me.

The memory struck me. Straight. Through. My. Heart.

I wondered if I’d ever feel this way about anyone else in my life or if this was it for me.

“What are we doing, Archer?” Mallory asked. Falling in love, I thought. But instead I said, “Kissing.”

“We can’t keep loving ghosts, Mallory.” And for the last time, his eyes met mine. “It’s not that easy, Archer.” “Well, I guess we’re both about to find out if it’s any easier loving one more.”

Yes, I thought. This. This is happiness. This is what I want.